queenjen

Actually Addie, I'm watching a really old season of Atlanta. Where Kim Zolciak has just met Kroy and married. I think it's 2011, so 5 years ago. 2 things relevant to NJ: Nene's son Bryson fathers a child in the next season, Nene makes a big deal of being a 'Glamma' as opposed to the usual. Jac makes this sound like something she devised. And allso in this season, Cynthia is wearing a tshirt with "I act like a lady but I think like a boss'. Sound familiar, Melissa? It's also the season where Greg and Nene have separated and Nene is the object of obsession of a New York Italian guy who she met through Celebrity Apprentice. This guy keeps mimicking Nene's 'catchphrases' (or what he perceives as Nene's), it's embarrassing to the point of being offensive. I see a lot of that from the NJ wives. Not an original thought or style idea between them and so much borrowed blatantly from African American urban culture and copied really badly. I've already commented on this episode on Jac's appalling 'advice' to her pregnant daughter re natural birth. I had 2 home births and 2 other natural in hospital. My home birth midwife gave me some really good advice. She said 'when you're pregnant, EVERYONE is going to give you their opinion as if it is fact. You have to choose 1 or 2 people to listen to and just nod and smile at the rest'. This worked for me. Especially when my first child's grandmother told me that i needed to wash under my infant son's foreskin, because it 'gets dirty under there'. Luckily I asked my midwife and learned that the foreskin is ATTACHED to the penis for around 2 years! Can you imagine? What would that obnoxious botoxed blob know about anything 'natural' unless it's branded as such and she's paying a premium for it in some 'go to be seen' health food emporium? I'm not a fan of Ashlee and I'm not a fan of Jac's or any of the hos on this show anymore. I had hope for the Sigmunster, but she's becoming more shrill and irritating with every episode.

Preach, Petunia. I'm lucky to be alive also. Going through DV does something to women. It affects your confidence, your sense of self...it destroys you. I feel like I died, even though I survived. The isolation puts you in a place you never knew existed and it is really hard to come back, even after leaving the relationship. And i have 2 university degrees and to the outside world I was living a luxurious life. So. David and Shannon's case: they're still together. I don't want to write 'it can't have been that bad', because too much of that happens. To me though, living in a DV situation is long term impossible and someone will end up dead. Learning all this about the Beadors makes me look at Shannon differently, definitely. As written above, maybe David did lock her out or throw something at a wall and did not actually touch her, maybe it happened in front of one of the children. Maybe he pulled up and just happened to have been pushed beyond his limits that day. I could see how that could happen. If alcohol was involved, that would make sense. David completing that course and also committing with Shannon to repairing a marriage devastated by his affair, that really shows some long term commitment to their relationship. Maybe it's because of the 3 girls. Just writing about this is difficult because of the trauma. It's hard to apply logic to it and to turn their relationship this way and that, and examine the angles, like I find myself doing when considering different behaviors I see on this show. If this is the source of some of what we are hearing is to come, I'm not surprised. Also, I found Shannon's flying at Meghan in the first couple of episodes of last season a little wack. It might explain some of Shannon's neurotic behavior around health, too. I really want Kelly gone. Her constant digs at her husband, both on the show and on some of the social media that has been posted here combined with her whining at him about a vow renewal before Glamis? What is it, Kelly? Do you want to be married to this guy or not? Kelly just seems to think that she can be a (that word she through at the Sushi party) and remain entitled to a loving spouse and adoring friends. She's lucky Glamis happened because it interrupted the downward curve of her relationship with the other hos momentarily. For a couple of episodes. Kelly craves acceptance most from Heather and Shannon. I can't figure out why. She apologised to Heather before and during Glamis and the only reason things plateaued was because Heather was in shock and Meghan and Shannon briefly got put on the outs. For a minute, Kelly was in the cool group due solely to her geographical location at the time of the accident. This reunion has definitely got the potential to be explosive. I would ADORE to see Kelly sacked by Andy during the reunion. We've seen Porsha kicked off and prevented from participating. And if Kenya hadn't fully incited that (she was equally culpable IMO) I believe Porsha would have been sacked. Maybe the social media silence does mean something big went down. Or maybe it's all a strategy to build the suspense. Whatever. It's working.

i still got the definite impression from Meghan that there was something going on that she was refusing to participate in. It could have been that she's done with the show and focused on her pregnancy. Or, she was in some way brought into the 'plan', whatever that was, to bring Kelly down. it was her affect in the first Ireland episode when Kelly came crying to her about how Heather had accused her of 'looking into her' (which was some typical blameshifting Kelly Mega Dudd revisionism right there) and that the 'mean girls' all ganged up on her. Meghan's affect there was distance and almost boredom. If she'd picked up a nail file whilst she was lounging on her bed, it wouldn't have surprised me. Good on her. When Kelly realised that Meghan wasn't jumping out of her suite to lead a crucifixion party on Kelly's behalf, the heifer clomped off in her daggy white skirt snivelling about not coming to dinner. This episode, it was Meghan's affect with Tamra. Tamra, veteran of bringing the drama on this show, knows she has to make some comment that can be edited in later regarding the shitstorm she's about to instigate, says to Meghan that she wants to kill Kelly, can't be near Kelly, doesn't know how she's going to cope with Kelly at the upcoming dinner. Meghan, again, just deadpans 'I'm sure you'll handle it'. So, it's seems to me it's either Meghan is done with it and not returning because she's out. OR, and this would be in character for Meghan, she cannot countenance what she knows or suspects is about to happen vis a vis the other hos and Kelly. It was as though Meghan did a stocktake of her 'friends' on this show, looked at Kelly Mega Dudd and went 'nup' and then looked at the other group and was equally disgusted. I'm not a Meghan fan, but last season, she stood up to the 'OG of the OC' and WOULD NOT back down over the Brooks cancer scam. She took a TON of hysterical crap from an unhinged Shannon also within her stride. And she persisted and persisted with her sleuthing into Brooks' records. Along with major cojones, Meghan has always been upfront about fighting for what she believes is right. She's not coming back to the show, everyone seems to know this, so she doesn't need to get involved in Naked Wasted 2.0 or whatever this was meant to be. Or she just didn't want to. I'm glad she's going, I'm not interested in her candle business or her new parenthood, but she is persistent and does great reunion. Also, i think ALL the househos husbands have a major bromance situation going on with Jim. As does Andy apparently. I think Meghan can probably right her own ticket to some extent. Kelly Mega Dudd is either wetbrained or border line retarded. She's an easy target. She shouldn't be on this show. I'll say that again and again. Even when she was with Meghan on that dull as dishwater outing where Meghan LITERALLY interpreted the tourist board's genealogist's comment to 'tap someone on the shoulder'' to find a relative, Kelly's clumsy attempt to get involved was so typical of all Kelly's interactions with other members of the human race. She pointed at a stranger in the street going on with their daily business and yelled 'where are YOU from' or something similar. Zero social skills. Immediately puts other people off. Again, these trips are said to be intense and the producers love them for this. I think all the other hos just had a gutful of Kelly after her juvenile nose flicking and her insistence that she is hilarious and they just don't get her sense of humour and that's their problem because Kelly is hilarious and she IS the party. From that day forward I think they all decided they were done with Kelly and would proceed as if she wasn't there. One thing I WILL say about Kelly and Shannon's interaction on the bus, where Kelly was saying that Shannon was a drunk...remember when one of Shannon's daughters accused her of drinking too much? I think it was after the toilet papering incident that happened when they were on the last vacation. After they returned, Shannon and David sat the twins down to 'discipline' them and one of the girls threw that back at Shannon. That she drank and partied, and it sounded like this was not the first time this had come up the way Shannon shut it down and the look on her face. I think I remember a comment also about Shannon drinking during the day, being 'good' at that or something, again from one of her daughters. Maybe Shannon does drink too much. I've also come around to accept that Heather carrying around a liquor that she doesn't drink may not have been part of a conspiracy to get Kelly to flip, but just an opportunity for Heather to show off her latest megabucks Chanel accessory. However, the way that picnic was edited, Heather definitely came across as trying to push booze on Kelly with the Fireball shot that Heather herself didn't drink, and then the champagne. Heather definitely looked creepy watching Kelly make more an oaf of herself than usual squatting over a croquet mallet in her milkmaid top with her boobs falling out. This just looked sad to me. Heather dressed to the nines in black like something from a Hitchcock film and poor Kelly Mega Dudd: all the Chanel pants in the world just won't change the fact that Kelly can't pull it off. And that HAIR. Limp, badly dyed, flat and boring. All the other hos put effort into their appearance, while Kelly missed that memo. She looks like she'd smell bad in person too. Kelly is just someone that always was and always will be an outsider and will never understand why. She's too easy a target and she needs to be taken off the show. It's not entertaining.

Have we ever seen Kelly in a TH or elsewhere say 'that was wrong, I shouldn't have said that'? Heather at least admitted she shouldn't have gone there re Kelly's kid. She's a lesser version of Vicki in the 'no accountability' stakes. Vicki at least can be amusing and is an ageing good time girl. There isn't an ounce of fun in Kelly Mega Dudd.

Kelly also had so many opportunities provided to her to step down and deescalate her moronic behavior. In the pub with the nose flicking, she was told clearly that it was just childish and annoying. She could have backed off and agreed and apologised and come back with 'let's move on'. But no, she makes a tasteless racially stereotypical comment and then continues to justify it. Which puts her in the position of being the last heifer out of the pub, following a bunch of hos pissed off with her. Again, instead of reflecting and calming down, she escalates, clomping along in her munster shoes and her bow legs and ugly skirt. FF to this episode and I think no one was having her sulky puss. Shannon and Heather and the alcohol were nasty. At dinner, Kelly had that passive aggressive sulk vibe that is unwarranted and uber irritating to anyone without the thickest of skins. So Shannon starts with the whispered double shot tequila orders. These trips are pretty intense. The women usually manage to have a lot of fun, so I can only imagine the fury Heather and Shannon had pent up having to cart classless, vulgar, drunk Kelly or sober surly sulking Kelly around for the day. She was like a wart on a leash dragged behind the rest of the cast. I was fed up with her (again), I can only imagine what it felt like to live it. Reality tv hit paydirt here.

Next week: Kelly Kellysplaining what happened to her 'drunk' husband: 'HEATHER is the puppet and everyone else is the PUPPETMASTER!!!!! and HEATHER is pulling all the strings' and last episode it was 'Heather came at me saying 'YOUUUUU were looking into me!!!!' in the hotel room with Meghan. Unless this was off camera, Heather had nothing to say about Kelly and Tamra and Heather's loan on the lot. I'm glad we don't have spit cam, because I'm sure the saliva was flying while Kelly related the trip to her husband. I haven't seen all of this episode, but it's got to go down as an alltime low with Naked Wasted. No one comes out looking good, except maybe Megan. This feels like a set up that Meghan didn't want to participate in. And if so, some true colours really shone through. I can't stand Kelly from the vat of krazy Kellys that Bravo has out the back of their lot (as I mentioned a few episodes back), and all I can think is that the cast is so completely over this classless tacky mean drunk, that they colluded to push her to a point of no return, where they can be justified in never filming with her again. And again, University educated multimillionaire for years Kelly maybe Freudian slipped in the hotel hallway 'both myselves have been nice to you!!' or similar. She definitely said 'both my selves'. There's certainly drunk Kelly and sober Kelly, but the level of mean just increases depending on the alcohol. Whichever way, I don't want to see Kelly and her horrible fashion and limp hair again. She and Kenya can twirl right off my screen. They both have a way of screeching 'meeeee' because 'me' is the centre of their and everyone elses universe in their minds. I really DO NOT understand how Kelly made the cut for this show. Kelly Mega Dudd.

Again with the uber irritating brattiness of the Gorga spawn. This time Antonia leaning on the horn while her parents approached the car. Not cute, not interesting and deeply unimpressive

Further, Siggy is getting more and more irritating. If she's SOOO focused on family, why can't she STFU and let her poor father continue what he was saying about getting eye surgery? No, she jumps in screaming and shouting about her own plastic surgery. I really liked Siggy, or maybe I like the idea of Siggy, in the first episode. But it's obvious that everything has to be about her. Good luck with that, Sigmunster, because you are rolling with some world class narcissists in this crew. She's decided that her SL is going to be the trials and tribulations of the old school Jewish overbearing mother. It's weak and it's fake. I welcome her reconnecting with her traditions and history, anything that gives the audience a break from the minutiae of these womens' self obsessions. But hammering the 'you'll always be my baaaaabies' theme...just don't do it. We're over it already. Find something else please Siggy.

Richie Wakile Makes everything skeevy (my thoughts so far.)

noticed the models were of different looks shapes and sizes, definitely. It didn't help the shitshow ambience though. I don't know what Kim D was trying to achieve. It looked unpolished and thrown together. I don't understand either why she doesn't emcee herself, or is that not done? My assumption was that emceeing would detract from thirsty Kim D's opportunities to insert herself into a scene with the hos she's managed to net this year. In fact, I think the only reason there IS a 'Posche Fashion Show' at all is for Kim D to remind Bravo she's still here, thawed out from the 364 other days of the year she spends hanging upside down in a cryo tank in her walk in robe and ever ready to step in as a fulltime NJ ho. Kim's dress was leagues more desirable than anything she had chucked on her models.

Angela: "the dance is a symbolisation of freedom and expression and ... who you want to be!!' The first of her neologisms at the most depressing and tawdry book launch I've ever seen. That dancer, grinning like she'd dropped a dance party drug half an hour before, flicking her skirt up and exposing her underwear, what WAS that?!! She was dressed in a ballet style white dress with some ballet style moves but the grinning was just weird and offputting. Like Angela, who clutched her to her bosom once she finally gave it up and came to rest at the hostess' side. Meanwhile, the unfortunate Auckland teens that maybe Angela's assistant found at a school bus stop, are standing there freezing with their shirts off. Very tacky, very disjointed. The room, for all Angela's 'hard work' was just a boring wood detailed room, that she decides to have a White Party in? (no need to feel threatened, Kyle Richards!) I don't blame Anne for dropping the fact, not once, not twice, but three times that she had spent 2k on a dress for the evening. And the 15 or so other guests (WHAT a turnout, keep it real, Angela!) were also dressed to the nines. I really felt for them, they were corralled into this boring wooden chamber with nary a book or Angela in sight for ages, without a bar or food. I would have left and not felt even slightly guilty. Then Angela drops another neologism when she is speaking to Anne, Louise and Racist Julia. She describes the book's conspicuous absence 'as like a little baby I've been waiting to born, really'. Everyone is pissed off, by now. There is a brief reprieve when Angela reveals that they are now going to process to ANOTHER room for the book launch. The 2 half naked teenage boys open a door to reveal...another room exactly the same as the first room, except with copies of 'Being Real' in it. And Louise sums it up " that's when I knew definitively...that the night was a dud". And on it goes, I started nose snorting when the 'very special MC for the evening' turned out to be.....Angela's healer!!! That would be the fluffy charlatan that hovers over Angela pulling invisible daggers out of her that Gilda wished upon her. Allegedly. Remember that? She then introduces the book incorrectly as 'How to Be Real'. Not only does she get the title wrong, she then goes onto an extended metaphor journey with a lemon and Angela and then ends it with a quote from 'our' Coco Chanel that she ...forgets. Hokey boredom, worse, it was just cheap and this wasn't lost on the 3 cast members that showed up. Goodnight Irene. This episode is proof positive of Angela Stone's utter fakery and total delusion. she was 'really happy with the success of the evening and all her friends were having a GREAT time". What a heifer. Predictably, Gilda's booklaunch IS a success, even with the bar being set so low. And predictably, Angela attempts to literally upstage her at her own event by arriving not only 2 hours late, but emerging from behind the stage curtain (quite a hideous spectacle for the unsuspecting audience) DURING the speeches. Racist Snitch Julia immediately stirs the pot by continuing to snitch out conversations that were had at the height of the WTF, Where is Angela? stage of her launch. Angela is particularly upset about Louise, for some reason, despite both Louise and Anne admitting to being bored at her launch. Angela claims Louise is manipulative and fake and not being real. Projection much, Angela? Luckily, in the next episode, Racist Julia in her role as Angela's minion, crosses the line for the rest of the ladies. Finally. Again, Michelle has always been the rudest and most direct with Angela, right from the get go and the 'were you a plus size model?' comment. For some reason, Angela always goes for someone else's throat. Gilda originally and Louise now. Not for nothing, these are the 2 howives that are actually interesting, with careers and affluent lifestyles. Why why why does this clown, Angela Stone, get so much screen time? Apart from her beyond mediocre event this episode, we also had to sit through Angela and her exploited slave intern in a car practicing reverse parking. In what universe is that good television? Gilda is the most interesting in the whole group and the ho we see the least of. Again, you go, Gilda the Good Witch. VV

Omg, giselle thankyou for going there! I didn't know 'vagface' was a 'thing' but I've been thinking it and reacting viscerally to it for years. And of course it makes perfect psychological sense in the world of these women to subliminally project this way. Kelly is definitely going there. Ha ha ha, her cray face works against her, the massive choppers gnashing at the world reverse the intended message, sending out 'vagina dentata' cues instead. It's horrible. Run for the hills, suitors, this one's a dick chopper! Other RHs that have VF: Dolores and Tre from NJ, LuAnn, Lisa Rinna....There are others. They don't necessarily earn VF just because they've done their lips, either. It's subtle and weird. I will have to study further on it. Not because I want to but because now you've named it I can't forget it! But Kelly's is really offputting. Definitely slap that up with some Prep H. Looks exactly like a displaying baboon, especially when she donned the muted purple for her post mortem attempt to rehab her feral behavior. Erk. Subconscious threat vibes to other women, perhaps?

UUuurgh. I just watched this again. KKKelly the Klown (the best thing to come out of this episode is the snark from posters here, thankyou for gifting us with this). KKKelly's tearful recount back in the Presidential Suite with the heavily 10 weeks pregnant Meghan in her elastic waisted maternity pants is totally fallacious! And fictitious and fanciful and just a craic crock. According to Kkkelly, apropos of nothing, Heather pointed her witchy finger and accused Kkkelly of investigating her. This woman is so low rent, vulgar and declasse. In her wet brain, the only lesson she took away from the Sushi party was that the word 'cunt' should not be applied to another woman. Anything else, Kkkelly has figured out, is socially acceptable. So what's the big deal with scream/slurring 'yaar a farking LIAR, is what you are' up and down the hallowed historical home of James Joyce and George Bernard Shaw and William Butler Yeats? Can you imagine, with a bar in every void space in her house, what the Dodd zoo sounds like every evening? Dressing down in muted matchy purple with a pussy bow for the post mortem THs .... it's not hiding her big ugly mouth. In the early scenes on the pub crawl from hell, you could see Kkkelly mouthbreathing while she morphed into her 'just add alcohol' Incredible Hulk self. Because she wasn't the centre of attention. Flicking adult women in the nose was her desperado attempt to wrest herself some camera time. She's now in damage control. I noticed in the scenes for the next episode that she is indeed still with the trip, though sitting sulkily and tearfully in a corner and trying to shift blame onto Shannon for trying to ply her with tequila (probably because she is again making the rest of the cast uncomfortable and Shannon is over it and trying to change her mood). Again, the manufactured outrage after instigating classless drama is a page right out of Kenya's playbook. And FIX YOUR HAIR!!!! For all their nastiness, an Atlanta Howive would not be caught dead leaving the house with that limp floppy do. She's all gaping maw and gnashers. I bet there was spit and halitosis flying also. Kkkelly is one of those unfortunate people that looks as though they'd smell bad. She really makes my skin crawl and I get a strong vibe this is exactly how Heather Dubrow feels also. I bet there is never a scene shot from this point on with Kkkelly and Heather alone. I never want to hear her shriek 'meeeean' or 'meeeeee' again. Lord, I can't abide the victim show.

So Kelly Dodd is a millionaire who is university educated. And since her entrance this season, she's also been clear that she is basically THE stand up comedian and life of everyone's party. WHO has been telling Kelly that she is beautiful, hilarious, gorgeous and intelligent all her life? That desiccated muppet of a mother? Because Kelly really believes this. She is genuinely outraged both on this episode and in the blog she wrote about this episode, that the other hos don't get her sense of humor. Or WON'T get her sense of humor, as though they are deliberately withholding it from adorbs and talented Kelly because they are all 'meeeeeeeeean girls!!!!' I'm having major Kenya flashbacks watching Kelly, along with Kelly Bensimmon flashbacks and this is deeply disturbing and traumatizing to me. In the first episode, Kelly made what seemed to be maybe an illadvised attempt at humor about Shannon's kids' school. Then she got huffy when Shannon wasn't having it and refused to give her the time of day. Except huffy for Kelly, probably then on the best behavior we'll ever see from her, morphs into flailing abusive rage (Kenya) with a side of insanity (Kelly B). And a couple of episodes later, she's stewed on Shannon's perceived slight and escalated it into 'you're a c***, is what you are! !!' in a restaurant setting, alienating the entire cast. Heather speaks for the entire universe in calling her out and reprimanding her and asking her to leave and becomes known to Kelly as Principal Dubrow. Kelly only got a reprieve because of the Glamis accident and the whole Vicki/hospital/casseroles vs Shannon and Meghan brouhaha. Now that's died down, there's room for Kelly to be herself again. She could so easily have learned from her earlier experiences and altered her interactions. But no. Like Kenya, this one is pathological. I suspect she has wet brain also. Heather's reaction I think didn't just reflect Heather's fury at being included in a group of women whose behavior resulted in their being asked to leave a retail establishment, it also reflected her disgust at Kelly reverting to type. Heather had Kelly pegged after the expletive dinner and it's painful for Heather to share air with this declasse horned toad. I was really hoping she'd huff all the way home to Michael and the rest of the menagerie. Poor Meghan. I cringed for her when Kelly forced her way into the presidential suite within her. And now she's stuck with this ugly, ignorant, insane instigator. She's not in Kenya 's league for being clever with her instigation, but she is definitely in the league for me of hos i don't want to see on my tv again. This includes boring, transparent and vicious Kenya and racists Julia from Auckland and Lidiot from Melbourne. And the Beth monster and Teresa Giudice. Kelly Dodd is not entertaining in the slightest. She's defaulting to a disturbing level of vulgarity and aggression and there's just no story line. Bring on new blood before there's real blood. Oh, and in her blog, college educated Kelly referred to Tamra 'threating her'.

This is the second time that Kelley has had his unfortunate and staggering flatulence 'caught' on air. And I'm with you, HunterHunted, he's got lame game, cliched game. Take off shirt, flex, 'will you apply sunscreen to my rippling bronzed Adonis body?', I'm taking you down the slide!! So I can exploit bodily contact and when then that wasn't enough, he buries his face in her crotch. I think too much lesbian PDA did something to Kelley's pheromones and he reverted to his most primal memory of male female relations: breastfeeding. It was just painfully weird to watch. And Ben! 'Is this really my circus?? Are these really my monkeys? Cosmo!!'. The last segment was surreal. Nico is out of it, firmly in the naughty corner after disgracing himself last week. He had the best chance, too. Good work, Nico. I like him though. He is cheery and took all this on the chin and some of his quips about Snr Dickhand, Trevor, were priceless. No one has mentioned Trevor!! I was amazed Cpt Lee didn't rip into all of them during the tip meeting, what was with that?? Especially Kate, when she didn't answer the radio and he had to physically come down from the wheelhouse in order to 'introduce some levity' after the boating near miss. AND make a jugful of Painkillers himself. Cpt Lee is HOT! He has SKILLS! I'd be really interested to know how he is feeling about Kate IRL about now. I have heard publicly only that he has said he is 'disappointed'. I didn't look up how the court thing went down, that should have been a week ago. Kate is definitely slipping. Physically she is looking harrowed and strung out. Her Chief Stew game is way down. The endless texting...I'm really amazed Ben didn't do more to call her out on that. Maybe he feels that coming from him, it would look too much like jealousy. Her heart and her head are really not in the game this season. Maybe it is her relationship with Ro, but given how THAT ended and the multiple mentions of Ambien this episode and Kate's prior record regarding prescription drugs...attractive party girls like Kate don't take to ageing very well. Especially when their identity and career choices are based on their looks. It's like Kate is having a mid life crisis. I think that what is easy to interpret as jealousy on Ben's part, may also be major side eye about the strange choices he sees Kate making, including the gag inducing amount of PDA and pschotic giggling. Ben DOES know Kate quite well and she is really off. As others observed, she doesn't seem comfortable with Ro's presence at all, or her physicality. Her body language was not reading as receptive. I think the idea of a leap into the lady pond appealed to Kate's idea of herself, but once she was actually confronted with a real human being attached to this, she froze. And then apparently exploded. And Ben's below radar long game campaign for Emily began this episode!! I knew it. She's not interested in Kelley, Nico did his dash, Kyle is a psycho wrangler and not fazed by Sierra, so the field just opened. Like a poster above, I do not see the attraction with Emily either. She's awkward and freaky looking to me. She IS a smart girl, good private school, the right kind of English (unlike Julia!), academically gifted...right up Ben's alley. Ben's a professional. He let the young 'uns strut and burn out, NOW he'll make his play. Lauren I feel sorry for. She's attractive, quick witted and so overlooked. She's possibly a better match for Kelley. OR Kyle. Especially as she's an Aussie and we share a lot of cultural similarities with the Brits. No more Ro on the boat. I wonder how long it will be before Kelley needs to call Amy for advice. He obviously needs it for backchatting Cpt Lee like that. If the man wants clean windows and ironed shorts and a bowl of Cheerios in the wheelhouse before 7am, you haul your crew out of their bunks and get on it. Foolish boy. I miss the shamed and disgraced tugboat Captain! Come back, Bosun Eddie, all is forgiven!

I'm rewatching these seasons again, and as episode follows episode, Kenya becomes more transparent and more grating. She's not a housewife, she's never been one, she's not from Atlanta, why is she back? Is it because all she does, as Kim Fields pointed out, is instigate? Porsha certainly crossed the line but Kenya has been behind every nasty fight of major consequence since she arrived on this show. Her THs are always totally self serving and self aggrandizing. I am well aware that physical violence is a line that can't be crossed. However, in some places there are also laws that address inciting violence. Kenya is an expert at this. And her MO is always to chuck the grenade, then run for cover behind some semantic bs with her finger pointed at whomever she is trying to take down. And then play the victim "I was trying to bring everyone together/help them address their issues!! etc' . I feel sorry for her dreadful history (that i'm also tired of hearing about), but one thing a childhood like that is amazing at producing is narcissists and sociopaths. I think Bravo has signed her up again because Kenya feels that since she has been crowned Miss USA, she genuinely, legitimately feels she is more beautiful, more successful, more entitled, more fabulous, just MOORE everything. I have as much desire to see and listen to Kenya for another season as I have for Teresa Guidice. I REAAALY hope Sheree checks her. The only other ho that Kenya seemed to tread somewhat lightly around, was Nene. Kenya is insanely jealous of the actual housewives (those with husbands) and insanely jealous of friendships (like Nene and Marlo). I think she has permanent acid indigestion while Porsha drives around her African earned Rolls, when Kenya only got a Bentley out of HER African prince. Cos Kenya Moore keeps score. Her voice and false laugh are like nails down a chalkboard, at this point. She is just plain nasty and is going to be a lonely old woman. Her, Teresa and Bethenny should all have a show together and get away from this franchise. How long before it starts? I think it's usually early November?

Well, that's a shame, Tumamita Because Teresa is planning her empire on us ALL buying what she's selling. Nuh uh. Me neither. Also, Teresa never 'talks' about the criminal stuff. Except to giggle girlishly and make silly comments about knowing what you are signing. it's all because of her upbringing, y'all! Old school Italian women left all that to the menfolk! Thing is, most old school Italian women stayed at home, looking after the kids and doing the housework, sometimes working in the businesses. Working hard, I might add. 70% of my classmates were Italians when I was in primary school. One thing they're Mamas DIDN'T do, was shop, conspicuously consume, lounge around all day lunching etc etc. So there is a major disconnect between these women and 'old school' Italian women. If you want to build a walk in robe the size of a small apartment, then fill it, you are responsible for knowing where that money comes from. The Italian mothers I knew were also thrifty. These women are some of the most wasteful and audacious in their consumption that I've ever seen. The Italian mothers I knew were in church at LEAST every Sunday and usually throughout the week and on special feast days also. I think that's what irked me so much with Tre and Dolores filming in the church. I'm surprised they didn't get smote. I wish they had got smote. They want all the respect that comes with the 'old school' lifestyle without putting any of the effort in whilst spending like the Caesars. It's not pretty.

Did anyone else get a Sopranos vibe at the Lauritas with the geese? I thought they were celebrating the arrival of the pair of geese, like Tony Soprano obsessing over his ducks in the first episode. But no, they just wanted wheezy fat Santino to chase the birds off their property. Still. Tony thought he was nuts. Jac is the real deal. And won't be seeking help either.

gaPeach one thing Siggy (and I can't stand her) did say that made sense, and I think she said it twice was that when the past gets brought up, all the good effort falls apart. She'll be saying that a lot more, too, because all this group does is go round in circles with old material.

I just realised that there's a rival Angela (Angie) Stone, from R&B Divas! Sweet, I'm going to watch it and compare. Auckland's Frankenstone is the most delusional of howife monsters. If I was into drinking games, I'd be doing a shot everytime she pulled that ghastly closed mouth smile that gives her a chin rivalling Jay Leno's. I know it's mean to pick at looks, what plucks my last nerve is the permanent attitude of superiority and smugness on her face. And that voice. Does she think it is soothing, mellifluous, feminine? It's just irritating. I want Gilda, she of the supreme subsonic shade, to OWN Ms Stone. You GO there, Gilda. And Gilda's book is far superior. I'll actually look in bookstores to buy it as opposed to libraries to borrow Angela's so I can fall about laughing at the delusion of the beast.

New refrain from NYC reunion's 'Carole, STFU', 'Siggy, STFU'. Everytime she opens her trap it's like she's got her hand waving in the air going 'me! me! ME! I"M the relationship EXPERT!!!'. This show doesn't need a relationship expert. It needs refs and wardens and psych nurses. Due to Teresa's preeminence on this show, the cast live in a state within NJ called Denial where all the waterways run very shallow. Siggy trying to find their depths and their fountains of deep love for one another?? It isn't happening. I thought if anyone would be carted off and locked up for treatment, it'd be Wack Jac first, but I can now see Siggy curled up in the foetal position and babbling. Melissa isn't deeply hurt because of her deep love for Jac. Melissa just wants to get paid and the only way that's going to continue is if she becomes a Teresa robot. Melissa is already gone there. I grew up Catholic, don't film in a church, especially when you've already admitted that you actually haven't been in one since you got back from writing your book at a camp for girls. It's schlocky and hypocritical and really boring. All these women do is endlessly repeat how the kids are growing up! We have them for such a short time! Teresa was misled and it's no one's fault! They're all old school! Even though being old school means your husband can cheat and keep you in the dark and disappear all your assets over night! None of them are deep, none of them are spiritual and none of them are zen. Ashlee's going to have a natural birth? Dream on, princess. And I had an icky shudder go down my spine when images unbidden sprang into my head of Ashlee and Breanna (Vicky's daughter from OC) becoming howives. Once the wedding excitement and the baby excitement is over, I see 'go getter' Ashlee becoming whiny attention seeking miserable Breanna. Cos that's when the real work begins. And then, out of nowhere, the newly independent state of Dolores starts counselling Chris out of the only sane move anyone has made in this episode?? Is he dumb enough to take her advice and not just get on with men's business? He is, isn't he. I'll watch next week just to confirm this, but this franchise is going exactly where I feared it would. The whole cast is completely at the whim of Teresa, who has the emotional iq of a toddler. I see books written in 10 years, when these hos have faded into oblivion, telling the 'real' story, how much Teresa really knew etc. I just have a deep unease with a reality show rehabbing a convicted felon when she's been found guilty and done prison time. And Joe Gorga was so skeevy as a youngster dancing with Teresa, that ill advised wannabe 'stache! And Teresa saying that her and her brother had always been so close...really? I always got the feeling that they were very competitive. OR has Teresa's always ruled the roost and had her delusions catered for? Maybe that's the original family dynamic with the Gorgas and now the show has reformed itself in this image for Teresa's ongoing comfort. Posche fashion show: WHAT is with the dried blood coloured lace obsession? Like the dreadful jumpsuit LuAnne wore from her own collection, it was the first dress out on Kim D's runway. Low rent event, and Kim D careful to wear something not from the collection and come away looking best dressed. And Kathy Wakile in as many background shots as possible....bleh.

Hoo boy. I just caught Kate on WWHL with the Countess. She is looking fried. Deep fried with the crazy eyes. And sooo sadly low rent beside LuAnn. I was flashing back to the first time she sashayed down the dock towards Cpt Lee and then introd herself as being the 'Paris Hilton of my hometown' along with the whole getting into yachting to find a rich husband manifesto. Right now she needs to pitch a business plan to her charter guest soulmate Dean of the rocket shaped towel and hope he considers taking her on for old time's sake. Stat. I also remember Kate saying that there is a use by date for stewing and she may not have too many stew years left. Kate doesn't have 'too many' stew years left. Her yacht has definitely sailed. Maybe Sonja Morgan would take her as an intern. She looked really haggard. She was not put together well, lacking a bra, for example, her boobs seemed to be lopsided and in a strange position under her baggy raspberry dress. She talked a little limited smack on the Ro situation, but the whole court thing was pending then (a couple weeks ago). Much as I love me some chief stew Kate, and she really has been reality tv gold, she is in desperate need of some zen. She looks like one of those people with all consuming inner turmoil that occasionally erupts and which burns them out from the inside. Her face was haggard, her eyes were dull and sunken, her hair was a frizzy non do and she's now way too thin in a no muscle flabby unhealthy way. This is not a well woman. I actually feel concern for Kate. Maybe we could gofund some rehab.

Ben's Dad is author Peter Robinson, author of the Inspector Banks crime novels. He'd be making major bank these days. Wiki says he lives in Canada now. So Ben is in no way minor nobility. This is new money. His hobnobbing with royalty, if it even happened, would have been down to the elite private school he attended. Like the one Emily attended. It's brewing between those 2. Emily is everything Julia wasn't.

It's not Kelley playing the long game with Emily. Step aside, amateurs (blows on knuckles while flipping a crepe)...The real Emily long game is brewing in the galley. Ben. Also, both Nico AND Emily claimed they were freaks when they introd themselves in their Ep 1 THs. I think Ben wet himself a little bit when he saw this. And I'm also pretty certain the drunk pantsless person being led away in the early promo is also Ben. I think this season is going to heat up especially give we know iRL that Kate truly flies off the rails. I actually bust out laughing at Kelley earnestly mansplaining how girls 'catch feelings'. I like this version of Kelley better than whiney pole dancing Kelley. But hell man, what's with not keeping Cpt Lee's windscreen wiped next episode? ! I wonder if that was a delegation to the new guy issue, anyway, we'll find out soon enough. Kyle I am positive was described by Cpt Lee as 'way too green' with a FML shake of his head. Did anyone else catch that? And he surprisingly didn't even start with Kyle arriving late to board. He definitely took Sierra over the hurdles for that. I was vindicated when I guessed Alaskan Face referred to her heritage: the many Scandinavian migrants in the north of America, but she's also dumb with a side of psycho. Thankfully we didn't hear anymore about her passion for juicing, even though she's shown incapable of operating a manual citrus juicer. I felt for Lauren, but am I the only woman watching that thinks apart from off the market Cpt Lee, the pickings are slim? Kelley is still too immature, ditto Nico, Ben I root for but just can't and Kyle is green and kinda weedy. The beard may have worked on a trawler but not on the Valor. And he failed the Kate test when her offer of an apple totally flew over his head. I'm a Housewives freak too. I venture further afield for the Below Deck franchise, Apres Ski, Work Out NY, Million Dollar Listing. Stuff like that. The Hos are still my bread and butter, but I'm enjoying Below Deck and it's improving. Feel free to recommend others, I'm in Australia so we don't get everything. Shahs. Watch them also. Was it Emily or Sierra with the 'i feel so used' line from the promo? Cos if it was Emily, Ben must have been a bad boy!

I agree that factions are forming for screen time and what I hate is that all of this revolves around Teresa. I think despite coming out as Number 1 in a list I saw that rated every howive on every franchise (with the exception of Auckland and maybe also Cheshire and Vancouver), I really feel Teresa is well past her Use By date. I'll take Melissa's fakery over Tre's any day. Teresa gives NOTHING away. And not in a cool way. It's like listening to a politician get interviewed. We're going to hear NOTHING about her time in jail (beyond weirdass stories about a group of girls on a camp getting it on), how she really got there, what Joe did etc. In the special done on OC's infamous Season 8, one of the producers described the initial casting interview for Heather Dubrow. He said they loved her but they didn't think she was ready to let her guard down sufficiently for the audiences of the Howives franchises. In earlier seasons, when Teresa was a totally different and I think better, at least for reality tv, person she was interesting. She is teflon and lead insulated these days as well as dumb as a sack of hair. And this latest episode really highlighted all of this. The rest of the cast also can't function. None of them have even a vaguely interesting story line. Maybe the Gorgas, but I'm just not interested in repeats of Teresa and Melissa ride the Gondola and take selfies. Melissa is also fading if (and she will) she continues as Teresa's loyal sister in law with the zipped lip. Mel is safe atm and this was reflected in the calm with which she dealt with Mad Jac's manic potstirring. Her and Tre were all 'bitch. Don't even. More chicken wings, waiter'. So it's Tre and Melissa and a cast of irrelevants. I really wish that Bravo would replace Manzo'd with Morons' with a Giudice based show and select a whole new cast for New Jersey. You can tell they're desperate when they keep threatening us with such moral luminaries as Kim D? G? and the dreadful Danielle Staub (thanks for that Jacqueline, your friendship with Danielle is permanent proof of your slippery grip on reality and sanity). Delores, Siggy and Jac are dull. Melissa is becoming a Tre robot. Tre already IS a robot. And I CANNOT see how the Giudices can continue to support their lifestyle, I really can't. Maybe production knows more and they see it coming. I hope for their sake that the Gorgas have no business involvement with the Giudices. I have just watched Reza in the new shoe Yours, Mine and Ours which he costars in with Taylor Spellman. WHY do I think 'Siggy' every time I see Taylor? ! Anyone else? I was hoping for so much more from Siggy, but she is smothered by this crew. Recast this franchise. I'm hoping I'm wrong and I'll just stop watching only to have to catch reruns because something spectacular has happened. Like the news that I hope hits soon about Auckland where a white Ho called a black Ho a 'boat n****'. That said, I want the racist Ho sacked because that's a line that cannot be crossed. This would NOT fly in the USA, but 1 of the Melbourne Howives did it and now this. Calling Teresa a criminal is just a matter of record if not particularly friendly.