Victor the Crab

Four words: Bill Cosby, PUDDIN' POPS!

YAAAY!!!!! Praise Jesus and Fuck You Chris!

The Twilight franchise grossed $5 billion? Our culture sucks! Awesome Prince Hawcat costume Stephen was wearing, but what happened to Tek Jansen? Was it not good enough, or was Stephen trying to go incognito at ComicCon?

Very satisfying segment all around on the clueless NFL - and a satisfying smackdown to the stupid Sean Hannity, who's long overdue to see a shrink. And yet, we'll all sit down at our TVs and watch NFL games because we're that addicted to it.

That just guarantees Jon will ask Bill if Hillary's running for president. :D

Bill Cosby dissaproves of your swearing! >:( (Couldn't help but think of Cosby's appearance on TDS and how dissapointed he was with Jon and all the swearing on the show)

"Waaaaah!!! Hillary better tells us if she's gonna run for president. or we're gonna hold our breaths until we turn blue!" That photo bombing squirrel has more class than the chatter faces of network news, with Scarborough having the least.

Great timing by Stephen as the CGI eagle flew into the window with the quote in its talons. Good band for a trio of preteens. Let's hope they don't end up going the full Bieber if they become successful.

I remember them endlessly attacking the President and First Lady for inviting poet/rapper Common to the White House for a poetry jam session because of one line of one of his songs about killing a police officer that was deliberately taken out of context - all in order to divert people's attention from Obama successfully green lighting the takedown of Bin Laden. Jon spoke of that, and completely ripped Fox News a big one for their cheap and petty attacks, then took up Bill O'Reilly's invitation to come on his show to debate him on that, and proceeded to rip several new one in him so bad that O'Reilly issued a mea culpa on his show the next night.

It is. But some wuss out and put tighty whiteys on in order to feel a sense of security. I actually did this at the beginning, I was 24 at the time, until I decided to try and go commando just once. I never went back afterwards.

Stephen done let slip his kilted slip with his FREEDOM chant. As someone who has been kilted himself from performing in a pipes and drums band, kilts come in real handy when you need to go to the urinal. Especially when you're totally freeballing. I'd imagine Stephen felt liberated. As for David Cameron, it looks as if he done fucked up.

I wish Jon would do his Kerry impersonation. That was one of his better bad impressions. But huzzahs to Jon for devoting an entire segment to facespanking the despicable lowlife, Lindsey Graham. Especially when Jon uses his mock Lindsey impersonation to depict him as a dramatic ham with the vapours.

Gotta love Stephen's impatience over getting his hands on the latest Apple products. And the lengths he'll go to keep relevant with one.

There's no denying it. We men are pigs. Expect the knuckle draggers on the right to accuse Jon of trying to aid in the pussification of males. Goin' to Chicago tomorrow. May not post anything 'till next week.

Will they get Rick Perry as a guest, I wonder?

Attention media. Nobody fucking caaaaaares about a figurehead couple from another hemisphere who have nothing in common with everyday people having a second child. That's why everybody hates your fucking guts. FutureStephen should have been an ongoing character. Maybe we (me) can ask FutureStephen if Toronto FC will ever make the playoffs.

In an off topic comment in Toronto, Jon was asked who he'd vote for as the city's mayor in the upcoming election, if he lived there. His answer: Olivia Chow, which thrilled her as she and her late husband, former federal NDP leader Jack Layton, are and were big fans of his and went so far as to attend a couple of his standup shows when he was in town. (P.S., avoid the comments at the bottom of the page, as most of it is what one would expect from the readership of the Toronto Sun, aka The World's Worst Newspaper™.)

Attention Colbert Nation Canada. After sending them an e-hate-mail last week over what they plan to do with TCR, The Comedy Network responded back with this: Translation: TCR will be shown at 12:35PM right after Kimmel, a full hour and five minutes after TDS. I'm not sure whether I should be relieved or pissed at this news.

The CBC is all over Jon. I'm holding out hope he'll get interviewed by their big kahuna Peter Mansbridge for one of his One on One sessions.

Some of the things Jon talked about during his Mavericks session at tonight's Princess of Wales theatre in Toronto. And some partying going on at the Grey Goose.

Samantha and Jason have been around the longest, by far, than any of the other correspondents, but I don't think either one has the chops to host the show on their own or together. Jessica may be the best choice to host the show, in a substitute moment at the least. But she's just turned 25 and may still be considered green in the industry. And both Jordan and Michael are still considered "new guys" within the TDS family, and therefore probably wouldn't be considered for the hosting chair. Let's face it. If Ollie were still around, Jon wouldn't be putting up a rerun for Monday's show.

Jian Ghomeshi is the host of the very popular CBC Radio One program Q. It's described as a national arts magazine show, where Ghomeshi interviews prominent artists, entertainers, and cultural figures from across Canada and the world. This was an interview he did with Samantha and Jason five years ago:

When Bill Donohue and Cardinal Timothy Dolan make you look bad on gays participating in the St. Patrick's Day Parade, then Fox and Friends... will just continue to act ignorant and evil, just because they are. Any excuse to use a clip of Steve Carell is full of win.

I'm impressed Michael didn't call that disdainful pile of shit Jim Gilchrist a racist right in his face, because that's what he is. After watching that, I'm pretty certain he'll complain (to one of the Fox News dipshits) that what he said verbatimly was taken out of context. And that TDS are the real racists.

Joan Rivers just died. We'll probably see a MoZ tribute from Jon that he couldn't for Robin Williams.