S09.E05: Property Queens

[davidcalgary29]

The queens return to the Werkroom eager to discuss the episode's outcome and stoke up the drama! Angeria steams over her second blocking and Roxxxy provides the funniest bit of the evening when she declares that "it's not personal, it's just an eye for an eye". Tragically, none of the other queens reward this quip for the masterwork of sophistry that it is, and move on to a session of Drag Math that leaves Shannel -- in the episode's second funniest bit -- flummoxed and discombobulated. Roxxxy -- because she's that bitch -- calmly owns her machinations, and we move on because, really -- what else is there to say after that?

After a truly inane mini challenge, which still manages to be more coherent than anything the Teletubbies ever babbled, we move onto the main challenge: the queens are tasked with creating real estate commercials! The options are: "Frozen Bits, Alaska", "Salem", "Tumbleweed, Texas", "Gatorland, Florida", and "Wyoming EnviroNightmare Fracking Paradise". Okay, I made up the last one, but you know everyone was thinking it too.

Ru asks twice-blocked Angeria to pick teams in the hope of stirring up more drama! Angeria declines the invitation (smartly), and we move on.

The results are okay, with a spirited Plastique and natural Angeria providing the most effective bits. The runway is largely a flop, although Plastique is, as usual, stunning. SPOILER: Nina's runway is awful. Wait -- that's not a spoiler, is it? Ru angers the rest of the cast by awarding Plastique and Roxxxy the win! 

Roxxxy wins a messy lipsynch because Plastique can't remember that this is a lipsynch, and that you should probably move your mouth.

Drama ensues when Roxxxy is tasked with cutting another queen. She masterfully milks the moment for all it's worth -- hilariously faking-out Angeria -- before moving on to Mik, brilliantly preventing onstage theatrics by having an Emotional Moment over The Stress Of it All -- manufactured or not -- and making Mik play the role of comforter in the scene. Roxxxy, you really are That Bitch. 

Next week: it's a roast! Everyone promises to move on from the Roxxxy/Angeria drama. But not really!

Edited June 8 by davidcalgary29

[CraftyHazel]

I know it’s been a decade, and Jinkx calls Roxxxy a friend, but I still can’t find a way to like her.  And she can miss me with not knowing she had stopped at Angeria.  She knew where everyone was standing in relation to the back of the stage, and if she thought she could get away with it without a lot of backlash, she’d have happily awarded the scissors to Angeria once again.  Once she saw the reactions she got from everyone when she stopped at Angeria, she switched her target to Mik and poured on the tears.  She hasn’t got a genuine bone in her body.

That said, she is a talented queen.  I loved her runway look and wish I could have that coat!!

Nina is definitely not a looks queen.  But somehow, I love her.  She is funny and seems quite genuinely sweet.

[davidcalgary29]

1 hour ago, CraftyHazel said:

I know it’s been a decade, and Jinkx calls Roxxxy a friend, but I still can’t find a way to like her.

I get what you're writing -- I really do -- but Roxxxy is a Bowdy-Bowdy Bitch, and is brave enough to stand up and be one in this day of rabid social media maniacs, so I do give her credit here for not being Weak Sauce. See? Roxxxy did learn something from AS2 aside from the theme song to The Golden Girls! Bless you for enriching my vocabulary, Alyssa. 

Edited June 8 by davidcalgary29

[CraftyHazel]

44 minutes ago, davidcalgary29 said:

I get what you're writing -- I really do -- but I also recognize that Roxxxy is a Bowdy-Bowdy Bitch, and is brave enough to stand up and be one in this day of rabid social media maniacs, so I do praise her for not being Weak Sauce. See? Roxxxy did learn something from AS2 aside from the theme song to The Golden Girls! Bless you for enriching my vocabulary, Alyssa. 

But see, I would like her better if she would completely own up to it!  She comes close, but then backpedals furiously (perhaps remembering the backlash she got from Season Five) and we get Roxxxy weeping on stage and refusing to block Angeria again and sticking it to Mik instead.  I have no issue with her blocking Mik (she has three wins and is a talented queen), but I just want her to own her reputation and quit the crocodile tears.  Yes, she would get some nasty comments on social media, but I think she would get them no matter who she chose.  Either say, “Oh, well…I landed on Angeria, so it’s only fair” (and I still believe she knew who was behind her when she stopped), or just go after the queens with the most badges and call it strategic.  Roxxxy is that bitch and I wish she would either own it 100% or back away from that title.

I guess she just reminds me too much of my father, honestly.  He’d pick pick pick about a thing until someone got upset, then laugh and proclaim that it wasn’t any big deal, really, and it was silly for everyone to be upset.  Then his feelings were hurt because everybody else took things so seriously when it was nothing serious at all.  He wanted it both ways, and so, IMO, does Roxxxy.

But hey…I respect your opinion and appreciate the discussion!

[CB-LXX]

7 hours ago, davidcalgary29 said:

Drama ensues when Roxxxy is tasked with cutting another queen. She masterfully milks the moment for all it's worth -- hilariously faking-out Angeria -- before moving on to Mik, brilliantly preventing onstage theatrics by having an Emotional Moment over The Stress Of it All -- manufactured or not -- and making Mik play the role of comforter in the scene. Roxxxy, you really are That Bitch. 

Next week: it's a roast! Everyone promises to move on from the Roxxxy/Angeria drama. But not really!

I would like to think that Roxxxy has matured since season 5, but who knows. I don't know what she was crying for, she wasn't cutting someone and sending them home, they just don't get a badge (although yes, it would have been sucky if Angeria got it for the 3rd time). Pass it out and move on. If that's a problem, then just slack through the rest of the challenges.

I'll be honest though, I felt like Jorgeous' tears were more manipulative. Her "commercial" with Mik just wasn't all that great and they got called out on it, so to speak. Gotta shed those tears and garner up the sympathy.

[CB-LXX]

Out of all the "commercials," my favorite was Nina & Shannel, followed by Angeria and Vanjie. But I thought Ru's criticism of Nina & Shannel's was a bit hateful and hypocritical. They make a few macabre jokes that fit in with the theme, but Gottmikk can basically repeat the same schtick for every show and it's okay? Don't get me wrong, I don't dislike Gottmikk, but c'mon, at least be consistent.

Getting back to N & S, I had hoped they would win this one, but the runway did them no favors, particularly Nina (especially the shoes, the shoes were a hot mess).

[CraftyHazel]

24 minutes ago, CB-LXX said:

I'll be honest though, I felt like Jorgeous' tears were more manipulative. Her "commercial" with Mik just wasn't all that great and they got called out on it, so to speak. Gotta shed those tears and garner up the sympathy.

This too!  These queens are all savvy enough by now to know that Ru wants that “vulnerability”.  So sooner or later, almost everyone has to cry, or express some sort of turmoil.  What better time than when you get a less than glowing critique?

I feel like the show is losing a bit of its charm for me. The last time I really cared who won (in a regular season) was when Crystal Methyd competed in season 12.  And of course, I wanted Jinkx to be the Queen of Queens.  But I don’t consider it must-see-TV anymore.

i’m a stubborn old girl, though…I’ll probably watch it as long as it’s on!

[MsJamieDornan]

6 hours ago, CraftyHazel said:

 And she can miss me with not knowing she had stopped at Angeria.  She knew where everyone was standing in relation to the back of the stage, and if she thought she could get away with it without a lot of backlash, she’d have happily awarded the scissors to Angeria once again.  Once she saw the reactions she got from everyone when she stopped at Angeria, she switched her target to Mik and poured on the tears.  She hasn’t got a genuine bone in her body.

Not a genuine bone in her body. She thinks she knows what makes good TV, and she wants to be the center of attention. ALL THE TIME

[Madding crowd]

I found it odd that Ru said Nina and Shannel kept up the same few notes; they didn’t do it anymore than the rest of the groups. Jorgeous and Mik clearly did the worst and Ru didn’t seem to care about that. I like Nina but her costumes aren’t doing her any favorites and why was she going to lip sync in a gigantic elf costume?

I thought Mik’s suit was way too big in front but Ru will never give him a critique. Roxxy still bugs me ( since Jinkx and I know she apologized and changed) and I think she would have snipped Angie again if she could get away with it. 

[davidcalgary29]

6 hours ago, CB-LXX said:

I would like to think that Roxxxy has matured since season 5, but who knows. I don't know what she was crying for, she wasn't cutting someone and sending them home, they just don't get a badge (although yes, it would have been sucky if Angeria got it for the 3rd time). Pass it out and move on. If that's a problem, then just slack through the rest of the challenges.

I'll be honest though, I felt like Jorgeous' tears were more manipulative. Her "commercial" with Mik just wasn't all that great and they got called out on it, so to speak. Gotta shed those tears and garner up the sympathy.

Participating on Drag Race must be a singularly frustrating experience: you give up months of your life to participate in silly challenges where people do dumb things, and sometimes end up getting your feelings hurt by some of those dumb things, and then have a long time to process it and forget it in silence...only to have everything dredged up a year later when the show airs. You're then forced to relitigate the experience by viewers who want you to empathize with their fresh outrage. And all this for little or no money. 

I've come to the point where I'm just going to give everyone a pass on All Stars unless they do something terrible. I mean, they're just playing the game the show wants them too, right? And some of these queens have known each other for DECADES -- I'd hope that their relationships are stronger than a shaky narrative arc. 

I'm just continually surprised that RuPaul (and the entire Production team) isn't as scrutinized as heavily as Tyra is for ANTM (or for that matter, any reality show) for the treatment of her contestants. Now that's a subject that bears lots of further investigation.

Edited June 8 by davidcalgary29

[SemiCharmedLife]

I also enjoyed Nina and Shannel's real estate ad.  It was clever and it hit the brief of being about real estate- there were a lot of descriptions of the property's attributes which became witty jokes.  But, I knew Ru would pick one of the hillbilly duos.  Ru likes the more ridiculous and over the top humor, and I think the queens know that by now, too.  I'm disappointed Shannel hasn't received a badge yet.  Hopefully, she will win some money for her charity and get exposure while she's here.

I'm worried that the winner will be either Roxxxy or Gottmik.  Both are talented queens, but I'm not fond of their "personalities."  

[Kaboom 2.0]

Shannel & I are true sisters: I react the same way when I hear someone directing complex mathematical blah blah in my direction. I truly want her to earn at least 2 badges, there's still time.

Plastique should've won both badges with that performance but I actually preferred Angeria/Vangie and Shannel/Nina's ads. Plastique is queen of this season's runway, for sure. 

Some of the judges' choices this season have been headache inducing but I'll keep watching just to see some of my fave queens weeky. 

Also, Roxxxy backing down & snipping Mik was hilarious. I have a feeling Angeria would've taken those shears to Roxxxy's wigs if she had gotten snipped again!  

[Mahfouz]

Pretty rich of Rupaul to complain about all the macabre jokes in a skit set in SALEM MASSACHUSETTS. What did she expect the skit to contain? Jokes about being a fan of the Red Sox?

I am absolutely convinced that Roxxy cried after choosing Mik because she is hoping this decreases the chance that Mik will scissor her next week. I think Roxxy and PT benefitted from a. PT going ugly and b. being the first of the hillbilly skits. I know Roxxy lives in Florida but if she thinks that the northern part of that state isn't country she needs to get out more. 

 

[joanne3482]

3 hours ago, Mahfouz said:

but if she thinks that the northern part of that state isn't country she needs to get out more. 

I do believe the words I've heard to describe the northern part of the state is Flobama. My sister lives there. 

I think whomever had Tumbleweed should have done ghosts for a ghost town. That was too many hillbillies.