S08.E17: David & Benji & Erica

[CrazyInAlabama]

My guess is Erica at the end of this episode, was using cabs, and sent her car to California by a car carrier service, for the same reason they couldn't use the MRI or CAT scan (not sure which) on her, because she gained so much weight back that she didn't fit behind the steering wheel.   So Erica managed to eat her way through three stomach surgeries.    The original stomach stapling when she was a teen, the gastric sleeve Dr. Now did, and then the gastric bypass.        Erica is one of the most selfish, and despicable people on this show.     Her demand that her brother park the boat that supports his family, and move to Houston to help her was ridiculous.    I never saw her sister as mean, she just told Erica the truth, and the entire family has been through Erica's failures at weight loss for many years.      I wasn't surprised the family said no to Erica, I was just shocked that they still did anything for her.      I bet the relatives were hoping she'd stay in Houston forever.   

I think Jimmy was getting clutchy vibes out of Erica from the beginning of their dating on the show.     Her FB profile picture is still the two of them, and he's been out of her life for a year or probably two by now?    I bet that since she is such a pro at eating through WLS, surgery and regained after all three surgeries, and couldn't fit in the MRI, that she's now heavier than ever.  

The way David traded his wife in for another model, because he could now do better, was horrible.    He should invest in a big mirror, and take a good look.

Benji deserves to have his dreams come true, because he worked hard, and didn't put up with his brother's horrible treatment of his wife, and others, and was willing to do whatever he had to do to regain his health.      I hope Benji keeps the weight off, and keeps going forward.      I hope David and his new girlfriend never cross my TV screen again.  

Edited July 26, 2020 by CrazyInAlabama

[Ralphster]

44 minutes ago, CrazyInAlabama said:

I never saw her sister as mean, she just told Erica the truth, and the entire family has been through Erica's failures at weight loss for many years.

I agree. I never saw her as mean, either. There was a lot of virtue-signaling about Erica's sister being the meanest meanie who ever meaned, but the truth is that Erica is a very negative person with no concept of boundaries whatsoever, and with a huge entitlement complex. Her sister was a saint to accompany her to Houston at all, given Erica's arrogant expectations that people will just drop their lives to be at her beck and call. One can't help but wonder if Jimmy cottoned on to this aspect of Erica and took off.

[Ralphster]

I also wonder why Diana, the therapist in California, no longer treated Erica that we saw, and Erica had to go to Lola for therapy. Lola is a terrible "therapist." Dr. Now should get a clue and stop sending vulnerable, seriously messed up people to that idiot. She knows just enough to be dangerous. Her constant theme of confronting your abuser before you have a stronger sense of self or tools to cope with emotional setbacks does nothing but send people into a tailspin.

[CrazyInAlabama]

I don't think that doctors or therapists can treat across state lines.    So the California therapist was probably only licensed to practice there, and not when Erica was in Texas.   Or maybe the therapists want to meet face-to-face, or now, over telelinks.  

Edited July 27, 2020 by CrazyInAlabama

[Ralphster]

4 minutes ago, CrazyInAlabama said:

I don't think that doctors or therapists can treat across state lines.    So the California therapist was probably only licensed to practice there, and not when Erica was in Texas. 

I have had several doctors treat me from different states. They order tests and a local doc carries them out and sends the results onward. I have also had a therapist treat me from across the country. I am not entirely sure if she was allowed to treat me, though. 😉 But she did anyway. I am really curious as to what happened with Diana; maybe it's nothing, maybe it's something. I do know that Erica is one of those patients who just never gets better, because she really doesn't have any desire to change for her own sake; it always has to be for someone else.

Edited July 26, 2020 by Ralphster

[CrazyInAlabama]

I can see Benji doing well, and ending up part of the successful 5%.  However, Erica has already eaten through her third surgery, and gained even more, so she's definitely a failure (she still has Jimmy on her profile picture, she just never gives up, sadly).    David will never be successful, even if he keeps weight off, which I don't think he will, because he's just not a nice person inside.  

[Ralphster]

9 hours ago, CrazyInAlabama said:

I can see Benji doing well, and ending up part of the successful 5%.

I have been wondering if there really is a 5% success rate, to be honest. Melissa Morris was probably the most famous success story, and Dr. Now waved her hither and yon as an example of how awesome his "program" is. Except I believe she's now around 300 pounds, maybe more. I'd be happy to be proved wrong on this; I'm basing this on a "Where are they now?" for her that aired recently. People who are mentally ill enough to eat their way into 600+ pounds need serious, intensive therapy, something that Lola cannot provide. Dr. Paradise seems slightly better, but neither of them seem to really zero in on people's issues in the mini-sessions we are shown. I also think that Dr. Now replaces one unhealthy eating disorder with another; he needs to steer clear of the food pyramid and embrace keto, for his patients are all severely diabetic when they come to see him. They need to learn how to eat fat, and eat intuitively, and to manage their anxiety. Every last patient has what seems to be unbearable anxiety; I've been there, and it's hell. I just don't really see how Dr. Now's shitty "program" helps people long-term, and his patients' long-term stories seem to bear this skepticism out.

Edited July 27, 2020 by Ralphster

[CrazyInAlabama]

I believe that success is losing the weight, and regaining some, but not to the weight they were before surgery.    Some like Erica, have had three surgeries, and eaten through all three, and is bigger than ever.  

The problem with therapy, is that unless the patient realizes something is wrong with how they cope, and how they think, and embrace the process to change, then therapy is useless.    Many of the TV patients are totally delusional, and even after Dr. Now and his staff tell them WLS is just a tool, and they have to do the work, they still think surgery is the magic bullet.       

A friend's husband had the most radical gastric bypass surgery (I'm not sure they do that type any longer), and had a lot of complications.    He lost fairly slowly, and didn't end up with the 'apron' requiring skin surgeries, and didn't have Lymphedema (as far as I know), and lost down to his goal weight.    Then he started sneaking food at night, and doggy bags didn't last until the next morning.   He regained about 50 lbs., and managed to stop there.   However, the radical gastric bypass patients have to take the supplements, and vitamins recommended, and follow the eating plan (protein first, small meals, no carbonated or sugary drinks, etc.), and they still can have nutritional issues.     Surgery is not the miracle that people think it is, but a tool to help them lose, and get healthier, but many will never realize that.  

Edited July 28, 2020 by CrazyInAlabama

[Ralphster]

When success is defined in those terms, that makes sense. 5% seems about right in that case. Isn't it just flabbergasting that someone could eat through three WLS's? I just... I don't understand it at all. I like to snark on the pounders, but the truth is that I don't understand their thinking with regard to eating at all. I was at 300 and knew I was headed down a dark road if I didn't change something. I love chocolate fudge cake, too, but I'm close to my target weight and have learned to enjoy foods that don't spike my insulin. (I was a diabetic before starting keto.) I think an exploration of the mental madness that is clearly going on with these people would be far more interesting than what the show does, which is essentially strap a huge band-aid onto a severe emotional problem.

[CrazyInAlabama]

I can't wait for the rerun of this one tonight.    This one has a lot of action.     Unfortunately, it's past my bedtime, so I have to DVR it. 

[JunkFoodTV]

5 hours ago, CrazyInAlabama said:

I can't wait for the rerun of this one tonight.    This one has a lot of action.     Unfortunately, it's past my bedtime, so I have to DVR it. 

Same here. Too busy canning peaches. 😩 But it's a "good" one. Gee, maybe Jimmy will come back this time! 😍

[CrazyInAlabama]

As I recall, she keeps mentioning Jimmy, and thinks he'll come back someday.    If he's smart, he moved to Tierra del Fuelgo, and left no forwarding address.    

I hate how Erica says her family doesn't care about her.   Her niece was doing everything for her, the sister came to Houston repeatedly to help her, and traveled with her.  She was only living with Jimmy for two months, before they decided to go back to California, so she could sell her collectibles (worthless junk).  Then they were going to buy a home together in Houston.     I love that Erica says her junky statues and 'collectibles' should earn thousands for the house down payment.  That stuff wasn't worth what she paid for it when she bought it.    I wonder how many tens of thousands she spent on that stuff? 

 I think Jimmy was smart to see what a hoarder Erica is, how needy she is and focused only on herself, and run for the hills.   I wish him all the best.   If he would have stayed with Erica, he would have been living in a hoard, with all of those beady eyes from the little statues staring at him, taking care of Erica forever, and have a terrible life.   

I loathe David, who dumps his girlfriend because he thinks he can do better since he's down below 400 lbs.    I wonder if he's still with the next girlfriend that he dumped Mary for?    

Benji is the one I'm rooting for, he's a kind person, who is trying to lose weight for the right reasons, and wants to do better for his family.     Benji was down to 218 at the beginning of this episode.    However, Benji gaining 30 lbs. between appointments, and then wanting skin removal was bizarre.  I do love Dr. Now asking Benji "Do you have a medical degree I don't know about?".     

Erica's session with Lola was bizarre.   It think Erica feeling sick was after she realized that Lola wasn't going to tell her that Jimmy will be coming back to her, and keep waiting for him.   Then when the ambulance comes, her voice over tells the truth, she's eaten through another surgery.   When Dr. Now said that Erica had stretched her stomach out to the pre-surgery size (after the second surgery), and maybe more, I really disagree that she needed another surgery.   She will eat though this too.  When she basically needs an ambulance, because Lola disagreed with her, and Erica only needs an antacid, then she's too sick mentally to give her more surgery. 

Not fitting into the MRI (or is it a CAT scan?) told me how much weight she gained.   I really think she was using the walker again so she could hunch over, and not show her weight gain so much.   I think the reason she was using a cab or ride share was because she couldn't fit behind the wheel any longer.     

That's why she shipped her car back to California too, instead of trying to drive. 

Erica is doing weight loss to please others (Jimmy, Dr. Now), and she doesn't care about it at all.   My understanding is Gall Bladder removal will give her bad issues from eating too much fat, so she should be sick the second she can go back on solid foods, and get to a drive thru.    Doing Gastric Bypass on her was a waste of time.    I'm wondering if Erica's stomach pain after her fall, after the third surgery, was going back to solid foods too soon?  I bet it wasn't just a fall that ruptured a couple of sutures.  

Benji's local transport business would do very well in Houston.    Lots of smaller furniture and appliance stores don't deliver, but have a list of people to contact for transportation, and delivery.  

Erica still whining about Jimmy at the end of the episode is pathetic. 

Edited August 6, 2020 by CrazyInAlabama

[Wanda]

On 7/27/2020 at 7:49 PM, Ralphster said:

I have been wondering if there really is a 5% success rate, to be honest. Melissa Morris was probably the most famous success story, and Dr. Now waved her hither and yon as an example of how awesome his "program" is. Except I believe she's now around 300 pounds, maybe more. I'd be happy to be proved wrong on this; I'm basing this on a "Where are they now?" for her that aired recently. People who are mentally ill enough to eat their way into 600+ pounds need serious, intensive therapy, something that Lola cannot provide. Dr. Paradise seems slightly better, but neither of them seem to really zero in on people's issues in the mini-sessions we are shown. I also think that Dr. Now replaces one unhealthy eating disorder with another; he needs to steer clear of the food pyramid and embrace keto, for his patients are all severely diabetic when they come to see him. They need to learn how to eat fat, and eat intuitively, and to manage their anxiety. Every last patient has what seems to be unbearable anxiety; I've been there, and it's hell. I just don't really see how Dr. Now's shitty "program" helps people long-term, and his patients' long-term stories seem to bear this skepticism out.

Check out Diana. She did awesome, she did it the right way and gives total credit to Dr Now and I have no doubt she will stay on track.

[Ralphster]

On 8/6/2020 at 10:46 AM, Wanda said:

On 7/27/2020 at 4:49 PM, Ralphster said:

I have been wondering if there really is a 5% success rate, to be honest. Melissa Morris was probably the most famous success story, and Dr. Now waved her hither and yon as an example of how awesome his "program" is. Except I believe she's now around 300 pounds, maybe more. I'd be happy to be proved wrong on this; I'm basing this on a "Where are they now?" for her that aired recently. People who are mentally ill enough to eat their way into 600+ pounds need serious, intensive therapy, something that Lola cannot provide. Dr. Paradise seems slightly better, but neither of them seem to really zero in on people's issues in the mini-sessions we are shown. I also think that Dr. Now replaces one unhealthy eating disorder with another; he needs to steer clear of the food pyramid and embrace keto, for his patients are all severely diabetic when they come to see him. They need to learn how to eat fat, and eat intuitively, and to manage their anxiety. Every last patient has what seems to be unbearable anxiety; I've been there, and it's hell. I just don't really see how Dr. Now's shitty "program" helps people long-term, and his patients' long-term stories seem to bear this skepticism out.

Check out Diana. She did awesome, she did it the right way and gives total credit to Dr Now and I have no doubt she will stay on track.

Yeah, she did, but she's one out of how many?

[Ralphster]

@CrazyInAlabama I want to applaud your post so much! I agree with every single point that you made. Erica needing an antacid instead of emergency surgery cracked me up. Like, Dr. Now, she needs a Tums and possibly a Xanax, not surgery! It's true, though; Erica lacks any sort of self-knowledge and is deluded enough to truly believe that others automatically share her worldview. Hence, she really was expecting Lola to coddle her in her fantasy that The Amazing Jimmy would come back to her Someday. Instead, Lola was trying to prepare her for a Jimmy-less future. Erica could not handle that; I think Jimmy cracked her psyche in some way. She reached out to him too soon in her "journey," because she is someone who needs someone to be codependent with and I think she knew her family was done playing that role, so she needed a new patsy. Enter Jimmy, who has already left the building.

Dr. Now made a serious blunder by giving her a THIRD weight loss surgery. That made no sense and made me wonder if she just has good insurance or something. You have to be REALLY big to not fit into a CT machine; she ate her way through surgery after surgery, which is truly impressive (and not in a good way). I agree with your theory that she didn't fall in the shower, but instead ate through her sutures. Until Erica can be honest with herself about her motives and what she wants from life, she will just keep lumbering onward in a state of dull panic, clearing supermarket after supermarket of every single chocolate fudge cake to be had.

I too was confused about her "collectibles." They looked like mass-produced, made-in-China junk. I was wondering if I was missing something about their Speshulness(TM). Why would she think they were worth enough for a down payment on a house? I guess her life skills really are that bad. I'm not entirely sure she should live by herself. But who would want to live with her??

[cynicat]

5 hours ago, Ralphster said:

Yeah, she did, but she's one out of how many?

Assuming there have been about 100 or so participants, having 5 succeed would bear out the stats.  I think they've had a few more than 5.

[Ralphster]

I'm just skeptical about both how success is measured in this context and about how much weight the contestants have kept off. To me, success means keeping one's weight within a normal BMI, maybe a few points over, but definitely not in the 'obese' category. Melissa is still obese. She is not a success story to me. I don't know if any of them are still within a healthy weight range. I don't know where we can go to check this, either. All we have are selfies for the most part and it's hard to tell just from photos how much people weigh; some of the taller contestants in particular carried their weight pretty well.

[Wanda]

11 hours ago, Ralphster said:

Yeah, she did, but she's one out of how many?

There’s a 5% success rate for everyone who has this surgery, not just those selected for a reality show that wants drama. So if only 1 or 2 people out of say 20 on this show who actually get the surgery are successful (and Nikki the costume designer from an earlier season is another long term success), there’s your percentage. 
 

the last couple of seasons many haven’t even gotten the surgery so shouldn’t be counted

2 hours ago, Ralphster said:

I'm just skeptical about both how success is measured in this context and about how much weight the contestants have kept off. To me, success means keeping one's weight within a normal BMI, maybe a few points over, but definitely not in the 'obese' category. Melissa is still obese. She is not a success story to me. I don't know if any of them are still within a healthy weight range. I don't know where we can go to check this, either. All we have are selfies for the most part and it's hard to tell just from photos how much people weigh; some of the taller contestants in particular carried their weight pretty well.

Success is being healthier at 280 lbs and able to take care of her children rather than being bed bound and about to die at any moment at nearly 700

 

 

[Ralphster]

I guess we'll have to agree to disagree on what 'success' means, for two reasons. One, I can't find anything that clearly states the 5% success rate refers to just patients who get surgery or to patients of his in general. All I can find are mentions to a "5% success rate among his patients." I'd be happy if anyone could clear this up. Two, and I am using Melissa as an example again, the weight that virtually all of his patients gain back isn't static. It is a steady regain and they don't just stay at 200, 250, 300 pounds; they're clearly heading back to where they used to be. It's great if they stayed at a certain weight that allowed them to take care of business, but long-term that doesn't seem to be the case. How many patients of his got down to less than 250 pounds and have stayed there? Not snarking, I seriously want to know. As far as I can tell, the number is maybe 2?

I don't see his program as setting up people for long-term success, merely as substituting one eating disorder with another. Going from overt rations to 1200 calories a day - considered the absolute bare minimum for women, but still 600 calories beneath what is considered the bare minimum for men - still doesn't teach his eating disordered patients a balanced intake, and it is widely thought to lead to starvation mode symptoms (a controversial topic at the moment). He needs to teach his patients that fat is their friend and they would probably feel a lot more satiated, and he needs to allow them 2,000 calories a day, for them to have any hope of healing their already destroyed metabolism. Then again, I don't think bariatric surgery is the greatest plan of attack for overeating. If the patients can lose weight on their own, then why subject themselves to lifelong nutrient deficiencies and the risk of chronic stomach pain? Basically he isn't teaching them a happy medium, where they can enjoy cake a few times a year. Instead he puts them on this ridiculously strict diet that not even I would bother following and they feel like thieves in the night whenever they have a cookie. That is still not a healthy relationship with food. Bottom line, I agree with almost everyone else posting here that they need intense therapy for probably the rest of their lives. Because with or without the surgery, they are still eating vast amounts of food compared to most people. Erica is a shining example that surgery doesn't fix anything if you aren't willing to fix yourself. In other words, those who want to succeed will do so without the surgery, while those who don't care will fail even with the surgery.

Edited August 10, 2020 by Ralphster

[CrazyInAlabama]

So, at the end of this episode (Erica's third I think), she has had stomach stapling (late teens), and two surgeries from Dr. Now, and ate through them too.    She'll never stop until it's too late. 

Still her family helps her.    I'm doubt I could be that selfless.    She turns everything around to herself, she's the center of everything.    SHe's actually one of the luckier poundticipants, she apparently has enough to live well on in a very expensive area, people actually run errands for her, and try to help her, and other people we've seen don't have that.     I wish she could have really tried after the surgeries, and regained her health.    

Edited January 8, 2023 by CrazyInAlabama