bitchin camaro

To be fair, he really is doing it wrong.

I've only been to IKEA once, in Charlotte, and the whole time I kept thinking it was one bigass fire trap. I couldn't find my way back to kitchenware, much less out the door if there were an emergency.

I think you can find those on Aisle 137 at IKEA

I don't know about worse, but Charter is terrible, terrible, terrible. And to keep it on topic, their ads make everything in this thread except Pull That Peach look charming and intelligent in comparison.

The "reality goggles" ad reminds me of the time we had a health fair at work and one of the stations was "drunk goggles". I'm not proud of the fact that I could walk the line 100% straight with them on.

I will never, ever be able to see Kevin Nealon in a commercial and take it seriously. I keep expecting a "Colon Blow" or "Bad Idea Jeans" punchline.

Even though I watched 90210 religiously in high school, there was never a moment when I was attracted to any of the fellas on this show. As I get older, I'm starting to find Jim slightly attractive, which disturbs me greatly.

This may have already been discussed, but the Johnson & Johnson ad honoring hospice nurses - it says some people believe a window should be open so the soul can leave, then the nurse closes the window and says "not tonight". That's some horseshit - hospice isn't about keeping people alive longer or keeping the soul in a body that can't function anymore. Hospice nurses are truly angels among us (and I say that as a 100% non-religious person) and this doesn't represent their mission well at all. I don't have a dog in the fight, so I'm not sure why it burns me up so bad - maybe it's that it's hard enough approaching the end of life without some baby powder company telling us we're doing it on the wrong timeline. Grrrrr.

Coked up Kelly was the best!

What in the fuck is up with the "we're pretzels baby" lady? I'm usually a fan of weird stuff like that (the Halos kid with the horse head in the bed slays me), but I don't get this one at all.

That commercial about never getting married, never moving to the suburbs, never having another kid, never driving a minivan, then "I'm never letting go." If the pattern were to hold, the next scene is dude with a 22 year old girlfriend and a divorce attorney.

Little Sweet cracks me up, although not as much right this second since the Prince show I had tickets for last night got cancelled because he had the flu.

Can we go ahead and do away with all products called "Bliss"?

That sounds like my kind of cooking!

It reminds me of the old Cover Girl "Clean Makeup" line. I get where they were going with that, but no, putting colored sludge on your face that will have to be washed off at the end of the day is NOT clean, even if it's hypo-allergenic-organic-free-range makeup.

I have no idea what the "Pull that peach!!!" broad looks like, but I could hear her all the way in the kitchen when that ad came on and she scared my dog.

I know this is a strange association, but Billy Joel's "Captain Jack" has always annoyed me for the same reason. I can hear about "I" did this or "Gina" or "Eddie" did that, but "YOU" just irritates me.

I really could have sworn Isaac said "steak fried chicken" when he was first describing his dish. I have no idea how that would have worked, but it would definitely have been surprising!

Pepper jelly is divine. We always have it with cream cheese and crackers at Christmas. And now I've got a hankering for some guava jelly too. I don't eat a lot of bread these days, but I've got to try that creole stuff.

I'd lose it with the punching. I don't like people touching me at all, even in a joking manner, so maybe that's on me, but it still seems like an overstepping of bounds. I grew up with a mother who hates seafood (like to the point where she can't help but make weird faces if you order it at a restaurant in front of her - she tries to hide it but can't quite manage to). Somehow, she loved this creation her mother used to make called tuna stew - basically canned tuna boiled in milk with butter, salt, and pepper. Even though I love fish, I could not stomach that dish and it has clouded my ability to ever eat fish and anything dairy. I don't like chicken with cheese either, though, so maybe I'm just weird. Actually, now that I think about it, that "dish" might be why I don't care for butter either. The way it congealed on top of the stew gave me the willies.

Artisinal toast? Fuck me gently with a chainsaw. I really hate sudden death quickfires and even more so at this stage of the game. Come on, now - that's just not fair. I adore Hubert Keller so it was a lot of fun to see them cook for him. I was crossing my fingers for my homeboy Isaac and it worked! At this point, it sucks to see any of them go, and I think the only way Isaac wins it is to study up on refinement in the meantime, but I'm pulling for him.

I feel that way about spiders. I remember going to the children's museum when I was a kid and they had a "rainforest" where there were a couple of tarantulas and the presenter tried to get us to pet them. Notafreakingchance. Do y'all remember that cell phone ad where a picture of a spider pops up when the phone rings and the lady at the table just loses her shit and they smash the phone to bits? I would be that lady.

OMG, I would feed them ALL the barbecue. They're so cute!

Seems like if you don't have a recipe for waffles, you don't center your recipe on waffles. It's not rocket surgery.

I think this is the key - as he was leaving he said he'd been working so hard for 5 years. And I'm sure he has, but 5 years does not a Top Chef (or Top Anything) make. He's young and has a great future ahead of him - this just wasn't his jam. Yet.