smartyshorts

Lesson for today, keep an eye on your shit, stupid tourists! I did find it odd that when Ivy fell (and screamed, if I recall), none of the milling crowd stopped to even GLANCE in her direction. No police no rescue, not even a hunky stranger to at least yell and point. Do people go flying off that bridge all the time or something? Do they think its just performance art? I officially do not like the attempt at curly hair they have Brooke in. But the dress is YOWSA! Aly needs something to do. I think its about time Oliver whisked her away on vacation or something.

I was laughing from the beginning til the end of Friday's show. From Quinn popping up from behind a car as Liam drove off to the airport, to her clutching her magazine and seething as she sat RIGHT behind Liam and Ivy listening in, to her non chalant noodging of Ivy off the bridge...I am convinced Quinn needs a theme song to be playing subtly in the background when she's on. Or does she and OI haven't noticed? Hm. Between Liam's run across Paris, kind of like Ridge's full sprint across the biggest hotel courtyard I've ever seen and his pained "I have to fart, but I might shit" look of panicked indecision..it was all comedy gold. So now Hope is the SOLE model at an international photo shoot? They couldn't have had a couple of background pretties in bright dresses to flip their hair and place their hands on their hips too? Why go to all the trouble of permits and flights and gowns and French photographers for ONE model? And isn't Business Suit Maya supposed to be the Face of HFTF, shouldn't she be modelling some Project Runway round 4 dresses too? Aside from that, I almost don't care how many failed wedding attempts any couple has now, as long as they keep giving me these gorgeous location shoots! It doesn't hurt my brain as much if I don't think about the stories, and just focus on the pretty.

The big deal as I see and understand it is because Liam is balking at going to Paris with the one Love of his Life because he's got to work. Got. To. Work. When we never see him even AT work. So his character is the one making it a big deal. I think the last "work" he did at Spencer was the story about the animal shelter. Even if he couldn't get away that day, he could at least say "Let me tie up some loose ends at work, I'll meet you there." Does anyone know if Lope are actually engaged again? Charlie and Pam might be on to something, they just have the wrong target. I think it was LittleIggy who predicted that maybe Ol' Bubbling Cauldrin Quinn had something to do with the Mexican jewel merchant's convenient death and strange bequeathment to Wyatt. Is there some reason that Maya is hanging around making travel and photo shoot arrangements with Rick and Ivy et al? I guess I can understand why Oliver's there, Aly keeps him close...or maybe he chooses to stay close to Aly...but why Business Suit Barbie?

Wait, so are Hope and Liam engaged again? Or just back together and "talking about getting married or starting a life together", or whatever they talk about? I must've missed Liam asking again. And Liam saying he can't drop everything and go to Paris becuase of his job made me actually laugh right out loud. When was the last time we actually saw him even at the Spencer P offices? It was before Ridge fell in da water, I'm pretty sure. The fact that they've been having the same conversation for the last week or so at FORRESTER Creations, belies his claims that "work needs him!". And if Hope really saw the diamond as a boost to the line, why didn't she accept it that way at the basement press conference? Just say, on behalf of the Hope for the Future line, WE accept this generous gift and will be sure to incorporate its magic in our new Fall fashions (or whatever, you get where I'm going) instead of saying "Yeah sure" and putting the dang priceless 50 carat diamond in her romper pocket.

Wouldn't you know it, the ONE DAY when something interesting finally happens...preempted! Although today's spisode with Bill talking Ridge down off his crazy ledge was pretty awesome. I see why he's such a business mogul now, hell I SAW what happened, I didn't fall out of a helicopter (or THROW myself out, which is how it looked to me), and Bill had me questioning what actually happened! Myrna can go kick rocks now.

Ridge didn't just fall out of a shoulder belt..he slipped himself out of the shoulder belt on order to fall. And Brooke pissed me off. Just sort of jogging along with a guy who was supposed to be forcibly pulling her away from her true love. They might as well have been hand in hand, purposely trotting off into the sky together.

Oh how I chuckled and laughed and generally guffawed as Ridge flew, then taxi'd, then speed boated (and then drove on the sand ....that boat with tank treads on it was kind of cool) then ran and ran and ran. Up the stairs, through the garden, past fountains and through courtyards..running, running, running full speed for a half hour. Nothing in his hands, or any sort of indication that he is carrying anything to show Brooke to shock her into walking away from her rug side wedding. (I can't wait to see where the tablet appears from!) And I hated both Brooke's hair AND really harsh, thick makeup that accentuated wrinkles in her face that she probably doesn't even really have. And her dress looked like a bathrobe. If that's Bill's idea of wedding planning, its up there with the Red Wedding as a fail. Location was great though, even if the dialog was very Travel Loggish. Is Bill Middle Eastern? Why was THIS location so important for him? I want to believe from Katie's facial expressions that she's getting a clue. So if Quinn doesn't want a relationship and doesn't mind being the chick on the side...why would she care if Bill is married? From what she's saying, it seems she doesn't have a problem hooking up with married or otherwise committed guys. Or is she lying about that? Hard to tell with this Cipher.

It's hours later and I still can't stop laughing about $Bill giving RJ a swordy necklace. Ridge is gonna blow his fool STACK. That sword necklace has got to be the dumbest ...thing. Have there been other oft used props on this show that are so recognized and ridiculous? And NO I am not counting Taylor's lips. I hope Katie likes the taste of crow.

I honestly think the over the top outburst from Aly at this juncture is due to Taylor basically sneaking up on her while she was in her Oliver Love haze and dropping that steaming turd of news on her that Daddy's dating Mommy's killer. I really feel like if this info had come from THORNE, like it was supposed to, in a controlled calm setting sure Aly would've been upset and maybe distraught but it wouldn't have been this overwhelming emotional screaming ax weilding. And thats ALL Taylor's fault. I was disappointed when Aly put that ax down though, I'm not ashamed to say. How long do we have to look at Katie's "More meaningful than diamonds" string ring? Does she shower with that thing on?

Damn but I was waiting for that axe to come up off the table! Seemed like even the axe was getting royally pissed at Taylor. The way she snuck up on Ally was just asking for confrontation. You don't have to be a mental health professional (HA HA HA!!!) to know you just don't DO that to someone when you KNOW they violently despise you, unless you've got a weapon in you hand! I love LOVE Ally now that she is obsessed with that sanctimonious clown that is Taylor, instead of worrying about what happens with Hope. Preach it girl! With your bouncy shiny hair. I think I'm more in love than even Oliver right now. yes the "Oh NOOOOO" scream at the end was just, unfortunately timed or something. Someone needs to throw down some shiny objects to distract Quinn.

Sweet Lord above or below, did $Bill really wake Brooke up with a recording of a horse whinny? Did that really happen? Held down just below his buckle? Was that a hint of some kind? I was repulsed and oddly fascinated by that. And Quinn needs to maybe join a book club or something. Bill's right...Wyatt will be FINE. Unless he's had some love related mental breakdown in his past and that's why his Momma is all up in his business. Maybe she's not the craziest one in that family! I could get behind that, Wyatt being a Norman Bates type simmering psychopath. Makes sense with how quickly he became OBSESSED with all things Hope. PS that "arrangement" that Liam proposed, and laid down ALL the rules for...how did Hope not laugh right in his face? Let me get this straight, for every minute I spend with him, I have to spend a minute with you. And no sex. And the whole time I am with one, I have to hear one of you bitch about the other? Sounds fantastic, sign me up! Would Liam have agreed to that arrangement if it had been proposed by Wyatt? Sounds like Montage -a-palooza is gonna be starting soon.