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Maximum Taco

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  1. My problem with all of them isn't really the time it took, it's that they were undone at all. When Rey destroyed the transport that was (supposedly) carrying Chewie, it meant something. I felt something, and then it was taken away, it was like the movie saying "No you were wrong for feeling that." Then they try and have a false moment of sacrifice for C-3P0, he's supposed to be making this huge sacrifice. "I'm taking one last look at my friends." That was one of the few moments of poignancy in this movie, and then it turns out the sacrifice he made was really just losing a few days. It was the droid equivalent of "R2! I had the most peculiar dream!" These fake outs are sometimes well done. They make you feel scared for the character and then relieved that they are ok. But doing it over and over cheapens each one. When Rey died I had no illusions she would stay dead. Because the story up to that point had no consequences. The same with when Finn stayed behind on the Star Detroyer to finish destroying it.
  2. I don't really see what the EU has to do with it. I didn't really bring up any EU examples, and I'm personally not really invested in the EU at all. I've watched the Mandalorian if that counts I guess.
  3. I'm not properly engaged because the story lacks logical consistency and gravity. If you invalidate every criticism with "Go write your own story then!" then every movie, book and tv show is the same amount of good and bad. I guess if we're exchanging Jedi wisdom Obi-Wan would tell you to not let my disappointment factor into your enjoyment. After all many of the truths we cling to depend greatly on our own point of view. Personally I'm glad you (and anyone else) enjoyed the movie, I don't wish disappointment on anyone, but I didn't enjoy it for the reasons stated.
  4. I can extrapolate, if that extrapolation is a logical leap. In my opinion this isn't. There's too many steps. You say someone picked him up and got him the medical care he needed. Ok who? And how did they get him this medical care? And why did they keep it a secret? The Empire collapsed largely because there was no leadership. Wouldn't it have made more sense to say the Emperor is alive and well, as he recovered? He created a fleet of Star Destroyers. Ok how? He used the Force. Ok, if he could use the Force to create a fleet of Star Destroyers all with the power of a Death Star, why didn't he do that before? At a certain point I'm not watching a movie anymore, I'm making up my own movie in my head. I can do that, but that's not why I go to the movies, that's why I run a pen and paper RPG game.
  5. Anakin survived Mustafar with the help of Darth Sidious and extensive surgery from the finest doctors of the Republic. Luke survived Bespin because HE contacted Leia and she came back for him. Both of these survivals were explained IN MOVIE, and not only that they were explained in the SAME MOVIE that the trauma happened in. Also neither of these people survived and then decided to lay low for 30 years biding their time on a plan that made no sense. Asking me to fill in the plotholes is lazy storytelling. Sci-Fi and Fantasy isn't an explanation or an excuse for lazy storytelling.
  6. It was just awful. This is probably the worst Star Wars movie, yes worse then the prequels, yes worse then The Last Jedi. 1) This movie makes no sense. - How did Palpatine survive? All we get is a stupid quote from Episode III; That's not an explanation. Also how did he make it to Sith Planet and keep his existence a secret? Also how did he mass a freaking ARMADA and keep it a secret? Also why would he wait THIRTY GODDAMN YEARS before springing his final trap? How the hell does that make any sense? He didn't need Rey to trigger the Final Order he seemingly could've done it at any time, and if his real end goal was finding/killing one girl, it would be a lot easier to do that at the head of the Empire. Saying "The Force" is not a catch all explanation in Star Wars, it's lazy and stupid and makes no sense. - Speaking of that what the hell is the Force even anymore? I understand the need to invent new uses, but it's just too much too quickly at this point. It can teleport people and objects now? Since when is the Force this powerful? Also why is it Rey can seemingly heal anyone from any harm no matter how dire, but when Ben tries to it kills him? Also why does Ben become one with the Force when Rey didn't? - Why are the Lightsabers buried at Lars Homestead? Luke couldn't wait to leave Tattooine, Leia was there for all of a few days in ROTJ. This place has little significance to Luke, and almost none to Leia. - So Lando went with Luke to desert planet 3, and then decided to stay there forever? WHY?! Oh for the love of god why!? Why wouldn't Leia have gone looking for him sooner? He just needed to hear from Rey that he should go back? - Why is Palpatine still making more Snokes? What purpose does this serve? 2) This movie is perhaps the best example I've ever seen of a lack of gravity. There are absolutely 0 consequences. The whole movie is just one large fake out. - Rey is supposed to 'earn' Luke's lightsaber, but she never really does, Leia just gives it to her cause she needs it and it's stupid to not give it to her, and then she gets Leia's lightsaber too. And then she gets a third lightsaber, without even showing how. How did she earn any of this? - Chewie's dead! Oh wait no he's not. - 3P0's gone! Oh wait he's exactly the same but with amnesia. Oh wait now he's exactly the same as he always was. - Rey's dea-- Oh goddamn it. Why should I feel anything when it's just going to be undone seconds later? All these emotional moments are just stolen when they are reversed, or revealed to be fake outs. 3) This movie makes no sense and has no gravity on it's own, but even worse it just invalidates all of the movies that came before it and steals their gravity. - If Palpatine survived, what is the point of the story of Anakin Skywalker? He's supposed to bring balance to the Force but he never actually did, unless we're supposed to believe he did because Luke is his son who trained Rey who starred in the movie that insanity built. - If the Emperor could use the Force to seemingly single handedly build an Armada of ships with Death Star tech why would he bother with extreme subterfuge in the Senate and a secret manufactured war to seize power in the PT and why would he painstakingly use man power to build not one but TWO Death Stars during the OT? - Poe's backstory had established his parents as being Rebels, and him as following in their example. It's a great backstory, why did we change that to making him a drug smuggler? The only reason I can see to do this is to make him more like Han Solo. Han Solo is Han Solo, let Poe Dameron be Poe Dameron. - Wasn't it supposed to be an important story how Maz got Luke's lightsaber? - TLJ's big point was that greatness can come from anywhere, but really that's not the case, either you're Force Royalty or you're garbage in this universe according to ROS. I knew this movie was going to be terrible as soon as the opening scrawl began with 'THE DEAD SPEAK!" but nothing could've prepared me for how truly wretched it was.
  7. It's never really expanded upon if Yoda's speech pattern is a species trait, or is just something he does. The only other adult member of Yoda's species we ever see is Jedi Master Yaddle in The Phantom Menace, and she has no canon lines in any medium, in some of the decanonized Legends material she is shown to speak in a similar pattern to Yoda though. Some have posited that Yoda's syntax is a biological feature of his species' brain, he simply thinks that way due to his physiology/brain chemistry, if that's the case then Baby Yoda, when he does learn to speak, would exhibit the same speech patterns. We probably learned he was a very strong force user in episode 2, picking up a mudhorn would be a difficult task for most younglings, although most Jedi could handle it easily. It's no X-Wing out of Dagobah's swamp, but it's still impressive for a being who hasn't yet mastered speech. Using certain Force powers does not necessarily brand one good or evil or light side or dark side. Force Choke/Grip is generally seen as an evil thing to do because it results in a painful and terrifying death for someone. The same way with Force Lightning, it is a cruel and painful way to go about fighting or killing. Count Dooku, once used Force Lightning to save his Padawan Qui-Gon Jinn, but he didn't immediately fall to the dark side. It took time. It's a slippery slope, you use a power once, and nothing seems to happen, but then you start using it more and more until it becomes common place. Once you start down the dark path forever will it dominate your destiny...
  8. And she's not even being halfway believable. I mean she wants Aunt Cricket to believe that she BY HERSELF (maybe with Toni's help?) dismembered a man who probably weighs close to 200 lbs and then cooked him into 2-5 pies? That's absolutely moronic. It would take like 400 single serving pies to use up all the meat, and what did you do with the bones Cheryl? And what did you do with the offal? And what did you do with the blood? You can't just drop an entire animal (or human I guess) into a meat grinder and just churn it up. A child might fall for this, but any adult person would call her out on her absolutely ridiculous lunacy.
  9. I don't think there are any rules about what they can or cannot do. The test subjects get points just like they would on earth, and they get no points if their motivation is corrupt. It doesn't really matter if (they think) they are in the Good Place or the Bad Place, either way (they think) their soul has been judged, and it shouldn't negate their point total because someone who thinks they have already been judged would do good actions out of pure altruism and bad actions out of pure selfishness. The only way the experiment falls apart is if the subjects think the experiment is still going on, or they think they can change the outcome. It's a smart move honestly. Their motivations would be corrupt if A) They thought they were in a test to get into the Best Place, like Brent does OR B) They think that this is an experiment, like Simone does. They only way to shift them back into a system where actions matter in terms of point accumulation is to make them think they have already passed or failed the test. Then a heartfelt apology like the one Brent is (seemingly) about to offer at the end of this episode would count. He's not apologizing for any reason other then the fact that he is genuinely sorry.
  10. Although it does make her storyline this week make a whole lot more sense. After 300+ reboots of her planning parties, it would make sense that Tahani is a little concerned that it's all she seems to be good at.
  11. Nobody selecting their football team based on logic and statistics would pick the Jacksonville Jaguars.
  12. Maximum Taco

    The NBA

    Kawhi broke the league's psyche. Now everyone in the West who thought they had a chance last year and was like "We'll just run it back!" is going insane. Ok Denver, you're next up for a move that no one sees coming. Why wouldn't Presti make this deal? He ditched one of the biggest albatross contracts in the league for a smaller one, and pocketed 2 1st rounders and 2 pick swaps. And now he's probably going to move CP3 to the Heat, since they struck out on Westbrook. Sam Presti has taken PG's trade request and somehow orchestrated a full rebuild in a single off season. He's got 15 1st rounders in the next 7 years, and a bunch of pick swaps too. I know he won't because it's usually reserved for a GM who creates a competitive team but he should probably win Exec of the Year based on this off season. MasterClass in rebuilding.
  13. Maximum Taco

    MLB Thread

    Damn! Vladdy dropped the 40 spot. Never thought I'd see that in a derby, even with tie breakers.
  14. Maximum Taco

    The NBA

    More stuff leaking about the Leonard free agent meetings. Apparently Kawhi's camp asked Toronto to trade for Paul George and Bradley Beal, but the Raptors brass didn't believe it was a serious request as Kawhi continued to escalate his demands, and it was apparent Kawhi was always focused on a return to LA. No short term deals were discussed (and really only a short term deal would've made sense for both the Raptors and Kawhi.) The ask around George was reigning MIP Pascal Siakam, FMVP "runner up" Fred Van Vleet, 4 unprotected first rounders, and (for salary matching reasons) almost certainly one of Kyle Lowry, Serge Ibaka or Marc Gasol. Talks never got beyond preliminary because the Raptors didn't have a firm commitment from Kawhi that he would sign if George was acquired and also because the Raptors felt that these were not serious talks and OKC was only using them as leverage to bleed the Clippers dry, which they did. It might be crazy but it feels like Kawhi was using the Raptors to try and bait the Clippers into making an offer for George that OKC couldn't refuse. Also apparently Kawhi was meeting with George on the same day he was meeting with the Lakers FO. And 2 hours before he actually announced that he was going to the Clippers, he asked the Lakers to delay the AD trade until Saturday/Sunday. Again, it might seem crazy, but it really feels like Kawhi was trying to sabotage the Lakers, and only announced his decision once it was clear the Lakers were going through with the AD trade on schedule. The Drama. Gotta love NBA free agency. I'm pretty happy Masai didn't even consider that deal though, doesn't make any sense to move on George and gut the franchise if Kawhi wasn't willing to make a firm commitment. Not sure if I'm reading too much into Kawhi's actions, but he might just be a 4D Chess playing evil genius.
  15. Maximum Taco

    The NBA

    Wow. In the end Kawhi found a way to A) Go Home to California B) Be "the guy" on a team C) Join a team with the best chance to win a championship. They were saying he had to choose between his best chance at winning, and taking a back seat on LeBron's team or joining an inferior team and being their first option and he said "Screw that". Respect man, mad respect. I'm not all that surprised in the end (I mean I'm surprised it worked out this way, but I'm not surprised he left Toronto.) and I can't say I'm not disappointed, I was really hoping he'd stay in Toronto with my Raptors, and it really seemed possible (if not especially likely), especially after he flew into Toronto to take his final meeting with Masai. I'll also say that it is still a pretty satisfying story to have a stranger come to town, change everything and then, as mysteriously as he arrived, he was gone. Thanks for the memories Kawhi. No hard feelings here. Good luck in LA. Apple time, Apple time.
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