Oldernowiser

Every time I see the barndemonium stuffed with all that crap I start to itch and hyperventilate a bit. One of the reasons the kids have those dark circles under their sunken eyes might just be allergies. It’s a former barn full of dusty crap that has insufficient heating. It’s not like they’re going to air it out. Makes my nose itch just thinking about it. Poor, dumb Tim. It won’t matter, dude. You’ll commit some other tiny accidental slight to the BESTEST MAMA EVER any second now and you’ll be back on the shit list. Save your money.

Me, too. My mom and sister, both size 7 1/2. Lucky bitches. As long as I’m just babbling, I have found the world’s best diet aid. Netflix started airing “The Great British Bakeoff” holiday specials and while I do admire their civility, lovely accents, and the extraordinary effort they put in, the actual products make me never want to eat sugar again. Two episodes and all I can think about is a steak and a glass of water. Maybe some broccoli. 🤢

And while I’m at it, what’s up with the fact that men’s shoes ALWAYS come in multiple widths but women’s are most often “B” and that’s it??? I had wide, very high-arched feet at birth and now, thanks to years of dance lessons and then high heels in corporate life, my feet are a misshapen mess. I am always looking for sandals that disguise the front part of my feet. But it’s amazing how even brands that crow about comfort (Lands End, LLBean, Keen, Bare Claws, I’m looking AT YOU) only offer one width. Even running shoes, for pity’s sake. I’ve worn New Balance for years even though they don’t last very long because it’s so hard to find extra-wide shoes. And this concludes my festive rant on the sexism and cluelessness of shoe manufacturers everywhere. Merry Christmas Eve!

Wow, @jcbrown. That’s so...festive? I’m so sorry you’re going through all this stuff with your father on top of everything else. The last few months of my mother’s life were like that, with the falls and the phone calls. It’s so hard to know what you can do, even if it weren’t for Covid. I send you a hug.

Better yet, the whole April storyline could have been thrown in the trash before it ever started. It adds nothing but inexplicable drama and the kid as written is a charmless bot.

@Scarlett45, I don’t want to embarrass you, but I just want to say you really are one extraordinary individual. You handle more shit in a day than most do in a year, yet somehow you keep strong. 👏🏼

He’s being relatable. 🙄

The RFP is pissed off and pouting. The Helpmeet is trying to wheedle him out of it and wrangle a toddler. Such a fun memory! But, hey, yeah, California Girl, Happy Birthday. Love, Jessa. P.S. 😈

Hate, hate, hate. This show has become a never-ending festival of passive aggression while I snarl futilely at the screen. Lorelai’s pissed at Luke over the whole April The Charmless Twerp situation, with good reason, but is pretending she isn’t. Rory is pissed at Logan, with good reason, but is pretending she isn’t. The Gilmores are plotting to move to Stars Hollow, but are pretending they’re not. 😠😠😠😠😠😠😠😠 Years from now, when I look back, I believe it will be the moment when Lorelai just stood there while Luke prattled on about his plans to have April meet JESS of all people* that marked the end of my GG love forever. That and twerpy kids singing the periodic table on a school bus. That and another total bullshit washed-up celebrity cameo with the Real Paul Anka that went on for an eternity. Nothing good lasts forever. Sigh. * Lorelai, let me help you. The words you’re choking back are, “JESS???!!!! JESS???!!!! What the actual tap dancing fuck? Everyone in town has met her, now you’re taking the act on the road and yet somehow you’ve neglected to have her even say ‘hi’ to the person you think you’re going to marry????!!!” Now, see? Was that so hard?

You know, ever since I read that hate-filled excerpt of RFP’s sermon I can’t see anything about them or their family as being cute, let alone yet another baby. Hell, having babies is all they do. And it’s a fluffy cutesy front to keep the money coming in while they preach hatred behind closed doors. Feh. DTM.

To quote the incomparable @Zella, play stupid games, win stupid prizes. I just hope they didn’t infect anyone outside their circle of moronitude.

Not to get too far OT, but on our property we have about an acre of scrub trees, blackberries, and Scotch Broom (big fire hazard) that is on a nasty hill. My husband and I have taken turns over the last two years risking our limbs and potentially ugly encounters with our Territorial Jackass Neighbor to creep down there with a limb saw and tree loppers and whack away at it. Needless to say, Nature is winning. So today I found a service called Rent a Ruminant! They bring in a herd of goats and some herding dogs and apparently the goats can happily clear anything and you don’t have to figure out how to get rid of the cut stuff. Genius! So if Territorial Jackass would either stop trying to sell his house himself for 35% over market and GTFO or just resume spend his winters in Arizona, I can get these goats in and let them have at it! Back on topic...Jill. Feeding your kids rotten pumpkins is child abuse. And you have now ruined pumpkin pie for me.

Well said. I find the whole thing absurd. First of all, Amazon, Safari, and the credit card companies already know everything about me. Second, I am just not terribly interesting. Third, I have nothing to hide. Which begs the question as to what these anti-chippers are so paranoid about.

😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱 First off, I hope that photographer sues them for her medical expenses, lost wages and mental distress. Second, may this marriage end in a five-lawyer-pileup of an ugly, endless, expensive divorce.

I admit I am ignorant on this topic. I am quite content to remain so. But is there any way they’re making any money from these candy coated hatefests podcasts?

I find it hard to believe that your husband has been in jail for a month without charges being filed. He may have done a plea deal to avoid a trial, but he had to be charged with something and agree to the terms of his sentence. And no, nobody can do time for someone else. The cousin is full of it. What are your plans for when your husband is released?

Legally, I don’t think it matters what the relationship is if the guy’s been cashing rent checks, landlord /tenant laws apply, and he can’t kick you out without going through a legal eviction process. @beckie, google tenants’ rights where you live. Not to repeat myself, even though I am, tell your local domestic violence organization that you’re under threat of eviction. They should be able to set you up with some free or low-cost legal aid.

Why is her head twice the size of her entire torso??? Worse, he’s a smug moron. We need a new word...smugoron? Smoron? Morug? Moronug?

I side-eye Etsy’s “other people are looking at this” statistics. Same with eBay. I’ve seen too many things that supposedly a bunch of others are “watching” that somehow are still available weeks later. It’s just a FOMO sales tactic.

Or a return...😈

Ironically, I have never been accosted by anyone with a gun or a Bic lighter who demanded to know if I support gay rights. Which I do. However, I have been accosted several times by someone holding a Bible, getting in my face, and demanding to know if I’ve accepted Jesus Christ as my personal savior. Go figure.

This. He seems to get much more enthused by Cade or a new blazer than he does by Jinger, no matter how blonde she gets. Nothing nastier than a closet case with a pulpit. I have read this three times and it still makes no sense. If they’re counting on his preaching to get them by, they’re going to starve to death.

Wow. What an asshole.

@beckie, I know you weren’t all that happy with the domestic violence hotline people you talked to, but in my experience these sorts of services all depend on who you happen to talk to. Call them again and start using the word “eviction.” That may get you more backup. Whatever anyone tells you, always ask who else you can call. Also tell them about your technology challenges in trying to apply for jobs. You might also call the library and tell them why you need better computer access. You’re not just watching funny cat videos, you’re trying to change your life for the better. They should be happy to help with that.