Auntie Anxiety

And Chris Laurita looks exactly like Caroline with that perpetual "I smell a fart" look on his face. I watched for about ten minutes but it was too stupid, even for me. And Sunday night is a busy television night. Having those grown children living at home (even if it is just for the show, which is a problem in and of itself since it's supposed to be a reality show) is just plain unhealthy. I told my sons (who are basically the ages of Albie and Chritifer) that, although I'd love for them to live at home after college (not really, but I had to sound nice), it would be unhealthy for them AND for me. Too much staged "frolic," too much "hilarity" ensuing, too phony and much too much Manzo. I'm conflicted because I love the snark, but Caroline trying to channel Lucille Ball makes my stomach churn.

With a couple of side orders of entitlement.

Sing it, Sister Woman (tm Iyanla). My wallet was groaning listening to this bullshit. How many of these moms and kids am I supporting? Then the kids have their own kids and I am supporting even more of them. It's like a geometric progression. Where does it ever end? Remember the days when a son wanted to grow up to be a lawyer/plumber/carpenter/teacher just like his dad? What a role model. Guess what many of these sons will end up doing? Maybe they can have a contest to see who can father the most kids. And when are we going to stop rewarding women for having children out of wedlock? Did they ever hear about birth control pills? Why was Jay the one in charge (or not) of condoms? And I don't give a shit about broken promises. When someone thinks that the likes of Jay, whose dick must be magical or something because I don't get the appeal otherwise, is going to give her what she wants, she needs a good, strong kick in the ass. Maybe it would get her head straight. The Sister Women would have all been better off with a turkey baster.

That's what lawyers are for. Surely the lawyers told them what to do, but lawyers can't make you do what you are supposed to do. I don't know what's going to happen about that heinous mansion (also known as House of Cards), but I've seen schemes and shenanigans up close and personal, so here's a guess: The asking price is too high and they fully expect that no one will make an offer. They will buy them time until the bank finally decides to foreclose and puts it up for a foreclosure auction (banks do not want to be homeowners). Foreclosure proceedings also take time, what with public notifications, etc. Usually the starting bid is pretty low as the bank will take what it can get, even if it means 50 cents on the dollar. The Fraudices have someone buy it at the auction for a bargain basement price and they find their way back into it. And there is nothing anyone can do about it. I got an incredible education from watching my ex operate. He and Joe Guidice are like conjoined twins separated at the brain.

LotusFlower, not only did she participate in the scheme, she had the nerve to say she didn't know anything about the rental property even though she would write "rent" on the blank line on the check. Her ability to so blatantly lie is breathtaking. Her ability to believe she wouldn't be found out is even more breathtaking.

This is from The Daily Mail U.K. There may be some trouble in paradise, according to this article. Hope I got the link right. http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2780873/Are-Teresa-Joe-heading-divorce-Giudice-couple-growing-distant-feeling-strain-sentenced-jail.html

What good does money put aside for educations and rainy days do? No one will be "jealous" unless you show them your bank statements. The Fraudices (thanks, Zoeysmom?) like things to be far more ostentatious than that. If you can't show it off, why bother?

Or they can just steal Gia's identity and start getting credit cards and loans in her name. I tell my sons to check their credit information regularly for this very reason.

Their mortgage payments are just the tip of the iceberg. What about utilities, health insurance, homeowners, life (maybe?), healthcare and car insurance, gas, vehicles, etc. I'm single, grown kids who are on their own, I don't live an extravagant lifestyle, no debts but the bills really add up. Even the vet bills for my dog are expensive and she's rarely sick. Sometimes people who are facing a foreclosure sue the bank, saying that they didn't know what they were signing when they agreed to the mortgage. It doesn't fly, but does buy time (a year or two) and they're not paying the mortgage because the house will eventually be auctioned off anyway, so why pay? The bank (or government) may also be able to weigh in on the asking price; banks/the government don't want to be homeowners and would prefer getting 50 cents on the dollar to not getting anything at all. This is all anecdotal and I'm just speaking from experience here (not my own but what I have observed others going through). Nope, it will never go away. They'll be living under this shadow forever (my advice would be that they should change their name when they get of age) and it will even be mentioned in their (my four beautiful daughters', that is) obituaries. Thanks, Mom and Dad.

I don't really understand this, since it was my belief that the holder of the first mortgage gets dibs. Anyone with a lien on it (like workmen or vendors) won't see a penny, ever. Whatever wages that the government KNOWS about would probably be garnished, but my guess is that Teresa and Joe will attempt to make cash deals or deal under the table so there would be no way to track the exchange of money, provided they can find a person or entity willing to go along with this. Juicy is seemingly "connected," so it isn;t out of the realm of possibilities. I'm spending much too much time over-thinking this Guidice crap. I desperately hope that they don't end up having to go on public assistance because there is no way I want my tax dollars to be spent on EBT cards for these fools. That would be such a slap in the face to the law-abiding public.

No expert here either, but my guess is that the debt goes unpaid, sort of like the debt that O.J, Simpson owes to the Goldman family due to the civil case that they won. It is a moral victory but no one expects full payment. This is another thing that bugs the hell out of me when people like the Guidices continue to refinance their homes over and over again. It's like they use the home as an ATM, get the money out, spend it and it is never to be seen again. Eventually it all catches up to them, but they shrug their shoulders, say that you can't get blood from a stone, and let the taxpayers/future mortgage holders/general public clean up their messes.

There's a story in the NY Daily News which I don't think has been mentioned yet. It's about the possibilities that Bravo is considering what with Teresa heading for jail. Most of the options are ones that have already been considered here. (Sorry, don't know how to do links.)

People like Teresa and Joe think that judges' orders are nothing more than mere suggestions. And Joe probably also thought that nothing would happen to him since he's not an American citizen. My guess is that their lawyers are relieved to be done with this pair of numbskulls.

This can probably be checked online by searching the Registry of Deeds in whatever county their house is. These are public documents. Trust me, you can find out a shitload of information at the registries; I've been following my ex's travails for years. Before it went online, I spent hours in the stacks and I found a lot of documents that helped support my side of the divorce. Now I have it bookmarked on my computer. So what if I'm obsessed?

Teresa can take over the kitchen at Club Fed until the inmates complain about how she puts in too many ingredientses. New cookbook title: Fedilicious

I want to sit next to you on the bus to hell, BecauseIsaidso. If they were all about the kids, why didn't they give them an ounce of thought before they got caught?

I need a cigarette. I've been dreaming about this day ever since Season 1, when it was clear very early on that the Guidices lived way above their means.

People Magazine reports that the judge said she considered probation, but decided she needed to send a message. So glad she did.

Persnickety, see my post about my ex's foreclosure auction :-) I haven't watched WWHL in a long time but I've already set my DVR. Gold.

This strikes me as very funny and extremely meta. Come on, Judge. I haven't gotten a damned thing done all day long.

This day is almost as delicious as the day I found out that my ex's home was scheduled for a foreclosure auction. Sadly it was postponed, but I considered going with a bag lunch and a lawn chair.

This is better than any episode of RH ever! How the mighty (stupid and obnoxious) have fallen.

I guess the only saving grace vis a vis their lawyers is that the Guidices didn't declare that they are indigent, thus the taxpayers aren't footing the legal bills.

If that's the case, their lawyers should be shot.

Am surprised Joe's lawyer didn't say that the reason they didn't submit tax returns was because the dog ate it. Speaking of dogs, maybe the Guidice's German Shepherd attack dogs will be adopted by Bernie Kerik. Caroline Manzo can hook them up.