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Teen Wolf Quotes


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How do we not have one of these already? I couldn't think of a snarky subtitle, so feel free to make suggestions.

 

Quote of the night that made me want to start the thread:

 

Malia: Fun like bowling? Or like sex with other guys?

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(edited)

There isn't a thread?

 

Sheriff Stilinski: I want you to be honest with me. Totally and completely honest. Have you been time traveling?
Stiles: Hang on, what?
Sheriff Stilinski: Because if time traveling is real, I'm done, I'm out. You're going to be driving me to Eichen House.
Scott McCall: We found him like that.
Sheriff Stilinski: Where? Swimming in the fountain of youth?
Stiles: No. We found him buried in a tomb of wolfsbane in an Azetec temple in Mexico underneath a church in the middle of a town that was destroyed by an earthquake

Edited by blueray
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(edited)

Peter: His username is Allison? ...His password is also Allison?
Stiles: Still want him in your pack?

 

Derek. I'm gonna rip your throat out. With my teeth.

 

Jackson: Where are you getting your juice?
Scott: My mom does the grocery shopping.

 

Melissa: Hey, you two supernatural teenage boys! Don't test my entirely un-supernatural level of patience!

 

Stiles: Why is it starting to feel like your Batman and I'm Robin? I don't want to be Robin all the time.
Scott: Nobody's Batman and Robin any of the time!
Stiles: Not even some of the time?

 

Stiles: God, do either of you even play baseball?!

 

Sheriff Stilinski: I have a gun. If I want the curly fries, I will have the curly fries.

 

Sheriff Stilinski: So you lied to me.
Stiles: That depends on how you define lying.
Sheriff Stilinksi: Well I define it as not telling the truth. How do you define it?
Stiles: Reclining your body in a horizontal position.

 

Stiles: What did you find? How did you find it? Where did you find it? And yes, I've had a lot of Adderall.

 

Stiles: I'll kill you. You understand me? I'm gonna kill you. And I'm too upset to come up with a witty description about how exactly I'm gonna kill you, but I'm just gonna do it, okay? I'm gonna, grr, goodbye.

 

Melissa: Be your own anchor.

 

Allison: They're not gonna split us apart.

Scott: Not us.

Edited by bettername2come
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I'm not sure exactly how it went but this is what I remember, if anyone knows please correct:

 

Stiles: ...he's a werewolf

 

Sheriff:  So is your best friend and your dating a werecoyotte. Until the flying monkey's come I wouldn't question anything.

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"Your best friend is a werewolf. You're dating a werecoyote. I still don't know what Kira's supposed to be. When the flying monkeys come soaring through this station you will have my undivided attention. Until then just go to school."

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(edited)

Sheriff Stilinski: See if you can stall the ME for five minutes. I've got an expert of my own coming to take a look.
Deputy Parrish: You have an expert on teenage cannibals?

 

Sheriff Stilinski: We're going to be okay. And at least for the moment, I can afford to take my son and his girlfriend out to dinner. Malia, what's your favorite food?
Malia Tate: Deer.
Stiles Stilinski: Pizza. She likes pizza.

Edited by Sakura12
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5x15 Amplification

Malia: So you've never worked for anything and you're basically a cheater?

 

Theo: I still need to graduate.

Stiles: What you need is to be beaten. With a lead pipe. Wrapped in barbed wire.

Theo: I admit some mistakes were made.

Stiles: Some murders. Some murders were made.

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Because I love how it sums up what an overachiever Lydia is:

Teacher: I already told you, Lydia, I don't give extra credit for alternate equations based on your own theoretical findings.

 

Parrish: I'm a harbinger of death, not a harbinger of kidnapping.

 

Scott: I know this sounds crazy. But I think I had a best friend.

 

Lydia: What the hell is a Stiles?

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Stiles: Somebody's gonna remember me. Either Lydia, or Scott, Malia, someone. They're gonna find me, all right? They'll come for me. Who would ever come for you?

 

Malia: Your truck's broke.

 

Peter: Stiles, let's not have a moment. 

Stiles: If you survive, you have to find my friends for me, okay? You have to tell them about me. 'Cause they're not gonna remember me, so you have to tell them that I'm here.

Peter: When I survive, I'm going to get as far away from Beacon Hills as I possibly can. And if I happen along one of your below average friends and it doesn't inconvenience me, I might mention your name.
 

Peter: Use your head.

 

Scott: He bit me. How could I forget him?

 

Peter: This looks like the underground lair of a depressed bureaucrat.
 

Edited by bettername2come
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(edited)

Scott: I can't lose Stiles.

 

Malia: I have a plan. I don't know if it's devious.

 

Peter: You know we never did get that second date.

Melissa: *drops him to the floor*

 

Sheriff: Why is it so important to you that I remember him?

Lydia: Because you loved him.

 

Malia: I marked the territory...Visually! I marked it visually!

 

Peter: You have no self-preservation instincts. How are you my daughter?

Edited by bettername2come
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Noah: I have a son. His name is Mieczysław Stilinski. But we call him Stiles. I remember. When Stiles was a little kid, he couldn't say his first name. Not sure why. It pretty much rolls off the tongue. But, uh, the closest he could get was "mischief." His mother called him that until... I remember when, uh... When Stiles first got his Jeep. It belonged to his mother. She wanted him to have it. The first time when he took a spin behind the wheel, he went straight into a ditch. I gave him his first roll of duct tape that day. He was always getting into trouble. But he always had a good heart. Always. We're here tonight because my goofball son decided to drag Scott, his greatest friend in the world, into the woods to see a dead body.

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Noah:You need to get out of here. Don't worry about me.

Stiles: What, you're kidding, right?

 

Douglas: You'll make a fine Ghost Rider, Scott. And I'll have a true Alpha by my side. And then a Banshee, a were-coyote...

Stiles: A Stiles.

Douglas: What?

Stiles: *whacks him with a bat* Bad guy, right? I didn't misread that?
 

Stiles: Can't believe I'm gone a couple days, the whole place falls apart.

Scott: No, you were gone for three months.

Stiles: I was... What? Okay, if they don't let me graduate, I swear to God...

 

Stiles: Okay, how the hell do you "merge worlds?" Okay, nowhere in the manual does it say that werewolves can do that. And Scott and I pretty much wrote the manual.
 

Stiles: Okay, it seems like you got an idea, let's discuss - where are you going!?

Liam: I'll be back!

Stiles: Were we like that?

Scott: Worse.

 

Scott: You wanna split up?

Stiles: Never again.

Scott: Thank God.

 

Lydia: The only way we were able to break through the Hunt is with an emotional connection.

Malia: Dang. Wish I could help.
 

 

Peter: I'm not! In the pack, but no one likes a Nazi.

 

Stiles: They still need us.

Scott: They'll always need us.

Stiles: And, you know, I... I need you. You know that.

Scott: I need you too.
 

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