grumpypanda

Judging on physical appearance alone, I don't think Matt is a bad looking guy. I'm an average looking 38 year old woman and if I were single and slightly buzzed and Matt approached me in a bar I would let him buy me a beer. He's not hot but he's better than Gary.

I don't think Neil is attracted to Sam but he's too polite to say it on camera. He might have found her vaguely attractive when he first saw her but her personality is so off putting that there's no way he's attracted to her now. It's funny because Sam has been insisting that she doesn't feel any sexual chemistry with Neil yet in the past episodes she's been throwing out some subtle and so not so subtle hints that she wants him to make a move. Maybe it's just me but I don't throw my crotch in the face of a man I find repulsive. I also don't lift my shirt up and start rubbing my belly in front of him either. She says she wants him to be more aggressive and I'm starting to wonder if she means sexually (she also bat shit crazy so who knows.)

This show rarely makes me laugh but the cooking segments cracked me up this episode. First, we have Sam acting all proud for having cooked a homemade boxed meal and then Tres with his taco salad. I thought it was cute when Vanessa realized that she didn't need to make an elaborate meal to make Tres happy and that he would be content with some Doritos and lettuce. I thought they were funny at the painting place too. Tres likes to sip before he strokes. Same old boring shit with Ashley and David. Ashley really does have a way of making everything about her. She just tells David that she's not attracted to him so he's understandably upset and she's upset because he's making her feel uncomfortable. When is she not uncomfortable? Strangers make her uncomfortable. Touching makes her uncomfortable. Talking makes her uncomfortable. Life in general makes her uncomfortable.

Brandon and Teresa specifically said that they did not want Butch (my spell check keep changing it to bitch) introduced to Carley so it wasn't so much what he said to her it was the fact that he approached her at all. I guess it really doesn't matter since Carley didn't seem all that affected by the encounter and probably forgot all about the strange old man the moment he walked away.

That makes sense. I was confused about the time line since Leah and Bentley are in school in their segments and I was assuming that Mtv was showing everyone in the same order.

Farrah thinks it's so funny to mock grandma in front of Sophia now but just wait because ten years from now it's going to be her crying while her ungrateful bitch of a daughter treats her like shit. Does Sophia go to school? We're like five episodes in this season and Farrah has dragged that kid all over America. She's been to Nebraska, Missouri, San Diego, Las Vegas and Seattle (I may be missing some place too.) Anyway, Ryan can't even fake five minutes of enthusiasm while doing a wholesome activity with his son. That guy is like a walking Valium. I was literally yelling at Butch to leave Carly alone at the wedding. I wouldn't be surprised if B and T don't show up at anymore family events because Cate and Tyler's people have no concept of boundaries. I loved the Bud Light can in the background while Cate and Teresa were having their special moment. Stay classy Cate.

I'm not seeing this brutish behavior either. In the beginning all he was trying to do was talk to her and form a friendship but Ashley wanted no part in getting to know David. She decided the moment she first saw him that he wasn't worth her time. Besides morphing into a completely different human being there isn't anything David could do to change her mind. She has a very narrow definition of what she finds attractive and should have never been selected for this show. Most people have a type but are still willing to go outside of their typical type if someone interesting comes along but Ashley seems very rigid about men and about a lot of things in her life. I still don't think she's shy, I just think she's a snob. I'm pretty sure that her two month rule is some bullshit that she made up for the show. I doubt many attractive and successful men in their thirties are willing to wait two months for a possible kiss on the cheek or a quick hug good night.

It's strange seeing those pictures of Farrah looking like an actual real person and not a plastic mannequin. She looks pretty even with her slightly large nose. Sophia looks just like daddy Derek. Slap a unibrow, a ratty wig and some messy clothes on him and you have the spitting image of that kid.

Up until this episode I had no reason to believe that Sam and her roommate were really a couple but something about the way Sam spoke about going to Sami's room convinced me that something is going on between them that is more than friendship. I'm guessing that Neil felt it too and that's why he changed his mind about living with both of them. He's definitely the third wheel in that house. It's obvious that Sam doesn't want the marriage to work and is trying to push Neil out but he is to damn stupid or stubborn to walk away. I don't know if it's because she's in love with her roommate but she definitely doesn't like Neil. I also noticed how terrible both Sam and Neil looked during their visit with Dr. C. They need to end this charade and stay at their own places. They will never have a real and happy marriage. Anyway, I'm convinced that Ashley has never had an orgasm in her entire life. She is wound up so damn tight that she is about to explode. David, consider yourself lucky to divorce her after six weeks. If she does eventually have sex with you it's only because she wants babies and once she has those babies her shop will close up for good. I'm kind of annoyed that Dr. C told Ashley and David to take sex and all forms of affection and intimacy off of the table for now to please Ashley. Well what about David's needs? What if he needs a hug sometimes to feel validated? On a lighter note, I hated Ashley's outfit at the little get together. I get that Atlanta is hot but those tiny little shorts are not flattering on most women. That purple tank top wasn't doing her arms any favors either. And the mustache is back. I'm not saying she's ugly but she could look a lot better. I like her hair naturally curly. The wild curls make her features look less severe.

I wanted to add my two cents on Amber, the fact that she only has Leah 4 mornings a month and she can't even be bothered to get up with her really annoys the hell out of me. How damn lazy is she? She has 26 or 27 days out of the month to sleep as late as she wants and she can't get her lazy ass out of bed before 10:30 just 4 times a month to fix her kid breakfast? It's not even about breakfast, it's about spending time with your kid that you only see a handful of days a month. I seriously cannot stand that bitch! I think I hate her even more than Farrah now. At least Farrah spends time with her troll. Hell even Jenelle shoves a bottle in The Roll's mouth. Did Kristina really give up custody of her daughter so she could film Teen Mom? If so, that's just sick.

Sophia is the creepiest kid I have ever seen. That voice is terrifying! I felt bad for the driver. I wonder what he was thinking. He's got a camera crew and some freaky looking plastic woman and her troll child speaking in a crazy voice about wanting to die all the while heading to the cemetery. I'm glad to see that Maci and Taylor don't let a little thing like a newborn baby keep them away from party time.

I'm so curious to see Hope at the reunion. She carries her weight in such an unusual way that I really want to see what she looks like at a normal weight. I wish she would have stayed at the ranch longer because we know contestants generally lose a lot less at home. Anyway, I thought the whole food truck thing was weird. Like someone else already said, why would someone agree to have their food advertised as the food you shouldn't be eating? I really don't like most of these people. I don't know why but I hate the twins and the married couple with the fat kid. Toy's also working my last nerve. She knows damn well what she should and shouldn't be eating.

Of course there's nothing wrong with taking a break from your kids but the Teen Mom parents seem to always be dropping their kids off somewhere so they can party, get their nails done or meet with their lawyer. Maybe I'm just a little jealous because I don't have anyone to take my eighteen month old for an entire weekend. I can't even imagine having two whole days to do whatever I want. It sounds like pure heaven. Damn I want to be a teen mom!

I love the graphics on this show: TOPLESS = DANGER Anyway, I seriously hate these people and I'm not sure why I watch this show anymore. I did get a few good laughs though. At the beginning of the episode when Farrah is talking about her mom and daughter beauty line the camera pans over to Sophia and she looks like a demonic troll with a unibrow. For some reason I found this hysterical. Now I'm not generally one to snark on a child's appearance but Sophia is one tragically unattractive child. She's the last child that should be pimping a beauty line. Sorry but she's not facially gifted. Anyway, I fucking hate Amber as usual! What kind of bull shit was she saying at the park about Leah not having any other kids to play with? Did she forget that Kristina has a daughter about the same age as Leah and that Leah is at school all day with other kids. She likes to talk shit and she doesn't even know what she's talking about. Good job getting up at 10:30. I wonder what time Kristina gets up each day. Lastly, why do these people have kids if all they do is try to get away from them? I understand every parent needs a break (I could use one now) but Jade is like two months old and Maci and Taylor are already dumping her off at grandma's house for an entire weekend to party in another state. Can't these people have a regular date night like normal people?

I noticed that Tres and Vanessa's fish bowl was almost filled to the top with questions and David and Ashley's fish bowl only had a handful of questions in it. I'm guessing that Ashley wouldn't even agree to the fish bowl game unless only the PG questions were left in. I understand not wanting to answer some of the dirtier questions on camera but most of the questions were pretty tame. I seriously doubt any man would wait two months to get into Ashley's granny panties. What is wrong with David? I yelled at my tv and woke my baby up when he said he was falling in love with the robot. He must really hate himself. Anyway, Sam needs to close her damn legs. For a minute I thought Neil was going to pull out a speculum and perform a gynecological examination on her. She's just gross. What's the deal with their house? They've lived there like 12 days but it's creepy so they're moving into Sam's house. Yep, that makes sense.

I just watched the second half of this mess and I don't understand why Debra doesn't tell Farrah to go fuck herself. She acts as if watching her demon spawn for a month is some sort of a privilege and Debra should be honored to be her slave. Anyway, I hate Amber almost as much as Farrah. That nasty bitch should be thanking Kristina for taking care of her kid instead of talking shit about how she could do it better. Yeah Amber, your such a wonderful mother that your kid doesn't even want to see you. I don't believe that Amber and Matt are clean either. Sitting around all day, doing nothing is a lot more fun when you're buzzed.

Vanessa is a drama queen. He went out and got drunk with his dad and uncle, big deal. They've been together for two weeks straight, maybe he just needed a break. As long as it's not something that he does on a weekly basis cut the guy some slack. She said that she was scared of being in the house while he was drunk. Scared of what, he's passed out, go to bed! She went out too so I don't know what her problem was. Anyway, I'm starting to see Ashley's point of view, David would drive me bananas with his constant relationship talk. He was even reading a book about relationships. He needs to chill out a bit and give her some space. I understand how he feels too because talking to Ashley is like talking to a brick wall but at some point he needs to give up. I really think these two need to stop these forced conversations and just try to have fun together. Maybe get drunk and play Scrabble together or watch a marathon of some really cheesy tv show. They need to do something light to break the ice.

I decided a long time ago the only way to watch this show is to dvr it and to fast forward about 50% of it. I seriously cannot stand the sob stories. I'm sorry about Toy's son and Erin's father but I really hope we don't hear about their deaths continuously all season (I'm sure we will though.) Anyway, the couple with the 12 year old daughter really pissed me off. I couldn't believe that they said their daughter MAY be overweight and that their poor eating habits MAY have affected her. I really hope that they're serious about getting themselves healthy and getting their daughter healthy too. That poor girl looked over 200 pounds.

Darn, I didn't realize that there were two episodes on. Anyway, I assumed Farrah took those flowers from the wedding and wrote the note to herself. Also, I'm kind of of a shower fanatic but I thought that it was gross that Farrah went to the zoo and then went out to dinner in the same dress. Wouldn't you want to shower and change between those events? Just me? Amber handled the Leah situation all wrong. She really has no idea what it means to be a parent. Gary isn't perfect but I feel bad for the guy. I can't imagine having to deal with Amber. You really can't talk to her without her freaking out. Again, what the hell does she do all day? What do any of these people do all day? No one works, no one goes to school, the kids are in school or daycare all day so what is everyone doing? I want to see the look on Brandon and Teresa's face when Butch hands Carley his handmade prison doll.

I watched Forbidden Love also but I didn't have a problem with Joseph's mom. She wasn't encouraging her son to drop out of school and marry Amenia and I don't think she did anything wrong. Joseph loved her and was going to be with her with or without his mother's blessing. Anyway, I kept waiting for the announcement that Joseph committed suicide and I'm relieved that he's still alive. This story is such a tragedy all around and it disgusts me that the monster that killed those two girls is walking free. His wife should also be in jail. I've never heard of this story so I looked it up after I watched this show and they left out a lot of important information. I realize that a one hour show can't cover everything but I don't think this show did Amenia and Sarah justice. I saw that a documentary was recently made so I'm going to check it out.

The last episode of season two aired in the beginning of June so this group got married a few weeks after season two ended. I don't understand why anyone would agree to go on this show after watching that disaster.

Wow, Ashley was actually smiling in tonight's episode. It's the prettiest I've ever seen her look. Part of me thinks that Ashley only warmed up to David after she learned that he made a very good living and was willing to foot the bill for a beautiful home and would cover all of the bills while she finished school. That's a pretty sweet set up for her. It's definitely strange that she was with her ex for nine years and never lived with him. Anyway, Neil cracked me up when he was talking about wax being Sam's thing. He's a weird guy but I like his sense of humor. I think these two might end up friends but there is zero chance that they will get physical. This season feels so much different than season one. I think with the first season the couples were looking at this as a real marriage and merging two lives but in this season everyone seems to be already looking at the end date.

I always assumed Blake was guilty but this episode got me thinking that maybe it's possible that one of the other men that Bonnie scammed killed her. Everyone involved in this case is so strange and shady that I really don't know what to believe. Something about Bonnie's daughter seemed off. I find it hard to believe that Bonnie was this wonderful mother that Holly seems to remember. Bonnie didn't deserve to be murdered but she was a scam artist not some genius business woman. Holly was acting like aspiring to marry a rich celebrity is a normal dream. Bonnie was a scum bag that purposely created a children to trap men. What kind of vile person does that? I don't know what to make of Blake. He's definitely nuts but I don't know if he's a cold blooded killer. Then again he might be.

I wanna play, Neil- 3 He's not hideous but I'm generally not a fan of facial hair and he's a little too feminine for my taste (yuck, I sound like Sam). He could be more attractive if he shaved and got a better wardrobe. I might sleep with him out of curiosity though. Strange looking men are often great lovers. Tres- 5 He's perfectly acceptable looking but I still find his appearance a little boring. I don't think he's very sexy but that could change after a few drinks. I might sleep with him if I were bored and intoxicated. David- 6 I don't normally like gingers but there's something about David that I find appealing. I think he's got a cute smile and has nice eyes. I would sleep with him by the third date, no alcohol required. Vanessa- 9 Definitely the prettiest woman ever to be on this show. Ashley- 5 Average looking but can look pretty with the right hair and makeup. Sam- 4 Not atrocious but her eyes are too close together and she looks dirty most of the time.

The thing with Ashley that I don't get is she's a very average looking person herself so realistically she could never land a guy that is super attractive. David might not be gorgeous but at least for me he's the kind of guy that gets more attractive the more you get to know him. I think his smile is super adorable. I know you can't help who your attracted to but I'm a firm believer that attraction can grow with time (as long as you don't find the person physically repulsive which David is not.) When I first met my husband I didn't feel instant sexual chemistry but after a few dates and a few drinks I was ready to jump all over him. It actually caught me off guard how quickly my feelings changed. I think the same thing happened to Jaclyn and Jamie so it does happen.