True Stories: My Life in Retail

[kelslamu]

On 1/6/2017 at 10:15 AM, Keener said:

 

 

The internal theft alone could fill a whole season of this show. I'm surprised that they haven't touched on that yet (I'm looking at you, Sandra!) We had an associate manager steal a whole skid of playstations out the McDonald's receiving door. We had a shift manager steal cash right from cashiers' tills. We had cashiers strike deals with customers to "sweetheart" items for them. I still remember setting up for our Christmas party in the lumber run (yes, big box hardware stores have their holiday parties on buckets using plywood as tables-- I wish I was kidding) and watching a cashier get escorted out by police handcuffed. 

 

Working third shift, the managers watched customers wheel items out they didn't pay for without saying anything.  They said they weren't supposed to call the police at night.  However, let them think an employee didn't pay for a soda or something and they would fire them on the spot. lol  I always heard the cameras were more for the employees than the the customers.  I'll never forget them not calling the cops on customers basically robbing them blind.  

Had a couple come in that smelled of chemicals so bad that you could smell it across the store.  They left in an RV.  If they weren't breaking bad, I don't even want to know what made them smell like that.

Had a guy on one of those carts with a couple girls walking beside him come up with a joint in his mouth asking where the koolaid is located. 

I only worked there a year and a half, but 3rd shift can be incredibly odd, to say the least.

Edited December 30, 2018 by kelslamu

[rhys]

This is *by far* my favorite sub thread in this particular thread. I'm so sorry for you guys who worked retail. Please know that some of us here are enjoying (?) your stories & I for one hope to read lots more. You are a talented bunch of story tellers & I appreciate it.

[janie jones]

On 12/28/2018 at 10:09 AM, WAnglais1 said:

I worked in a record store in the mid-90s. My favorite was when a customer would come in looking for, "That song, it's kinda slow and has 'I love you' in the lyrics." That narrows it down.

That's like the people who come into my (clothing) store and ask if an item will fit their niece/nephew.  Well, I've never seen your nephew, so...  I actually respond to that with something along the line of "Having never met her, I can't say for sure, but..." Then sometimes they want to show you a picture of the person in question.  Unless they're next to a goddamn yardstick that isn't helpful.  I told someone once that I couldn't tell from the picture how big the niece was, but from the way he describes her, this is probably the right size.  So he finds another picture of her standing next to two other women.  "I don't know how tall those other women are so that doesn't help." 

On 12/28/2018 at 10:09 AM, WAnglais1 said:

One day a lovely young woman came in to the store. She walked back to the fans and asked if a man could come back and help her get one. Our manager yelled, "We don't have a man. How about WAnglais1?" I gave him the side eye and started back to her.

I don't understand this part of the story.  Are you a man or a woman?

[WAnglais1]

2 minutes ago, janie jones said:

That's like the people who come into my (clothing) store and ask if an item will fit their niece/nephew.  Well, I've never seen your nephew, so...  I actually respond to that with something along the line of "Having never met her, I can't say for sure, but..." Then sometimes they want to show you a picture of the person in question.  Unless they're next to a goddamn yardstick that isn't helpful.  I told someone once that I couldn't tell from the picture how big the niece was, but from the way he describes her, this is probably the right size.  So he finds another picture of her standing next to two other women.  "I don't know how tall those other women are so that doesn't help." 

I don't understand this part of the story.  Are you a man or a woman?

I'm a guy. So, by saying they didn't have a man, would a boy be okay? I guess because by this time in my life I hadn't dated that much, or "been with anyone," so people I worked with thought it was funny when I would get flustered around someone of the opposite sex.

[janie jones]

Gotcha. I wasn't sure if the manager was saying there wasn't a man, so maybe this mannish lady here will suffice.

[methodwriter85]

On 12/30/2018 at 5:20 AM, kelslamu said:

If I ever hear Simple Man by Shinedown again it will be entirely too soon.

For me, it's "Mistletoe" by Justin Bieber and "Diamonds in the Sun" by Rihanna.

[Kip Hackman]

A customer retail story.

A couple of weeks ago, I'm in the self-checkout section at Wal-mart. Struggling to get the price gun to hit the upc on the box of cat litter.

One of the employees walks up to me, pushes the cart closer to the scanner, and says "You need to bring your work closer to you."

My work. Took a second for that to sink in. Screw self-checkout. I'm done working at Wal-mart.

[fishcakes]

I don't use self checkout mainly because it never seems to work right and you stand there for ages waiting for a manager to come over and scan their badge to unfreeze the scanner after it locks up for who knows what reason. At some point, I'm sure there will only be self checkout, and I don't look forward to that. I don't even like those conveyor belts that you unload your cart onto because the checker is halfway through before I'm even done unloading so I can't watch the screen as they're scanning, and regularly when I get home and look at the receipt I find errors, but it's not like I'm going to go back the following week and say I want my $2.19 back because I only bought one box of Fiddle Faddle, not two. There's a store I used to go that didn't have a conveyor belt and there was one checker who still refused to unload the cart; she'd just stand there and make you take each item out and hand it to her. If someone didn't know how lazy she was and wheeled their cart up expecting her to do her job, she'd actually start pointing to items in the cart and then slapping the little shelf next to the counter until the customer figured it out.

[MaryHedwig]

On 12/30/2018 at 4:20 AM, kelslamu said:

Worked third shift at 24 hour retail store (not walmart lol) .  Had a guy ask me at 2am for the location of the baby aisle.  This grown man had a pacifier on a ribbon around his neck and was wearing shorts.  You could see part of a diaper he was wearing hanging out of the shorts.  He told me he was on his way to a baby shower and forgot the gift.  I simply had no words for that one.  The music loop sucked soooo much.  If I ever hear Simple Man by Shinedown again it will be entirely too soon.

I know that guy!

[rhys]

I used to use self scan occasionally but never again after reading was stories here & at other sites. It just doesn't save time, money or sanity. P!us i have wondered if all this automation takes jobs away. I sound like Glenn.

[methodwriter85]

Our movie theater is now playing another "End World Hunger" commercial. This time, it's a group of children in a war-torn downtown that sing, but then slowly disappear until there's just one left.

This past Tuesday, I had a cafe customer who wasn't waiting in line throw an absolute hissyfit because I served someone that was correctly waiting in line. They kept yelling "That is so rude!" at me and I apparently got called racist to my manager, who talked to me after it. I didn't get in any trouble though because it was obvious how over-the-top the customer was.

Something similar happened a few months ago, although they got free nachos out of it.

Edited October 5, 2019 by methodwriter85