Bella August 3, 2014 Share August 3, 2014 In the thread for the final episode of Andi's season, @jordanpond wrote : starting with the hometowns, it becomes quite evident how much the show requires the lead to be a liar, even if he/she went into the show with the best intentions. Probably on most seasons, during the hometowns, the lead is flat-out-lying to at least two of the families who have welcomed the lead into their home. I dislike the concept of taking up to three people to the fantasy suites, and I don't know what I find more objectionable :the way Chris Harrison uses salacious wording and generally goes out of his way to imply that something sexual goes on, or his complete about face -- when it suits him -- to chide contestants who don't seem to treat this time as private. And even if you think that Nick was faking all or some of his devastation (I happen to believe him) you know that the F2s of at least some seasons are completely blindsided and heartbroken.By the way, whether you are like me and dislike the practice of a man asking a father for his daughter's hand, or disagree with me and find this a nice and traditional gesture, I offer that there is likely agreement on both sides of the topic that this show makes a complete mockery of the practice For two men to ask for the bachelorette's hand is silly. And on Bachelor seasons it is downright ridiculous to see the lead ask four (!) fathers for their respective daughter's hand.Although I think Andi went really too far in her deception, I think it is only fair to acknowledge that there were probably other leads who engaged in similarly excessive "leading-on" of their F2 (and perhaps even F3), but who, unlike Andi, never had the extent of the deception revealed in such a public way.But even those who don't take it nearly as far are really put in a "no win" position according to the rules of the show: either you look undecided up to the end and make your bond with the F1 seem very weak, or affirm that you knew quite a long time who your F1 would be, and thus look like a manipulative liar.Sure, nobody has to agree to be the lead in the show, and I think they do need to be accountable for their choices. But the fact that the show, by its very format, forces the lead into a no-win situation in which they look bad either way is something that Chris Harrison never seems to acknowledge. In some seasons he treats the spurned contestants as stalkers if that suits him, in others (as with Juan Pablo) it suited him to point out what a cad JP was, presumably to make the other bachelors and the whole "process" of the franchise look good by comparison.I guess in some seasons in which the leads and contestants are more quiet/circumspect in their discussions, it's easier to focus on the fun parts of the show. But this season made it impossible to ignore how much the format guarantees that someone will look bad, and how much the show's producers seem to wash their hands of their very big part in all of it. So ... I've been watching this show for a number of years, and I agree with Jordanpond that this is the situation every season. Do others agree? Whether or not you agree, who, among all the Bachelors and Bachelorettes, do you think handled the situation the best? And why? What would you like to see the lead do, given the format of the show? I'm just really curious about what other people think here. I don't have strong opinions myself, but obviously a lot of posters do, and I guess my basic question is what would make you happiest in terms of the lead and the final few contestants? Link to comment
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