queenjen

I haven't been here for a while, forgive me if this has been litigated already, but Kevin downsells his food and it irritates me. He insists on coming out and presenting it and micromanaging the presentation, then it's all eyes on Kevin for, 'oh, it's just a slab of meat, and that's just some potatoes. I just thought you'd maybe like it'. No! SELL it to us, Kevin, because it's not all that anyway! He needs to be taken aside and prepped on guest communication. He's done this in front of Cpt Lee at least twice so far. Kevin needs to leave the word 'just' out of all food related guest communications.

Chelsea is giving major 'Princess Anne in the 70s' teas. I want to point out that Shep is heavily invested in being perceived as 'intelligent' and educated. He really needs us to believe that he is operating at an entirely more elevated level intellectually than his cast mates. I'm here to point out that he really does NOT come off as anything other than average. Despite for example, the many books on the Vietnam War he has casually scattered around his living quarters and likes to refer to, they are as much a prop as Craig's pillows. Shep has nothing better to do with his time. Anyone that gets mailbox money and doesn't NEED to work can pick up a hobby and pursue it with more vengeance than us regular folk who have the moral fortitude to not only figure out how to earn enough to live and have hobbies but ALSO have the necessary selflessness to do this whilst ALSO sacrificing selflessly for out relationships and family. I've lived around academics and high achievers all my life. Shep is nothing special. He's not particularly fluent. For someone who seems to cherish being 'unbeatable in a debate, he's not particularly quick on his mental feet and his rejoinders and arguments are never elevated. On top of that, he's started to age physically as fast as TRape did. And his reunion look is just sloppy. Not laid back, not ironic, not preppy, just sloppy. Kathryn looks less like a saloon girl than she has at previous reunions. It's obvious when she's using a stylist. Tonight is one of those nights. Hopefully she'll retire the pleather pants next season. Way WAY too much Cameran. She's not a big enough player on this show to be featured so heavily in this reunion. No Whitney. No surprise. The whole manufactured 'Kathryn and Whitney hooked up ' SL just wouldn't stand up to scrutiny. Whit is hopeless at playing along. I don't get why he can't come out. I don't hold that against him. I DO get irritated having the 'Whitney is hetero' SL being foisted upon us. Especially when Whitney himself cannot play along on camera. This season was hobbled from the git because 1 particular producer could NOT let go of Ashley. According to Tamara Tattles, for example, the cast were forced to film with her if as punishment (Naomi had to do her scene because she flaked out of the cast trip ). There is nothing organic about Ashley's appearances. Hopefully, that producer has worked out that the Ashley /TRape angle is played out and next season we'll see the cast in their more natural environment again. And can we PLEASE stick Austen in his briefs gaslighting Madison into the vault? Every single episode this season, sometimes more than once. I think we've seen enough.

I watch these shows with closed caption and someone is having a lot of fun with writing them. Not just Potomac, all the Bravo shows. During the segue between Monique's boring cpr session and Candiace at the restaurant, the background music was described as 'bombastic' with 'operatic vocalising'. The latter could have been a description of the weird waily sounds Candiace makes randomly though , I'm not sure. I recommend switching on the subtitles, it's quite amusing and occasionally surprising what they actually catch when these shrews are all yammering at once. So far, this episode has been a lot of filler. I don't need to see Monique's CPR lesson with her irritating rugrats sending my blood pressure up. Karen doesn't deserve a sister like Bridget who took care of the Huger parents so Karen could 'spread her wings '. Which, by the way, seems to contradict what Karen said about her folks : I tthought she said she had to move so they could live with her at one stage? Regardless, the woman is an insatiable attention seeker. During the car ride, Karen made sure everything was about her, or reflected on her. She looks a fool in that car with that wig. And Rayven's vocals were unpleasant. What TF was that stupid truck scene supposed to be? Robyn doesn't have 100+k to spend on a truck, I'd be willing to bet. It reminded me of the Gorgas and a similar scene with their 'garbage business '. Too many Sheilas for me to follow. I still get creeped out by Ashley's mother. I really don't want to see more confirmation of Sheila's horrible taste in men. I feel for Ashley but don't need to see any more of her grifter family on screen.

Catch Hannah's low key 'you'll always be a 3rd stew to me ' shade with Anastasia: 'killing animals is something you need to be able to do AS A CHEF'. Hannah is superficially supportive of Anastasia, but in reality, she's slavering in anticipation that Ana fails. That said, watching Anastasia mug and simper and baby talk about having to 'murder ' lobsters? Take a row. She gave Joao his 2nd chance this episode, no, 3rd to show what a manly Zimbabwean he truly is as he butchered the crustaceans for her. Prior to that, he removed the drunken sailor and saved the anchor. Where was Travis when lobsters needed butchering? Also, while I fully believe last season Joao is still present, Travis' reaction to Joao speaking to him where Travis walked of muttering expletives, calling Joao a fking dckhd? Nothing Joao did during that interaction seemed to warrant that response from Travis. But. I'm wondering if Joao's 'redemption' arc is all we're seeing. That, or Travis is really unhinged. I'm wondering if Travis will be the 1 to be fired too. I found his sudden 'appreciation of Anastasia' speech rather weird. The fact that he's also spending time with her in the Galley could give Hannah reason to go at Anastasia, given Hannah probably regards Travis as her territory, even though she turned down his date. The only thing that makes sense to me with respect to June is if she's Conrad's current GF (1 of the rumours) and just not cut out for the kind of intrigue that production are seeking. June throwing up in response to Hannah's 2nd raptor like question about whether she has a boyfriend makes sense if she's really uncomfortable with the idea of Hannah finding out. June constantly whines about how mean Hannah is to her (when she's really not. June is behaving with great incompetence ) possibly because she'll feel better about being outed as Conrad's GF if Hannah is truly a monster in June's eyes. I hope Anders the obgyn comes home to find he's got no patients. He is crass and tacky. The guests of the primary seem to be vying with 1 another (and led in this by the primary's classless wife ) to impress the great Johnny Damon with constant references to his virility. Really not a classy standard of guests, this lot. It's sad how frequently we see this dynamic on these charters. Jackie, the Queen of Versailles, seemed to be barely tolerated by her guests also.

The guests are Bravo whores. They were last seen on Shahs of Sunset when Reza 'cut a lot of cheque' - I think it was 500k - without Adam's knowledge or consent. The Funsches were the people who manufactured Reza's Diamond Champagne Alkaline Silver Seaweed Hair line that is going to fund his and Adam's retirement. Remember them anyone? I remember thinking at the time what a freakin weirdo Mr Funsch is and there was a lot of talk about deserving the lifestyle and a big echoey tacky AF mansion that looked Sheree Whitfield furnished. We all knew that Reza wasn't going to see his 500k back as soon as we met the Funsches. We didn't get to meet tonedeaf daughter Funsch and the doctor son was probably chained up in the basement where he needs to be. For Hannah to run from a single doctor on a Super Yacht, he has to be emitting some weapon grade serial perv vibes. Beyond obsessing over the phenomenon that is The Funsches at their leisure and especially poor Mrs Funsch and the lack of attention she receives, I think Anastasia did beautifully. As a cook, i felt for her and i think I'd have behaved like she did : the nerves, the unfortunate cockiness. Anastasia's response was normal. Mila was unnatural. The woman wasn't just 'not a chef' she is also not even a cook. 'What for to do with this calcium clad oval object i see sitting with 11 identical others, i wonder? '. Sandy remains unimpressive. Mila needed to be told what a time wasting tip jeopardising asshat she truly is.

Jack irritates me. That scene where he does that male thing where they pretend dishes stacked according to size is some absurd unrecognizable system in order to prevent being asked to perform the chore again. ..Jack's whole raison d'etre is work avoidance. I'm sure it'll become an issue once Mila is shitcanned. I've read that she's a plant. I don't know about that, but it's blatantly obvious she's not a chef. She's not menu planning or capable of juggling timings for the buffets she's been skating by on let alone cooking and plating sensational food. Anastasia isn't up to yacht charter standard either otherwise they could demote Mila to 3rd Stew and all would be in balance. I've heard we get Ben back. I'm not averse as long as I don't have to look at his rabbity girlfriend. We saw Hannah's true colors. She had the opportunity to tell Mila just how bad she is with no downside. She could have been bitchier about it and it needed to be said, particularly as the tip relies on the food above all else. Her comment that Mila's attitude either means she's patient or is used to it happening (getting demoted in her own galley ) was very perceptive. Looks like Collie is on another homesick arc. Round 2 and he's still not getting any action. I live for hearing his Mom call him 'Collie'..(this has also been noted in the Watch What Crappens podcast universe!). Hate CPT Sandy's mixed message management style. I also LOATHE that we are getting Joao's sadsack sensitive guy side only of the 'Brooke cheated on me ' break up.

Tinsley did NOT tie up emergency services trying to revive her dead dog. I did NOT just hear that? !! And Ramona's Surprise party for Sonja and Dorinda? I just thought 'why do they need a surprise? '. Then I realised that the cast have mutined against LuAnn who no doubt thought that her Kristmas Kabaret with the Kountess was an obvious dead lock for the finale cast event for the season. So LuAnn has just discovered that she won't be again receiving a big Bravo promotion for her Cabaret because the group nixed it. I BET she promised all her sound people and recording studio and song writers (!) that there'd be huge media via the show. She can't break the 4th Wall and the rest of the 'group text ' conspirators sent Ramona because she's the most oblivious messenger, but Lu was PISSED. Good on them though. It's a power move. If Lu is truly 'receiving ' their messages about her self absorption, she should 'get' that this is what not always being first in line for massages and hair actually feels like. And poor lonely Barbara is the only sap that turns up and she's sat somewhere in the back of the venue. This is how Lu rewards her loyalty? Babs attendance is probably the ONLY reason ANY of Lu's show got any airtime. Lu is not learning a thing. Her narcissism and tone deafness is terminal at this stage. Bethenny. ...your chest in the aerobics gear. .what IS going on with her implants?

@sunshine23 I'd recommend watching this episode because of some of the down low power shifts going on with LVP out of the picture and Camille The Nominated Target absent at the last minute. Notice what a toxic buzzkill Erika is and how Kyle seems to be pushing SLs for the future, like 'Erika isn't fun ' whilst the 3 Amigos (Kyle, Teddi, Dorit ) and Rinna keep oddly chanting what a FUN GROUP we are! Look at us having FUN! While Erika spits out 'I'm good ' between clenched teeth.

@LibertarianSlut i love your work and bow down to the cross franchise and seasonal referencing! Absolutely agree with you concerning Erika's 'migraine' . It's always something with Erika and these group trips. The period at Teddi's beach house last season. She's a foul tempered woman. I think she had a bad hangover from breakfast the day before. The whole group held its collective breath as she sat down to breakfast, waiting to see if Erika was going to be insufferable and aggressive as usual. Production certainly documented their reactions, which later included an eye roll from Kyle when she overtalked Erika at dinner. On the car ride home, Kyle is nudging along the 'Erika doesn't like us' SL as well, with Dorit and Teddi. I really hated the TH where Erika lets us know that woman haven't done shit for her throughout her life. That she's always felt competitive. And therein lies the issue. Erika should be asking herself why she elicits this pattern of reactions from other women and change that shit up. Miss 'it's expensive to be me-hee!'. She contradicts her EJ persona with this lame anti feminist crap and it really burns my bacon. And Rinna electing herself Greek Chorus, telling us when Kyle and Teddi are having a beautiful 'moment ' and giving us repeatedly in her THs the Erika Party Line 'why are we still talking about this? !' when Rinna is the one perpetuating it? Rinna has no natural SL here. Because she hasn't got a personality of her own. She glommed on to Erika 3 seasons ago. It tickles me to keep track of Rinna elbowing everyone aside to sit with the Cool Girl who couldn't give a crap whether Rinna drew air that morning or not. Rinna was the 1 at breakfast to break the stalemate of Erika's c***y mood, and suggest everyone get moving. Leaving Erika to her phone and the breakfast table. And it was all Erika desperately asking for Deep Conversation at dinner imo. Rinna just jumps onto anything Erika wants and promotes it. I really wonder if at some stage off camera Erika has ever snapped on Rinna for bring such a smothering sycophant. The tension on their van ride home when Erika objected to what she perceived was Rinna asking permission to lie down in the back had Rinna look momentarily terrified. I agree that this trip feels darker too. And I see Kyle driving SLs, like the 'Erika doesn't like us ' of the van to the nonsense she insisted over Erika's objection that there WAS a problem between them about Rinna's ass licking EJ performance. Oh, also getting lost in this episode for those of us finding we are warming to Dorit. .Dorit was almost 'Camille! You're a C**t!' level rude to Teddi when they left the table at dinner for the bathroom. Forgetting Teddi's name with arrogance, making certain Teddi remembers where she is on the totem pole. My hatred was instantly restored. Rewatch if you need same, because Dorit is a classless grifter. She hated Kyle's impersonation too and didn't know how to respond. Telling Kyle it was no surprise she hadn't had an 'acting job since you were 7' was pretty heavy. I sincerely hope Dorit was doing coke in the Château bathroom and had Teddi participate! Miss Accountability wouldn't know how to forgive herself the next morning! And because it just can't be said enough : Kyle! STAHP with the smug faced splits routine. That and 'is that a BEEEE??!!' ceased to be of interest in Season 1. Personally, I'd not miss Erika because she's not authentic. We're getting the 'approved message '. And the rest of the cast are too weakwilled to challenge her. Like what's REALLY going on with her and Tom?

Oh hell! What has The Morally Corrupt Faye Renick done to her face! !! WAS that Faye who Kyle was talking about Camille with in the previews? Faye had a very particular look. She had panther eyes (Dinner Party From Hell) now her eyes look like 2 pissholes in the snow. Whatever she's done, she looks smoother but aged.

A poster above mentioned that Erika is learning what it's like to be the target of a Kyle Richards (Kyle 'Bitchards' was a nickname I bet she earned ) mean girl attack. Kyle drunk and doing her 1 trick pony 'signature ' splits? Retire the act, Kyle. At one stage, she had her mike pack doing a Sonja Morgan Snatch Guard circa seasons ago in Atlantic City. But mostly, when Kyle gets shitfaced like this, the big hair 80s inner mean girl is so much more visible. Teddi and Kyle were still wasted from lunch at dinner. Kyle drunkenly speaking over Erika and babbling rubbish (as rubbishy as Teddi's 'i just want things to be greeeat. Wawawa' later) had us on the verge of an EJ meltdown. Also, I thought it was very telling that Erika even let Kyle in to talk the same crap to her AND when Kyle contradicted Erika by insisting that they DID have a problem? To me that sounded like Kyle making a top dog move with LVP out of the way. Kind of 'no, Erika. If I say it's a SL? It's a SL'. If it had been anyone other than Kyle that overtalked EJ, there'd have been an EJ meltdown. I hope to all that's holy that one day EJ pulls that stunt with someone who isn't having it and who snaps back harder and tells her to take a row of seats. What's EJ going to do then? Hit her with her handbag? And Rinna. Everytime she asked 'WHY are we still talking about this? !' in her THs, it was because Rinna herself had brought up or extended the duration of the topic. As someone else said, Rinna wants to be EJ's only friend and ally. I loved how uncomfortable the car ride back was for Rinna, after she'd bagged the solo ride with EJ, she finds herself drunk with sourpuss not wanting to talk to her at all. So Rinna crawls into the back seat with her phone. This is one relationship which means way more to 1 person than the other. Rinna scampering after EJ like a bug eyed Mexican Crested makes me cringe.

Erika should have stayed back in the château. She's one of those people who imposes their mood on the entire group. If Erika isn't happy, she's going to let everyone know. The wine tasting (why go? With a migraine? ) lunch was pretty light and fun, but I still got the feeling that it was eggshells all around for the women, wondering if Erika was going to suddenly take offense at something and do the Excorcist impression she's perfected on Eileen and Teddi . I have some sympathy for Erika. It has to be taxing putting that hairpiece in every outing with Rinna's head lodged permanently up her ass. Rinna makes me cringe the way she's fawned over Erika for the last 3 seasons, running after her in heels on marble floor, sitting in her lap at meal times, alone in the van with her at the end of the tasting, beside her in the helicopter. For those playing the 'does Rinna eat? ' game : nothing at breakfast but 2 teacups. She passed the cheese at the tasting and I saw her make chewing motions during lunch, but I now think these are also part of the charade. There was a picked at pastry on a plate at lunch but I didn't see actual food go into her mouth. Rinna is REALLY going at LVP. She better hope this shot didn't miss because IF LVP comes back (and we know she's not at this point ) she's never going to let the stuff Rinna has said slide. Ever. And so it should be. I'd actually like to see that happen.

Ok, I rewatched the breakfast scene before the market. The spread looks divine : cheeses, croissants, porridge and berries and veges all in individual ramekins. Rinna has on her plate a pain au chocolate, surgically cut in half and doesn't look gnawed upon at all. At this stage, Erika has the same thing, no surprise there. All the women ate. Except Rinna. Because next scene, Pasha walks in and Rinna's plate is completely empty. I smelled a rat immediately because there's no way she'd do more than pick a few flakes off a chocolate croissant. Then there's a brief shot that shows plates at lap height between Rinna and Erika. And THAT is where Rinna's 'breakfast' ended up. I'm going to start playing the 'does Rinna eat ' game. I honestly believe this one would do anything for fame or infamy. Nothing is off limits. Amelia the Anorexic! Amelia the Anorexic Activist! If Rinna could make bucks off tips for the pro Ana community, i would BET she'd write a guide more comprehensive than the tacky sex tips thing she was blaring about a couple of seasons ago. Can't abide this woman

'Pardon our French ' would be believable if these bitches had any class. I've been meaning to say this forever, and a big call out here to The Countess and Ramona 'turtle time' Singer : SO many of them never say 'please ' when ordering. Kyle 'Can I get another Margarita when you get a chance? ' Rinna 'I want a Vodka Tonic ', Erika 'I will have a cappuccino ' Then Rinna says 'i just wanna say 1 thing..' By this time, I'm hollering 'how about PLEASE you rude entitled sock puppet! !!'

Bless your heart @VagueDisclaimer So glad to hear that. The crew can get back to turning on one another. As long as the guests are fed properly, i can enjoy this shitshow!

Only just watched this and haven't caught the comments here yet. Did anyone notice just how fckn hot it was as the beach picnic got rained out? 39 degrees Celsius is pretty much unliveable. I wouldn't be wanting to eat those cold toasted sandwiches on a rocky beach. I'd be in the salon in the aircon. Wait. There's aircon, isn't there? On a mega yacht? Sounds like Mila doesn't know there's a difference between baking powder and baking soda. I bake for a living and another thing you don't do is get cavalier with your measurements. A tumbler isn't a cup in a recipe. She probably put Tablespoons instead of teaspoons of baking soda and if that cake had not been in a sheet pan, I doubt it would have risen and it'd have tasted like soap. And yet. She wanted to serve it. Mila was lying or uncomfortable when talking to toothy Jack about living in Paris to pursue her dream of culinary school. She got all shifty in the eyes. And Good God she's serving tinned shrimp and tinned crab. Why not call it a day and order in a truck load of what we call in Australia 'seafood extender /crab/fish stick '. The next charter are obviously more discerning, imagine that nachos being served to that bunch of high maintenance women? I see Mila getting shitcanned next episode. We saw someone getting fired and Sandy's words were 'your position is now redundant '. If Anastasia is in the Galley, then Mila is redundant. Goodbye Mila. Go take a sensitivity course before you sojourn beyond the borders of your home country.

Karen Huger's back fat is giving Kyle Richards' a run for its money! I paused when Karen and Candiace had their heads together to compare the turbans. They look exactly the same but the fabric and color differs. I'm still asking 'why?!' though. Really not appreciating Robyn's do this season because it often looks greasy to me. Notice how Robyn is only on time if she's not required to dress up. Like for the gator trip. I'm with the voodoo man 'she had SURGERY so her hands don't sweat? !' about Katie. Katie seems medicated or nuts to me. I don't know which. Loving New Orleans, a place that I dream of visiting. Loved that they featured Sazerac and Jambalaya and some gratuitous 2nd lining. Something was off about Gizelle's ex boyfriend's head. Actually, same with Shermann. The photo of Gizelle's mother back in the day? I could really see the resemblance between them in it as opposed to now. Karen Huger's terrible braided wig should be auctioned off. Didn't she ask one of her assistants to braid it before we left for this trip? He wasn't happy about the request and this is the result. Don't ask again, Karen, he's pissed with you!

I will watch no matter what. I'm in Australia, so I also watch Cheshire, Auckland, Toronto, Melbourne and Sydney. I can't not watch! I really don't care about LVP leaving. Because I know I'll see her in Vanderpump Rules, where you get just enough of her, Ken, Villa Rosa and the pets. Her tenure in RHOBH has come to a natural end. None of it occurred in a fair manner, but I have had the feeling for many seasons now that LVP is only giving us what she wants us to see, and it's her that has more control than she should of the SLs. The other hos are resentful of this but can't break the 4th wall on the show to claim that LVP is handled with kid gloves by her production team, for example. Apparently this was part of the reason LVP'S nose has been so out of joint this season : she was suddenly assigned a new team that didn't know her and wouldn't cater to her foibles etc (this was reported numerous times on Tamara Tattles ). I detest Lisa Rinna and believe she's responsible for much of the pot stirring regarding LVP. Rinna has crossed LVP and has had multiple failed attempts at coming for her and others, like Yolanda and Kim R. It was very much in Rinna's interest to continue to fuel the megaboring Puppygate SL. Dorit didn't want to continue with it nor Teddi (because Ms Accountability lied after telling us she never did ) nor LVP. Yet, it was with us all season. We will all eventually look back at this season in bewilderment that we exchanged an authentic BH housewife, married, successful, beautiful real estate etc for shyster, accent thief Dorit with her Beverly Beach swimwear and athleisure line that she's so in debt for that she is chased around a pool by a friend of one of her creditors demanding an explanation whilst the cast are filming in an exotic location, her Mr Potato Head husband and their bogus rental house. That's what I'll always wonder about. I don't want to see anymore Erika/Erika Jane as she's also strictly controlling what we see of her and even though they all do this, there is a real lack of authenticity about Erika, evidenced by her book and the uncomfortable experience her ghost writer (Brian Moylan ) had as a result. Rinna has glommed on to Erika so slavishly also that I am constantly cringing. I never want to see Rinna's daughters again and those girls getting their own THs last season was not a good decision. They need to be tending to their dysfunction. Having Lisa Rinna as a parent cannot be easy. I still don't want to see them. I wouldn't stop watching, but I'd come close if Kim Richards ever gets a diamond again. I find her unendurable. She's so obviously unwell that none of her SL can ever be authentic. Plus, not married either. These ARE supposed to be 'housewives ' still, no? Living in BH? I don't believe Kim lives in BH either. This fact may be why Kyle was so upset seasons ago that her sister moved so far away : this show at least gave Kim an income, provided she was a BH housewife. I don't mind Brandi G coming back but I felt stronger about that when she looked like marrying the wealthy guy she was dating a couple of years ago. Not so sure today now that she's looking so rode hard and put away wet. I do like Brandi and she definitely copped LVP'S wrath for outing her about those pesky selling stories rumours again. Looks like Brandi wasn't lying. Someone like Heather Dubrow would work well. Denise could be good but I hope she tires of telling us about her husband's penis and sexual predilections and name dropping Charlie every single freaking episode. I'm also still waiting for her real life to be more juicy than the tabloids? That hasn't happened yet either. If this was the only show LVP appeared in, I'd be more concerned about losing her. But it isn't and she plays a similar role in VPR. I'm utterly sick and tired of her new kitchen though and already need a remodel.

I heard Deedee interviewed by Kate Casey just this week. Tracked down living in the Pacific north west somewhere. Everytime I see Camille film with 1 of her friends, i wonder what happened to Deedee. Turns out there's no friendship there at all. She was some kind of makeup artist for Camille, and we were never told that in Season 1. I remember the dinner party from hell and Camille being bounced from her own apartment in NYC due to another Mrs Grammar being in residence. And Camille sobbing into Deedee's eyes about how this other woman is ruining a family. Deedee in the hot tub when Camille owns up to her Messiah Complex, Deedee was with Camille pretty much everywhere she filmed like that Sober Living / Celebrity Rehab woman, Jen, was with Brandi G. I admit to being naive enough to still feel astonished that Camille and Deedee aren't really friends. So Kimber is also probably a warm blooded minion kept around by Camille for the sake of veracity. So happy to see Brandi G finally getting some recognition for the allegations she (and the dreaded Cedric ) have made about LVP'S long term shady shit. Not that I believe any of these women aren't selling or giving away tips and stories to stay relevant. Lisa Rinna, I would bet, being the biggest offender.

In the preview, I heard the return of Hannah's anxiety attack voice! Collie. Joao is not his friend as evidenced by the out of character mid school 'feeding the rope ' behavior. I also hope his parents visit again.

Don't know if anyone has mentioned this yet but production is being shady as shit with the 'chef' - who, btw looks and sounds EXACTLY like Perla from RH o Cheshire - a couple of times they flash up a photo while the Chef is describing her experience and if you look, there is a dead chicken with head draped over a bowl in the background! In the foreground, there's just some produce arranged in a bowl. Then they make sure and capture all the premade crap she uses from Old El Paso tacos to old ranch dressing to Passata out of a bottle AND the tinned corn and preshredded cheese. They get her coughing from the moment we see her, maybe that's a symptom of the food poisoning she claims to have but why she's permitted near food at all AND on camera is the big question. The foie gras burgers were on the line, just, of acceptable yacht fare. The abortion she served for dinner? No freaking way, as everyone here agrees. The other photos we see of Mila's chef fare all look like stock photos you get googling 80s nouveau cuisine. Totally unlike the obvious instagram work of Chef's Ben and Adrian. I wonder if they'll bring Chef Adam back from last season? Mila is Sandy's problem. Sandy was vocal in telling us that she was so excited about hiring Mila because of her training. Looks like training may be all she's had. Despite Mila's own comments about how Sirocco is a badly organised yacht. It looked like she was provisioning for the entire charter season. Not just 3 days. All of her timings were totally off. Mila behaved as though she'd never actually cooked for a sit down dinner before. Those steaks! I could have cried, and I don't eat steak!

Since WHEN is Colin, of all people, Joao's 'best friend and partner in crime '? I think Joao was on the scene when Ross from BD was arrested in Florida. Colin would have been tucked up in bed at his parent's house. The same ones that visited him on charter last season. While he was pining for Brooke, Joao's girlfriend. I really doubt Joao and Colin are besties and hopefully we aren't going to need a fake friendship SL.

Which is the greatest of Kyle's many many fears this week, I wonder?

Katie and her illfitting reunion dress continues to be a smug bully. BUT I cannot with her husband and all his excuses for never manning up and taking responsibility for anything. I'd be making comments about his dick too, by now. Shifting the responsibility for James' invitation onto Sandoval : i loved production for rolling Schwartz ' actual words 'I'd really love for you to come ' which he'd just denied. Shifting the blame subtly back to his wife for 'thinking enough time had passed '. And the aw shucks, I'm just a nice guy routine. Schwartz is a real pill. Maybe he deserves Katie, maybe not but I'm officially done giving him any kind of pass with the nice guy doofus routine any longer. Sandoval at least tried to stand up for James and even brought up coke allegations as his FRIEND, which was an amazing job given the hate flying at James from pretty much everyone else. Schwartz hasn't got the gumption to stand by anything or anyone except his wife, and he constantly lets us know he's terrified of her, which is just another pathetic excuse for remaining spineless. He makes Katie look like a bully. I don't think she is necessarily in her marriage and it's annoying because she certainly is elsewhere. What does Katie actually bring? She's better get knocked up soon because she has very little else going on compared to some of the cast. I found her dismissal of the idea that Girls Night continue utterly arrogant and entitled and only about getting even with James. She obviously feels very comfortable with herself to outright defy LVP'S expectations that she'd naturally want to continue working and building that event. I wonder how LVP feels about being stuck with that attitude now that Katie is a 'wife of' one of her partners. LVP didn't look at all comfortable to me in this last section of the reunion. That red sequinned get up wasn't flattering either especially when she had to get up to chase James down.

If Lala hadn't scored herself 'My Man Rand', she'd be running as thirstily as DJ Muppet Baby and his 'Bambi Eyed Bitch'. Her Accountability Coach shtick is really brazen coming from someone who went ballistic all over Sur and who sucks on a baby bottle for anxiety and dick for PJs. DJ Muppet Baby is a budding narcissist who needs to pull up and get serious help FAST. His breaking down and whining like a kicked puppy with LVP routine is not cute. He thinks it is and it's not working, so he'll eventually evolve it. But it's indicative of the disorder : he rereverts to the age he was when damage was done to his personality by those horrorshow parents of his. The whole looking away and rolling his eyes at both LVP and Lala are him BARELY restraining himself from flipping out. I don't envy Raquel at all. He's a damaged unit. He will never really understand consequences as they pertain to his actions. Jax is another one.