MrsWitter

Have you considered texting her a Tyler Perry quote (à la Dorinda to Lu)? Something along the lines of: ”I’m just enjoying my life. I suggest you try it.” (Tyler Perry)

I completely agree. This is par for the course with Mary. Beyond all the money stealing, Mary is constantly degrading congregants (per the leaked audio of some of her “sermons”) and seems to have no empathy for any of her supposed “flock.” These poor people don’t need a tv to hear Mary’s flippancy- I’d imagine she’s been speaking the same way to them for years right to their faces.

Mary is a weird duck. But it was oddly reassuring to hear about a car accident on Bravo where there was no mention of any of the following: switchbacks, TBIs, broken ankles, twelve hours of unconsciousness, mistresses, five rollovers (count ‘em as they happen!), snow in Southern California, exploding cataracts, etc. And Mary is right- wear a seatbelt (unless you’re somehow related to RHOBH’s Erika G./J., which confers on you a special protection in such accidents)! I survived a pretty bad rollover accident relatively unscathed and it was largely due to my seatbelt.

I was about to suggest a storyline where Whit introduces “cold yoga” to the world, but then found out it’s already a thing: https://www.healthline.com/health-news/is-cold-yoga-the-next-exercise-craze#What-about-hot-yoga? Maybe she introduces cold yoga to Greenville? The only problem is she doesn’t have a built-in excuse (“it’s so hot!”) to strip down, but she would definitely spend the whole class pointing out how hard her nipples are! I think the potential comedic value of fencing is also WAYYYY HIGH!

Less children. And apparently a far more humorous and charming husband (if we just look at this season).

And… Fuck Rinna.

I don’t really have much to add to the Erika discussion-you all have covered it so well (and with great wit, per usual)! But can we please revisit Dorit “Child of the World” Kemsley’s proclamation of how much she loves using heavy spices in her cooking, unlike MOST Americans…. Didn’t we just find out a couple of episodes ago that she doesn’t even like garlic? Bitch please. Also, Kyle: if you so strongly feel the urge to fix or “bandage” any conflict between your co-workers to soothe your discomfort, you should probably work that out in therapy. It’s a trauma response. Not everyone has to kiss and make up after a big fight (that you largely provoked) to make you feel at ease.

I got a bad vibe from Crystal at the beginning of the season. I initially chalked that up to my own preferences and triggers- interpersonally, I am usually not terribly fond of people who proudly self-describe as both “competitive” and “Type A” (I am neither). People who are socially competitive- as Crystal is with her declarations of knowing everyone who is important, etc.- just stress me out (even if those qualities often make for an entertaining HW). I had warmed to her slightly throughout the season and felt bad for her obvious distress over violategate (and thought Sutton was clearly in the wrong with her “I don’t see color” bit). That all said, I’m back where I was at the beginning. I’m not sure if she really believes so firmly in her own importance or if it’s a lot of mean girl posturing to cover up her insecurity, but her displayed sense of confidence is… overinflated (to put it mildly). It’s probably a good bet to never trust someone who is close with Teddi (see: Kyle).

Just as a clarification- a number of people have mentioned Erika apparently “investing” in the Rinna spawn’s fashion company. According to financial records released during the legal proceedings, Erika made a payment to DNA Inc, which is similar in name to the the fashion company the Hamlin girls worked with. It’s also the name of a now-defunct music video production company. I’m trying to understand Rinna’s ride or die devotion to Erika this season and I don’t doubt there could be some financial connections, but it doesn’t seem like this is one of them.

Paging Elle Woods!

When you don’t read (documents), the only places you go are prison or back to Shakers. #readingiscool

Ms. Accountability Coach can miss me with her impassioned “we don’t know, none of us know” speech. She filmed this in December 2020, after her All In program was dragged in a bunch of media outlets that Fall after former clients detailed the bullying and toxicity fundamental to her MLM-esque scheme. I’m no defender of Erika, but IMO, Teddi might be just as bad. She’s running a cultish scam where women pay her and her “coaches” to berate them into an eating disorder. And engaging in really shady financial practices to keep it going (like having clients for their services via the “friends and family” method on PayPal). I’m not saying Teddi’s crimes and Tom’s are the same, but Teddi is the leader and architect of her con, while Erika was a beneficiary of Tom’s. Time for the underfed little “gnat” to go away.

Maybe deadly for an average man, but certainly not for Superman/Supervillain/Brilliant Lawyer/Old Man Teetering on the Edge of Dementia/Husband who Shushes His Wife and Doesn’t Give Hugs/ Monopoly Man ( @WhatAmIWatching ) Tom Girardi!

Erika’s lawyers after watching this last episode:

I wonder if she will even show up for the reunion? I can’t imagine her lawyers want her *clarifying* these stories further. She’s opted out of WWHL thus far this season, citing legal issues.* The more she talks, the worse it seems to get (see: this episode)! ETA: It’s unclear whether Erika has actually cited “legal” reasons for not doing WWHL (I think that’s just the speculation). But she’s not doing any “press” (including WWHL) so I could see her opting out of the reunion…

Maybe Mikey helped? But instead of rappelling ropes, they knitted together all of Erika’s wigs and extensions! I mean, this one on its own would be a good start:

Done! He thanks you for all of the extra praise! ❤️ I missed Garcelle A LOT tonight. I can see her asking Erika very specific questions to try to clarify that cockamamie accident story: was he thrown from the car or did he just roll out? How did nobody in Pasadena see this wreck? He found his phone and called you after being unconscious for TWELVE HOURS?! Etc...

She dramatically complained about having to pick up another creature’s shit (first, Tom’s metaphorical shit, I assume, and now her dog’s literal shit), but they didn’t show her picking up the poop.* This woman really doesn’t know how to even begin to engender basic sympathy from the audience. Between complaining about her “small” (gorgeous!) house and bemoaning her dog’s poop... why would any of us feel sorry for her? I feel sorry for her dog (and maybe her son, since I’m sure she considered changing his poopy diapers a burden).

Thanks so much for the clarification @Persnickety1! You saved me from having to go back and rewatch that scene. And agreed- no affection. She seemed to only have annoyance that her dog dared to have a normal bodily function on her watch. Whereas, in our house, we still praise our senior mutt for pooping and peeing and eating and drinking and basically existing (a holdover from when we first adopted him ten years ago and he was in desperate need of confidence and praise). 😄

Maybe I misunderstood, but it seems like she brought her dog with her to La Quinta (have we ever seen her travel with her dog before?). And then complained about having to “pick up (his) shit too” and pulled on his collar a bit too aggressively for my taste. Yes Erika, regular people (and Housewives) have to pick up their dog’s poo. Now, if you pooped yourself (à la Ramona Singer), you might be able to get the “help” to handle it. 🙄 GIRLS. All three of them. I actually bought Adrienne’s act. I think she really might have thought you cleaned chicken with soap. I’m not buying the (recycled) Hilton rich dumb blonde schtick though… You bite your tongue! How dare you minimize her suffering? It’s only a 3,000 square foot house (edit: I just checked and it seems her rental is closer to 2,000 square feet. She’s in more dire straits than I realized) and that pool is expensive to heat! Imagine what she goes through at night! Look y’all- no smeared mascara!

Maybe Ramona borrowed LuAnn’s “bronzer” from Halloween 2017?

I can’t bear to go back and watch again to check, but does Leah actually eat ass? I thought she just expected men to eat her ass. I’m not sure how giving she is and it would be just like Leah to think her own ass (shit) doesn’t stink.

Is someone going to tell Leah that Coco was a Nazi sympathizer/agent? I’m not sure this bodes well for her conversion to Orthodox Judaism (which has just being going swimmingly thus far, I assume). I LOVE this for BOTH OF THEM! I know I’m probably driving some of you crazy with my repetitive PSA, but, on behalf of a horribly maligned “breed” of dog that suffers tremendously because of stigma: stop comparing noxious humans to pitbulls. We all know Sonja is never one to let a broken tooth interfere with her fun!

I wondered the same thing and then I thought maybe Bumble paid for the product placement/promotion on RHOBH?

Can you all help me out- did we know Dorit got another dog (Winnie)? Did I block this information out? Does she still have Winnie? Has anyone done a welfare check on Winnie? If she does still have Winnie, I hope she does something like chew up tragic items in Dorit’s closet…