KateHearts

exactly. Which is why it annoys me that everyone just throws it out there: "so, we're wondering if/when you're going to buy a place with Chris." Is it that hard to believe that they may either continue to have a relationship and live separately, or that they might just date for a few years and then move on? butttt.... she got a midlife/divorce tattoo!

Exactly. All the talk about needing to "move into the DW for a month" is weird. First of all, just call it Dad's house, ffs. And why do you need to "move in" as if you're going on a mission trip to a faraway land? Just make an effort to show up on the farm everyday for eight hours and work (it's what most people do!) and you might then "learn how to work the farm." It's as if a light has suddenly dawned after 28 years of total indulgence- "hmm. We may have to do something that's hard in order to inherit this beautiful piece of income-producing property. Holy shit!!"

This whole episode made me mad. And also wish I was into drinking games, as I could take a shot everytime I heard the word "farm," "snowbird," or oh, did I mention "farm"? Jeremy was so punch-worthy, sitting at the desk next to his MOTHER saying, rather bossily and rudely, "We just need to know your plans." Uh, no dude, you don't. You aren't entitled to anything of your parents', you have no business telling them how to run their lives and you sure as hell shouldn't expect to be the sole heir apparent to the money THEY earned selling their souls to cable TV. Just shut up and maybe work in the real world and then come back and let ol' Dad know if you, the Golden Boy, know about farming/accounting/management/construction to run that place. I am also really irritated that the expectation (from several comments by her family and others here) that Amy *should* be planning to buy a place with Chris. This is the 21st century and people do live independently and survive after divorce without having to latch, barnacle-like, onto another human being. She's dating the guy. Why should the twins and Matt be railroading her into shacking up with her current sexual partner? Maybe she wants to date and be left alone at the end of the day. And the house, based on the divorce agreement presumably signed by her and Matt, is HERS. Matt's double-talk about "we talked about you giving up the house, blah blah" is immaterial. Legally, she got the house. She's not living there for spite or because she can't move on. It's her home, she damn well can stay there if that's what she desires. I'm not a big Amy fan (personally, I don't think she's very smart and she is the "I use catchy sayings and act all philosophical and deep but underneath I'm kind of a Negative Nellie" type), but her sons and ex need to back off. The baby stories are way too boring. Zach and Tori- boring. I really don't have a lot of interest in listening to them talk about how their baby is the most amazing living thing on Earth. "oooh, look how he knows how to open his mouth for the spoon!" "Wow, we need to bring a lot of stuff with us when we travel with a baby." Fascinating. Audrey looks seriously pissed off all the time. Like she can barely stand to lower herself to be on camera. And honey, lots and lots of us (I'm talking millions!!!) have been New Moms. You are not reinventing the wheel here. It's hard, you're tired, and your boobs hurt. Welcome to reality. Interesting that the Instagram picture posted above mentions Molly and doesn't even identify Jacob.

He did formally propose, in a tent in the desert one night when they stayed there in Morocco. But all along I've thought it was totally a ploy on his and his family's part. Again I'll say this: there is NO WAY Nicole can afford to make the move to Morocco with May and support herself. Her family will likely bankroll it; it's likely they are stupid enough to do so rather than tell her that the money tree has shriveled up and died, and if she really thinks this is going to work out she will have to sling a lot more venti sugar-free mocha lattes to start saving for such a venture. She acts as if magically she's going to teleport herself there and continue to "support" a guy with no job where she can barely get around, much less speak the language or get herself meaningful employment.

I couldn't get over the massive platters of crap food that Annie and David were eating. He looks like he's a taco plate away from a massive heart attack- all the weight is back, he has huge bags under his eyes and now the stress of the injured son (who he has to admit he can't support now). And BTW, if I had just been SHOT IN THE FACE and was returning home from the hospital, you'd be damn sure I would not want the camera crew there chronicling my misery for junk TV. Poor Jacob. Molly's "concern" about Olivia being away seemed to focus more on her not having an available weekend caregiver for Kensley rather than the fact that Olivia has grave concerns about Luis. And the friend needs to go away. Really? She's going to vilify the 17-year old daughter who broke down and left because "she doesn't want Molly to find love"? Are these people on another planet? Even Molly's brother's "man-talk" with Luis ("you've got to be the man") did not come across as it should. To me, be the man means assume some responsibility; I'm sure Luis took it as "you be in charge and tell the lady what to do." Anfisa is acting out her role well- yes, I'm sure she misses Jorge and really wants to try- who wouldn't be longing for his sparkling personality, charismatic good looks and talent for witty conversation? The guy is so flat it makes me depressed just to watch him. One thing about Nicole I think we forget: her family MUST be at least in part bankrolling her trips to Morocco and application process. I cannot imagine for a nanosecond that she has the cash to pay for tickets for both herself and May to get there. So why don't they cut her off financially regarding the visa process? She gets her smug little smirk and says, "well, this is what I'm gonna do," and meanwhile lives in a hovel, works at best part-time as a barista and, according to her, is supporting Azan. The numbers just ain't working out. She is a child who tantrums and pouts to get her way; I would imagine that if parents and stepparents put their collective feet down and said, we can't afford anymore trips, she would be pissed off for awhile; but face it, she doesn't have the means to care for herself and May without a lot of family support and really wouldn't be able to up and move off and separate from them. She is the type who will always need lots of financial, emotional and social support. Her dad is a pushover (and I think that's where she inherited her IQ). Pao and Russ are getting boring. I have never heard of a condition which would predispose a pregnant woman to have a child with "weak bones" based on her blood (the more she spoke the less I believed her); Russ is kind enough but he needs another kind, less aggressive spouse because all he comes across as is a total doormat. His entire demeanor screams "kick me", and she does- gladly. Pedro and Chantal are quickly swirling the drain as she allows her family to continually harass him and he reaches the boiling point. Unfair of me, but his horrible ability to communicate in English is becoming annoying. And what a ragtag bunch of family members is the Family Chantal! We've got Mom, who really wishes she were in the fashion industry (cool vest), brother who really looks like a younger, more hostile version of Dad, rather ordinary Sister who's decided she wants her share of the TV action, and Chantal, who's pretty but so stiff you could snap her in half and has invested much more in her breasts and eyelashes than her education, it seems. I'm getting a kick out of the little intro poses the couples are doing prior to their segments. Nicole stands by a lake in her denim jacket with a fierce look on her face. The other couples all look like they're in standoff position.

I think in their situation it's hard to move on with Matt in her backyard, not to mention his insistence that they all act like one big happy family. It's very clear on Amy's face that she's massively uncomfortable (I'm sorry, I would be too)- and for Matt to "decide" that she and Caryn should plan the party together (along with his typical character jabs like "well, I hope Amy can accept Caryn someday;" and "I hope Amy is in a good mood," as if she is the only culprit in their divorce) is especially grating. Add to that Caryn's behavior (all the "woo hoo"ing, acting as if she runs the whole place) and I'd be irritated as hell. Caryn needs to back off. I thought her convoluted "If Amy asked me to leave, I'd give her my blessing" made it sound as if Amy needed Caryn to validate her. Caryn is not a family member, nor is she part of their business. Again- she's overstepping. Jeremy is such a dork standing their in his (too-tight) overalls, arms crossed and passing judgment with his stink-face on. Get over it, dude- your dad is the one who imploded your ideal family. It happens. The "date night" scenes with Z/T were mind-numbingly boring. All the obviously staged restaurant patrons side-eyeing them. Tori's dull conversations about the baby. Maybe if they went out into the world rather than spending their days sitting around their AC Moore-decorated house talking about how hard it is to sleep train a baby (how about working?!) they'd provide better TV fodder. Audrey has developed perennial resting bitch face. She is good inspiration for not procreating since she seems to be having the worst birth/breastfeeding experience ever and doesn't even seem to enjoy a single second with her precious baby. I was shocked that Ember is now six weeks old and Audrey hasn't even figured out how to grab some sleep or get out of the house. It's a wonder any of us survived having children at all, based on what they are portraying.

yeah, it's her money. But she also says that now that they're married, the money is both of theirs. Which I totally agree with. She can't have it both ways. Don't gripe about having financial difficulty and then get body modifications that surely cost a pretty penny.

The only toy I see Mae with is a little tablet computer, and then she's plugged into headphones. So sad.

Russ was on an assignment (he had a very good engineering career pre-Pao) and voluntarily left to return to Pao in Oklahoma after she arrived because he felt bad leaving her and then he subsequently lost his job. He made a very poor decision there- so losing his job wasn't just a result of an economic downturn. I remember him saying, "Pao comes first," and mooning over her being lonely (she did a lot of sad-face stuff while he was away). Another situation where the American spouse isn't forthright with the Green-carder about their situation. Don't invite them over (Jorge) leading them to believe you're a millionaire, or that you will be glued to their side every minute of the day, or that you can provide for them (David) when you don't have a cent to your name (despite your chunky ring and heavy gold necklace), or that you're just in it for the sexy time (Molly) when you really have a couple of kids that need supervision. I realize that Nicole is manipulating her family into paying for the Green Card using Mae (the cutest toddler ever, IMO) as a bargaining chip. The sad part is that her family is too stupid to realize that Nicole could never afford to get herself over there and support herself (and her child and "her world,") on her current income or lack thereof. I'm not sure why they don't cut her off from the dole and tell her to figure out how to support herself here and get her act together. Yeah, she could disallow the family from seeing Mae, but that won't happen. She needs them to babysit and take them out periodically for chicken tenders and fries.

I really don't think Audrey's stubborn insistence in breastfeeding is a religious thing; it's a hard-headed insistence that it's the right thing to do, no matter what, in accordance with hipster/cool/two-thousand-and-teens/everything must be carefully orchestrated guidelines. Along with husband sporting a man-bun, driving a vintage (unsafe) BMW around town, remodeling your 60s-era house yourself, and calling your spouse "babe" and everyone else "dude."

After 20 or so years of marriage, Amy and Matt have certainly become ingrained in certain patterns: he has about 34 new ideas to make money/start a business/invent something/build something every day. She develops an eyeroll response, argues that he needs to focus, etc. Over time, he starts hiding his "great finds," gloats to himself that he got away with something, and she sighs and complains because she is carrying the load of dragging her kids to soccer, school activities, etc. Her housekeeping (or lack thereof) is fodder for his needling and complaining. She bristles back. He can then accuse her of being angry all the time. They still are carrying out this behavior. Especially since they can't get out of each others' way living within spitting distance. Matt has an especially sneaky way of pretending to act accommodating and conciliatory ("you can sell your bread at the Pumpkin Season store!") followed by a little sad self-sacrifice speech ("I *was* going to use that space for my book,") and then a little jab: ("so how much are you going to pay back to the farm for sales of bread?") followed by another fake nice concession ("however you decide to do it is just fine with me.") Then the ultimate knife turn during his talking head: "Amy really doesn't understand how the business works." While Matt is more direct in his insults regarding his ex-wife, as in saying how happy he is that Amy is with someone who keeps her from nagging at him, Amy isn't without her share. Her constant smooching and fawning over Chris and saying how HAPPY she is are, in their own way, cut-downs of her ex. It's all pretty smarmy TV. I can't imagine airing my dirty laundry for TLC to display (probably after ten takes). They will never truly move on until the show ends and they can live in separate locations. The twins are generally annoying me because they don't seem to be doing a damn thing. Jeremy doesn't work, but he can't go out there and use his able-bodied self to actually get his father ready to open for Pumpkin Season? I'm sorry, but although new babies are work and complications such as sleep training or feeding issues can add to the drain, MOST PEOPLE ARE OUT MAKING A LIVING. Every single scene of J/A and Z/T are of them lounging in their living rooms (in very nice homes) during the day, pontificating and navel-gazing about their awesome roles as New Fathers as if they have re-invented the wheel. Jeremy's continual inclusion into everything such as nursing ("we're trying to get her to nurse more," "we're full term and ready to give birth at any time!") just grates on me. And the "did she eat? How much? Should we weigh her? Where's the scale? What's left in the bottle? Should we do her exercises? Let's do her exercises!" along with Zach/Tori's "let's do tummy time. He hates tummy time! We're putting him to bed now! He's crying! How long has he been crying?" are making for some really, really snooze-worthy TV. My humble suggestion would be for the Boyz to put their work boots on and go help dear old Dad (who can barely walk) do some grunt work around the farm so he doesn't have to hire a giant crew to paint a freaking pirate ship (I'd love to know what the expenses are for that property every year- given Matt's endless projects). I think we all know that if this family operated as we are seeing without a TLC paycheck, they'd have sunk a long, long time ago. Someone commented about Zach's rather low-level intelligence above when he discussed the baby "coming down the hole." He said something the other night about "sleep deprecation," or some other massacre of the English language. His wife just sits there (she's a teacher, no?) while he also says, "me and Tori are going on a trip..." I'd be nipping that in the bud quite fast.

From how it was presented, Jon made Molly aware that he started recording by saying, "so, Molly and I just had a big fight..." TO the camera. So to me, it isn't such an underhanded thing that he recorded the argument. She was either too drunk or too confident to think that he would actually expose her the way he did. I don't think he actually berated her regarding the sex issue, but he definitely got a little whiny about it. And it really wasn't the sex per se-it was her lack of genuine affection that translated into her almost physically recoiling near him. Where I think the problem lies in this show: the "experts" pretty much say that with the marriage license comes the expectation that sex follows naturally. And you can hear in the "expert" THs that they stupidly view these couples just as they would those who have years behind them before getting married. These people meet up as if they were on a first date and most need some time to warm up; the expectations shouldn't be the same as with "typical" newlyweds. Jon, I think, was all in with the experts: I'm entitled to get laid since I'm married. Their forcing the couples to do the ridiculous "fantasy" game further reinforced the narrative. Molly put on a red wig because that's what the show producers and ridiculous experts cooked up. Jon took it as an intro to sex. The whole thing is way too contrived and forced.

I'm almost caught up on this season and I've got to say, what "normal" family has a party for something nearly every damn day??! "Audrey is two weeks away from her due date so I'm going to throw an impromptu shower!" "Let's throw a party to watch Zach play Dwarf Soccer!" "We're having a GUYS ONLY Fathers' Day party complete with professionally done framed generational photos and more photos of us holding them!" Every party is decked out with Hobby Lobby decor and streamers. I guess when most of them don't have real jobs that involve getting up, getting dressed and going somewhere they can do that. And Amy's "special spaghetti" and boxed cupcakes are paraded out as if they were gourmet fare. Add to that the constant navel gazing: "Let's talk about how we feel that a baby is coming. We have so much fun and now there will be a baby and we can't be spontaneous!" (thought every couple ever- but didn't discuss it with everyone within 5 miles). Amy and Matt wax nostalgic constantly ("I can't wait to see the kids start their own traditions! I remember all the parties we had when they were babies!")- again, perhaps because they have time to. Most of us are busy not filming ourselves and then stop and say, "wow, how did my kid suddenly get to be 30?!" Their grammar (all of them) sets my teeth on edge. "This is a tough time for Matt and I," "Caryn and I's relationship is really comfortable," "Me and Tori are learning how to be parents." I think Zach's grammar gets me most because he's married to a schoolteacher! You can bet that if my husband said "This is my wife and I's house," I'd be correcting that. A 5-minute scene about how bad baby poop smells (or not), complete with Jeremy looking truly doubtful about his decision to impregnate his wife and wrinkling his nose in disgust is really not necessary. All babies poop and often it's messy, Jeremy. You've had nine months to research this and you still act as if it's a surprise that you are going to have to do everything for a newborn.

I still don't get that he was "shaming," and as for the whining- yeah, he made some comment like "if we were dating we'd be at least making out by now," which was stupid and childish. I have always maintained that there shouldn't be ANY expectations or timeline regarding sex in these situations because even though (as our experts love to point out) they have made a LEGAL COMMITMENT and are LEGALLY MARRIED, they are still equivalent to early dating and for many, physical attraction and intimacy will take time. Jon, to his credit, eventually decided to back off. But Molly's mentioning that she had engaged in more adventurous behavior, publicly, opened her up to his puzzlement when she clammed up right away. It's like someone saying how they love to travel and want to see the world, but then refuse to leave their house because they don't want to leave their hometown. Totally antithetical to what they've asserted, and asking about that doesn't make one a shamer.

Doesn’t Jaime have any other clothes? She wears that pink tablecloth every single week. And she talks so fast. She’s a horrible host.

I don't get this angle. Molly VOLUNTEERED the threesome tidbit. She wanted the world to know how daring and funloving she was, and Jon was trying to resolve the total disconnect between that presentation and the cold fish he had ended up marrying. Not an unacceptable point to make at all, IMO. I disagree. She was, for the millionth time, shutting him out. In a moment of frustration, he said what he did because he was totally puzzled. He was not obsessed- not sure where that came from.

I have no idea what the date convo meant between Ryan and Jackie.. reeling each other in? I’m like a little kid? This fishy is into you? Huh? I think Jackie is completely naive. And what on earth does she “Adore” about him? And he keeps referring to “ups and downs.” I don’t recall any true marital stressors they went through.

"Why did you want to get married at first sight?" (They all answer this at some point on this program.) Ryan: "Because I suck at relationships, I've had very few and I want someone who they say I'm matched with so that I don't have to do anything, change anything, or try to improve myself beyond my caveman bro-man status." Jackie: "Because I'm so psychically spent from losing my true love to death that I will leave my mate selection to the so-called Experts and trust, even though my match is a total douchebag, that this is right. It has to be right!!!!" Shawneice: "Because the Experts are going to find me someone who thinks like me, wants to do everything I do, will be an inseparable teammate, and will watch me cry. Every. Single. Day." Jephte: "Because I have never had a girlfriend, I don't know how to talk to girls, I'm really shy and introverted; so hey! I should just get married rather than learn how to relate to other humans!" Jon: "Because I'm buff, I'm an ex-military dude, I sweat and joke a lot, and I want a skinny blonde hot wife. I'll even quit my job and dump my pet for her! How irresistible is that?" Molly: "Because I lost my Daddy so I need a replacement. Requirements are: find Molly perfect; no touching; and join me on 'adventures' such as riding roller coasters and making apple pie! Yay!!!"

Bettie Jo is saying "Dr. Now is not my doctor..." uh, yes, he is. And if he is going to be treating you medically and surgically, I'm sure you signed a release of medical information form when you signed on with him. He can't treat you properly without knowing your entire medical history and what is going on with you physically.

That could be a plus... kind of negated by his bragging about how "the girls aren't eating this good!" to his bro friends. That was a firehouse meal if I ever saw one- right down to the giant potato vat.

Exactly. And what would happen? She would dissolve into tears and beg to know why you don't want to accompany her to the bathroom, watch her cook dinner, or sit in locked arms with her and watch TV. Totally exhausting.

I agree, but I think there are ways people can discuss their marriages with outsiders that can reflect respect and maintaining privacy for their spouses. Sure, let them all talk about their uncertainties and how weird this whole experiment is. But sometimes they seem to just use a night with the guys/girls to talk trash behind the other spouse's back. Ryan specifically comes to mind- he "recalled" coming home to Jackie (after a night out when she stayed home sick) that she was nagging him and generally complained about her. And yes- their recall can leave a lot to be desired. Molly keeps insisting that Jon "yelled at her" and "twisted her words." I think she's had some time to clean up the bar escapade in her mind. Now it's " he took it out of context," and "I meant that his recording me was disgusting, not that HE is disgusting." And also blaming his giving up totally on the fact that they hadn't had sex. Watching their clips, she is so stiff and uncomfortable around him, he finally accepted the obvious- that she was not at all romantically interested and possibly turned off by him physically. (I think she liked him- briefly- as a pal, someone who could share "adventures" with.) Why she insisted that her feelings might grow-? For TV only, IMO.

Everything that comes out of Ryan's mouth sounds to me like either 16-year old speak or Hallmark Cards. He really doesn't understand- at all- what it's like to be committed to another human being. From the beginning, I found him massively immature and always trying to be "one of the guys" while all the guys were probably laughing behind his back. I just can't understand why Jackie is so oblivious to his shallow personality. The only excuse I can think of is that she is still shell-shocked from the loss of her true love, and that she has put 100% faith in the "experts" who matched them. She mentions this constantly: "I know we were matched for a reason." She overall seems thoughtful, level-headed and interesting; it's baffling that she still is viewing Ryan through rose-colored glasses- as if at some point it will all make sense and the stars will align. Sadly, that isn't going to happen. Her entire description of being blind-sided revealed how hard she's worked in trying to ignore his obvious immaturity, selfishness and overall douchiness. Molly had a very interesting take on Jon when talking to Jackie: "He's made it clear that he doesn't want to try anymore," as if he just threw in the towel and tossed her aside. Her chilly attitude is so obvious when watching them. My theory on her is this: She lost Daddy, her #1 Main Man who saw no wrong in her (or so she relates) at the age of 18. At that point, her growth as a woman and transition to becoming a mature individual who has adult relationships stopped. She has Daddy issues. Every man she dates or whoever she eventually marries must love her totally unconditionally, never criticize her and never think she is anything but a Perfect Princess. And she does not need to exert any effort into the relationship. She needs counseling. As for Jephte and Shawniece, although they are the most likely to survive beyond decision day, they are exhausting. She wants everything-from grocery shopping to driving in the car to watching TV- to be a COUPLES' BONDING EXPERIENCE involving TEAMWORK and being ALL IN. It's exhausting to watch, and I'm sure to live- which results in Jephte shutting down. I would be waving my arms around and saying "GIVE ME SOME SPACE!!!" So he's developed a pouting routine and once she hounds him enough, he insults her and she cries and they argue about what to most of us is seemingly nothing. (Whose car to drive? Really?) I appreciate that they seem to get over their tiffs fairly rapidly, but the drama is way too much. That said, Jephte is the only one of the men who respects his wife even when away from her- you can tell he is careful not to tell tales out of school when hanging with his bros at dinner. That is an admirable trait. To me, guys who complain about their wives behind their backs are pretty disrespectful spouses.

I really think she views him as a family member. She said being at Disney with him was like "being with my family." She friendzones him constantly. I can see