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They called the dude who's helping Shower Harvey her "seeing-eye bro" and "comfort bro". I laughed out loud.

Catching up: I really enjoyed that wedding ceremony. It sort of humanized the religion of the red god, since most of what we've seen so far has been blood sacrifices and shadow baby assassins. The symbolism when they jumped through the fire (two people enter, one couple comes out) was pretty neat. I think Jon was incredibly smart arranging this marriage -- the Thenns (in the book) are organized much more like traditional Westerosi, and now he'll have basically a friendly neighbor to the south-east. I also think Jon was incredibly stupid: "the Watch takes no part..." except this is a massive interference. It's her subconscious saying "yeah, maybe you should look back and reevaluate things." "Where ever whores go" is just Tyrion perseverating. Book 5:

One of the characters (I forget who, they blend together) mentioned that The Beast was probably another teen the Doctors had worked on who doesn't even realize he turns into a monster at night. So, Mason? Or another generically handsome Express-for-Men underwear model? I can't remember if Mason has ever been in the same scene with The Beast, or otherwise involved in a different scene that was going on simultaneously.

She's also assuming that Charlotte's sympathetic and tragic backstory is actually true. Everything in the midseason finale was from her PoV, and she's the very definition of "unreliable narrator". I for one don't buy that anything she said that night wasn't distorted or an out-right fabrication. Not that the show will address any of this (unless they need to retcon something for plot reasons).

Allison probably bought their house (assuming Kenneth doesn't still own it) with life insurance money from Jessica. Completely random: the broswatchplltoo guys refer to Sara Harvey's man servant as her "comfort bro". I blurt laughed at that.

I hadn't heard the Theon Durden theory before. If the hooded man Theon encountered is supposed to be himself, I assume that it wasn't actually a time-traveling apparition or anything, but was just all in his head. Psychological rather than mystical, if that makes any sense. Hee, that was my immediate thought too. "wow, that was really good, things are getting interesting! I can't wait to read...[record scratch]... oh, another Tyrion chapter". Book 5 spoiler:

With a title like "The Gloves Are On" I assume this episode will deal with what exactly happened to Sara Harva;dslfkjhtwyh;lkgng. Sorry, I fell asleep and my head hit the keyboard. I so don't care about that character.

Part of my "the show did this better" list -- season 5 condensed his wallowing into a few scenes, and allowed Tyrion to become proactive again. I think part of the reason Tryion is so wallowy has to do with him being on a sloooow path to get to Meereen at the right time in GRRM's narrative. Hence all the detours he takes; otherwise he'd arrive ahead of schedule. I've speculated before that GRRM's editor just runs it through spell check a couple of times then slaps a sticky on the front of the galley saying "loved it! Please don't fire me!". Evidently the editor tried to get him to drop a couple of instances of the phrase "words are wind" and he wouldn't. I can't imagine an editor getting any traction with any substantive comments.

Kira's test in the desert was so annoying. Hey, you cut the bad guy and got the exact same wound on your own body, maybe try something different instead of getting wounded two more times in exactly the same way? Idiot. Other than potentially getting another adversary (skinwalkers come to kill Kira), that whole diversion seemed pointless. Also, Kira says to Scott, "You came back for me!" cue troo-luv kissy scene. What? Kira left him. The shot compositing with Stiles and Scott in the Jeep which was obviously on a sound stage were distractingly bad. I kept thinking of the SNL "Toonces the Driving Cat" skits. And the less they show of CGI Beast the better. Theo seemed to be getting turned on by Malia beating the crap out of him. I feared for a moment that they'd kiss. I'm glad that they didn't go that route, but I have no idea how he'll be able to help her just because he knows how the DD found their test subjects. Lydia's banshee lessons are boring. We know how this is going to end, so it isn't holding my interest. I think the flash-forward scenes they showed in 5.01 and 5.11 were a narrative mistake. I loved Stile's line about Liam: "If you're gonna get the band back together, you can't leave out the drummer." Gratuitous shirtless hot guy, I love this show. Though it did send me scrambling to Google to see how old the actor is (19, so I don't feel like a complete perv, only moderately pervy). I don't completely understand his character though. He's Invisiboy, scared of his own shadow, the most timid of Theo's pack. Yet with Mason he's very aggressive.

There's a twist I could get behind. Veronica: "I know you didn't kill Charlotte, Spencer... because I did. Actually it was all of the parents who were in town that night. Pam lured her to the church, Bryon bonked her on the back of the head, and Ashley and I chucked her body out of the steeple. She was a monster who tortured our children for years and deserved to die." At least the motive would make sense instead of whatever half-baked nonsense they come up with. The Salk Institute does research in all of those areas, in different departments. Emily was being very cagey with her dialog when she said "we do research on...". "We" in that case meant "The Salk Institute as a whole" not "the group I work for". Unless maybe she's a janitor and empties the trash in all the different departments.

Smooth move, destroying the tape that exonerates 3/4 Liars. Now you're all suspects with no alibis except each other, congratulations you idiots. I don't think Emily has cancer necessarily - that was just blond coffee shop manager chick telling her story about being sick. It's got to be something that she thinks she can hide successfully, and chemotherapy doesn't work that way -- it's debilitating and her hair would fall out. I'm calling this now: Blonde walking into the church as seen by Aria and Ezra was not Charlotte. We only saw the back of her head, and she didn't have the flowers with her. It was probably Mona in disguise for... reasons... inadequately explained reasons that we won't hear until 6.19, and she saw who the real killer was. Or saw something that leads them to another red herring for season 7. Shower Harvey now has a signature move, it's "turn your head sideways and glare". Probably just as well that she doesn't have any dialog because the actress is blah. Caleb and Spencer fucked that night in Madrid, right? A one night stand that they've been thinking about ever since, at least that was the vibe I got. Her backstory hasn't been explained, though I really don't care. She disappeared the day after Ali went missing, so right before their sophomore year. Charlotte had her out privileges revoked at the same time, and didn't start going out again until after she met Mona, so Sara was off doing whatever, and was not in the dollhouse, for two years. Wait, sorry, I forgot: I don't care. Sounded vaguely Australian to me, but it sort of came and went. It was weird. He's apparently from a wealthy family, which explains Hanna's opulent lifestyle: she's golddigging on her fiance's dime. Aria's new BF looked like a hipster douchebag.

It's a filler chapter, but it's also significant in irritating Dany fans. She does her version of Juliet's "is that a nightingale or a lark?" pining over Daario, she momentarily thinks something like "If only Quentin looked like that Gerry Drinkwater fellow, who is a cool drink of water oh my." and she laughs at an inopportune moment . She's chuckling about her "Frog turning into a prince" internal joke, but to others it looks like she's mocking Quentin to his face. She's showing a lot of childish and unlikeable traits. For those of us who are a little bored with her continuing adventures in Slaver's Bay and want to see her head west, it was another missed opportunity.

I think Ned went north and called his banners before he married Cat. The Lord of Sisterton told Davos that he helped ship Ned north because at the time he was headed there, Gulltown was still loyal to Aerys so Ned couldn't get a ship there. Gulltown was the first battle. Ned married Cat after he headed south with his army in order to secure the Riverlands alliance. He knocked her up then headed south to Stoney Sept to relieve Robert at the Battle of the Bells. It’s a good argument against Ashara Dayne being Jon’s mother, since when would they have had time to conceive, unless Ned took a short vacation between Stoney Sept and the Trident.

Listening to the Bros Watch PLL too podcast, they reminded me of something I noticed when I watched. Hanna and Ashley's first scene, Ashley says something that included the phrase "what that person did to you." It was obviously ADR, like really blatant. Anyone know what they dubbed over? I'm guessing she said something more harsh that they decided to change to avoid more backlash. Also, they referred to the guy accompanying Sarah Harvey to the funeral as her "seeing eye bro" which made me chuckle.

Well, assuming the Others are actually evil (and not just doing a ridiculous "you kids get offa my lawn!" to everyone living north of the Wall), Bran & Bloodraven & the CotF seem to be on the side of good since they fight against wights. I get the impression that they are not, however, on the same side as the Lord of Light and his cronies. Mel caught a glimpse of Bloodraven and Bran and immediately assumed they were servants of the Great Other. Mel is batting less than 0.500 on correctly interpreting her visions, but there's a lot about the Old Gods group that conflicts with LoL's group. The red priests continually harp about"For the night is dark and full of terrors", how Great Other is darkness and death, etc. They're very anti-darkness. Then you get this passage, Bloodraven talking to Bran: "'Never fear the darkness, Bran.... The strongest trees are rooted in the dark places of the earth. Darkness will be your cloak, your shield, your mother's milk. Darkness will make you strong. If only you knew the power of the dark side. Join me and together we can rule the galaxy!" I may be misquoting a bit, but Bloodraven is definitely pro-darkness. Reconciling these two groups to get them to fight along side each other against the common foe has the potential to be just as fucked up as Jon trying to get the Wildlings and the Nightswatch to work together.

Terra Nova: Ok, that makes sense.

Just annoys the hell out of me how they completely assassinated her character on the show. Prior to season 5 when we found out they were cutting the character of Arianne, a lot of people speculated that they'd keep the Dorne plot somewhat intact and give Arianne's stuff to Ellaria. Instead, they completely inverted her, and to add insult to injury, took the three wildly different Sand Snakes and made them into blandly interchangeable cartoons. Pah. Even though this was more set up (giving the Sand Snakes their assignments), it's one of my favorite chapters. I like how Doran has finally expanded his little conspiracy. I also like how he's added 2 + 2 and gotten 5: bunch of ships carrying an army stopped in Lys to take on supplies + headed this way = Daenerys. Nope! But still worth checking out. One minor addition to the "GRRM needed an editor" list - the feast for Balon Swann was seven dishes, to honor the seven gods and the seven kingsguard... then he proceeds to list 8 courses. Also, one page has Balon Swann trying a spoonful of the spicy snake stew; few pages later, Hotah remarks to himself "why is he sweating? He didn't even try the stew". In Winterfell:

Jojen paste theory time! Book 5 spoiler I did notice the parallel between the Bran's reaction to the weirwood paste and Dany's to Shade of the Evening wine back at the House of the Undying. Started off horrible then became wonderful by the bottom of the bowl/glass. I don't know if this is supposed to be drawing our attention to the similarities between the Old Gods and the Undying, or just GRRM inadvertently repeating himself. Since the boy Lyanna was playing with was younger than her, you can infer that it was Benjen. Brown-haired slender girl kissing the tall knight is speculated to be Old Nan kissing Ser Duncan the Tall, possibly abackdoor pilot to a future D&E novella. Since Bran's flashbacks seem to be going earlier and earlier with each scene shift (the trees are regressing around him), I don't know that we were supposed to recognize any of them. I was pretty curious about the pregnant woman who wanted revenge, but I doubt it's actually relevant. [small voice] I don't like Penny. Moqorro, OTOH, is one of my favorite minor characters introduced in this book. You're referring to the thing that Tyrion sees through the mists in the Sorrows? I always thought it was just a sickly bat. ETA -- spoiler tagged that first bit because

George Lucas describing the plots of the prequels: "It's like poetry -- it rhymes. Each stanza rhymes with the next. Hopefully it'll work." [spoiler: it didn't] I can buy that Sara might feel that way. She is, after all, insane. What I really can't buy is that the PLLs would feel any guilt whatsoever. "You got injured after we disabled the bomb you had planted? Good. Actually, not good -- it's too bad you weren't killed, you lunatic. Get offa my lawn."

I forgot to mention this meta-rant: ABCFamily's new branding is quite stupid. They had that 2 min long montage before the show with various celebrities yelling "Freeform!" at the camera. Harrison Ford looked like he had no clue what that meant or where he even was. I didn’t realize the network had changed its name so I had no idea what they were screaming about. I thought it was some new social media application, or maybe a hygiene product.

Adding fuel to my "Toby and Caleb are dating" fever-dream: Toby says that they went fishing together one summer. That was the cover story that the protagonists of Brokeback Mountain used to hide their trysts. Coincidence? I think not! #TeamTaleb

As I am an ignoramus sometimes, I had to look up the Salk Institute. Salk Institute for Biological Studies. My guess is that Emily will reveal that she's not working there, but is actually a test subject because she's got ____ disease. I have no idea if the Salk Institute actually does clinical trials, but I doubt the writers do either.

Thank you for that mental image. I must now go gouge out my mind's eye. Heeeee One thing I appreciated about Mel's chapter is that it confirmed for me that she is a true-believer and not a charlatan. I also enjoyed the irony of her being considered one of the best readers-of-the-flames, considering how inaccurate she is. I'm curious what Shimpy (and everyone else) thinks of this passage: She thinks it means Eastwatch will be under attack, but even questions her own interpretation since the towers didn't look right. My opinion is that she's seeing the Ironborn's assault on the Reach, but I'm not sure why. I'm open to correction since it seems disconnected from everything else she sees.

The comment was about Carice's behavior right after Stannis stopped choking her, that she acted like something coming back to life. It really is quite creepy to see. Given her internal monologue in the book about how she needs to remind herself to eat and only sleeps for catnaps (and hopes to eventually no longer require any sleep) I get the impression that, functionally, she's not all that different from a wight, just more sentient.

Spencer asked Veronica "where's Dad?" "He's fundraising". So I guess they're back together. I wonder if Veronica's campaign slogan is something like "I'm incorruptible because ALL my family skeletons are already out of the closet." She was setting a bomb, ffs. They would have been within their rights to kill her to stop it. Ali said something like "Shower Harvey won't be at the hearing because of how her criminal case was resolved". I have no clue what that means, because as far as I'm concerned she should have been locked up. Patty Hearst served time despite being kidnapped and brainwashed. I just got a mental image of the season ending with a classic Agatha Christie "detective gather the suspects in the parlor" scene, with Spencer as Miss Marple.