Ideas for Ree's Shows

[Lura]

While many of us find problems with Ree herself, the fact remains that she has one of the few actual "cooking" shows on the Food Network.  If you could improve "Pioneer Woman" in the areas of cooking or plot ideas, this is the place to make your voice heard.  We'll leave Ree's personality/quirks out of here and concentrate on what she is/isn't cooking or showing us that would make the show more enjoyable for you.  If you have a complaint, that's OK, but what is a possible solution?

[Lura]

I'll take the easy way out and go first!  :)  I become annoyed and bored by all of the Mexican food on Ree's shows and the Mexican "twists" she adds to make other dishes "Mexican."  I love some Mexican food, but I'm not interested in eating or cooking with those flavors nearly as much as she does.  I'd like to see something German like wiener schnitzel (easy to make) or sauerbraten with spaetzel (also easy) or just good, everyday American dishes.  Anything but Mexican for a change!

Edited August 27, 2017 by Lura
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[anneofcleves]

Great idea.  Here's one, inspired by her show today:  Desperation Dinners with Steak

Description:  Ree's about at her wits end, what with running things at the Merc and trying to keep Ladd away from all the luscious sticky buns that the womenfolk keep shoving in his face.  So she's trying to lure him back with some of her favorite, yet speedy, 16 minute steak dinners.  Watch with amazement as she makes Sloppy Rancheros out of one of those extra filet mignons she has laying around in the freezer.  Then she moves on to Steak 'n Tuna Casser-OLE', where she cleverly and deliciously uses up a 14 pound standing rib roast, a pesky four pound slab of sashimi grade tuna (who can ever figure out what to do with this stuff?), and luscious cream of mushroom enchilada sauce to jazz up one of Ladd's childhood favorites!  Finally, it's sweet and cheesy maple-sesame Kobe beef sticks with pepper jack cheese, all luxuriously wrapped in Ree's favorite ingredient (puffed pastry!), rolled in pecans, and baked to mouth-watering perfection.  So join Ree on her frontier and see how you can turn even the toughest ingredients into the most amazing and decadent meal for that rancher of yours!  She guarantees he won't be seeking out anyone  else's sticky buns ever again!

[Lura]

LOVE IT, Anne!  I'm all ready to eat!  Despite the Mexican twist, I think I'd like that casser-OLE' you dreamed up!  LOL  Does that call for pepper jack cheese, by any chance?  I know how easily she says it melts.  What a way to ruin a fil-OLE'!

Edited August 29, 2017 by Lura

[grisgris]

I want for Ree to be a contestant on "Chopped." The mystery basket theme for the evening is raw vegan. That means there will be NONE of the following available in the pantry: Any type of animal protein, dairy, sugar, white flour products, candy or processed/canned foods. No cast iron skillets. No waffle irons. Have I left anything out? (Would sriracha be eligible?)

I know Ree claims she used to be a vegetarian, but I am thinking she was the kind who cheerfully loaded up her salads, pastas, veggies, etc., with plenty of fatty dressing, cheese, butter and cream sauces.

[anneofcleves]

4 minutes ago, grisgris said:

I want for Ree to be a contestant on "Chopped." The mystery basket theme for the evening is raw vegan. That means there will be NONE of the following available in the pantry: Any type of animal protein, dairy, sugar, white flour products, candy or processed/canned foods. No cast iron skillets. No waffle irons. Have I left anything out? (Would sriracha be eligible?)

I know Ree claims she used to be a vegetarian, but I am thinking she was the kind who cheerfully loaded up her salads, pastas, veggies, etc., with plenty of fatty dressing, cheese, butter and cream sauces.

Lol.  That would be so funny.  I suspect you're right and think of Ree as being one of those "Mountain Dew and French Fries" kind of vegetarian.  Not a clue about nutrition and little concern about where the food comes from.  If it has no meat, it's healthy!

[grisgris]

Gotta make sure, though, that it's a diet Mountain Dew! ;-0

[chessiegal]

My suggestion is that she spare us all the pain of an unwatchable, useless show and quit. Replace with someone who actually knows how to cook and can teach us something.

[anneofcleves]

7 hours ago, chessiegal said:

My suggestion is that she spare us all the pain of an unwatchable, useless show and quit. Replace with someone who actually knows how to cook and can teach us something.

But then we wouldn't be able to dream up absurd cooking shows.  Come on, Chessiegal, you know you've got one or two in you.  

[Lura]

grisgris, m'friend, NO!  I hate to tell you, but yesterday's front page news contained the announcement that diet sodas cause cancer.  The story didn't state whether aspertane (sp?) is the definitive cause, but it did warn against consuming any diet soda.

I can't live with any more sweet treats.  Ree is filling those kids full of sugar, and I suspect the reason is because she can't get enough sugar to satisfy her own cravings.  I want a show with No. More. Candy and with dessert only after dinner, NOT THREE TIMES A DAY!  Out with the gummy worms, the Sprinkles, the chocolate in its many forms, the sodas, and especially the infernal bark containing every candy in the supermarket aisle!  Dessert should emphasize fruit desserts such as strawberry shortcake, peach cobbler, etc.  Chocolate candy and desserts will be limited to birthdays and Christmas.The use of corn syrup in these desserts is strictly forbidden since it has been proven to cause cravings for more sugar.  I do NOT understand Ree and Ladd paying all the money it requires on braces for all the kids, meanwhile filling their teeth full of sugar, just asking for decay.  To me, Ree and Ladd are stupid and careless parents who need monitoring closer than their kids do!  Careless because they know better but "move forward" ( a saying I'm tired of) down the chocolate and candy path anyway.

Edited August 29, 2017 by Lura

[peacheslatour]

Sing it Sister! And while we're at it; no more Cake Boss, Cupcake Wars and all the rest of the shows that glorify sugar and waste. So much waste. 

[Lura]

13 hours ago, peacheslatour said:

Sing it Sister! And while we're at it; no more Cake Boss, Cupcake Wars and all the rest of the shows that glorify sugar and waste. So much waste. 

Amen, Hallelujah, and all that!  I wonder how much waste there actually is.  It's a coincidence that only last week I read that most of the food prepared on the FN is eaten by the crews.  That's fine by me, but if there are shows that are pitching their food into the trash, that's so wrong.  So many people need it.

[chessiegal]

I saw a "behind the scenes" show on Iron Chef, and they showed drivers donating the leftover products not used by the chefs to Food Banks or other places. One can only hope that philosophy continues.

[txvoodoo]

On 8/27/2017 at 7:22 PM, grisgris said:

I want for Ree to be a contestant on "Chopped."

I think she should be a contestant on every damned FN competition when they have FN celebs on them, just so we can watch her be humiliated. Chopped, Cutthroat Kitchen, Next Iron Chef, Guy's Grocery Games, you name it.

I'd especially like to see her beat down by Alex G or Amanda F.

[grisgris]

But ... she's already  beaten Bobby Flay once ...

I'd throw her right into the fire as a competitor on "Iron Chef." I wish IC would do another of those tag team holiday specials. I'd team her up with Geoffrey Zakarian. Then have them go up again Bobby and Michael Simon or Alex and Anne. Enough said.

I'd pay good money to see that.

[Lura]

What a fantastic idea, grisgris!  

I would like to see no more "guest children" on the show.  By that I mean friends of the kids.  We already see the Drummond Four in nearly every episode, and often their two cousins are added to the mix.  That's enough kids for me.

What brings on this suggestion is a show that we saw last night.  Paige had four or five girlfriends over for a sleepover.  REE was the star!  The girls had their own activities until Ree took over, and she had them gather in the kitchen so she could teach them the art of making cookies by cutting the dough around their hands, then decorating them.  Ree was in her glory, talking about how her mother used to let Ree make cookies like that.  She went on and on and on about how to do it, how clever the cookies were, and even said the next lesson would be about the art of decorating.  The girls were into it at first, but the enthusiasm waned.  That took up most of the show.  I felt that Ree was intruding on their day, that she wanted them to go home raving about how clever Paige's mother was, and Ree was never more in her element.  To prevent any more shows like it (and there have been others), I'd like this show to be the end of them.  Let Ree do a dance in the buff down Main St. if she's that desperate for attention.

Edited September 1, 2017 by Lura

[film noire]

I'd like to see "My Fair Pioneer Lady":  Every week, Alton Brown takes Ree through her own kitchen, explaining and drilling her on what each ingredient, tool and cooking method does, using music as a teaching tool  ("And once again, from where is this grain? Arroz from Spain! Arroz from Spain!") After 44 episodes, the finale sends Ree to the elite Bocuse d'Or cooking competition,  to see if she can pass herself off as one of the bon ton of chefdom.  Will she fail? ("Just you wait,  Alton Brown-y,  just you wait!") or succeed? ("I could have spread my chicken wings, and dredged a thousand things, I'd never dredged before!") 

No?:)

How about Ree cooking her way through old school techniques - exploring (and explaining)  fermenting, canning, salting, jellies, jams, pickling, butchering, putting aside provisions, etc, but with a modern day edge.  She shows no real cooking skills or knowledge on her show, and she's uncomfortable and uncharismatic in front of the camera, so it's dull as dishwater. Maybe if she tackled something with structure -- a skill she had to learn -  it might goose her into beingmore alive and interesting. Connect it to the history of the region ( "The blizzard of 1856 around here was a bad one, and ranching families like Ladd's barely made it through the winter. One of the things that women used to do back in the day was..." etc, etc). 

Edited September 1, 2017 by film noire

[Lura]

Quote

7 hours ago, film noire said:

("And once again, from where is this grain? Arroz from Spain! Arroz from Spain!")

 

"I could have cooked all night!  I could have cooked all night and still have cooked some more!  I could have breaded my wings and done a thousand things I'd never done before!"

You, film noire, are a genius!  I think you should start a blog tomorrow, and this should be your opening piece!  Your blog would be an instant hit.  You'd have your own show, and -- my, oh my -- would you ever cook!  You could sing and cook!  This is honestly so clever that I wish I could give it one hundred "likes."  Amazing, and so much fun!  :)  :)  :)  I'm going to be humming songs from "My Fair Lady" for a week!  LOL

[film noire]

49 minutes ago, Lura said:

"I could have cooked all night!  I could have cooked all night and still have cooked some more!  I could have breaded my wings and done a thousand things I'd never done before!"

You, film noire, are a genius!  I think you should start a blog tomorrow, and this should be your opening piece!  Your blog would be an instant hit.  You'd have your own show, and -- my, oh my -- would you ever cook!  You could sing and cook!  This is honestly so clever that I wish I could give it one hundred "likes."  Amazing, and so much fun!  :)  :)  :)  I'm going to be humming songs from "My Fair Lady" for a week!  LOL

Sing on, Lura! -- and if any lyrics come to you, post them here :)

[peacheslatour]

Quote

How about Ree cooking her way through old school techniques - exploring (and explaining)  fermenting, canning, salting, jellies, jams, pickling, butchering, putting aside provisions, etc, but with a modern day edge.

See this is what I expected the show to be like with a name like Pioneer Woman. Instead it should have been called Uncreative Ways To Use Church Lady Recipes and Make Your Family Fat.

Edited September 2, 2017 by peacheslatour

[Lura]

Coincidentally, this is also what I expected the show to be. (There's that stuck bold key again).  I still wish that Ree would talk much more about Osage County and the Osage nation.  The particulars escape my memory, but just the other day Ree mentioned that one of her dishes was very popular among the Osage people.  My ears perked up in hopes that Ree would elaborate, but she did not.  It seems to me that there are so many missed opportunities on this show -- chances to make it so much more entertaining.  If Ree cared to put in a little more work on research instead of shoving the Merc down our throats, she might stand a chance of having a respectable show.

[anneofcleves]

On 8/31/2017 at 1:48 AM, txvoodoo said:

I think she should be a contestant on every damned FN competition when they have FN celebs on them, just so we can watch her be humiliated. Chopped, Cutthroat Kitchen, Next Iron Chef, Guy's Grocery Games, you name it.

I'd especially like to see her beat down by Alex G or Amanda F.

Oh, that would be so great.  She's such a hack, and it would be kind of fun to see her struggle if given only a few ingredients that didn't include butter and sugar.  I can just imagine the commentary from the judges, "What's that method she's using on that standing rib roast?  She appears to be boiling it, while muttering maniacally about not being able to find the lemon pepper.  Oh wait, she has located some marshmallow fluff and a blow torch and now seems to be ensconsing the standing rib roast in fluff.  Tell me, Alton, have we seen anything like this in the history of Food Network?"

Edited September 4, 2017 by anneofcleves

[peacheslatour]

"Alton, is she actually going to use that ghost pepper to make Crepes Suzette? Why is she pouring sweetened condensed milk and mayonnaise all over those escargot?"

Edited September 5, 2017 by peacheslatour

[Lura]

12 hours ago, peacheslatour said:

"Alton, is she actually going to use that ghost pepper to make Crepes Suzette? Why is she pouring sweetened evaporated milk and mayonnaise all over those escargot?"

I suspect that the milk and sugar are for drenching the escargots in caramel.  It sounds to me like Chuck's birthday may be coming up, and she'll do anything to impress Chuck.

[Lura]

I love the above imaginary conversations!  LOL  Wish we had more of that in here!  Great fun! 

What about beans coated in caramel since Ree has six recipes for them?  This would give her a 7th, and her followers would adore them.

[Lura]

Ree seems to be fond of making those "10 questions" shows like "10 Reasons Why I Love Ladd" or whatever.  Having noticed on her Ree-runs lately that her hair color goes from red to brown and then back again, I wonder whether she'll do a "10 Questions About My Hair" one of these days.  I'd watch it.