humbleopinion

Johnny’s 2 Unfiltered appearances have been so disheartening that his fan bench was set ablaze like Burning Man. Either our chain is being yanked hard or the writing’s on the proverbial wall…and we didn’t even make it through their first full day of the honeymoon. We drown our sorrows with fudge….as a salute to Johnny’s pillow talk with Bao. Why fudge? Wait for it....

Hate to say it but Brett is kind of a self defeating mess… Not that any of her foibles alone are deal breakers but it is just head shaker after head shaker that is pointing Ryan down Nope Avenue. Only 3 days into the marriage and Ryan is slow walking backwards towards the exit. Ryan with his dead eye thousand yard stare and milque toast, good ol’ boy, golfing frat dude persona still makes him a eligible pot looking for his lid. Life is not fair. He’ll be a good stepdad to a nice divorcée and she will make him Dad when they have their baby to unify the cobbled together family.

Not that MAFS is any deeper than a wet spot on hot pavement but this cast (Bao, Johnny, Myrla, Gil, Rachel and Jose) of first generation born of immigrants illustrates how differently adults who grew out of childhood poverty, trauma, abandonment choose to live their lives, after pulling themselves up with education or with Gil, civil service. Zach’s parents are a doctor and a lawyer. Info on Michaela’s parents unknown.

I can confirm that Johnny’s 4 grandparents came from 4 different areas of China and his Mother, Anh and his estranged father were both born in Vietnam.

Correct me if I'm wrong but isn't the trend having either: a small throw rug or hair free so matchy matchy is not a thing..

Imma gonna mention how adorbs the flower girls were dressed, the jewels in their done up hair at Rachel's and Myrla's weddings. I wished they showed more of the receptions, they actually looked fun! Betcha there was polka dancing at Ryan's reception...nothing like stomping and hoofing it at breakneck speed around the dance floor arms pumping by someone's drunk uncle or handsy aunt.... Other dances you need in your quiver when invited to wedding in Texas... Brett's Dreaded Two Step Foxtrot Waltz Chicken dance (the kids and seniors love it) Shuffles Line dances Slides Cumbias Money Dance (bring crisp fresh $20 if a friend, $50 or $100 if you are a relative) Pin on their wedding clothes to get a dance and face time with the bride or groom You start dancing as a kid with your cousins, sibs, your parents, family friends, your aunts and uncles so by the upteenth wedding you attended in your formative years everyone pretty much knows how to dance... Shocking/disappointing to go to weddings where it is just grinding and lame-o swaying dancing

Myrla deserves love but to trot out her impoverished rough start childhood and unimaginable family tragedy for a basic cable show is just not right. She should have never been cast. Exploiting human suffering is low. She gets a pass from me for her moods, her hissy fits, her nattering criticisms because she walked out a survivor from circumstances that she had no control over. But her flannel lumberjack gowns are still snark bait. She bought 6...one for each night of her honeymoon.... If she has to lavish purses, shoes, designer clothes, facials, weekly lashes on her psyche then so be it. Too bad for Gil who got a raw deal and married a woman who wants to but can never trust a man to share a life.

Unfiltered: Jose, Michaela, Johnny, JamieO Finally, a lively panel thanks to all 3 cast members getting the memo to be animated and be able to laugh at yourself. Johnny and Michaela are no holds barred emotionally, embracing the cringe with Jose dipping his toe cautiously into the pool. Jose channeling Tom Jones….heavy crucifix on a chain, unbuttoned to the waist shirt and zipped ankle boots. Jose and Michaela may share a waxer but couldn’t find the technician’s signature hairy heart left on his (over) exposed chest like Michaela reports she has on her lady parts. Find out Zack knows where “town” is and Johnny and Anastasia Grey share a favorite ice cream flavor. Gonna give JOtis props for a good episode of Unfiltered, but it was Michaela and Johnny that brought the juice.

Five pairs of newly wed strangers are whisked away to the Florida Keys and begin the journey of learning who they’ve just married; while one groom learns that his bride is very hard to please, another couple’s honeymoon is over before it ever begins.

That part of Texas was an old stomping ground in my misspent youth...🤠 Folks say PairLand or you can say pehr·land like the fruit because it has agricultural beginnings. Just texted my amigo who still lives there, they do not pronounce it Pearl-land. The only Pearl commonly known in south Texas is Pearl Beer. https://www.pearlandtx.gov/residents/about-pearland/pearland-history Just don't pronounce Houston like the good people in New York City pronounces their Houston

https://www.instagram.com/p/CSXahl_JCsI/ Bao's uterus climbs higher up through her abdominal area into her thoracic cavity, hiding behind her lungs........

Gil is a Coach Carrie Backpack…sturdy, functional, no frills Johnny is red Hermes Birkin or maybe a Chanel bamboo handled bag…classical, little flashy, clean design Zach is a Louis Vuitton Nano Lockme Bucketz…fun, young, on trend Jose is a Kate Spade bought online at Costco.com…budget minded, popular design 5 years ago Ryan is a Collins purse...if you know what these iconic Texan purses are then howdy neighbor...🤠

G. Stud- Lucky you found your happy place. Know lots of ex Texans who land on their feet in LA. Spread out like Houston, it is warm but without the humidity and mosquitos. No good Tex Mex food in LA, unfortunately and why the hell not? Myrla's story line will be that an abused, poor girl grew up into affording and paying for her own Marie Antoinette lifestyle because she can't find her King Louis....

Jenga! Myrla is snotty. Looking through her double fake lashes down her nose at the everything and everyone on MAFS. She wore her coveted 9K wedding dress on camera...that's all she cared about. Betcha she waves her credit card to upgrade her plane seat to at least Business Economy, leaving Gil and the others in the cheapo seats. Wonder if she will do the same for her honeymoon lodgings...skip over to the spoiler thread...

https://play.mylifetime.com/shows/married-at-first-sight/season-13/episode-4 MAFS Season 13's Marie Antoinette is not happy with the honeymoon quarters.... Reigning in her flannel lumberjack gown, her Highness is displeased....

You have an obvious fondness for Houston even though y'all left it in your rear window....ex🤠 Cleaning up on Aisle 3 at the HEB..... Rachel is a 5th grade teacher who lives in Rosenberg and teaches in the Galleria area and is married to her bearded (double meaning intended) shortie rocket man.... Gonna give Rachel props for dropping 35 pounds since getting dumped from her last soul sucking relationship only 6 months previously. If she didn't have bad luck then she'd have no luck at all....poor girl is married to the man she insulted in the worst way...dissing his Looks which he translates into she is not (sexually) attracted to him. That hurtful ego boo boo will cost her honeymoon sex and bjs.... Myrla must have thought she gonna get a man who worships at her Loubo feet on MAFS....girl didn't do her homework (she teaches principals leadership...jokes are writing themselves) because none of those have been cast on MAFS except Doug and he has chronic joblessness and Bobby and even he put Danielle on an eyebrow budget. Ryan, the oil man looks/dresses/acts exactly like the other oil men you meet at the Happy Hour on Friday in Galveston...except he isn't married and from Kansas City...Missouri and Kansas. Ryman's personality has yet to be seen, the field cameras in his face makes him clam up. Ryan grew up going to his grandparent's place but other than dove and deer hunting with the family he rather golf. Brett's shushing Ryan was an annoying reflex, the teacher in her slipped out, no harm no foul because of her nice chesticles.

When Johnny asked Bao what was her most recent spending splurge she told him she bought the Jimmy Choos she was wearing on consignment.

Brett is from New Jersey but considers Texas her home... Well, Cowgirl, just don't be calling yourself a Texan....your new in laws won't look too kindly on that.... No one calls it Picante sauce since they made this commercial in the 90's.

I meant to write 136 pounds. Thanks for the catch.

When Brett came out of the bathroom to find Ryan bare chested in bed... I wish Ryan had said Skeeter, your titties were out at the wedding and reception, mine are going to be out for the whole honeymoon....

Rachel is a teacher, having finished her 7th year teaching 5th graders in 2019.... She went to U of H. Average Yearly salary for HISD educators just under 52K/year. Height 5 feet 6.5 inches (half inch and more taller than her hubby) 36kg in weight( less than Jose) ^^^ Correction 136 pounds.

Crowd on the Johnny Lam Bench *gasps* collectively and fumble some of our snacks and treats....😮

Mr. World Wide has more confidence in the tip of his pinky ringed finger that Jose could ever imagine to possess....his insecurities about his nose, forehead, height, constant neediness to be patted on the back for buying 2 homes with no debt, graduating from college/grad school, landing a NASA job, blah blah blah is going to kill Rachel's libido.....

Gotcha...just taking another opportunity to dis Jose's Lilliputian stature.... Brutus knew he could beat up Popeye...but for that damned can of Spinach that showed up with much musical fanfare just at the last second....only then could Popeye rescue Olive Oyl and beat down Brutus

Brutus was at least 6 foot tall. The more snacks the merrier.....welcome Jose's cryptic creepy way of asking when her lease in Rosenberg was up and what area she worked sounded like he was getting too Invisible Man and is diabolically planning to keep Rachel captive in his locked compound.... Jose is a flight specialist at NASA Clear Lake which is only a 20 minute drive from where he grew up in Pearland, TX. Thinking his houses are also in Pearland and Mama lives in one and he lives or rents out the other.... Rachel said she works in the Galleria area and that can be an hour commute to and from Pearland during Houston's crushing commuter traffic unless she pays to drive on the toll road and Jose is probably too cheap pinching pennies for her to have a transponder. Jose will not be happy living in the group apartment complex with the other brides and grooms because his commute will be longer than normal.