SourK

Yeah, if occurs to me that, in season one, Hannah was presented as a specific individual that June had a relationship with and, since then, she's sort of become a plot point that you can pick up and put in the room to move June's story along. It would have made more sense if they'd had a two-way mirror and brought Hannah in to do something innocuous that wouldn't scare her, and let June see through the mirror that they had her. That would have probably been enough.

I think Fred and Serena are in some kind of political limbo. They're in Canada, but they're not really under arrest by Canada, they're under arrest by the United States, and they haven't been extradited yet, so they're sort of being held in custody pending whatever happens next, but they're not in jail. Also, I think the show wants to prolong their stay in Canada to keep them close to the other characters, so the limbo will go on for a while. That is my un-knowledgeable interpretation of why they're being held in a nice-ish conference centre.

One thing I liked about this episode, even though the circumstances are horrible, is that the relationship between June and Janine changed a little bit. It starts off with June thinking Janine's dead weight and believing she's the older sister in the relationship, making all the sacrifices, keeping them both alive, and then, at the low point, when she can't make herself do the awful thing she has to do to save them, Janine does it instead -- so, now they're surviving together. I also like that the show didn't just bundle all of the characters up and send them to a colony to repeat the exact same story. We're at least seeing something new. Yeah, I though that was weird, too. Like, literally after everybody died on June's watch. One thing I didn't like about this episode is that June was super mean for no real reason. I have zero read on her character anymore. It just doesn't track for me, and I don't understand what they're trying to portray with her.

One thing I kept thinking this episode was that there's a case to be made that it's psychologically easier to deal with Gilead if you're already an enemy of the state and there's no ambiguity about what's going to happen to you if you get captured. In some ways, that feels less stressful than the dance they have to do when they're trying to believe they can survive and not get hurt. However, I also felt like they could have deleted the whole sequence where June got captured and just had the army find them all at Esther's farm, and then let them get killed by the train, and we'd be in the same place. I don't feel like the torture sequence taught us anything we didn't already know or changed the characters -- except maybe Lydia, during that hilarious scene where June was like, "I'm not trapped in here with you, YOU'RE TRAPPED IN HERE WITH ME!!"... but that remains to be seen. I briefly thought that that would be a good lie to tell. If June's super secret boyfriend let her know that no one was on Esther's farm anymore, I'd expect the first thing she said to be "They're at Esther's farm," because then everybody knows that's true, but it doesn't help them, and it's easier to pretend she doesn't know where they went after that. However, I guess it would have taken away the option to lie and say they went somewhere else, which she tried a few scenes later. Also imagine how badass it would be (of the show) if June was placed in the moral dilemma of having to kill the Marthas or betray the Handmaids and then she did a Buffy Summers and realized the third option was to jump off the roof and kill herself (um... spoilers for Buffy). June would be a hero, everyone would be justified in continuously talking about how great she was, and the other characters could pick up the torch and have interesting story lines... Oh well. I don't like Nick, I don't trust Nick, and I still believe Nick is the one who messed up June's escape attempt in season two. I also dislike this thing where he was retroactively made a super influential person in the military so that he can get away with popping up wherever it's convenient, and everyone just turns a blind eye to him making out with the fugitive.

I'm sure that this is part of it. I strongly suspect the meta reason Janine has an eye patch is so they don't have to keep doing makeup on her eye. The show also backed itself into a weird corner, though. The source material is hella depressing because Gilead is a hopeless place where people get tortured and murdered and the state has full, oppressive control over the population. It ends on a pretty down note. If you want to spin that into a long-running TV show, people are not going to want to watch a never-ending string of human rights violations that make them feel scared and upset -- and it's sort of irresponsible to ask them to. What would be the point of it? You'd just be bumming everyone out. So, because they wanted this to continue beyond the source material, they automatically had to give us something or someone to root for, and break up the horrible scenes with something hopeful or positive. I also think that, because things got really scary in the USA while the show was airing, that might have also pushed them in the direction of saying, "We need a hopeful message about how you can resist and fight back -- it's not okay to tell people they should just give up because the fascists are going to destroy them." When you couple that with the practical consideration that the show is built around Elisabeth Moss, and that the producers would be afraid to change the set-up where the character the audience has bonded with is the center of the story, we end up with June the revolutionary. Which is a character who shouldn't be able to exist in the universe this story is set in. But TV is weird.

Okay, so, in two episodes, the story has pivoted back to June being captured again. I'm still super suspicious of the psychopath child and her pantry full of poison, but she may be less important, now. I hated that Rita got the chance to speak about what happened and literally all she talked about was how much we should all admire June. I had this weird moment where I almost thought Rita had never been outside Gilead before, but then I was like, "No, she's old enough that she lived through the takeover. She had a life before that -- who was she? How is she reacting to this?" And then all she did was talk about June and cook a meal. I don't think the man who loved her was ever really there, and I find the way they're exploring that interesting. I think what Serena's learning about Fred is that he was nice to her when he felt powerless, but as soon as he didn't "have to" be nice anymore, he became an abusive asshole (the detail where she doesn't want to call it abuse yet is really realistic). She told herself it was Gilead that made him that way, but that's just how Fred is. It's how he always was, and it's how he's always going to be unless he stops believing he has the right to control other people. I'm actually interested to see where this pregnancy story line goes. I wouldn't actually be shocked if she got an abortion. When June was talking about how Not All Men are made of garbage, the guardian who was helping them was one of the first people I thought of. And then, he wouldn't leave her when they walked into an obvious trap. And he got unceremoniously murdered, but we're supposed to be relieved because June survived. :(

So, now this is Dexter season five, with an adult psychopath raising someone who is spiritually their psychopath child. Okay. As others have said, I still don't love the thing where June's a folk hero. I also didn't love that someone went way far out of their way to tell Serena and Fred about June's brave deeds just so we could watch them be shocked. It seems weird that everyone would be so focused on June, personally, rather than the larger situation. I generally believe you should default to believing people who say they were sexually assaulted and, no matter what else happened, obviously Esther was forced to marry some old dude when she shouldn't have been, so the whole situation is wrong. However, I'm taking a wait-and-see approach on the details of what the child psychopath says. Same. That was hilariously messed-up. If you believe this is a traumatized child, don't encourage her to murder someone and then carry the memory of that for the rest of her life. And then, if you do encourage her to do that, don't be like, "Make me proud!" and saunter off to have a cool drink or whatever. At least stick around to be supportive.

LMAO. WHAT IF the school were suddenly flooded by violent criminals who apparently came there to steal people's wallets in the middle of the night? WHAT IF the only way to stop them was the hand-to-hand combat training of a teacher who may or may not still be in the army -- it's unclear? WHAT IF everyone gathered around at exactly the right moment to listen to him give a speech about how he's the most moral person 2-3 times? Then your violent daydream about masculine heroics would be an episode of Riverdale, I guess. Honestly, my favourite part was when Chic got mad about not being included in the murder family. Second favourite was the cut back to Jughead doing mushrooms in the bunker while the town was under attack. I feel like I would like him more if he were whimsically disconnected from everything instead of being self-serious. ETA: I also loved it when Archie asked his uncle how things were in prison, and his uncle said they were bad and weird, and then Archie was like, "Cool, good luck with that. I have to go."

My favourite part was when Hiram called the Bulldogs garbage. I think there should be a scene in every episode where he just bags on people. Otherwise, I genuinely felt happy for that one girl when she scored a point, and I liked that the kid who changed schools was still a good person afterward. It feels like the teens in this town are now somewhat normal and rootable, and it's just the adults who are crazy. Case in point, Archie becoming that one teacher who only cares about the extracurricular he coaches, to the point that he goes on the PA and tells everyone off for not supporting it enough. Or Veronica constantly using money to solve every problem every person has, and micromanaging the team, and then also somehow not knowing the team was part of a league. Honestly, I was kind of disappointed, too. Partly because I feel like they keep trying to sell us on Betty's darkness, but... then she doesn't do anything.

I had the same hopes. It occurs to me now that we've all been complaining the whole time about how the adult characters on this show act like they have the emotional maturity of teenagers and run around doing dumb things... so I guess we shouldn't be surprised that, now that the main characters are also adults, they are exactly the same way. The part I hated most was that the show just glossed over all the pressure people were under to ignore any boundaries they had and/or the boundaries of their partners. Like, I know that no one on Riverdale knows how to do anything the way you do it in real life, but, if you're going to have a swingers party, at the very least, the people there need to want to participate. As a side note, I forgot to say this, but I'm so glad Toni's baby isn't an alien.

There came a point during the horrible key party where I was like, "You know what? I believe this is who they all grew up to be." And I don't know how I feel about that. Happy for Cheryl that she found someone evil and eccentric to be with. I think there's potential in that, especially if she becomes a villain this season. LOL at the fight between Kevin and Fangs where Kevin said he wasn't ready to get married and Fangs was like, "Why? Because you don't want to give up trawling for sex in the woods? Then don't give it up!" I love that that was his first guess.

I'm so embarrassed, and I don't even go to that school. Imagine if you were just trying to do cheer, and the weird woman who doesn't leave her mansion showed up and tried to prove she was the best dancer. And then, a few days after your ROTC instructor forced you to join his football team, he had you working as the fire department. And then your economics teacher printed money with her face on it and paid you with it in exchange for helping her turn an adult video store into a jewelry shop. And then, randomly, your other teacher who works at the diner and doesn't come to school anymore got abducted by aliens. I stand by my theory that Hiram's doing the whole world a solid by wiping this town off the map.

Cool, so the donation Cheryl made to the school was a one-time thing, and they're not charging tuition. That's a solid plan that's gonna turn out really well. I thought it was so cute that they split a Subway meal deal together, and then Hiram held up the Doritos bag for product placement and I LOL'd.

Well, returning to evil did cure his mystery disease, so... I love how everyone's acting like it's such a normal PTO request to make, too. Like, "Hey, I went home for the weekend and it turned out my town was disincorperated, so now I'm a teacher. Should I use my vacation or take emergency leave?" Actually, as I type that, I want Riverdale to have one of those credit sequences that explains the premise of the series. And that is the premise it explains.

New fan theory: Hiram Lodge is the hero of this story, bravely trying to destroy the evil town of Riverdale before it ruins more lives. The town council meeting reminded me of everything I hate about this town, and everything I hate about this show. Namely, that it seems like it's written by one of those algorithms that generates plot points based on narrative conventions without understanding the meaning behind them. Like... you can't just stand up and say, "We declare ourselves a private school." I like it in theory, but I wish that they hadn't basically repeated the same shower scene he had with Veronica. Betty and Archie's relationship has a different vibe, and I wish they'd gotten a scene that was more personal and specific to that. I tentatively like Jughead with Pop Tate's granddaughter. I tentatively predict this means Veronica gets back together with Reggie.

The dream sequence with Archie was an A+ solution to the problem of how to convey his time in the army without investing a bunch of time and resources in something that won't matter. I was still on board by the time Betty was doing the Clarice Starling run through the forest. But then they invented the Trash Bag Killer, and this show hit that old stumbling block of sending mixed signals about how seriously we're supposed to take the story, and it lost me. Also, I felt like watching her fail to catch the serial killer would have been more interesting and emotional than whatever we're going to see, now. It was a nice surprise that they didn't kill Pop. I also LOL'd when Toni took over Veronica's old hobby of making everybody watch her perform cabaret for no reason. As a writer, Jughead's story continues to infuriate me, since he's constantly showered with riches, attention, and opportunities that most of us could only dream of -- and all he does is complain and slack off. I get that they're trying to show us that Veronica made a mistake and ended up in her parents' marriage, but I think it would be so much more interesting if she were still on Wall Street, and she still liked this guy. Because, right now, this is obviously a throw-away life that she doesn't even want, so there's no tension about whether she'll keep it. Same with Betty -- I wish that she still liked the guy she's dating. It seems pointless to even include him when she doesn't. Given how this show sits outside of normal time, I think it would be cool if it became a melting pot for different historical figures or famous characters to drift through the story. You know, if this show were interested in giving commentary on stuff.

I'm stoked and impatient for the time jump, so glad we're finally there. This episode was pretty decent by Riverdale standards, but still funny in the way I enjoy. "Archie, you have to repeat senior year, but can you please record a cover of a Green Day song for graduation?" Betty is somehow valedictorian. Archie gives an emotional speech about how he's joining the army because he can get his "high school degree" that way. FP dumps Jughead as soon as he turns 18, and leaves him to sleep in an abandoned house. Alice is also apparently okay with this, even though Jughead's been living with her as her step-son up until now. Veronica gives the diner back to Pop because she's done playing with it, now. I liked how the previous generation left things that might be interesting to the current generation, but then these guys left a bunch of stuff that's personal to them and won't mean anything in 70 years. I also liked how Cheryl and Toni used gloves to handle the historical artifacts, and then left them on a table where anyone can touch them with their finger oils. Yeah, I thought that was funny. He kept it a secret so it wouldn't blow up Jughead and Betty's relationship, right up until the moment he was leaving town and it wouldn't affect him anymore, and then he was like, "Hey, I have to tell you something..."

In my heart, I feel like there could have been a five minute montage where Jughead just explained everything we've seen in these past two episodes to us, and it would be even funnier if he was just describing it. My favourite part was when Hiram tried to tell Veronica that returning to evil had healed him and my second favourite part was when Archie destroyed the video tape and then also, for no reason, destroyed the TV. And then my third favourite part is that they're still determined to be arch enemies even though that plot line's tired and played out. That's the real star-crossed romance of this series -- Archie and Veronica's dad trying to hate each other, no matter the circumstances.

IIRC, Principal Honey's main thing was that he wanted to stop the trend where school dances involve a murder, and then they ran him off, and now the school dance involved a murder. I enjoyed how a) the shop clerk just casually said he was throwing a rave to watch his illegal movies at, b) there are tons of people in the town who apparently know about and are okay with this, and c) Jellybean claimed that she came there with friends, and Jughead either knew those characters didn't exist, or didn't care, because they left right away. Last season, I thought Hermione was gaslighting him into thinking he was sick so he would sign his stuff over to his evil daughter (the one that's not Veronica). Now, I sort of believe the writers just got tired of his mystery illness and let him heal himself by punching. I don't know which I prefer. They all went home and cried, but not because they saw someone get murdered again. Unironically, I really liked the set-up where Veronica sang the song without knowing it was literally about Archie trying to ditch her for someone else, because it was so painful and awkward. I also liked how he kept evading her questions and making noncommittal noises, etc. I think it would have worked better if she'd noticed something was wrong and pressed him about it rather than having him just blurt it out, but this was the one part of the episode I thought was kind of good. The boxing thing was dumb, but I feel conflicted about it. Archie being a poor sport and burning all his bridges felt like a really realistic thing for a teenager to do -- I'm not sure it felt like a realistic thing for him to do, specifically. I also wish this show would make up its mind about whether he wants to be in the military or not. And then the best/worst idea would be for him to team up with the villain who wants to destroy him again. I kind of hope he does it, because Archie being stupid is one of the things I like to make fun of the most. They suddenly gave her an ambition to be the Serpent Queen and re-introduced the story about how the Serpents hate the town or whatever, so maybe they're giving her a plot line? I'm mildly worried that, when we flash forward, she's going to be this series' Weevil, but we'll see.

Same. I think shows aimed at teens usually follow a rule where they try to make the characters seem a little older than the target audience, because that's part of the fantasy, so it's not totally unusual for high school characters to act like they're in college, but there were several times this season when I was like, "This feels like the relationship you have at 23, not 17." On the other hand, the set they made for Harvey's room was really nice. Like, nice decorating, nice lighting, they set up nice angles to film it from... I don't blame them for wanting to keep putting scenes there. One thing I didn't like about the Two Sabrinas plot line is that, as of this season, it was always super clear that we only needed to care about Sabrina Spellman, because she was the real, real Sabrina, and the other one was extra. It feels like that shouldn't be the case. Not to drag obscure sci-fi shows into it, but one of the coolest things about Farscape was a story arc where the main character got cloned, and then the show treated both of them as being 100% the main character until one of them died. That made the stakes feel a lot higher, and the death hurt a lot more. I did notice that, and I don't know what it means, except maybe an Easter egg for us?

It felt a little bit Good Place-like to me, but I was somewhat okay with it up until the random ending where Sabrina dies and then Nick kills himself to be with her and the show is just... cool with that? Also I thought the point of getting Sabrina's other body was that they had some way to save her by switching bodies again, but I guess they just wanted the box. Low key, my favourite part was when Ambrose tried to cast on Father Blackwood, and it didn't work, and Prudence looked at him doing that for a full second, and then just seamlessly kept talking like he wasn't even there.

This was my favourite of the season. I thought it was a weird joke when Sabrina went through the mirror and ended up in the 90s show, and it felt like it didn't match the tone, but this episode redeemed it with some weird Black Mirror, Twilight Zone, self-referential meta horror. Totally my jam. Though I am confused about what happened to the Endless when Sabrina carried him through the mirror with her. Did he turn into a puppet?

I 100% did not believe Lilith really killed her son, so colour me surprised. Also, I kind of ship her with Caliban, now. ETA: I forgot, but I found it unpleasant and strange that all of Sabrina's dads now hate her. What was that about?

For a second, when she killed her dad, I was like, "Yay, Prudence finally got something she wants!" And then the next scene reminded us that he can't die and she had to settle for cutting off his head. Unluck. I kind of laughed when Blackwood was like, "Make it so I've always been the Emperor!" because that's such a weird wish. Emperor of what? Emperor of Greendale? His wish is to make it so the town randomly has an Emperor and it's him? I also laughed when he described this as his perfect world, because he set the bar so low. His fantasy of a perfect world is to stomp around the high school arresting students he doesn't like. Meanwhile, I can buy the story line where Roz is super committed to proving that Harvey doesn't have it in him to be a Nazi, but not over the course of a single episode where it gets shoehorned in with everything else. In this episode, you just make him drink the soup and move on with your life.

Man, I sure hope that, when my day comes to get murdered, the murderer decides that leaving me to live my life is a worse punishment. It feels like there's a 50% chance that's what happens. Meanwhile, if I have one complaint, it's that we never got to know Hell Sabrina, so it didn't feel super surprising or impactful that she was the Sabrina they got rid of. It would have been more interesting to me if they'd thrown Earth Sabrina through the mirror instead.