rozen

Welp, that was random and hilarious. Cassidy's "grl srsly?" face when one of the pilots doused him in holy water was hilarious. Sucks when your coup de grace turns out to be hogwash! Wonder how Sarah dealt with the flaming helicopter full of dead bodies once she got home. Is she the end game Mary Sue that Preacher is supposed to work towards? Would be much more fun if murderous psychopaths just accepted they were made for other murderous psychopaths (Tulip!) instead of fifteen seasons of the main character getting only moderately less terrible, calling it a win, and pretending he's capable of having a functional relationship with a normal person. If the mom's fine with getting her shit pushed in, fine, but how can she have such disregard for her son? Or never bother to explain that this is what she wants, so he wouldn't try to save her and get a whupping? Hope Jesse calls CPS for that kid, he deserves better. I wonder if that nebbishy guy gutted himself because he interpreted things literally, or because Jesse was fed up with him and that influenced how the order was received? I don't think I'm ever going to be down for Kilgrave-like powers, even for a "good guy". Too dangerous.

I kind of love how Lucifer is the sniveling little brother to the urbane big bro Dracula. W00t, I was right that Dracula/Lucifer are two separate army commanders bearing down on Vanessa! One wants the soul, the other the body, interesting. I am 100% in the "here to watch Eva Green chew the scenery" so these episodes are The Best to me. This went a long way towards making me a little sympathetic to John Clare too, because I've given 0 shits about his whiny butt all 3 seasons. Ha, it was kind of easy to forget how kind and freaked out PL's character was while Vanessa was in her fugue state until she finally woke up and PL went back to being icy and business-like. She was like "oh yea, I guess I should bandage your 2nd degree burn now."

Agreed. Arya's personality is what made him interested in the first place, turning into A Girl would probably be a loss to him. Most of this entire exercise seems to be trying to teach her how to lie. Truly lie, down to the bones lie, to the point where even a Faceless Man can't tell. Not for her to completely commit to the process. It's going to take a superhuman effort for her to maintain her cover when she's face-to-face with someone like Cersei. Ok, that other trainee ratcheting up the difficulty was awesome. She was like "great, I can finally pummel you with my bare hands, getting your blood all over my knuckles is my favorite."

If you're too stupid to immediately gtfo when White Walkers cross your dreamscape, you pretty much deserve to die (imo). They've showed a few times that there are people in these flashbacks who seem to be more "sensitive" to Bran's attempted interference, e.g. Ned when he was charging up the tower to Lyanna. I don't think these are static instant replays, I think if Bran really wanted to he could probably influence the past and people who probably interpret it as a spirit or demon or whatever. The sister (forgot her name) screaming into Bran's dreamscape may have triggered young Hodor, who was sensitive to Bran's presence already. Ugh, has he spent his whole life wondering when that moment would come that he would die so horribly? If so, no wonder he'd freak out at random things, he knew his time was coming. And Bran just stands there confused like a bump on a log while all these people are screaming for him to help and dying to save him. Ugh, freaking Bran. I wonder what was up with the spear that killed that White Walker? That shouldn't have been enough to take him down, and the sister looked pretty shocked too. Does she have some special ability now? Ugh at Sansa taking LF's bait so easily. Yes, she needs to rally people to her and her legitimate name, because the North seems pretty patriarchal and they'd get over a bastard ruling them sooner than a girl Stark. But there's no reason to lie to Jon about what she's doing, he'd probably think carefully about how to present things to make as easy for her to take power as possible. But noooo, she reverts back to Southern backhand scheming, which she adroitly pointed out to Davos does not work up North. Yea, LF knew exactly what he was handing her off to, and is probably an expert at reassembling whatever pieces remain of that person into something he can manipulate. He looked nonplussed at how strong she still was. Those Northern girls are tough, did he forget Rose already? LOL at Daario being all "ugh, he's playing the I'm dying card. Now we'll never get rid of him." The new red priestess' comment about not flambaying "true" friends of Daenerys does not bode well. Y'all crazy. Welp, Yara's screwed. Hopefully Euron was too busy globe-trotting and didn't pick up much battle tactics, because that's pretty much all she has going for her. Her ships seem to run like well-oiled machines compared to standard issue. Arya's too old to get so worked up over a stupid play. What did she think? Ned would be portrayed as a noble hero while the Lannisters are still only a shipride and some vaelfire (sp) away? I was not ready for that zoom i n of a warty penis.

Didn't someone else on the show say they would burn wigs if they really hated someone? Or was that AB just plagiarizing herself? She should have tagged out and let Robbie or someone answer for her, that was a wasted opportunity she should have known was coming. Of all the wackiness on Trixie's face, she went for the nose contour? Like, c'mon, call her a walking 99 cent store kaleidoscope, something! <3 Trixie. Of course she would sell shirts in the parking lot first. She's a goddamn professional woman of grace and dignity, as Katya would say.

Interesting that Bob was the only one that actually danced during her lip sync. I think she's the most well-balanced queen of the three, and her painting will coalesce with time. I almost wish Chi Chi had made it somehow because she no doubt would have pulled out all the stops on her final lip sync. For some reason I thought Naomi could dance? Kim Chi gave glorious looks, but damn did Violet Chachki not shit on absolutely everybody. Like, damn girl. I love that Raja was like "f these bitches" and wore her favorite Madonna look after ripping everyone to pieces on Fashion Photo Review.

I can believe that Ramsay wouldn't want to screw around with a wildling. The show now has Bigger Enemies, but the wildlings were the no. 1 source of terror for a solid portion of the show. She's not bound by any honor code, is well trained as a fighter, knows Winterfell about as well as he does, and knows the north even better. Slitting her throat off the bat is like, the smartest thing he's done (imo).

Tsk Tsk, the commander of the Vale was actually trying to train Robin as if he had some wits, instead of cultivating his trust like LF did. He knows perfectly well what the game is, but refused to play it out of honor and would happily sneer at Robin the rest of his life is LF wasn't there to remind him how much he loves the Moon Door. You deserve to lose for being so dumb. Man, LF could ride all the way to the north, see Sansa married off, then ride back, and still be assured everything was still sitting in the palm of his hands. Varys better get Daenerys to Westeros asap, because I don't think there's anyone left with what it takes to stop him. Unless LF accidentally marches into a bunch of White Walkers, but knowing him he'll make a deal there too. I can't even with Missadrei (sp?) and Grey Worm. All they do is complain and they offer no solutions. It's frustrating because it feels like they've gutted Missandrei's character and turned her into a sulky (but fabulous) child. She's shown plenty of political acumen in past seasons and should know perfectly well that Danery's method was not working. They both must know that not only are the other slaver's cities back in business, but probably ten times more ferocious to squelch out what little hope the freed slaves had in them. Varys has always been one to work from the shadows, I wasn't surprised he didn't talk. They'll sneer at the dwarf who's a typical administrator plying them with coin and women, and they'll get their throats cut by the eunuch's spies. Perfect snare. Daario just did not get the reverence Jorah has for Dany, and kept trying to reduce it to some weird lust/fetish and attack it accordingly. Maybe he'll get it now. Hope she gets the other widows on her side to get the Dothraki in line, or else she just has an another enormous population of people who hate her moral code to wrangle. But, then again, she's doubtless going to send them out to sack every slaver's city between there and Mereen, so they should be loving her for a while. I found a little unbelievable that every Khal chose to frantically run for their lives right until the end, and not one tried to gut her and take her with them. Did Ramsay seriously threaten to slaughter the entire Night's Watch? Jeez, just open the gates and let the White Walkers have the place, as it seems every other family in the North is categorically horrible. Ramsay is legit not going to last long if he keeps indulging his impulses without heeding his father's warnings to punch down, dammit. I am so glad Osha went quick, I couldn't bear to watch her run the torture gauntlet. Margaery is made of steel, fangirling so hard. Poor Loras, he was never meant for greatness. Ugh, the High Council is about to get played by the High Sparrow. The one advisor who pretends to be frailer than he is had it exactly right. Ride it out. If Olenna calmed down for a minute she'd realize Margaery spent an enormous amount of effort cultivating the love of the people, they probably wouldn't respond well at all to her being forced to do a walk of shame. Which is probably why the High Sparrow has left her alone and kept hammering on Loras. He's weak, supported the usurper, and hasn't been discrete with his preferences. He's the perfect patsy, not her. Tormund legit already has names picked out for their babies. Ha, this trip is going to be hilarious.

The scrolls they were deciphering last season talk about Amunet and Lupus Dei as being a unit thwarting them through the ages. Maybe Hecate is wondering if this prophecy can break both ways, the brothers have been obsessed with obtaining Amunet so they can rule the darkness, but maybe seducing the Hound of God can have a similar effect? And if Ethan ever truly chose her, Vanessa would probably give her a chance, and Hecate would be closer to the Mother of Evil than anyone else has lately. I hate to say it, but I kind of agree with her chastising Ethan for being horrified at her swift administration of death. Ethan has been ineffectively restraining himself for years, and has been willing to sulk and brood over the consequences, but not do what was necessary to truly protect everyone around him. He was willing to put hundreds of people at risk on a monthly basis to keep his freedom, so yes, he can stuff his tears where the sun don't shine. Sparing two people when the sun's up and he's not particularly desperate means jack shit. Of course the solution to this is to probably to go throw himself in a river, not keep gallivanting with a gleeful murderess, but he's never excelled at smart decision making. Ugh, I can already see where Victor and Henry are going. Victor has his stupid smugpants back on, and is going to design an experiment to make a 100% angel, Henry will try it, and it will backfire (as with everything Victor does), leaving Henry stuck as Hyde full time. Seriously, Vanessa should pull the witchy scorpion trick on every person she thinks about trusting. Less heartbreak, more awareness than a malevolent undead force of evil is trying to seduce her. That peon was totally trying to warn her as best he could, I wonder who sent him? He paid for it in spades, jeez. Nothing good is going to come from John Clare being Vanessa's orderly, is there? I hope, whatever happens, they figure out a way to forgive each other because they are the most adorabs friends on the show. I bet Madam Bathory and Hecate started like how Lily and her little whelp are now. I smell a fight for supremacy coming, and Dorian's bored enough that he'll probably indulge it because honestly how many bloodbath orgies does it take for him to be over it? Not many, I'm guessing.

My theory is that Dracula and "Lucifer"* are the brothers, and that they're taking turns with their respective minions. Dracula tried vampires/psychological manipulation via Mina. Lucifer tried witches + psychological manipulation via possession. Now Dracula's back with a more personal touch. During Vanessa's flashback to when Mina was alive she narrated that Peter was weak, and that she loved him for that weakness. Then she tried to kiss him and declare herself, and he ran away as fast as humanly possible. I agree she's attracted to strength, but I think she's fond of weakness. She's at her most empathetic and merciful when others are at the end of their rope, possibly because that's the only time she feels like she can contribute something to help them. I think Vanessa is very leery of seduction right now, so it's very smart to go after her this way. Trigger her protective tendencies and worm your way into her heart. Just thought about it, wouldn't Ethan's dad just have to know that there would be a full moon between the train and when he'd be hauled back? He totally set up those bandits to die, didn't he? Hope they got some payment up front, because man that was a nasty way to go. *We don't know that's who he is, but whatever, shorthand!

Interesting, Ethan was ready to slit Katenay's throat, but also promptly told him exactly where he was when asked. The old lady at the inn who was apparently family seemed to hold him no ill either. Can't wait to see that relationship play out. Malcom has learned stranger danger the hard way over the last couple of seasons. Not surprised he would be cagey about loving Vanessa. Knew it was Dracula from the first season, glad they just confirmed it right away instead of playing coy. Obsessed with broken dead things, check. Love of adventure, but too fragile to go adventuring (just like Malcom's son), check. Awkward and bumbling, check. He's custom built himself to hit all of Vanessa's buttons. Why either of the fallen brothers didn't do this in the first place is beyond me. It's not like Vanessa is hard to figure out. Oh, Jekyll is terrifying. And stupid Victor. He's built up this elaborate fairytale out of Lily playing the hell out of him. She. Was. Never. That. Into. You. I need Caliban to come back if only to knock some sense into Victor. He's got the right kind of brooding personality to not fall for the sunshine playacting twice. Did the execs complain there weren't enough nipples last season? This episode was like boobs galore for no real reason. Whatever. There had to be a way to make the British detective seem clever without making everyone an idiot. "Oh, he's heading to his father's ranch? I suppose that would be a sensible place to start."

I guess this is puberty taking a number on the story, but Bran is too damn old to be throwing temper tantrums of this level. Before this you were being drug along in the snow, starving, trying desperately not to die, this is a major upgrade. The guy's talked about how geriatric he is every episode, you think Bran would catch a hint that maybe this mystical dude is gonna die soon and maybe he should stfu and learn the techniques. There's no way hand-holding a angsty teenager across history comes at no cost, it's probably wearing the poor guy out. Melisandre's face when she saw Jon breathing was hilarious. I guess she's all aboard the crazy-pants express again, can you imagine her chasing Jon all the way back to Winterfell? Though I'm pretty sure Jon will straight punch her out of she suggests he sacrifice Tormund et al. so she can power up again. Speaking of, I would pay good money to have Tormund's actor just growl out lines for audiobooks. Dude's hilarious and makes this marauding psychopath of a character seem like someone who would fireman's carry you home after drinking too much and tuck you in. After this jaunt, can Khaleesi go to Arya's murder school and get some skills already? It's like every story arc starts with her being degraded and her only defense is running her mouth with her longass name and titles. When has this ever worked? Literally never. Varys, showing why he's terrifying. I love how he would flit in closer to the spy, just to remind her of just how big he is and how he could pound her into the ground all by himself, then step back and complain about how heavy the bag of silver was. I'm pretty sure his birds in Westeros are just pulling double-duty now. No way they were filching up the info they were for in exchange for a knocked-off dad and some plums. Qyburn is underestimating Varys. Tywin's "you're not as clever as you think you are" continues to ring down through time onto both Lannister twins. Nothing stupider than continuing to snarl at Olenna when you know she's the ruling the place providing all your food. And neither of them apparently took the time to impart some of their viper-like paranoia into Tommen, who's swallowing the High Sparrow's bullshit hook, line, and sinker. Can literally nothing good ever happen to decent characters? Jesus, everyone's out here freezing their butts off and running for their lives while Ramsay gets served his greatest enemy on a platter. Ugh. I hate the way he was looking at Osha too. He's not going to fall for the hard sex then knock them out routine she pulled with Theon. Ha at Arya getting a burn in on that asshole trainee. Can't catch her lying that she doesn't want to murder you if you have no name! Ha! I guess she's figured out how to hide herself deep enough to pass all their crazy tests, because you know the minute they turn her loose she's going to be sitting on Cersei's chest, giggling while she stabs her to death.

It just annoyed me because we got more about Jekyll's struggles in England in 2s than we did for Sembene in two seasons. It just shows how disinterested the writers were in his character, as he surely went through some terrible shit being a dark skinned man with ritual scarring in Victorian England. But he's buried alone in the mountains somewhere, so it's cool! /sarcasm Jekyll's actor should have been Dorian, because he was alluring and also somewhat terrifying at the same time. Ugh, Frankenstein, always giving a new moral ditch to fall into when he's nearly made it out of the other one. I swear, if Lily had still put on a show of being a gullible 12 year old girl who just happened to want to Take Over the World he'd give her a smooch and wish her luck. New Cut Wife was too on the nose, but I'll wait. She looked nonplussed when Vanessa left, I wonder if the original Cut Wife set out some rules for her progeny to take Vanessa in if she ever appeared again? Gosh knows Vanessa's screwed otherwise. The two people who best know what danger she's in are too busy chasing their own demons to give a shit. Victor thinks she's a hysterical female, so even if he were clean he'd be at best a condescending prick about everything. A friendly condescending prick, but he's like Daredevil in that he refuses to acknowledge any supernatural other than his supernatural even when it hisses in his face. Ferdinand is legit the hero of this show. Ran double agent on a coven of witches that could liquefy his insides, and stomping right in on feral Vanessa Ives and doing what her family should have done. He should be Lupus Dei, he's got the whiskers for it!

I think it's almost a disservice for the top flying queens (e.g. Tyra, Bianca) to not be forced to the bottom so they can show their lip-syncing skills. Bob murdered that song. She showed she could dance and ham it up equally well. I guess it's good for the drama, but you'd think by now queens would know that being on the show is winning and they should be focused on presenting the best "face" for their fans. Not actually getting the paper-mache crown at the end. I don't think Derrick did himself a single favor this season. I think it almost would have been better for him to flip the bird to Michelle's advice and do top tier Britany all the time, and show his drag to a bigger audience. Instead he tripped himself up with stuff he's not good at and we only got to see him at peak drag during Snatch Game, where the look is the least important aspect. TL;DR he should have listened to Ru. Kim Chi blows my mind every construction challenge. I hope his mom comes to appreciate him, because his talent is off the charts.

The daughters are clearly rigorously trained assassins, I have no expectation of them to have fondness for a relative who is soft and weak, which is an anathema to them. I think the older sister decided the second Tristan picked the sister he thought was weaker. If he'd taken the harder opponent, I could see bull whip sister letting it play out. I think it depends on the country. Dany's argument was dumb because most people don't even remember when they were ruled by a Targaeryean, and on top of that the last one tried to kill them all. I can totally buy a fiercely independent nation would take pride in its ruling family. Letting your family get picked off one by one by the very family you've engaged your only heir to could go over very poorly. The fact there was only one guardsmen that Ellaria thought was a threat out of his whole palace speaks volumes. I'm not saying Doran was wrong, I'm just saying it seems like his mindset could have been orthogonal to his country's. Ellaria and Oberyn's entire line could be written off as crazy people bent on vengeance, or as a more accurate reflection of Dorne. I see that family as the Dornish Kill Bill trope, traveling around doing the shit that needs doing while Doran played high-minded king. I always thought Cersei was going to come for them the second she retrieved her daughter (dead or alive), so I see them as the steel that's needed to actually survive the hell she's about to bring down on them. Ethical steel usually gets killed in this show (Hey Jon), so I'm not mad at it.

Pretty sure the girl is another trainee, she was washing a body when Arya was first brought in by A Man. She always came off as resentful towards Arya, imo, so it doesn't surprise me that she goes hard any chance she gets. And, tbh, it's fair training for what Arya is hoping to pull off. Bitter trainee left her alive, with a weapon, and a warning of when she's coming back. Arya's kill list will do none of those things. Losing the hearts of your people is dangerous, as Tyrion and Vaerys are witnessing first hand in Mereen. Looks like the Dornish prince was on the exact same path. If Dorne falls under the "high-spirited and proud" stereotype it appears to, it doesn't matter 1 whit that Starting Shit with the Lannisters is the path to disaster. All the populace sees is that they're down 2 royal Martells at the Lannister's hands, and he's hiding up in his castle doing nothing. I loved Ellaria's daughters killing Tristian. That's exactly what's needed if they're about to go against Westeros. He was ready for an honorable duel to the death, and the elder sand was like "whoo, Betsy is lined up for a perfect kill shot, let's do this!" She looked so pleased with her handy-work too, it was great. Her sister's outrage was priceless. I was actually expecting the third sister to be there and pull her pretend-to-get-them-off-then-poison-them routine. HBO is really turning down the boob quota in this episode! Ugh, Dany. Just shut up and then light the tent on fire when he came to rape you. Perfect cover to run away! Instead she tried to pull rank and got punked by those two Khal wives. Or, if she hadn't locked two of her babies in a freaking basement, she could have just flambed the entire horde and looked cool while walking away from explosions. What, exactly, is Jorah planning to do once he finds Dany? He literally can't touch her to pull her to safety or anything. That stoneskin looks like it's spreading very rapidly, how soon afterwards to people go crazy? Daario's sniping was hilarious, it was like a little puppy trying to agitate an older dog. Jorah's not interested man, Jorah's dealt with more shit than you can ever imagine. All he wants is an airkiss from his Khaleesi before he drops dead. Why didn't they bring some of the Dothraki from her horde with them anyway? They have got to be bomb trackers, and probably would have known the politics of rescuing Dany from the widows house. Melisandre post-necklace looked 100% like CGI. She looks like she's a freaking thousand years old. What kind of crisis of confidence would you have if you've spent at least a few lifetimes trying to find your King, only to find out you called it 100% wrong? Not sure what Davos thinks she can do though. Shadow Baby was a short-duration, single-target spell. No evidence that Red Priests can ran down massive AOE damage, which is what's needed now. Love that everyone in that room knew Allister was full of shit and would murder them first chance he got. How long until someone else in the watch decides to apply his logic and wipe out that entire sniveling excuse for "leadership"? Has it been so long since last Winter that they literally do not understand the danger they're in? If you're alive, you're on the same side, dumbasses. Wildling vs other is the least of your concern. I hope that cannibal Wildling comes and eats Olly, that smug punk. Ugh. Man, Ramsay stays not getting Roose's warnings. You're supposed to torture nobodies, Ramsay. All Ramsay hears is "murder more, flay more, make more people fear me more so this doesn't happen again." Fat Walda is sitting up there thinking this is the best gig ever. Because Roose looooves her? No, because he can't afford to piss off Walder Frey right now. All Ramsay had to do was be not totally heinous and Sansa probably would have stayed put and ended up pregnant and stuck*. Idiot. Well Fat Walda may also think everything is awesome because she's a Frey. That place is Craster's Keep the sequel. Things are looking bad for Cersei right now. I don't see how she's making it out of this. But I do know that she is going to fuck up Septa Una before this game is over. Margaery might join in too. Get some sisterly bonding going. *Though I totally expect for her to end up pregnant and on the run because this show is horrible like that.

Ugh, poor Rachel. I could see her skin roasting all over, she is going to have the worst sunburn. I can't imagine even trying to race with the sunburn she probably had the next week, so maybe it was for the best? She's also lucky it was hella humid there, because she was moving so slowly I fully expected the back half of her plot to start drying out. She raced very tough, it was impressive, and sucks she was the weakest person doing that task. I legit think Brody has ADHD or something along those lines. It seemed like one of the kite-flyers kept telling him to look at the example, and Brody would keep grunt-screaming back as response. If any other roadblocks require him to follow instructions, they are going to get eliminated shortly. Team Roosterteeth are very even-keeled and are keeping up a good pace. I bet they will end up winning their first leg on the last leg, they seem like that kind of team that will not commit the pressure-induced brainfarts that usually abound on the last leg. Heh, warm meat mixed with a lot of tapioca? Yea, I would have gone straight to testicles, and I eat a lot of that type of food. I would just automatically revert to my southern setting and go "oh god waiiiii?" Those were so obviously paid actors, Sheri & Cole hardly had to head someone's direction before the person was gesturing them over and giving them perfect change. I feel like they should just give people who hit a NEL a time-out instead of these silly tasks. Maybe make them spend ten minutes in some historic site associated with the country.

I don't think he was high at all in that scene. Imo, that was the best gambit to keep himself alive and sit back in his chair. He strolled in, spelled out exactly why he was a terrible king, and dared anyone to step up and correct it. He specifically challenged each able son with a claim to take over. And no one took it, because they were too mind boggled to act. Anyone who was there and refused to take the sword basically has the taint of "coward" written all over them now. Can you imagine how Kattegat would react if any of them decided to change their mind later and try to challenge Ragnar? They'd be run out of town. I think he's supposed to look apart from the other sons. He has Herbard's (sp?) coloring, and those weird blue-white eyes. I think Ivar is supposed to be changed as a result of his close connection with Aslaug's side piece. And/or maybe it's Aslaug's blood finally showing, if her father did actually slay a dragon, she's got some crazy supernatural business going on. Glad to see Rollo the Beserker is still in there. The first Paris sacking, a Viking who was afraid to climb the ropes and face the Frankish got head-butted to death via Rollo. Now he's on the other side, and his first reaction to cowardice is to gut the dude and kick him off the boat. I can see Bjorn being detached from having children because his whole life was basically ruined because of Ragnar's obsession with having many sons.

Right? I couldn't figure out if she was tailing Chi Chi around the stage to try to force her to collaborate, or deliberately getting in front of her while she was serving. The entire lipsync I was growling "Get. Out. Of. The. Way!" at the screen.

Bob destroyed that challenge. Nothing will be as good as Bianca literally juggling babies, but that was close. Every time Bob did the evil finger motion, I thought of Sims right before they pull a prank, made me laugh every time. I have to admit, I would like to see what Fish Bob looks like. Her padding is always 100% flawless even when she's doing these cooky makeup looks, so she should be able to do it. I keep getting this sneaking suspicion that Derrick is actually sarcastic, but the other queens sail right past it. It almost looked like he was chuckling to himself after asking the N/S Korea question, but then Kim Chi answered it literally. She did a great job hamming it up for her smear campaign. The word "ratchet" flows far too freely from his mouth though. <3 Bob for pointing out the symbolism of putting a black man in a hoodie + skittles/iced tea reference, but of course this show loves stereotypes for easy laughs so what are you going to do? Kim Chi was the best part of Naomi's ad. Kim Chi could have communicated the same line of thought for her ad (skinny bitches, can't trust 'em) through imagery, which she excels at. That clip of her spewing water at the camera is easily one of my top ten favorite RPDR moments. Hilar! Her runway was sick! And her walk's gotten way better. She's going to get cut soon, though. Naomi has locked in the beauty queen slot. They were setting up Thorgy for her lack of editing all season, and it finally jumped up and bit her. Chi Chi is the lipsync assassin this season I see. If there was ever a song to not cart wheel to, that was it. I kind of wished they had Latrice just show up randomly in the middle of it to demolish both of them though.

Ha, this is why I refuse to be navigator! I learned to drive in a friend's car, and we were the exact opposite. She'd want to know every step of the instructions, because she can apparently recreate a 3D topographical map with her brain and carry on. Whereas I'm like WHY ARE YOU TELLING ME WHAT TO DO 3 TURNS FROM NOW? Giving me extra directions I can't process drives up my blood pressure instantaneously. Car directions are super stressful. I also despise having to repeat myself, so I would be just as terrible as Dana in that situation, because that boy apparently has hollow tubes running through his brain when it comes to directions. Switching drivers probably wouldn't work either, 'cause he seems like that guy who spends a lot of time fussing with the paper trying to figure stuff out while you're asking "Am I turning here? Am I? What does it say?" Her screaming and calling him psychotic while he peers bewilderingly in the rear-view mirror was literally one of my favorite TAR moments. Magician's girlfriend has seemed pretty game for anything thus far, so I don't know why he didn't just listen when she said she wasn't comfortable riding the bike. I love how Burnie took one look at Ashley all hunched over after trial one and said "I'm calling it, we're switching." Why was Brodie screeching at Kurt to push it when he was the one drafting off Kurt? He is loud and annoying and ruins everything.

All this time and Rollo still can't assess when he's actually being insulted without a smarter woman to analyze it for him. You betrayed your brother, and killed some of your best friends for less, clown. Siggy's rolling over in her grave... And rolling again because Aslaug hasn't learned her lesson from last time. I wonder if she purposefully let Siggy out, hoping she would pay the Herbard's (sp?) price and not one of her precious children, especially Ivar. I never really got a sense for what Aslaug even wanted out of life, so I don't even feel that bad for her. Poor Lagertha. At least she has true family to support her, could you imagine if she were stuck at home with Kalf trying to console her? She def would have murdered him then if she'd passed at their marriage. Bjorn's actor has done a creepy-good job at imitating Travis Flimmel's Ragnar, his character is so much his father's son. I'm ready for him to take over, especially now that Torvi is officially Ride or Die for him. Is it bad I thought it was kind of hot when Bjorn glances where Erlander is, and Torvi lines herself up with the shot before turning around? Teamwork!!! The disappointment radiating off of Bjorn's face when he was evaluating his strung-out father was palpable. Looks like Ragnar's just trying to execute his bucket list before charging into Valhalla. This show does an excellent job of creating compelling characters, while also reminding you there's a reason people went scorched earth trying to root out the vikings.

Derrick got some surprisingly good reads in during the mini-challenge, and kept her damn wig on for the lip-sync, so she deserved to stay, imo. I wish Michelle had this much to say for un-cinched box-in-a-bikini Courtney Act. Naomi killed that challenge, such a well-deserved win! They both looked freaking flawless. Kim Chi rocked it too. His "dance" looked like a suuuuuuuuper slo-mo fight scene to me, I liked it. I'm not mad at Bob for making sure his girl looked gorgeous. I hate these kinds of challenges, on any show, because a lot of the time the superfan gets screwed so the contestant can focus on themselves. I would always rather it be the other way around. It was Robbie's time to go. He reminds me of Trixie, who didn't really impress me on the show either, but I like him quite a lot in his YT stuff with Katya. Robbie's more of a "talking head" queen, give him an organized segment and he'll probably crush it. Chi Chi deserved to be in bottom for giving up on her outfits so early. Maybe she was wore out from constructing a Madonna look from scratch last week, but she doesn't have the wardrobe to be slacking off.

Man, I was cheering so hard for Team Rooster Teeth, they're so jovial and good-natured no matter where they are in the standings. Hope they pull out a 1st place finish before everything's over! You absolutely have to return other team's items. The Globetrotters got nailed on the same thing a few seasons back, and had to do way more work to return the fannypack/bumbag they'd accidentally taken. Cole is at an age of like, maximum male insecurity, so I'm not even that bothered by his awkward reactions to literally everything. Sheri shushing him for saying "muy rapido" was freaking hilarious. You could just hear the "Oh, Lord, now everyone's going to think I can't raise my kids right" running through her head. Rotating on a tweaked knee is literally one of the worst things that has ever happened to me, so I do not blame Blair one bit for deferring on the dance task.The way something reacts to simple impact versus torsion can be totally different, so yes she could run while still taking one look at all that leaping and twisting and go "oh hells no." I'm not on the #SaveScott train either. He seems like one of those quietly Very Particular parents where they decide something needs to be done a certain way and there's literally no point arguing with them. The one time Blair was carrying her own bag, Scott immediately started to nag nag nag about how he should carry it and would probably fixate on it until the end of time. Becoming an adult Barbie Princess takes hard work from parent and child.

Oh sure, check Bob for being excellent so Thorgy can win one. Girl, bye! That is literally the most ridiculous comment I've heard from Michelle in all the seasons I've watched her. "Please stop killing it so hard, and stop knowing you're killing it, it can get obnoxious." Chi Chi as Eartha Kitt was such a pleasant surprise! The voice was so good, and her little Catwoman puns were awesome. And she had some self-awareness about her shortcomings and was honest about it. That girl will go far, for sure. The problem with Britney is that she doesn't have any iconic quirks that aren't outright insulting. Though there were those hilarious series of Britney gifs where she made all these extraordinarily pained expressions when critiquing singers on some reality show. Maybe Derrick could have done something like that. She was competent and engaged, I wasn't mad at it. Kim Chi figuring how to turn that lumbering walk in her favor, yay! I'm a little surprised she didn't pivot when she saw two other queens doing that look, she surely has the repertoire to pull of something else if she wanted to. They showed Kimmy Jong Un like...twice, so I couldn't really get any sense of her character. Her answers were funny in those two, at least. If anything deserved a double elimination, it was those lackluster New York and Nancy Grace impressions. You don't even have to try to make those two funny, you can just literally repeat what they've said in real life and it's funny! Naomi should not have backed off Whoopi. Even if it were a Whoopi showdown, Ru would probably respect Naomi for being willing to go head to head against Bob. And that "I shole is ugly" was funnier than anything Naomi said as New York. Robby is too in her own head. Maybe they're setting her up for a redemption arc, otherwise I anticipate she's getting cut next episode or two.