CletusMusashi

It is not.

Who the fuck is this quiet. badass man in a hat, and what has he done with Coral?

Now I'm reminded of that old "Our Love's in Jeopardy" video...

Just kill FPP now please.

Oh, NOW you can waste bullets. But in the middle of a gunfight with cannibals you somehow couldn't? ETA: Beaten to it by Fliptopbox.

I still think Michonne is destined to end up with Father Pee Pants. I mean, think about it. She's a tough, awesome, badass swordswoman. And he's only two letters short of being named Gabrielle. Get him a staff, a blonde wig, and a little green sports bra, and they're good to go. Either that, or Beth will become Gabrielle, and FPP can be Joxer.

I marathon'd through the early episodes so quickly that I never picked up on that mass consciousness thing before. It not only makes them more interesting, but it also makes them scarier. Much harder to stay away from, for example, because while you're killing off one small group of them, the others are "seeing" you and moving in. Maybe as the mass consciousness grows, it gets better at immediately dominating the newly turned. So instead of thinking "I'm hungry for human flesh, but aren't those my friends..?" for the first few seconds, instead you go right into feeling the combined hunger of thousands of others.

Maybe that dark gunk that they're always drooling out is the infection agent. It's created out of melted skull tissue.

Even just a big metal tub that they can light a fire underneath. Or would that remind them too much of Gareth?

Rape is traumatic if the victim is Carl. His hat might fall off.

Wouldn't it be funny if they end up going into Grady with guns blazing, kicking doors down and throwing zombie heads at people, find Carol just when she's able to walk to the escape vehicle, go speeding off all triumphant... and completely forget Beth?

I predict that now that Glenn's group have a taste for fish, they will eat Eugene's mullet. Father Pee Pants will join GREATM and show them his stigmata wound. This will finally motivate Yosemite Sideboob to stand up, show his fist, and say "Mine's bigger." Maggie and Glenn will decide to have a baby (don't worry; the way time moves in that universe, the kid'll be 30 years old next season,) but Maggie will turn out to be infertile. So Tara will agree to let Glenn inseminate her. She will then change her name to Yoyo Ma. The entire group will get captured, but will discover that, with Rapypants Gordon no longer in power, life at Grady is actually a step up. They have food, medicine, plumbing, electricity, and all they really have to do is make sure all of Dawn's swastika thongs are folded neatly. Daryl even fixes the brakes on the police cars so they aren't always running into people. Meanwhile, Carl will be older than Rick by the time they come back from season break, so it won't even be creepy when he hooks up with Michonne.

Wait... the doctor has testicles? When did that happen?

Is it wrong that I ship Andrea's Thong with Governor's Eyepatch?

You know what I'm suddenly wondering? Was the strawberry bribe a shoutout to "Firefly?" Now I'm wishing they'd gone in disguised as paramedics, with Daryl rehearsing his one line of dialogue over and over...

In my opinion, this has a lot to do with how slowly things are progressing between him and Michonne. Most of the group tend to look like they at least were clean, within the last few days, but then got dirty again. Daryl probably scrubs down reasonably often, but he lives such as active lifestyle that by the end of the day he's scuzzy again. Rick and Daryl are both top-tier warriors, but the group is not always at war. So when Rick was resting at the church, Daryl was out working on the car. When Rick was at the prison waiting for his peas to grow, Daryl was out hunting and foraging and carrying a deer back all by himself. That's why Daryl always looks dirty, but still looks like he's been groomed at some point in recognizably recent history. Rick, on the other hand, looks like a homeless man who eats people while screaming about how the CIA is putting mind-control nanobots in our underwear. I think that when the writers are ready to commit Richonne to the next level, they will telegraph it by showing Rick take some interest in his own attractiveness.

I think I'm going to start using "Roadrunner" instead of "Bad Bob." Wouldn't it be fun if he never makes it back to the hospital? Every week, we keep seeing like a one or two minute scene of him running around, getting chased by zombies, opening cans of sardines with his teeth, dragging his butt around on the ground like a dog (or maybe against a modern art painting,) trying to get his pants down so he can poop... I'll take the Zombie Apocalypse Adventures of Roadrunner over the FPP Crybaby Hour any day of the week.

Those are not the nipples I would have chosen to see.

He only sunburns on top. Plus, he can heal next week. All the clarity of this week's episode makes me fear that the cliffhanger is going to consist of nothing but impossible-to-see night scenes.

FPP can die immediately. if we never see him again and just assume he got himself eaten, that'll be fine. But of course, if he gets eaten, they'll have to stretch it out into a big stupid holy communion metaphor, because the show seems to be written by some kind of weird space aliens who have never actually seen a real religious person. I've been an atheist for over thirty years, but I still live on the same planet as everybody else. And I know bad writing when I see it. MIchonne continues to get screwed out of screentime. Everybody else got to do something. Couldn't we have maybe seen her and Carl performing a sock puppet show for Judith? And maybe the puppets would be a little too scary for FPP, so that could be why he ran away? Carl as a man of few words actually gives off a quiet dignity and sense of competence that I would never have expected. I may someday forgive him for the hat. The only reason I can think of to bring Tyreese is that he's good for heavy lifting. If Beth or Carol have to be carried, Tyreese can move them faster than Michonne. One thing I'll say for Rick: right or wrong, smart or stupid, sane or crazy.... the man looks absolutely terrifying these days. Believe me, I'm not on the side of the lollicops, but when they were surrounded and outgunned by a group of people led by somebody who looked like Rick, I felt for them. I'd surrender pretty quick, too. Rick Grimes is one scary-looking motherfucker. Daryl was lucky to be able to grab onto the one skull in ten thousand that hasn't turned into quiche. Although even if it had, I think exploding a rotting corpse head all over your attacker's face would still be a pretty good distraction. With all that very specific talk recently about Samson killing Phillistines with the jawbone of an ass, I wonder if the zombie head was meant to be a parallel. Daryl's strength isn't his hair, though. It's his lack of squeamishness.

Well, Merle chose Motorhead as his final tape. Not what I would have expected him to choose, but it did help me start to like him.

I miss them a lot. Because their story is not played out. But we haven't seen Glenn and Maggie as characters together, really, for any amount of time, since Season 3. They haven't organically become boring through, say, plot development. They've simply been sidelined, for the same reason that Sasha gets like two words of dialogue a week. Rick is the Leader, Abraham is/was the Other Leader. Carol is the Sneak Vigilante. Daryl might be awesome if Rick dies, but that's not gonna happen, so Daryl is sentenced to an eternity as Insecure But Otherwise Competent Henchman. Glenn and Maggie, though, are smart, tough, pragmatic, empathic, versatile, sane (aka not really worried about where Beth went...) ultimately, they're just too balanced overall to plausibly give them a lot of screentime as Rick's dumb sidekicks, but they're too popular to kill off, so their story just keeps getting shoved back out of the way of "important" story info, like "Rick likes to make speeches," or "Eugene is full of shit," or "Michonne still has a katana. To use against zombies whose skulls you can shatter by throwing a TicTac at them." .

This. Was. Boring. I got home late, so I could only watch it one time. Usually I give it another chance or five, but I just can't get motivated to sit through it again. Carol single-handedly carried the premier episode, but that's because things actually happened in it. What did we learn this week? Carol has feelings? Daryl was abused? Noah meets up with someone from the main cast? Main characters can always get out of smashed cars and walk away? Shelves become dangerous when there are newly-introduced black guys in the room? Daryl is a tough guy with a crossbow who still has the exact same undamaged arrows after using each one of them 10,000 times? Zombies are a weak, ineffectual nuisance except when the plot demands them to be scary? Carol ends up in the hospital? The lollicops are really, really stupid? Some scenes were done well enough for what they were, and others were just silly. But there was nothing important in it. You could easily skip this entire hour and rejoin whatever passes for a story next week without missing a beat. This season sucks, and my hopes of it getting better are rapidly plummeting. Count me among those who think they're going to kill Carol off soon. If that happens, I think I'm done with the show. Glenn and Maggie never do anything. Tyreese has been flanderized into a useless wuss, and is now being sidelined in favor of an even more uselelss wuss in the form of Father Pee Pants. Sasha and Michonne are invisible. Rick is an idiot. Carl's character doesn't bug me as much as it used to, but his growth rate confuses the shit out of their timeline, and I will never like that stupid hat. Beth is going to start singing as soon as she escapes, and then she'll get drunk and burn down whatever shelter they're staying in. And then Maggie will give a huge crying speech about how much she's missed her the entire time! And I never gave a fuck about the Washington Redscalp team. Carol and maybe Tara are like the only things about this show that haven't gotten steadily worse over time. I'm starting to wish the Governor had moved in with them. At least then we'd get some zany Odd Couple hijinks.

Abraham is younger than Michael Cudlitz, though. You can tell, 'cause of how bright red his hair is.

Can of Beans feels terrible about what happened that day. Oh, not about killing rapists! it's actually quite proud of that. But perhaps if it hadn't given up its contents so readily afterwards, that poor family wouldn't have died running from Sideboob Man's flatulence.