yorklee2

While I see where your going with this Ben is 26 now, which would make him 36 in ten years. Hardly what I would call middle aged. 20 years would be more accurate.

I have to agree with this. Or at least to how this appeared to look. Ordinally I would be really turned off by this and to me this is a prime example of why I couldn't warm up to her for so long. After seeing her genuine human almost child-like reaction to Ben's, "I love you" though I don't think she meant any harm by it.I think she was just riding a natural high created by Ben's words and it was hard for it not to show. Remember the pig swimming date when she (and the others) were bummed out over Ben's obvious preference for Lauren? I think she felt she had been taking a back seat to Lauren the entire time and it felt good to show her new found confidence. Kind of mean yeah but I think a human reaction. Personally I feel like Lauren had been getting a wee bit smug herself over her front runner status. When JoJo asked her if she was feeling confident I think she was trying to gauge how Lauren's date went but at the same time I think part of it was just genuinely trying to make conversation in that long awkward wait for Ben. Honestly I feel like I would like them both in real life for their own distinct personalities. Lauren is sweet and her and Ben seem suited for each other but we have to remember that JoJo is most likely going to be crushed in the next couple of weeks so I'm not that put out by letting her have her moment.

I had to look up what, "vocal fry" was since I confess I didn't know what the term meant. Now I understand and yes that's exactly what she has! The examples I saw sound exactly like her.

Exactly, and we have always seen the changes as the previous season's contestant goes on to become the lead. Sometimes for better, sometimes for worse, or a little of both. The very stress of trying to handle and date 25 or so men would be sure to bring out more instances of that flash of temper we saw. I had never thought of this being the possible reason for Caila's distance. Thanks for pointing that out. It makes so much sense. She was always gracious and polite with everyone, (I even noticed on the river raft ride when her and Ben stepped out she took the time to tell the navigator, "nice to meet you". Remarkably nice manners yes but could it also be another example of wanting to please everyone? If so then it makes me even more so want her to find someone who genuinely loves her.

I agree. Plus the producers are sure to work in plenty doses of drama. They always find a way especially if they think the lead is perceived as boring. So I say give me the authentically nice lead and see what happens because there's always going to be people upset with something about whoever they pick. They're fake, mean, boring, to wimpy, to callous,..etc. Take your pick. Personally I don't like a cold calculating lead. Plus aesthetically Caila is beautiful.

Excellent summary LuckyLondon. I think that's what happened also and it makes sense. I too don't understand all the upset because he slept with all 3 women in that it happens on this show all the time. I posted as much way up thread. I do agree that the fact he told both ILY was a dumb move. I think that's what has most viewers upset but I think he really believes he loves them both (for the reasons you excellently stated) and only realized afterwards what a mess he had created. He was dumb and immature but I don't think he intended to be callous.

I didn't even notice the shoes but yeah with that dress she should have been wearing beach sandals. I think too that it needed a thin belt or some sort of wrap at the waist and slightly more fitted. The wind got under it as she was walking up making it billow out. It looked almost as if it were maturity wear. It made her look huge in that instant.

Yes I noticed that too. Plus the fact that those shorts were way too short and barely there. Other posters have stated how her and Caila were both wearing "booty" shorts but although Caila's were short they did cover her rear and fit her so much better. Lauren's looked too little for her like she was trying to wear a size too small. Not a good look.

I so agree with you on this Judyobscure. If I had to live my life by some rules book I would go insane. Be yourself. If you use some kind of "technique" that's not you then your true self will eventually emerge anyway and the he would be like, "she was so different when I first met her". Be yourself and let a man except you for who you are. I think so too. This was the first time I saw what seemed like genuine emotion from JoJo and it made her so much more appealing and likeable. Ben may have been acting/lying but I did not get a fake or acting vibe from her.

Unless Lauren is a very good actress I just don't see that scenario happening. She looked and acted a little unsettled to me at the rose ceremony when she realized JoJo seemed so happy and then Ben said something to the effect that he sent Caila away because he cared for two women and Caila wasn't one of them. She had to wonder then that maybe they're relationship wasn't as solid as she thought. Of course she realized there was one other woman left but I think in her mind she thought it was just part of the process and she had it in the bag. But for Ben to say he cared for two women. He didn't have to say that. He could have said the usual blah,blah,blah that's said at the rose ceremonies. Unless he really did care for them both. At least that's what I would have been thinking if I was in Lauren's shoes. If she's not acting and he didn't tell her beforehand than I think that was a slip of the tongue on his part. Even if she initially didn't think much about it seeing the satisfied look and glow on JoJo's face had to make her wonder. They even showed next weeks clips of her saying she had doubts and she believed you could love two people at one time. So I don't believe he told her beforehand.

I don't know if I would call it valley girl. Amanda to me had more of that going on, "I mean like, he wasn't, like there for me, but like I tried to, like make it work." I have noticed that Lauren stresses her S's though. That's kind of irritating.

I saw the tears. In one shot they were laying against her lashes getting ready to fall. No they weren't running down her face but as you said she most likely wiped a lot of them away. Most people would and your right everyone doesn't cry the same way (as in copious amounts). They may have been more from anger or regret but I think in this "bach bubble" I believe she felt she loved him and they were tears of hurt also. I believe they were real tears. Speaking of "bach bubble" someone stated how could smart, educated women like these women fall for a man this quickly in that short amount of time. I think they know the premise of the show going in but think it won't happen to them and their in control.Then they get in there and it's way more intense then they realized. I also don't think you can gauge a person's intellect by their emotional responses. Two separate things. I once read a true story of a women who was a medical doctor, (who one would assume is pretty intelligent) who ended up marrying a guy who had already killed his previous wife. One would argue why couldn't she have sensed or knew that about him beforehand. Of course after she married him he slowly started changing from the great guy she thought she had married. Long story short, it happens. Obviously Ben's not a murderer but I used that for an example of how even intelligent people's minds and emotions can be manipulated.

No I don't think it's the implants per se, (although I'm sure Ben loved them) but more so the dynamics and chemistry that's been between these two since the start. Also she strikes me as a sensual confident women. I read somewhere that the author Isabel Allende said that a women's true erotic/turn on body area was her ears. Specifically, " if a man wants to know how to turn a woman on forget the g-spot. Tell a woman you love her, she's gorgeous,...etc. Words. Tell her what she longs to hear". All the real players instinctively know this. I think when Ben told her he loved her (and God knows what he said in the FS) it sparked something in her. Just my opinion.

Agree. Yes Ben did a shitty thing sleeping with Caila when he knew he wasn't going to pick her but come on how many times has this happened on this show. The fantasy suites are a essential part of it. The women knew it going in. One could always argue in Ben's defense that we don't know 100% what happened in Caila's fantasy suite. She could have declined and that may have contributed to her being ousted. Which would really make Ben a douche bag but I don't think that's what happened. I think she did and that's why she came back to confront him. In real life a shitty move regardless. Realistically on this show par for the course.

Yes you may and I second that. She's had moments when it looked freshly colored and styled but then it always goes back to that unfortunate mess. She seemed more off this episode than others. Bad fashion choices also.

JoJo never looked more beautiful or seemed more real and genuine than she did tonight. I related so much when she was slightly incredulous that Ben loved her too. I could see myself feeling the same way. Her fashion on this show was incredible. She looked sexy, laid back, and glamorous all in one. She was all around enjoyable tonight. When Ben told her she looked so, "cute" was when I bought that he was realizing he loved her too. He used the same word with Lauren early on. I think it's his go to word when he's really starting to fall for someone. He's known he loved Lauren for awhile and it was so incredibly obvious for so long and tonight made it even more so. Caila broke my heart. She is obviously a very guarded person and had reservations for so long and when she finally let her walls down she was crushed. It absolutely felt real to me. You could tell when she went to see him spontaneously that she really cared for him and was so giddy. That was brutal to see that outcome. I really wish he would pick JoJo over Lauren. Honestly I didn't think anybody stood a chance over her until now. He's always had a deep affection for JoJo but the fact that she jumped from that to "he loved her" says a lot about his attraction to her. Dare I say she "rocked his world" in that fantasy suite? I think so. I think that adds a lot to why he's so torn. Not saying that he has only a physical attraction. They already had the friendship. In my opinion JoJo blew Lauren out of the water tonight. No wonder he's torn. Poor Lauren where did she get that frumpy dress she wore to the rose ceremony? It was not flattering at all. And those barely there shorts on her date? Bad choices. So I hope he picks JoJo but I don't think he will. I prefer Caila as the next B'ette but after tonight I'll be ok if JoJo gets it. Either way I have cautious hopes it will be a good season.

Sorry but in Caila's defense I've never saw one example of her crying and acting out when things didn't go her way. There was that one instance early on when as she was talking to JoJo she cried realizing how difficult the competition was going to be but I would hardly call that not getting her way. If anything I think she's been very guarded with her feelings. Her calling her parents "mommy and daddy" gave me pause but I think she's just very close to her parents and that's what's she's comfortable calling them. I think the fact that she cried talking to them was because she felt totally comfortable letting her guard down with them. She gets along well with the other ladies (and remember she wouldn't rat out the women who were upset with her getting the second 1 on 1 date in the Bahamas) and has showed poise and graciousness in my opinion. Now she may totally change if she were to be the B'ette but then again she may be pleasantly surprising. She at least deserves the spot as much or more so than JoJo.

Caila would be your pick for F1 or the next B'ette? Because if you meant the next B'ette than you do realize that if JoJo goes home next week that would most likely eliminate Caila's chances. I would rather see Caila as the next B'ette but your reasoning on JoJo's going home next week kind of worries me for Caila's chances because I don't see the TB shunning JoJo's family at all. They would be reality tv gold and would be assured to bring the drama and we all know how much this show loves drama. Based on Ben's reactions throughout the season though I believe he has a stronger connection to JoJo so I think she will be his second choice.

Thanks for the information Saber. The ABC message board just posted a message saying they were shutting it down and that was that. So glad I found this site. I love to read others comments and participate. You nailed it!

Yes welcome hyacinth. I just joined the board last year. I love it here. Hope you will as well. Can I ask, what is TWoP? I used to occasionally post on the ABC message board but they shut that down last year. Is that what you are referring to? I actually like this site much better.

Really? I don't see that at all. I think Caila has a lovely smile. Actually I think that's probably her best feature after her beautiful hair. Go figure...

Haha...yes what a relief Feel the same about Stephanie's recap. I always enjoy her comedic take on the shows. I can see where someone would maybe be slightly put off if it were one of us regular posters but that's the whole point of Stephanie's recaps. Their meant to be snarky. Yes it's a out-dated word and I've actually used it with friends in a teasing way with no offense taken. It really has to be taken in context.

I think it was Lauren who mispronounced library wasn't it? When she took Ben to the whiskey "liberry". Ditto on Amanda's shirt. What a unfortunate choice. Speaks really to her immaturity in my opinion. If she was going for cute she missed the boat. Slightly off the shoulder would have been much better. Better yet a light weight top with a more flattering color.

Honestly I can't tell who the other one is he tells he's loves since I don't see that much of a connection with either one. At least nothing like what we see with Lauren. He's always seemed to have a easy close connection with JoJo but her family could damper that. With Caila her family was much more normal and welcoming but I just don't see any connection that he would call "love". I don't seem to remember him giving Caila's parents any more reassurances than he gave JoJo's family. I just don't read love with either one of those two but I do see more of a affection for JoJo possibly. I'm hoping he picks JoJo as the second choice though because at this point I think Caila would make the better B'ette and if she's F2 then that would effectively eliminate her chances.

I can certainly see there may be exceptions to leaving your children for a extended period as in work, military,,etc and even then I would have reservations and it wouldn't be easy. To go on a tv dating show, no. I think that's what people are objecting too and most reasonable people know the difference.