S17.E08: A Chorus Whine

[davidcalgary29]

Our queens stumble back to the Werkroom, in a daze that Crystal -- who really did have all the goods -- has been booted from the competition. Their surprise feels neither feigned nor forced, leading many of the queens to wonder if their outspoken criticism of subterranean mineral extraction will lead them, too, to a surprisingly early exit from the competition. Okay, I made that one up, but they still look worried.

The next morning, the queens convene around the Werktable to contemplate the day's pending challenge, but their pleasant reveries are interrupted when Ru steps onto the set and brightly informs them that it's time for a musical! Some of the queens leap up and scream with excitement, clearly never having watched one of these "Rusicals" before. But they -- and we -- must not give up hope for a watchable product! Ru chirps at them that this year, they'll be performing "The Pending Humiliation of Suzie Toot" (aka "The Wicked Wiz of Oz") which is a "mashup of Wicked, The Wiz, and The Wizard of Oz", according to deluded PAs. Well no, it's not. As at least one of the queens points out, it's actually an interpretation of the much more boring "A Chorus Line", with each performer (or group of performers) presenting an "autobiographical" skit as they try to secure a spot in an upcoming production of "The (Wiz)ard of Oz". It's...fine as a concept, I guess, but as "A Chorus Line" had a stale and cliched plot even in the seventies, we're sort of on shaky ground before we even start this one.

Familiar ground is tread as the queens make a half-hearted attempt to inject life into the proceedings by bickering and squabbling over the juiciest roles. Suzie proves her acting chops by making it seem as if she actually wants to wrest the flat and listless role of Dorothy from a feisty Acacia, but it would probably be clear from anyone who read what there was of a script that this was a snoozer of a part. After some jostling, during which Suzie fairly points out that the role may not play to Acacia's strengths, a number of the queens comment on Suzie's "shadiness" for doing this. Um, okay, but wouldn't it have been shadier to give in to Acacia quickly, and then snipe from the sidelines, like Kori and Lexi? I guess we'll have to take drama from wherever we can this episode.

The queens rehearse with Michelle, and Suzie "I've Been Doing Musical Theatre for Over a Decade" Toot proves that she's no novice by nailing her part immediately, impressing Michelle and the sound guy. Onya sounds AMAZING while recording her part, earning a rare shout of praise from Michelle. I'm just going to jump ahead and say this: even though Jamal throws around some invented bullshit at judging, Onya should have won this challenge. Period. The other queens have their usual vocal struggles, but no one sounds hopeless.

On the Main Stage, Ru introduces the panel, which includes a glittery Adam Lambert. Is this really the first time he's been on the show since he lusted after April Carillon on S6? Time does fly! We then segue into the Rusical, which is rather a ho-hum affair, as you can tell that there's been a tremendous amount of vocal sweetening, so there's relatively little tension throughout the show. Suzie, Jewels, and Onya are the standouts; Sam is okay; Kori, Lydia, Arietty, Lana, and Lexi do "good work" according to Ru, but they're entirely forgettable. A listless Acacia closes the solos with a boring song, and while she isn't terrible, it isn't very good, either. And after all the criticism thrown at Suzie, I think it's fair to comment that Acacia really does need to work on her makeup, as she paints her Dorothy here as a coked-out twenties Garbo impersonator. Hot!

After an ensemble number, the musical ends and we segue into the Runway, with the theme this episode misleadingly labelled as "Shady Ladies", aka "Whores with Parasols". While the costumes are, overall, pretty good, the repeated silhouettes makes a review difficult, and they all sort of blend in together. Sam is fantastic in a floral fantasy, and Jewels looks nice in black, but it's honestly difficult to remember anything else about this collection. Lana brings up the rear in a costume she claims that Luxx wore for one of her runways -- why would you do that? -- and hopes it brings her luck, too. Well, I can't remember Luxx ever walking in this, and Lana doesn't do much with it, either.

The judges kibbitz and deviate from a familiar pattern: Suzie, Jewels, Onya, and Sam are declared the tops of the week, leaving Acacia and Kori in the bottom. The Judges sling around even more bullshit than usual this week, and it's dumb, so I'm not going to spend much time on it. The most ridiculous moment: Jamal criticizes Onya for "not getting the choreography right away". And? So? What the hell does it matter if the flaws didn't show in the final product? If they really wanted some valid criticisms, Production should have left the original vocals into the show, as you know then that only Onya and Suzie would have sounded remotely talented. Whatever, people! Sam wins for her Cher Schtick, proving once again that making Ru laugh is the only meaningful criterion for these modern-day challenges. I mean, she was fine, and her runway was great, but I'm going to repeat this here: Onya was the clear winner. Period. 

Acacia and Kori steel themselves for a lipsynch to Lambert's "Wet Dreams", and it's by far the best song that we've been given as a lipsynch this season. Acacia, as Suzie states, "does her best", and no, that's not a shady comment when it's 100% factual. I haven't particularly been impressed by Kori's talents on the season thus far, but she brings a certain energy and presence to her performance that fits in much better with this upbeat dance track. Kori stays! Acacia thanks the Judges and walks off the stage, looking happy that she can go home. At the beginning of the season I thought I'd be saddened by Acacia's inevitable ouster, but I honestly can't recall much of anything that she did on this season with any degree of distinction. Go home, be proud of yourself, and work on that paint, girl!

Next week: ANOTHER sewing challenge threatens to send the queens into sartorial seizures as they're challenged to create an outfit "inspired by Betsy Johnson". You mean the actual person, who appears to be the guest judge, and not her fashion collections? How the hell would you do that? Maybe they'll be forced to create ouchfits like that awful "child's art" challenge on Season 9 of Project Runway, when Bert sent his model out in a MC Hammer jumpsuit with ugly geometrics taped all over it. Awesome!

Edited 22 hours ago by davidcalgary29

[Starchild]

I agree that Rusical was boring and confusing. And I didn't care who won the lip sync.

How many more episodes?

[davidcalgary29]

2 minutes ago, Starchild said:

I agree that Rusical was boring and confusing. And I didn't care who won the lip sync.

How many more episodes?

Too many? I'm guessing 9, as Ru appears to be channeling Dionne Warwick's fascination with numerology these days.

[Starchild]

I'm sitting here trying to figure out who I want to win, and forgetting at least half of them.

[Madding crowd]

I actually liked the rusical for some reason and most of the queens did well to passable except for Acacia who performed Dorothy like a funeral dirge. The Cher part wasn’t that great but of course Ru and Michelle laugh like loons over someone flipping their hair and sayin “ohhh” . Suzie is my favorite so I wanted her to win and thought she did great. 

Edited 14 hours ago by Madding crowd

[janeyjay]

Aged Theater Diva here and I personally was impressed with how the "Oz" musical things were blended with the "A Chorus Line" framework. I know "Chorus Line" like the back of my hand, having been obsessed with it during my teen years late in last century and whoever wrote this did a marvelous job. Onya should have won; bless Acacia's heart; and Adam Lambert's top appeared to have shoulder pads from the Dorothy (Zbornak) collection (however he was a great judge and such a voice!)

[bluvelvet]

I enjoyed this episode. I thought the rusical was fun and everyone did well except for Acacia who was unfortunately boring boring boring. I think Susie or Onya should’ve won but I think they didn’t want to give them a 3rd win. I’m okay with Sam Star though. 
The lip sync song I enjoyed and I thought Kori appropriately won and gave a strong  performance. I enjoyed the energy she brought even if I think her drag is sub par. I was sad to see Acacia go - must also suck to have fought for the role and then perform poorly. 

[violet and green]

So bummed Acacia is gone. Pretty impressive to be singing that beautifully, and handling all the physical pressure of the schedule while living with Cystic Fybrosis.  I really liked her, and was hoping she'd stick around a while longer.

I don't find the rest of the cast at all likable. I guess there's still Onya to kind of root for...