Eldemarge

I'd really like all these people on stage who think Natalie owes loyalty to Mike to get the fuck over themselves.

Holy F-150, you're right.

Do you she suppose she actually viewed this season?? I think WE should host this show.

It was either this or "Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps" so yes, I make sacrifices for y'all. Ready for the burning dumpsters!

Tiffany is bringing her exposed shoulders to the reunion!

I bet he's also a very selfish lover. "Oh, did you want me to do something?? *rolls eyes, shrugs, sighs, falls asleep*

Please, Universe. Please let us see Charlie get an ass beating for once. We don't ask for much.

And she's doing just fine! Except begging her kids for money so she doesn't starve.

See, I totally get it. This man is the only man around for literal MILES? Yep, I am ready for a girlfriend now. Easy choice.

Royd, Sally, royd! I think Jovi thought he'd go get to watch his strippers AND luck out and get Yara all horned up so she'd put out on their "date." But honestly, he probably just needs to stay sober for a bit, be nice to his wife, and stop berating her for being the mother of his child and the sex would come naturally. But him being a big stupid selfish POS, that was never going to happen. Here's hoping Yara drops the dead toothy weight one day and finds a real relationship.

Oh no. Do I have to get D+ now?? I want to see the relationship fails of Love in the Caribbean!

Oh jeez, I see Angela has still not invested in a purse.

Don't forget the next step: And then he parks her in front of strippers to end the date.

Oh HELL no! Whitney is still on TV??? STOP IT.

Tiffany: So I took on this Project Man and I totally FIXED him so why do I not have accolades every single day???

I'm thinking I'll be Dinyell.

I love Stacey telling Darcey during the promo that she might be a Sugar Mama. PROJECTING MUCH, Stacey?? Florian hasn't paid for a damn thing and doesn't intend to. Also, that jacket Darcey is wearing is just making me clammy. That does not look comfortable.

Oh no. I just turned on the TV. ....Help help help absolutely not help D:

Good night all! Glad to be back with y'all. We're Twin Flames!

Okay, I didn't imagine it.

I'm so weirded out by TLC's idea of "sexy." Phone calls in the bubble bath and someone feeding someone else strawberries. They keep using these things to signal "LOOK HOW SEXY" and it just bombs so hard!

And this is why you don't have kids with a fuckboi. Take note.

Mike in that outfit has killed my sex drive for the week. Thanks a lot, TLC.

"Vat's wrong? You look sad." It's his breasts in that tight hoodie, Natalie.

Whatever Mike is wearing, it's offending me. He needs to go inside and get under a blanket.