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Small Talk: Put a Bird On It

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Welcome to Portlandia's Small Talk thread! The Small Talk topic is for:

  • Introductions
  • Off-topic chatter
  • Having virtual tea with forum buddies
This is NOT a topic for actual show discussion. When you want to talk about the show:
  • Figure out the nature of the topic you want to talk about
  • Look for an existing topic that matches or fits
  • If there is NOT an existing topic that fits, CREATE ONE!
Examples of topics that populate show forums include (but by no means are limited to):
  • Character topics
  • Episode topics
  • Season topics
  • Spoiler topics
  • Speculation topics
  • In the Media topics
  • Favourite X topics
  • ...you get the idea
Happy trails beyond Small Talk!

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Carrie Brownstein can never do wrong by me. Musically or otherwise. Well, she is kind of standoffish in person, but that happens. 

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Whenever I see any article of clothing or item with a bird/birds on it I immediately text a pic to the boyfriend, who always replies back with "put a bird on it!"

 

I heart both Fred and Carrie too, too much. :-)

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I wonder if we could have a thread with just us Portland people confirming everything about the show. At times I'm waiting for Fred and Carrie to jump out of the bushes. 

 

For example, I was painting my house this summer. One thing about some people in Portlandia is that they are sure everyone wants to hear their opinion. So as I power-washed my house, a woman asked me why I was "wasting so much water". I explained that pressure washers use less water than a garden hose and I use less water than someone with a lawn. Swoosh over her head. "But I asked why you are wasting water?" I told her that paint won't stick to dirt. She walked away unconvinced.

 

Then a day or two later when I was spraying paint, she's back with another question: "Why are you spraying those chemicals?" I explained water-based latex and swoosh over her head again. She rambled on about a good friend dying of cancer, as if I had caused it. I went up the ladder and waited for her to leave.

 

A few days later I'm painting the trim with a brush and the consciousness of Portland arrives again. I actually want to know what this comment is because I'm painting with a brush. Are you ready?

 

"Why didn't you hire a local artisan to paint for you?"

What?

"Portland has many talented artists. Why didn't you hire one of them?"

How do you know I'm not one of them?

 

And she walked away. 

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I hope Kumail is in this season. I can watch his skits over and fucking over. He kills me. Around The World in 80 Plates and the cellphone sales guy? The best!

Also, just watched Fred and Carrie on Jimmy Fallon. I find her to be just stunning! I hope she's stand-offish in person (as someone mentioned above) only bc she's shy, and not a bitch.

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I wonder if we could have a thread with just us Portland people confirming everything about the show. At times I'm waiting for Fred and Carrie to jump out of the bushes. 

 

For example, I was painting my house this summer. One thing about some people in Portlandia is that they are sure everyone wants to hear their opinion. So as I power-washed my house, a woman asked me why I was "wasting so much water". I explained that pressure washers use less water than a garden hose and I use less water than someone with a lawn. Swoosh over her head. "But I asked why you are wasting water?" I told her that paint won't stick to dirt. She walked away unconvinced.

 

Then a day or two later when I was spraying paint, she's back with another question: "Why are you spraying those chemicals?" I explained water-based latex and swoosh over her head again. She rambled on about a good friend dying of cancer, as if I had caused it. I went up the ladder and waited for her to leave.

 

A few days later I'm painting the trim with a brush and the consciousness of Portland arrives again. I actually want to know what this comment is because I'm painting with a brush. Are you ready?

 

"Why didn't you hire a local artisan to paint for you?"

What?

"Portland has many talented artists. Why didn't you hire one of them?"

How do you know I'm not one of them?

 

And she walked away. 

I started a thread that I think is along the lines of what you're looking for. Please feel free to share your Portland stories! Please also know you're welcome to start threads about many things that you might like to talk about. 

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