S01.E05: Boobie: the Shequels

[davidcalgary29]

Our queens return to the Werkroom to sift through the audience's fading hopes that this season will actually start to go somewhere -- or provide more than sporadic entertainment. Some PA tells the queens to moan and bicker about the maxi challenge results, but everyone is clearly tired, and "Untucked" sort of just fizzles out.

Ru enters the Werkroom to find a manic Alyssa trying to raise spirits amongst a group of talented performers who just look morose over their lost bookings while filming this mess. I don't blame them! The episode then faceplants as Ru forces an unwanted reading challenge on the room. It's bad. It's really, really bad, and I'm surprised that they aired this. That episode running length had to come from somewhere, I guess!

We painfully pivot to the maxi challenge, which is about as dumb as things get these days: the queens are split "randomly" into three groups to create faux trailers for stupid movie sequels loosely (very loosely) themed on Barbie. The visual gag presented here, of course, is that everyone will sport gigantic breastplates in a season without Jimbo. Fun! Except it isn't. They really should have gone with Boobenheimer instead, which would at least have forced some creativity.

I am not going to expend any energy contemplating the fact that all three of the queens whose native language is English are placed on the same team. On an acting challenge. I will not, but later in the episode WoW trolls viewers on this point with a long shot on the runway which shows these queens separated from the others at the right of the stage, underlining the clear divide with which the show views its contestants.

The audience is force-fed all three awful trailers after a better-than-average runway that has no conceptual consistency beyond, as Kim Chi once wisely stated, "poo brown". The trailers are: Frankenboobie, Boobies of the Carribbean, and Jurassic Boobie. All are absolute trainwrecks, with Frankenboobie cratering into total unwatchability. HOW did this make it through planning?? Standouts (in a bad way) include the entire "cast" of Frankenboobie and Alyssa, who sinks to new levels of terrible with her acting when she reprises Joan Crawford (as Blanche, from her Baby Jane tragedy in AS2) in her skit. The Pirates parody is least painful and Kitty, on her team, is okay. Kween wins! Whatever.

Eva and Gala Varo are picked randomly as the bottom queens. They shrug, and do a disservice to every Gen Xer and boringly gyrate to "Take on Me", capturing none of the magic of an iconic song. I particularly hate Eva's reveals and hair, although Gala's performance is almost equally bad, as she misses the emotional core of the song and struggles with her ill-fitting corset. Ugh. Gala stays! I'm sorry that you had to suffer through this shitshow, Eva.

Next week: it's time for another ball! Production needs to fix this season. Fast.

Edited September 7 by davidcalgary29

[Starchild]

1 hour ago, davidcalgary29 said:

They really should have gone with Boobenheimer instead, which would at least have forced some creativity.

Doubtful.

Oh, and shenanigans.

[davidcalgary29]

5 minutes ago, Starchild said:

Doubtful.

 

Classic.

[Starchild]

1 hour ago, davidcalgary29 said:

I am not going to expend any energy contemplating the fact that all three of the queens whose native language is English are placed on the same team.

Pythia is also from an English speaking country, but notably not one judged by Ru. So might as well be placed with the "second-tier foreigners" I guess.

I guess Ru is going to go back and forth on those 3 until the finale. Hard to believe it could be anyone other than Alyssa (whom I love, don't get me wrong), but the other two are getting pushed pretty hard too.

Kitty's starting to get a bit obnoxious. "You were good girls, but not as good as us!" F*ck you, Kitty.

I too thought the pirate one was the best of a bad lot.

But yeah, the monster one was the worst (Vanity notwithstanding, who made a comparatively good monster).

[davidcalgary29]

I briefly thought about mentioning the queens' varying levels of proficiency in English, but it's clear that Ru only has two criteria for viewing these queens: those who she has judged before, and those she hasn't. I try to put that out of my mind when watching these episodes.

I'd also like to take a moment to carp about the trailers' narration. Is this the first time that Michelle has essentially done...everything? It really depersonalized each of the skits.

Edited September 7 by davidcalgary29

[SnapHappy]

I got really tired of Michelle, really quickly. 

I just don't like the acting challenges.  I would like for the producers to come up with more varied competitions.  Don't they have the entire back catalog of "America's Next Top Model" to look to?  And they can go back to the earliest Drag Race seasons & re-use some challenges. 

I'm ok with commercials though, maybe because they're shorter. 

This episode reminded me a little of the ANTM photo shoot where they dressed up as various Barbie-type fashion dolls & were photographed in a giant display box.  So cute & creative.  

I only half watched it.  I DID love the Aha lip synch though.  The judges & I knew the lyrics better than the contestants.  Because we were there.....*LOL*

Edited September 7 by SnapHappy

[davidcalgary29]

5 hours ago, SnapHappy said:

  Don't they have the entire back catalog of "America's Next Top Model" to look to?  And they can go back to the earliest Drag Race seasons & re-use some challenges. 

 

Oh, lord. If Ru comes in the Werkroom in a beret and a bad French accent, performing a skit about "one girl...Becky..." and moaning about just how mean other supermodels can be, we'll know that we've all stroked out. And really, aren't we already almost there? I didn't think that an obsession with "Rosemary's Baby" was a contagion spreading amongst Reality TV hosts, and yet here we are, seeing further evidence of a tragic contamination after AS9.

The international franchises have some great ideas that could be used to freshen things up, but there's nothing necessarily wrong with the mothership, either. Production is just screwing things up royally here with blatant favoritism, weird pacing, and terrible writing. It also doesn't help that some of the queens are acting like they're hostages this point, instead of voluntary participants on a TV show. And then there's Alyssa, who increasingly looks like she's at some type of Tent Revival. Did you catch her mouthing the words to "C.U.N.T." as Ru was speaking them? Alyssa 3.0 is sort of terrifying even while she mesmerizes.

This series is the weirdest thing I've seen in some time.

[Starchild]

4 hours ago, davidcalgary29 said:

Alyssa 3.0 is sort of terrifying even while she mesmerizes.

Alyssa "Cobra" Edwards

[SemiCharmedLife]

Most of the acting challenges are cringe-worthy and this ranks among the worst of them, due to the writing- I'm not blaming the queens.  As the Rusicals get better and better, the acting challenges continue to miss the mark.  I have no idea why overacting is the goal.  We've had some good acting in the past that was overlooked because the judges want over the top craziness.

I'm enjoying the runways, although there is a queen or two that is not up to par with the others.  Alyssa's runways are amazing and must have cost a pretty penny.

[Kaboom 2.0]

On 9/7/2024 at 12:44 AM, davidcalgary29 said:

H

I don't know why a quote by daviscalgary29 is included here in my reply, I can't delete it.

This may have been one of the worst acting challenges in recent memory from any iteration of Drag Race. Wow. Why can't they have a healthy balance of both good Rusicals AND good acting challenges?? 

Honestly the only runway look I remember is Nehelenia's cello look & having a flashback to Mo Heart's (I think it was her) how now brown cow look.

I liked Eva, she shouldn't have been in the bottom.

[TVbitch]

After Ru announced the challenge, I FF to the end because I figured there was no possible way it would not be excruciating. It's bumming me out to see the international queens getting bumped off. Ru does not seem particularly interested in them, and this also bums me out.

 

[MsJamieDornan]

On 9/7/2024 at 10:44 AM, SnapHappy said:

I got really tired of Michelle, really quickly. 

Every week.

[SemiCharmedLife]

On 9/9/2024 at 5:57 AM, Kaboom 2.0 said:

Honestly the only runway look I remember is Nehelenia's cello look & having a flashback to Mo Heart's (I think it was her) how now brown cow look.

I liked Eva, she shouldn't have been in the bottom.

I loved the cello look!  I think that will go down in her-story as one to remember!  

I was sad to see Eva go, as well. She is an outstanding queen and I am going to check out her season.