Mastering Ink... but not English: The Language Topic

[Kromm]

I'm constantly noticing how uneducated the judges sound (and some of the contestants). Here's a place to post their biggest abuses of the English language. 

 

For example, in the most recent episode as I type this ("Players Choice"--Episode 13 of Season 6--where the artists tattoo NFL players), we get the criticism that a tattoo is "unlegible", made by human toothpick holder Oliver Peck.

 

Some real BS also comes out of Nunez' mouth, but Peck definitely had the lions share in that episode. Later in the same episode rather than say he couldn't make up his mind, he declared "I'm in a hung jury". Mind you, he was just speaking about his own lack of a decision, not about the other judges splitting their votes. He really thinks that if a single person can't make up their mind how to vote, that's what a "hung jury" is.

Edited September 24, 2015 by Kromm

[Kromm]

Watching "Inmkmaster Redemption" reminded me of one of the "classics" for Toothpick Man.  Remember when he was telling off Season 5's Julia for making her canvas walk off?  Peck's statement to her was: "You unprovocably told him to go fuck himself!"

 

Seeing that again (thanks to Inkmaster Redemption's flashback) gave me a real giggle at what this hobo considers the English language.

[thewhiteowl]

I find Oliver's abuse of the English language kind of endearingly funny.

I did see the preview where Chris says he is "literally" thrown to the wolves. I could only hope.

[BigBlueMastiff]

 

You unprovocably told him to go fuck himself!"

Ha ha, I heard "unrevocably," also nonsensical.

[akr]

Also in the preview: "it's painstakingly obvious that portraits are not your thing."  (Oliver) 

[Kromm]

Another Toothpickism in the "Active Duty" episode.  He says "If it at least just had one perimeter outline around this guy's facial shape".  Now "facial" is an actual word, but it's not even close to correct in that context.

And at the end of the episode, to Duffy "You definitely are on par to pass your Master by leaps and bounds over the next ten, twenty, whatever years of tattooin'!"

 

A sentence that's awkward at best, but I also think it misuses the word "par" (because he's talking about her EXCEEDING Kruseman, not equaling him).

[AlliePK]

Ollie's abuse of the English language has always been a great source of humor to me.

[LoneHaranguer]

 

A sentence that's awkward at best, but I also think it misuses the word "par" (because he's talking about her EXCEEDING Kruseman, not equaling him).

No, his use of "par" is correct. He's saying that she's consistent with the norm in being on her way to accomplishing that result. It's a bit like saying that a person on a cross-country trip is on par to passing a particular city by Tuesday or Wednesday.

[Kromm]

No, his use of "par" is correct. He's saying that she's consistent with the norm in being on her way to accomplishing that result. It's a bit like saying that a person on a cross-country trip is on par to passing a particular city by Tuesday or Wednesday.

I dunno. Every definition I've ever seen is not that it means "normal", but rather that it means "equal".  The two concepts are different, in my opinion. Not that "equal" quite works in that sentence either.

 

Most people would construct that thought as "You definitely are on schedule to pass your Master by leaps and bounds over the next ten, twenty, whatever years of tattooin'!"

[LoneHaranguer]

 

I dunno. Every definition I've ever seen is not that it means "normal", but rather that it means "equal".  The two concepts are different, in my opinion. Not that "equal" quite works in that sentence either.

I probably would have said "on track". I think another way to say it that stays close to his phrasing would be that she's on par with someone destined to greatly exceed her master.

[Kromm]

Kyle Dunbar, on Inkmaster Redemption (Season 1, Episode 5): "I got tired of Nunez... and in the mean time my wife was at home going through economical problems."

[Kate the Great]

Oliver Peck (who else?) dinged someone's tattoos tonight as being "unprecise."  Dictionary.com (because I'm lazy) states that's an acceptable form, but I'm pretty darn sure Oliver meant "imprecise."

Edited April 13, 2016 by Kate the Great

[azshadowwalker]

"Unprecise" bugs the hell out of me, and I noticed it, too. It's probably a word that has become "acceptable" because enough people screw up the word.

[Kromm]

Toothpeck (my new nickname for him, because I realized it's funnier than just "Toothpick" or "Toothpick Man") is worse than ever this season. Too much bad English to even cite it all.  It's practically every sentence.

Edited September 10, 2016 by Kromm

[akr]

52 minutes ago, Kromm said:

Toothpeck (my new nickname for him, because I realized it's funnier than just "Toothpick" or "Toothpick Man") is worse than ever this season. Too much bad English to even cite it all.  It's practically every sentence.

Love the nickname!  I pretty much tune out what he says.  

[AlliePK]

I rarely tune out Oliver.  In spite of the butchering of the English language, the man knows his shit.  Having had the opportunity to get critique and advice from him great improved my tattooing back when I was in the game.