[S06.E21: Reunion Part 1]

 

…three parts…really.  I'll just skip the reunion and get the abbreviated version here.

 

Cyberjawa, you are already miles ahead and smarter than me. I just can't quit these bitches. I will see this out until the bitter end. 

 

 

LuAnn was pretty darned gracious during the LuMan discussion. And during the entire First Look, actually.

Luann is too good a sport when it comes to those two. Luann could have easily decimated both those clowns this season and she didn't. The countess maybe a bit pretentious but I do get the sense that she at least strives to have some manners and be gracious to others as opposed to the Hostess with the least Sonja and Pinot bloated Ramona.

[S06.E20: The Last Leg]

 

Aviva just left me wondering if Johnny Cochran went to Vassar... Her "schoolmarm" ruler-banging speeches throughout her run on RHONY always seemed kind of like aggressive cross-examinations to me. Someone yelling "your honor I object!" would have fit right in.

Speaking of schoolmarm, mr. islandgal says Aviva reminds him of Miss Beadle (teacher from Little House on the Prairie). I was like "you sure you don't mean Miss Eliza Jane Wilder?" He was like, "nope, she reminds me of Miss Beadle." I took personal offense because Miss Beadle, with her lemon verbana smelling self, was far more fabulous and fashionable than Aviva could ever hope to be.

 

I don't know if the shock has worn off or what but the leg throw has turned into a big old meh for me. Aviva totally planned it but at this point so what (shoulder shrug). All these women come to the season finale party knowing they have to bring it because that is what is expected. Two seasons back perimenopausal Ramona tried to convince an audience that she might be pregnant. She probably just mixed up her results for Mario's mistress. The fact that Aviva planned it is no big whoop to me and is a bit hypocritical from women who have a season s/l and filming schedule which they discuss and plan out with production. This is no defense of Aviva but GMAFB ladies!

[S09.E14: Fully Loaded]

LOL at all the Eddie is an opportunist talk. No lies detected in this line of thinking if you ask me. However, I would go on to say that he is terrible at being one. Tamra is probably 2 seasons away from being bankrupt. Meaning that if she was fired I doubt very much she could continue her current lifestyle. I will say that Tamra doesn't seem to be a spendthrift with her money like Nene, who seems to be on a countdown to going broke. However, Tamra is completely dependent on RHOC. She doesn't have any lucrative side projects or endorsements as opposed to Kandi who has her music producing career, sex toys, plays, clothing stores, etc. Hell, Ryan seems to be better at being an opportunist than Eddie.

 

Eddie and Ryan seem to have a lot in common. They both depend on the kindness of family for work. Eddie was employment by his stepdad's law firm before he was fired due to an issue seeming to revolve around Eddie presenting himself as an owner when CA law forbids ownership in a law firm by laymen. Now Eddie is working at Tamra's gym. Ryan keeps getting jobs from family.  1st Simon, then Tamra at the gym and now working in his fiancee's gun shop. 

 

The more I think about the fiancee the weirder she seems. A 40 year old woman with 3 young girls hooking up with some tattooed rat faced, balding loser on instagram and bringing him around her kids and into her home within 3 months of dating. Gurrlll, look at your life. Look at your choices. Now she is tied to him for life because she is knocked up. This has all the ingredients necessary for a future 1 hour Snapped episode. The only question is who is going to be doing the snapping.

 

I have heard conflicting stories so can anyone confirm whether Ryan already has a kid and Tamra already is a grandmom?

[S01.E05: Gladys]

 

Was there another cult mentioned by the ATFEC guy that wasn't the GR or the Wayne cult?

I thought the existence or rather the extension of powers to an already existing federal agency to deal with cults in the aftermath of the event  was one of the only interesting things to come out of this episode. The offhand mentioning of the ATFEC brought to light what has been bothering me about this series that I hadn't been able to articulate and why I am having such a hard time swallowing this malarky. 

 

I expect that the 3 years was meant to put some distance from the shock, WTF'ery, mouring and confusion between the event occurrence and the start of the series. I expect that it was thought that a lot of the furor would have died away and the general pop would fallen into a mixture of resignation, mild to severe depression, acceptance and the majority would have moved on with their lives. I just have real trouble buying that. The reason being is that I would bet money on true religious fanaticism rearing its ugly head with a passion. I have no doubt that there would be some weirdo cults like the GR and Wayne stuff but I believe the majority would have flocked to the various established religious. Reason being is that I think must would think it was that whole left behind scenario - especially Christians because that is where the concept arises from.

 

I know it was mentioned in passing on the show that the authorities haven't come to a conclusion on what happened, however, I have no doubt religion would have filled the gap. I don't find that improbably or even likely. I find that damn near a certainty. Hell, man has never before witnessed a true unexplained phenomena (or miracle to some) and yet still has been using tales and stories from the Bible written thousands of years ago to justify wars (Crusades, Middle East) slavery, racism, sexism - you name the "ism", all in the name of G-d. To finally be confronted by having a percentage just up and vanish out of the thin air would have people losing their shit and trying to "get right." Or at the very opposite of the spectrum having people think all is futile and just become completely amoral which would see a rise in crime, etc. I just can't wrap my mind around so many logical people living life as they have always done afterwards. Just no! The lack of any acknowledgement of a rise in religious fervor makes this whole series just ring false and hollow to me. YMMV.

 

Back to the regularly scheduled programming - the first 5 minutes with the stoning was way more disturbing to me than I thought possible. I thought I was desensitized to violence but I guess not. Also, just last week I was wanting to break a baseball bat over all the GR members after that stunt with the break-ins. I guess I am just a big old mush ball. 

 

I have such on odd 'relationship' with Liv Tyler. I don't mind her as an actress (mostly due to LOTR) but her 'soft' voice has always gotten on my nerves. I can't wait until she takes her vow of silence. 

 

I am not enamored of Justin T or his body so I don't know what keeps me watching. I guess I am still intrigued by the concept but the execution has been disappointing so far. At this point it is going take a Sixth Sense type twist to make this a good series.

[S05.E09: Tell All]

I don't see the point of the so-called tell-all. It is more like a repeat all. Ain't nobody saying shit that is new or interesting. 

 

Biggest complaint - how the fuck are you going to have a cliffhanger announcement in the final episode and never even mention it during the "tell-all" season end?

 

I don't think Robyn is pregnant. I just believe her and Kody have perhaps agreed to start trying. 

 

I thought the Christine is too upset to stay was a whole lot of nothing. 

 

As usual, Robyn has the most to say but wasn't really saying anything. What else is new? No surprise that her daughters take after her as they seemed to monopolize the kids section.

 

No surprise that Robyn was the only wife that didn't have a problem with Kody spending too little time with her. Nice to know that she is still Kody's prize pig.

 

Are they trying to make the Richard family happen? Not interested. I don't watch that other plig family so I for damn sure ain't watching the Richards Family.

 

Damn Mariah! I don't like taking about a young girl's looks but I was surprised when I saw her. Those glasses did not help. Those type of hipster glasses are supposed to be ironical when worn by your zoe deschanel and taylor swift types. On Mariah? Not so much. 

 

I lol'ed when I heard they never got a dime from the investment firm. LOL! What venture capitalist worth shit would give those buffoons one red cent? I guess they are gonna have to pay off their mortgages using TLC money.

[S06.E20: The Last Leg]

Alls I can say (tm the Countess) is thank goodness Aviva's ailment wasn't uterine fibroids  or else she would have slapped pap smear results and transvaginal ultrasounds on the table and heaven knows what she would have pulled off or out and thrown on the floor. Be thankful for the little things.

 

I felt like the leg throwing (good Lord, what kind of world do we live in it when starting off a sentence like that makes total sense??) it was one of those situations when the trailers and the previews pretty much spoiled and showed it all because really there wasn't much more to it than what was already shown in the 30 sec commercial spots that have been airing since before the season even began. I just was left with the thought and feeling that this was a lackluster season at best. Combine this season ender with the Montana trip and I've come to the conclusion that the dismal ratings were definitely earned. I still won't quit this show but I have to see the hole in the emperor's clothes. I shudder to think how they plan to wring a 3 part reunion out of this season.

 

I started off liking and seeing potential in Kristen but her over the top reactions and facial expressions have come to bug me! Her getting the bird's eye seat next to Andy at the reunion is not making me happy. Her arm waving singing 'delusional' at Aviva made her look like one of those giant inflatable dancing tube men you see outside car dealerships.

 

Where they billing Carole's apartment as a renovation or redecorating? I didn't see any structural changes, no kitchen redo so it looked more cosmetic  tto me. Anyway, it looked good. I loved all the seating areas they created in the large living/great. That corner sofa with the butterfly coffee table was a great. I especially liked the entryway - it had kind of a sexy and masculine flair. The ceiling came out a lot better than I thought it would. When Carole was describing it, it kinda sounded like it would be tacky but it isn't. What terrificly high ceilings.

 

Color me shock that Andy seems to be the one that goes there about Ramona's marriage. If it were anyone other than Ramona I might feel like it was a bit of an intrusion since no part of her marital woes were featured on the show. However, she has dished out so much vitriol, some of which were unprovoked over the years that I think she deserves to swallow her dose of bad medicine. She has only gotten worse over the years. Her and Sonja's treatment of Luann this season has been downright mean and uncalled for. They took so many petty jabs at Luann for no reason. All that showed is that they were bitter and felt lacking. Frankly, I don't see how the Countess could sit and laugh at or with Ramona during WWHL. I would be seething from all the shit talking the did this season. 

[S09.E14: Fully Loaded]

Eddie may have simply been embarrassed, but he showed little concern or compassion toward her, only advising her that she needed to go to bed.  His indifference was a little uncomfortable to watch, but Tamra's histrionics were even more so.

 

Eddie was probably glad that they would be getting rid of one more useless thing at CUT Fitness that was costing them money. Frankly, they should keep him on and utilize their connection with their future daughter-in-law and have Ryan sell CUT Fitness memberships at gunpoint, which is what it is gonna take (for me anyway).

 

I don't believe for a minute that Sarah is 31. Nope! Not saying she is unattractive or anything but she has a very mature face. She seemed nice enough from the little we saw of her which begs the question - WTF does she see in Ryan? Also who the hell hooks up on instragram?

 

I laughed cringed throughout the entirety of Tamra so called breakdown. Seriously, at one point she didn't appear to have eyes at all. Just dark makeup encrusted slits. There is one point where Tamra is "so upset" that she goes to embrace her mom and the camera has her face in full frame -  gadzooks!  I wish I knew how to make gifs because boy does that need to be in heavy rotation. There is just so much ugly in those few seconds - ugly acting, ugly fake crying, ugly botox, ugly expression, ugly hair... it just goes on and on.

 

That therapy session?  I found myself feeling a tad bit more sympathetic towards her and than I remember that she is married to Ryan and it all kind of dissipates. I get from the session that she seems to be a pleaser. The question is whether she is that by nature or being raised by that narcissist Vicki turned her into one. I am sure it is a million times easier to just say yes to Vicki than try to argue a viewpoint that Vicki doesn't agree with.  She let Vicki direct all aspects of her life from what school to attend to what jobs she would take to where she would live. All that to say, that I really think she married Ryan out of the blue like she did out of rebellion.  She took the biggest decision of her life, ran off and did it without consulting anyone and presented it to Vicki as a fait accompli so Vicki really couldn't do a thing about it. That was a big fuck you to Vicki and I feel like she cut her nose to spite her face. Frankly, old girl would have done best just to run off and join Nurses without Borders or the Armed Forces than saddle herself with that rage filled thick hipped man. IMHO, Bri saw in Ryan someone who would help her battle her mother, have her back and stand as her centurion. It will be interesting to see how that relationship progresses after they move. 

 

Anyone notice how when Vicki mentioned that Ryan isn't perfect and has a temper Brianna immediately tries to shut that down by talking over Vicki.

 

I liked the sectional in Vicki's family room, although can't say I loved the color.

[S09.E14: Fully Loaded]

Tamra's reaction was fake as hell. This was probably old news to her and they decided to "reinact" it for the show. Everyone seemed so bemused and hardly able to contain their laughter. One sure clue that Tamra knows and had met that woman before is the fact that she made not one single comment about that woman's age. That woman is in her 40s without a doubt. Catty mean ass Tamra would have expressed 'concern' in her usual crude way about her son marrying a woman so much older than him. Lucky for the financee that the difference in age isn't too noticeable. Ryan looks like a damn 40 yr old his damn self.

One huge take away I got is that Ryan got himself a sugar mama. It was left unsaid but I have no doubts in my mind. Gun stores owners make some change. This is probably a family business that she inherited after both her parents passed. The cynical bitch in me thinks this is why Tamra doesn't have as many objections. The fact that she is also selling to the military and law enforcement - more cheddar in them pockets. I know Ryan isn't paying for a wedding and a wedding planner in Sacremento on his gym job salary. He is moving in with her and her kids in her house. Ryan proably barely has a pot to piss in.

The session with Brianna and Vicki was interesting and insightful.

Heather, Tamra and Danielle were like Cerberus, the 3 headed hound from hell at that luncheon discussing Shannon. How despicable! Painting Shannon with the brush of mental illness made the popcorn in my mouth turn to ash. What filthy digusting bitches. Tamra is so damn contradictory. On the one hand alluding that Shannon is an alcoholic because she drinks straight vodka and on the other proclaming that she frequently blacks out herself. WTF dummy!

Heather AGAIN mentions shannon yelling at her.

Tamra's talking head was some old back peddling shit. First she emphatically states she never said anything about the Terry taking the Beadors down. As the interview progresses she gets more and more wishy washy, finally admitting that she can't recall. Let me help her - heffa you know you said that shit!

[S01.E04: B.J. And The A.C.]

 

The pantsless man was speaking Greek and I think there was a better way to show he was crazy than to go walking around naked from the waist down.

Woah there. In my estimation, the gratuitous male nudity was the one good thing about this episode. May not have been pretty or even an unobstructed view but I think all shows need a little bit of peen. Women are always expected to get their tits out (Game of Thrones anyway) while the male unit is be shielded at all times. 

 

Put me down in the WTF did I just watch section of the bleachers. I have never watched Lost so I am not familiar with this Lindelof's work but I have heard many viewers weren't happy with the last few seasons of the show. Watching this series I can now see why. I love a good slow burn series but this ain't it. This all just seems so pointless and anticlimatic. I tuned in because it was an interesting premise and also because of the non-stop advertising. I was intrigued. I feel like the show runners squandered the 1st three episode. I can't find a single fuck to give about any of these characters and I actively hate the GR so much so that I am hoping all their cigarette smoking catches up with them.

 

When I realized the show was ending with a close up of that doll as baby Jesus I went into by DVR settings and deleted the series. This isn't even fun to hate watch. About half way through I just wanted to put on some steel toe re-enforced Doc Martens and kick everyone - EVERYONE!!! - in the groin. By the time we got to GR B&E into what appeared to be everyone's home I was just ready to break a baseball bat over all their heads and then send them a bill for the bat. I wish a mofo would break into my home and steal all my damn photos especially in light of the past tragedy where a photo maybe all you have left.  How can the whole town be at the dance? WTF is this Mayberry or the Simpsons Springfield?

 

I find the daughter and her friend insufferable. Well actually the daughter is more insufferable than the friend. 

 

As soon as the sheriff said he wasn't going to be running around looking for some doll, I knew he would be running around looking for some doll. Oh, and really smart to have the Chief of police in uniform going to the toy store around Christmas time to buy the exact same doll that went missing in the nativity scene. Brilliant. 

 

I find it odd that for the past two episodes that I can recall the audience doesn't get a preview of what will be appearing in the next episode but rather what is coming up for the entire series. That is just not a good sign to me.

[S09.E14: Fully Loaded]

I must again reiterate my admiration for Shannon's husband David. Not saying he is an angel, a great husband or not somehow at fault for whatever marital issues he and Shannon have. I just think in this particular situation he performed admirably and I would want my man to act the same if confronted with similar circumstances. I would say he is one of two househusbands that is able to get involved in the show, interject in an argument to defend his woman and not come across like a bitch made man trying to become a HW himself. The other man I think is Michael Ohoven from RHOBH who is married to that pageant chick. Is if fucked up that I can remember his name but not hers? At the other end of the spectrum are Peter of ATL, Slade and Miss Terry of this franchise. Even Brooks for all his smariness seems to stay in his lane.

Heather actually admitted to kicking Shannon out of her house so I hope that ends the semantics argument of whether being asked to leave is the same as being kicked out.

Heather's facial expressions throughout the entire preview just made me stabby. Her acting like she was on the verge of tears with Tamra was some WTFery.

I think Vicki is right Tamra is afraid of Heather or at least doesn't want to be on the wrong side of Heather. First, Tamra flat out admitted as much earlier in the season. Secondly, Tamra just seemed to be tap dancing as fast and hard as she could these last two episodes all in an attempt to pull focus off her own weasly ass. Tamra just seemed intent on not letting Shannon talk which indicates to me that Tamra didn't want any more truths coming out that night. Plus, she just was controlling the narrative and framing the arguments by dragging individuals out on the balcony. Worst of all she was the one that started all the mischaracterizations of Shannon's behavior. She immediately alluded that Shannon MUST be drunk in round 1 of pulling Heather aside and then later she was flat out saying that Shannon was having some kind of mental breakdown. She admitted to trying to restrain her like some kind of human straight jacket and made a motion like Shannon broke that 'restraint' like some kind of she-hulk. Can't say that Tamra doesn't think on her feet.

[S09.E14: Fully Loaded]

This is just the dinner party that just keeps giving and giving and giving. Love it! Some will disagree but on the list of Bravo dinner parties from hell, I would put this at #3. #1 being scary island and #2 BH e-cig disaster. It is just that good to me.

An ambulance bitches really? And I include Terry in with the bitches because he is. I really wanted to just smack all their smug faces, especially when Shannon re-entered the room. David got it so right, the room shut up quick when they came back in LOL! So glad they stuck to their guns as that piece of rotting roadkill Tamra trying to extend that shit by talking them into staying. I agree with whomever above said that shit like that is why Tamra will never be fired. She is a shit stirring MVP for production.

Funny watching Heather spin it to make her inability to give Shannon an inch as being Tamra's fault. Yet she still stands in solidarity with that weasel faced rat.

Heather just looked and acted telenovela like sinister these past 2 episodes.

Watching the replays of Tamra yelling in Shannon's face, grabbing her face and hands in order to calm her down would be comical if it wasn't so infuriating especially because Shannon was telling her to get the fuck away from her. That just reminds me of a Roseanne episode when Becky and Darlene are babysitting Crystal's baby. The baby is fussing and crying and Darlene takes a rattle and shakes it in the baby's face thinking it will calm him. Becky snatches the rattle out of Darlene's hand and shakes it in Darlene's face and asks "Does that calm you down you moron." I was so wishes that Shannon would have grabbed Tamra's face screamed in it and asked the same question.

Kudoz to Lizzie's husband. Firstly, for shutting down that dumb ass ambulance talk and secondly for calling Heather out on making the toast about herself.

Still can't help digging Vicki

[S06.E09: There's Something About Harry]

Sonja needs to stop spending money on charlatans. In her blog she referenced about 3 that she frequents. Isn't this chick in frigging bankruptcy? Why is she wasting money on this? Yet her townhouse is falling down around her ears as she segregates her panties by vacay destinations. Did any of these people foresee Old Man Morgan leaving her ass? Did they forsee her ass de-frauding people and going broke?

 

That ring Harry gave to Sonja just left me wondering if Harry found it in a crackerjack box or did he send away for it after he had collected a certain amount of box tops. WTF!?!

 

Eboost is a drink?!? Shows how much I was paying attention. I thought it was some kind of website or tech product. Color me surprised.

 

The party was nice but the episode was a snooze. I feel like I am watching this show more out of habit than actual enjoyment. During the past few episodes I keep reaching for either my phone or my tablet. - a sure sign of my boredom. I can see and understand why the ratings are down. Usually the 1st seasons of all the HWs show tend to be the best, with the exception of Miami. YMMV. So I don't need manufactured drama.  I think what is missing is the 'real' and the lives of the wives.

 

The NY group, with the exception of Kristin, have gotten down to a science the art of compartmentalizing their lives and deciding what they will and won't show us. They all refuse to show us any ugly, unpleasant or embarrassing parts of their lives. The Countess was the pioneer of this and the rest have followed in her footsteps. The fact that Mario's cheating was kept off the show just goes to highlight this. Heather did give us a sliver when she went into some of the medical issue of her son Jax. However, I was left wondering how real that was because it was later revealed that they opted not to go through with it. Seriously, I feel like I know very little about Heather aside from her son being sick and that she owns yummy tummy. I can't even recall what the inside of her apartment looks like. So with all this compartmentalization we are left with nonsensical event after nonsensical event and manufactured drama.

 

I don't mind the trips, but this last one to Montana was the worst trip out of every franchise I ever had to suffer through.

 

 

Aviva and Shannon from the OC remind me of each other. I think both probably have some legitimate medical issues regarding anxiety and stress. I also think both are spoiled little rich girls who have never had to "just deal" in their entire lives. So treatable issues take over because neither one of them has ever been in a do or die circumstance about managing their issues.

 

Shannon's issues don't stop her from showing up to work though.  Shannon hasn't missed an event as far as I can tell and she was/is able to board a plan and go places without making a huge production about it and expecting banners. Aviva seems a slave to her issues. I think whatever Aviva's phobia's are more severe and life limiting than Shannon's. Shannon maybe trying to address her issues with that charlatan Dr. Moon but all I see Aviva doing is going to doctors to get diagnoses and notes to excuse her out of things. 

[S01.E07: I've Been to London to Visit the Queen]

That's why I found her face so familiar! I loved Ladette to Lady; the show's run was way too short (I think it was just two short seasons?).

There were actually 3 seasons of the show but I think only the 1st two ever aired on US television as far as I know. I myself never saw the 3rd season. It might be available online somewhere but I never checked. I only just learned of a 3rd season not too long ago myself. 

[S01.E07: I've Been to London to Visit the Queen]

I literally squealed when I saw Rosemary Schrager. I loved her ass on that trashy as Ladyette to Lady British reality show. 

 

Noelle has what I have come to term perma selfie face. It appears her default facial expression is what one sees in posted selfie pics of your standard basic instragrams hoes - pouty provocative, you know you wanna fuck me expression with a head tilt. She always seems to be posing for a picture that isn't being taken. Miss I ain't no golddigger was trying to point out the 300 acre estate that Scot with one 't' owned before he relocated all his ass ... oops went bankrupt. Of course she said once again she met him at the wrong time. Yeah, she is with him for his looks and charm.

 

Juliet actually looked nice in some of her talking heads and also to go to the Wellington Club. 

 

I think I have heard the worse advice I have ever heard given on any reality show. Next in line open face dry turkey Sandwich told Caprice CAPRICE! to be selfish. Why not go tell the Atlantic Ocean to be wet & salty. Caprice is just horrid.  Funny that she asks all these girls to throw her a party and always spins it as them offering. Come to turn out she is leaving for the states anyway and there won't be a party.Her fiance already has 3 kids? Where are they? What does he do? Hope he supports them. 

 

Wow! Who knew it would take broken bones and internal injuries to make Annabelle likeable. 

 

I like Caroline but she is a ridiculously catty bitch. Also, how much different were the shorts she wore this episode compared to the ones Juliet wore to the 4th of July party?

 

Can't believe the season is over next week. Feel like it just started.

[S09.E13: Point 'Break']

 

Andy was throwing major shade at Tamra on WWHL. "Gossip is spreading like chlamydia in the OC and some think Tamra is patient zero." Tams: "Being a troublemaker is my job." Andy: "Well, actually, your job is to be yourself."

 

I would take this more seriously if this was the 1st time Tamra ever uttered this statement and the 1st time Andy heard it. It is most definitely NOT! Tamra said basically the same thing at the end of last season both on line and in Andy's presence. I remember it distinctly because I had the same thoughts every other brilliant person in this thread had - that she was breaking the 4th wall and actively admitting to be a production shill. I think the problem this time is that Tamra might have gone rogue and isn't working with production on her undercover shit stirring but doing shit on her own to create drama. Probably won't get her fired but doesn't make production happy which will get editing to cut and paste on your ass and drop in scenes to show you are a scuzzy lying liar who lies. teehee. 

 

Would have loved to have been a fly on the wall when Heather heard Shannon's 'the face he created' snap. Judging by Terry's reviews - probably not. Heather can still close her eyes. Ooops maybe not. It is hard to tell if she can even blink. I hope Heather kept the receipt. I just know Heather will be demanding an apology at the reunion for that one. Yet I have little doubt that Heather will see her damn near alluding  that Shannon was having a mental break or questioning whether she was smoking crack was little more than a joke not to be taken seriously and Shannon should lighten up! 

 

Another annoying thing about Heather is that once she gets going she won't let another person fucking get a word in edgewise. Infuriating! 

 

I really liked Lizzie because she was astute enough to see the machinations of Tamra. For how smart the DuBrows love to think themselves are I was really shocked about how obtuse and stuck on stupid they were.

 

Tamra is lying about saying she never said that take the Beadors down thing to Shannon. The only question for me is whether the Dubrows actually said it. I don't believe they said that in so many words. However I think Tamra had discussions with them and maybe interpreted with her reptilian yet ratlike mental process some of their private comments about the Beadors as such.  I feel for whatever reason the DuBrows do feel competitive with the Beadors. Shannon being so easily enfolded and welcomed by the group probably amped up those feelings. I think the DuBrows wanted to be the unchallenged, undisputed rich moneyed muckity mucks who the other couples held in the highest of esteem. The Beadors seem like they could give a shit. Hell, David seems like he would rather be living in a home like Vicki or Eddie than what he has now and Shannon is too to the manner born feeling the pea under her mattress and the crystals in her walls to be playing keeping up with the DuBrows. 

 

Like others have observed this isn't the way Tamra acts when she feels to be in the right. Tamra just isn't her normal screeching, yelling, profanity spewing rabid bit of roadkill that just won't stay dead in this situation. So yeah, bitch lying.

 

Lizzie's husband was nice at the dinner but his clothing choices annoyed me. Everyone was dressed for a nice dinner and he looked like he was on his way to a tailgate. 

[S09.E13: Point 'Break']

What an underprivileged youth I had. How old is Shannon's daughter? She must be in middle school yet her latin class is taking a trip to frigging Italy. Jezz!

 

I've think I have broken the code on why Heather thinks Shannon is always yelling at her. I sincerely believe that anyone who doesn't cow-tow, defer or dares to disagree with Heather and refuses to capitulate after Heather throws around a few $10 words accompanied by finger wags is yelling at her. 

 

Does Heather blink? I feel like her eyes are always on high beam setting. Always!! How Heather can sit there are still say Tamra is not a liar after the X-Mas party. Wasn't there a confrontation over Tamra making the statement that Heather told her[Tamra]  to pick a side? Tamra actually stood by that statement and Heather was a bit cagey about it with her 'really, I told you to pick a side' while deeply staring into Tamra's eyes like she was trying to glammer her like some kind of vampire. 

 

You know, Shannon might not be good at confrontation and comes across as delicate and not built for this show, but I give her credit for standing her ground. She did more than Vicky and Tamra in their half-assed Heather is an elitist bore non-takedown that ended before it started. Both Vicky and Tamra admitted to being afraid of Heather. Tamra was downright cowed and timid with Heather in their restaurant scene. When has Tamra ever been that? Shannon may not have the constitution for confrontation like a Nene or Tamra but I can give props for her "I am not the one!" shaky voiced defense of herself. 

 

Hearing that Tamra is getting eviscerated on twitter is making my heart sing. It almost makes me want to get a twitter account. Almost. LOL!

 

All the talk of Tamra being thrown from the balcony made me think of that video of a man throwing a raccoon off a balcony that had just attacked his dog. 

http://www.businessinsider.com/kevin-rose-raccoon-throwing-gif-2013-7

It is the eyes glowing in the dark as it descends seemingly into a black bottomless abyss that get me every time. 

 

They showed pics of Lizzie as a younger girl and I really now think that that is just her face. She really doesn't look all that different except now her face just seems leaner and more angular which gives her a harsher look. I don't believe she has had any invasive surgery. Just maybe fillers, botox and unfortunate eyebrow shaping choices. 

 

So was the beach home renovated before the dinner party or just cleaned up a bit? It had great views.

[S09.E13: Point 'Break']

That was utterly delicious! It is almost shameful how I utterly enjoyed ever morsel of every scene of that mess. The cast formula is just right! Now down to brass tacks:

- Tamra is satan's 50 cent concubine! Scratch that! Even the devil wouldn't debase himself to lay with that festering pile of pus and have to do a walk of shame up Hades Blvd! What a souless, disgusting POS she is. I just would run out of nasty adjectives trying to describe how truly heinous and repulsive I find her. I keeping thinking of that old Dave Chappelle sketch where one of his characters says "I want bad things to happen to you and only you." That is where I am at with Tamra. I felt damn near stabby when Tamra was on the balconey trying to spin her shit. I was seeing red when she even said Shannon was drunk. Her face is steadily transforming into Killface from Frisky Dingo.

- God bless Bravo editing and their use of the flashbacks. They were dragging Tamra for filth through cacti, brambles, thorns and thickets! Tore her ass the hell up. I fucking loved, loved when Heather said that Tamra didn't lie and we get the Rick James edit of her saying she never told Heather anything followed by admitting that yeah, she told Heather that shit.

- Fuck Queen Terry and his remanufactured wife! What a couple of braying jackasses. Heather is like a damn dog (pedigree with papers of course, not one of those rescue mutts) with a bone from Whole Foods about being fucking yelled at. Is that the biggest fucking crime ever committed against her. STFU whoville. Damn! She won't let that shit go. Shannon has apologized for that twice and still it ain't enough! Heather won't even admit she did wrong for gossiping about Shannon's marriage. Instead, she seems to want to paint herself as some kind of hero for 'shutting down a conversation about the Beador marriage.' Shit, if ididn't know any better she almost seemed like she wanted a thanks for that shit. Seriously! Bitch please. I don't believe you. She doesn't like Shannon and I have no doubt in my mind that the gossip was said with malice intent.

- I thought David handled himself quite well. Good for him for not allowing Terry to speak to him or his wife any kind of way.

- Oh Shannon she is delicate for this show but still I am on her side completely. I feel like Heather is gassing her and I wish Shannon wouldn't fall for the bait but I get it. It can be frustrating to be on the end of what she is getting from Heather. It reminds me of situations that I have been in where just because I was a black woman with an opinion and stately it calmly and succintly, somehow I was yelling or being aggressive or a man telling me to calm down when I wasn't even turnt up to begin with. UGH! Heather is attempting to control the narrative and both of their characterizations by painting Shannon this way. So I felt pressed and pissed on Shannon's behalf.

Still amazed by Vicki being my choice for MVP this season. Aside from that 200 lb canker sore she keeps bringing with her everywhere and her now standard narcissim I am really digging her this season. However, I was feeling a bit angry with Vicki for not speaking up at the dinner but thinking about it a little I think Vicki might be playing the long game. She was right piping up then and there would have done nothing but put a target on her and Brooks (who was fuckings digusting with the vagina comment) and given Tamra an opportunity to deflect the issue and change the conversation - Tamra is very good at that. Keeping silent gave Tamra's treachery a true chance to shine. Pulling folks out onto the patio to spin her web of bullshit lies and being a disgusting stalker who wouldn't leave when Shannon alone after being asked several times to get the hell away from her. All her rat weasly ways were on full display. Vicki nailed her ass dead to rights in the TH after the fact while giving Tamra the rest of the season to show her ass. I am just gonna see this as Vicki giving Tamra rope. We see how more heinous Tamra gets next episode by being an even bigger gossipy piece of shit.

Lizzie is redeeming herself.

[S06.E18: Something To Sing About]

The scenes at Birdland-Luann sang but she chose a song that could not be aired. 

 

In other words, Bravo was too cheap to pay the licensing/copyright fees to air the song. Cheap bastards. There was a reason Mario sang a song written by "Ramona's gay husband." Bravo either didn't have to pay or they paid a nominal fee.  There is also a reason Heather sang Camptown Races. It is a song in the public domain and anyone can sing it and no fees are owing to anyone. Sidenote, that is also the reason you hear a lot of HW singing Amazing Grace (looking at you Melissa Gorga) and other really old songs. I think the one exception maybe RHOBH which sometimes plays David Foster tunes which is because David Foster makes appearances and brings artists on the show. Bravo might get a discount or something. LOL!

 

I always hate when the wives go to a club or party and you hear this weirdo electronic background music that no club in their right mind would ever play. That is just Bravo dropping in some cheap music so they don't have to pay for whatever song the club is playing which is likely to be a hot track like Rhianna or Beyonce. Again, cheap bastards!

 

Surprised that the women were unfamiliar with Birdland.  I can understand that they haven't been there, but not to have heard of it?  I'm from Iowa and I don't even like jazz, but I've heard of Birdland.  Assuming it's the same place -- 52nd & Broadway? -- opened in the early 50's (I think) and named for Charlie "Bird" Parker (saxophone).  Clint Eastwood made a movie about him, and Forest Whitaker won an Oscar as Bird.

 

 

 

There is also a song called "Lullaby of Birdland" It has been performed by several famous artist but I think Ella Fitzgerald is the version I am most familiar with and maybe the most popular.

[S09.E12: La-Bomb-A]

 

Here is the story of the casting of Lizzie and Shannon.  http://www.ocregiste...ie-shannon.html

Oh goodness, the OC register. You done took me back. That place was popping around the time of Lauri's engagement and subsequent marriage to the chinless wallet. There was so much amazing gossip about that relationship and Lauri's troubled son coming allegedly from George's ex-wife and ex-mother-in-law. In fact, it made its way onto TWOP and that thread was shut down for quite sometime. It was rumored that George was threatening a lawsuit. Those were the days. Lauri going on and on about her happy Brady Brunch family, complaining about never having had a proper honeymoon (to this day) while Josh went in and out of various penal institutions and went to live with George's ex-wife. 

 

I would never be as rude to Lizzie as Vicki was but this episode I finally came to the conclusion that yes, that it is a pretty stupid name. The swimsuit store owner or manager or whatever had some pretty canned answers and didn't exactly seem enthused about what she was seeing. The more Lizzie discusses her business the less impressive it becomes. She got $100k from her dad to startup? But of course she is doing it on her own. There aren't enough eye rolls in the world. 

[S06.E18: Something To Sing About]

When both parties in a marriage make it sound like going to a therapist is like going to court for a ruling on who is at fault, your marriage is in serious, serious trouble.

 

I am not going to get caught up in the details of their argument. I feel the fight was the symptom of their much larger issues. To quote Bethanny: it is not about what it was about. Josh doesn't respect or honor his wife, Kristen. To him, she seems like barely an afterthought in his life. Kristen is immature, a nag and suffers from chronic dog with a boneitis. However, I feel like Kristen would actually listen to a therapist and put in the effort. Josh? Not so much. However, I hope he does. I just think the douche is strong in that one.

 

I want to smack the shit out of Josh every time he goes on about Kristen not knowing anything about the business world. The thing is that I don't think he would have married her if she was on "his level" professionally. He strikes me as that bitch!  He doesn't want someone on his level. He wanted & married arm candy. He would have never married a Heather type because he couldn't stand the challenge or competition. I feel like he has read and is now living by the rules set by those dating guru jackholes that require that you put down women in order to keep them. Why else complain both when dinner isn't and is on the table? I have no idea what Kristen saw in him? He damn sure ain't good looking. He isn't rich. Comfortable maybe, but not rich. He doesn't seem charming either so must've been love.

 

Ramona contains to be the worst. Mario is an asshole for cheating on her but I don't for a minute feel sorry for Ramona. She has taken too much joy in other's people misery and has been running roughshod over everyone's feelings. The fates finally caught up with her ass.

 

Wasn't nobody really thinking about Aviva until Ramona brought her simple ass up at dinner. Also, they only talked about her for a hot minute so STFU Sonja. Shit like that only serves to gas her head up and incite her special brand of crazy. Aviva has been looking like shit lately. I really want to know where she is getting her Old Spinster Schoolmarm on the Prairie dresses so I can avoid shopping there. Plus, Sonja made light of her illness to. When Sonja wanted to stay in bed and not go glamping she make the joke to tell the girls she had asthma. 

 

Sonja was really gross and disgusting at the plastic surgeon's office with her sexual exploits. So inappropriate. That doctor was unprofessional and extremely rude, but most of all she was money grubbing.  Many years ago I was looking into getting one and only one cosmetic procedure done. I did a lot of research and interviewed a lot of patients and doctor's. One of the key pieces of advise I got was from one patient was that if you go for a consult and the doctor, unsolicited, starts randomly pointing out other procedures you need and should have - RUN. Run hard, run deep, and run far, but the operative word is RUN!!! Such a doctor is only thinking about lining their pockets and not their patients. 

 

Nobody was a great singer at Birdland. However, I have to give it to Heather. It wasn't her voice I was impressed. She exuded confidence, looked comfortable on stage (danced a little bit, moved around), was engaging and most importantly seemed to have a really good time. Dare I say she had stage presence. Get it girl!

 

I didn't understand Mario with his closed eyes. Did he think his ass was channeling Andrea Bocelli? Still I give him props for getting up there and not completely stinking up the place.

 

Harry with that chicken wing looked like a starved chicken hawk that hadn't had a meal in months. That needs to be a gif in my life.

[S09.E12: La-Bomb-A]

 

And they want $149 a month for that tatty studio? Looking at the website, the pricing is $149 for a 30-day unlimited membership, but if you auto-renew on a contract, it's $125 a month, but you are stuck with cancellation charges if you want to bail on it. That's probably standard for gym memberships. I remember reading somewhere that the large gym chains (LA Fitness, Fitness First, etc.) make more money from people who sign a 1-year contract in January and then never show up after the first week than they do from people who use the gym all year round.

How checked out am I during the Tamra/Eddie scene that I didn't realize that the $149 figure was for a monthly membership fee? I thought this might have been some kind of 2 or 3 month promo fee. Who would pay that much for that rinky dinky place? Again not paying much attention but it seems like a small gym with limited hours, not a lot of equipment and focuses a lot on classes, which again might not be a fit for people with a tough schedule. Aren't they in a corporate park? 

[S09.E13: Point 'Break']

Looks like next week kicks off the Bali episodes. Saw a preview of Shannon talking normally to Heather and Heather telling her to stop yelling at her, which is when Shannon loses her shit. LOL! Oh Heather you are a card. We also seem to get a Beador/Dubrow showdown where Terry will use his medical training & acumen to call David a penis. Fix it Jesus!

 

Barefoot shrieking Tamra must be on the horizon. Yippeee!!!! My guess is that like NYC, they will squeeze by hook or crook 3 episodes out of this trip. My money is on OC being far more entertaining. 

[S09.E12: La-Bomb-A]

Mexico again saved this episode from being a 5 alarm snoozer.

 

I feel bad for Shannon because it seems like her emotions are so out of control but she can't reign it in. Even if she knows deep down that she should stop.

 

This here is why I never was on board with the comparisons between Shannon and Heather. Just because they both try to direct a X-Mas family picture doesn't mean they are just alike or the same person. Shannon is an emotional ball of emotions. She is raw and unfiltered. Heather is very controlled, aware and is all about appearances - Hyacinth Bucket (pronounced Bouquet). Heather would rather slit her own throat than divulge that her husband doesn't sleep in the same bed with her or that she isn't loved and adored unconditionally by Terry.

 

Chiming in with all the comments on how raw the scenes between David and Shannon have been. Just damn. This it the HWs of yesteryear.  I am almost ashamed to admit that I watch their scene a few times because it was riveting. Yet I also feel bad about that. I feel like a dragon feasting on the ashes of their failing marriage. Yeah, I am also going through Games of Thrones withdrawal. Don't judge me. LOL! I digress. I am still left with a burning desire to know what sin needs to be forgiven.

 

My  thoughts on what happened? Shit went down probably cheating by David. Shannon lost her shit; confrontation ensued; domestic altercation followed soon thereafter; forgiveness was given lip service but never actually granted and they have each been exacting punishment by whittling each other down to a nub ever since in their own unique ways. The woman David cheating with was probably a looker with silicone tits of steel which maybe why she is extra sensitive about David commenting and wanting her to get a boob job. At the end of the day (tm Apollo), this all just feels like the patented love each other but not in love scenario to me. I feel like David was right about Shannon not be happy and need to find her own happy but it wasn't apparent that David saw a future with Shannon, happy or otherwise. 

 

Seriously, the man comes home after a day in construction and helps prepare dinner for his daughters? Did I hear that right? David take me here. Take me now! This is unheard of in HW history. Why isn't this seen as spending time together? I really want to know what Shannon expects. Marriage is about 90% (being generous) routine and boredom. Don't expect McMillan and Wife or to be going around in a van solving mysteries having adventures.  It always sounds like she wants David to do all the heavy lifting and she just stands around like an ivory statue being worshipped. 

 

Side note (a vain one), David has a glorious head of hair. I found it mesmerizing at the lunch with Shannon. All wavy with just the perfect salt to pepper ratio.

 

Shannon doing her stiff shoulder shimmy on top of the bar was my everything. She is a 87 year in a 48 years old's body.

 

Everyone once in a while Terry does something that just makes me love his drama queen ass. Putting Heather's ass on front scene at dinner was one of those such times. Her ass was fuming that Terry called her out on camera about that shit. Loved it!  I know Terry got the business when he got home. Seriously, Heather just should've got her dogs and not justified going with a pedigreed pouch to the audience. Again, keeping up appearances.  This kills me because this is the same type of shit she would've called out Alexis about.  Heather, if everybody says you're dead lay down. The worst is that it kinda reminded me of Taylor of RHOBH and her whole pedigree/allergy situation. Ugh!

 

After watching Tamra and Eddie with Robo-baby, I have to serious question the producers for not showing some of 'friend of' housewives Danielle's personal life.  It can't be any more boring then Tamra's day to day stuff.

 

For reals. But to be honest, I would be in that mostly for Danielle's husband. I would 100% prefer to watch Danielle's husband be hetero with his wife, who is a woman.  Let me stop.

 

Anyone else think that when Eddie was asking Ryan what other useless thing they could get rid of to cut costs he was thinking of Ryan? Just me? I just smelled the shade like I was watching smell-o-vision. 

 

Eddie seems about as checked out as David Beador. Not a good sign after less than a year of marriage.

[Unpopular Opinions: "The Post-Lotto Episodes Were the Best!"]

I feel like the show jumped the shark way before the Conners won the lottery. I feel like it jumped around the time Darlene went off to college. There may be a few good episodes here or there but I thought it was mostly crap.

 

Aside from the episodes that set up Roseanne and partners being restaurant owners, I didn't like the lunchbox. 

 

I always wanted to bitch slap Crystal when she got to complaining on what an absentee husband and father Ed was. Um, everyone, especially, Dan told your ass this before you got married. So shut it!

 

I loved Beverly. 

 

Hated Jackie's baby daddy.

 

Sarah Gilbert's acting got really bad the last couple of seasons. That deadpan delivery worked as a child but as an adult? Not so much. Especially when she supposedly softened up a bit and embraced love, marriage and parenthood. 

 

Dan was a total cuties!

[S06.E17: Bury the Hatchet]

Kristen really got on my nerves this episode. If I was every unsure of how and why her and Brandi every came to be such good friends I ain't now. NO Kristen is not a drunk, doesn't have pap pics floating around with a tampon string hanging out of her vag and isn't as sexually inappropriate but something must bind them together. They both have the gene for drama escalation and going low in an argument by bringing up extraneous shit that doesn't have anything to do with the topic at hand. Kristen should have kept Heather's marriage and husband out of her mouth. Being a boss at work and one in your private life has 2 different connotations. The first is positive, the second  has a potential to be negative. My apologies to the feminists here but a woman being a boss in a relationship just isn't generally seen as a positive and viewed as a mark against their partner. Kristen seemed to be calling Heather's man a punk bitch, which seems to be what Heather was concerned with.

 

Heather wasn't a victim and she has been behaving like a bit of an asshole but I didn't blame her for being mega upset about Kristen bringing her husband into this. Kristen apology was a non-apology. She basically said that she was sorry Heather was upset with being called bossy. Heather I think realized that and decided to be the bigger person and just accept it because it wasn't going to get any better than that.

 

Ramona was ridiculous and had way too much to say about a man she can barely remember. At least Heather never has to wonder if Jonathan has shagged any of the chicks at the party he just swaggered into. I am really wondering and hoping that someone, anyone has the balls to throw Mario's infidelity into her Pinot marinated face at the reunion. She has been so inappropriate and so over reaching for so many seasons that I don't believe she should be given the courtesy of privacy. I doubt very much it would be the Countess, even though Ramona has disrespected her on so many occassions. The Countess just would never. I see it likely to be either Kristen &Heather. Too bad Ramona is cool with Aviva because if they were on the outs I would have no doubt it would be her.

 

Luanne looked great at the rodeo. I loved everything she had on from her hat to her suede fringed pants.

 

Did anyone catch what Heather said in the stands at the rodeo after Luanne and Kristen went off to the bathroom? She said something about how Kristen has a nanny sleep over and then doesn't get up with the kids. I don't even know what the significance of that is supposed to be and what import it had on what was going on between them.

 

Something that tickled me beyond measure? For some reason Sonja at the final evening event saying "Hi boys!" and giving her patented lip pout just had me busting the hell out.