Small Talk: Doctor's Lounge

[ShortyMac]

Just bringing your reply here instead of clogging the episode thread, @izabella.

I don't entirely agree with that.  I can't tell you how many times my friends and I have said something similar...

"OMG, I am so lucky!  I can't imagine how my husband puts up with my neurotic/insecure/thoughtless/messy/etc. shit all the time!"

Those of us who have made mistakes in our lives in our pasts also feel grateful that someone loves us anyway and is willing to put up with our "stuff."   Those of us who have divorced, or who had many years of being alone before we found someone also feel grateful when we do.  Reznick's words to Shuan don't just apply to, or resonate with, someone with autism or who is disabled.

***

Reznick has said things like this to/about Shaun before. Those examples you listed don't apply. Having autism or a disability isn't something you can change like that, or get rid of. Yes, Shaun can try different therapies/techniques to help with his challenges, but, he'll always have them. You can choose to change for the better, or be a better person. 

Has the show shown anything positive with his relationship with Carly? Not much. It's mostly that he doesn't like to be touched, struggles with intimacy, and his sensory issues. My earlier reply:

It's about the "saint/hero" title that society places on parents/spouses/family/friends of disabled/non-neurotypical people. That Shaun or whoever should be grateful that anyone wants to be with them, and all that the media shows is their issues and struggles.

[TurtlePower]

On 1/15/2020 at 6:01 PM, ShortyMac said:

Just bringing your reply here instead of clogging the episode thread, @izabella.

I don't entirely agree with that.  I can't tell you how many times my friends and I have said something similar...

"OMG, I am so lucky!  I can't imagine how my husband puts up with my neurotic/insecure/thoughtless/messy/etc. shit all the time!"

Those of us who have made mistakes in our lives in our pasts also feel grateful that someone loves us anyway and is willing to put up with our "stuff."   Those of us who have divorced, or who had many years of being alone before we found someone also feel grateful when we do.  Reznick's words to Shuan don't just apply to, or resonate with, someone with autism or who is disabled.

***

Reznick has said things like this to/about Shaun before. Those examples you listed don't apply. Having autism or a disability isn't something you can change like that, or get rid of. Yes, Shaun can try different therapies/techniques to help with his challenges, but, he'll always have them. You can choose to change for the better, or be a better person. 

In bold, THIS. As a female with HF autism, the pressure to seem "normal" is immense. We tend to mimic the behavior of others in order to fit in and it's exhausting--we feel like we can't be ourselves in public, AT ALL. I spent over half of my life trying to copy others versus getting to know and dealing with my actual self. This is extremely detrimental and damaging. Autism is a neurological disorder, not a narcissism or selfishness problem. In my attempts to copy others and disguise my disorder, I wound up failing miserably and feeling even unhappier in the process. 

Now? I allow my quirks to come out; it's easier than suppressing them just to appease neurotypicals. I let people around me know about my disorder so they're aware if I have a meltdown or can't speak properly. I don't have many friends, but the ones I do are really good ones who I trust and can be myself around. It's SO much easier than trying to fake my way through life just to try and please people. 

Edited February 9, 2020 by TurtlePower

[bros402]

17 hours ago, TurtlePower said:

In bold, THIS. As a female with HF autism, the pressure to seem "normal" is immense. We tend to mimic the behavior of others in order to fit in and it's exhausting--we feel like we can't be ourselves in public, AT ALL. I spent over half of my life trying to copy others versus getting to know and dealing with my actual self. This is extremely detrimental and damaging. Autism is a neurological disorder, not a narcissism or selfishness problem. In my attempts to copy others and disguise my disorder, I wound up failing miserably and feeling even unhappier in the process. 

Now? I allow my quirks to come out; it's easier than suppressing them just to appease neurotypicals. I let people around me know about my disorder so they're aware if I have a meltdown or can't speak properly. I don't have many friends, but the ones I do are really good ones who I trust and can be myself around. It's SO much easier than trying to fake my way through life just to try and please people. 

yup

male with HF autism here and I feel like I wear another face when I go out in public - to the point where as of late, as I have been under a high amount of stress, I have been have a lot more in the way of physical manifestations of anxiety & my "stereotypical" autism behaviors (rocking, stimming, etc.)

I used to think that everyone had to wear a different "face" when they weren't at home. Turns out it's not something neurotypical folks have to do 😛

At least not to the extent people with autism have to

[Gramto6]

On 2/10/2020 at 12:37 AM, bros402 said:

yup

male with HF autism here and I feel like I wear another face when I go out in public - to the point where as of late, as I have been under a high amount of stress, I have been have a lot more in the way of physical manifestations of anxiety & my "stereotypical" autism behaviors (rocking, stimming, etc.)

I used to think that everyone had to wear a different "face" when they weren't at home. Turns out it's not something neurotypical folks have to do 😛

At least not to the extent people with autism have to

I think we all wear a different "face" in public related to our life experience be it autism/whatever or a sadly horrific childhood experiences of abuse and later in life adult abuses. I am neurotypical as far as I know, but have suffered  so much abuse in life that I guard my exposure and am basically a hermit I feel for anyone for whatever that holds them back, but I don't think it is reserved to just people with autism.

[statsgirl]

From the Fixation thread:

12 hours ago, Annber03 said:

At first I was thinking this would lead to a deeper discussion/storyline about the issue many women have where doctors dismiss their symptoms as no big deal only for it to be something more serious down the line. It wasn't really touched on here, but I do think there could've been something to that with this woman. 

 I just saw them do this on a show called Canadian medical show called Transplant and got all excited.  A woman came in with pain, got blown off by the attending as endometriosis

Spoiler

and sent home, returned with a ruptured cyst and ended up losing an ovary.

When the resident came in to kind of apologize, the women blew her off. It was awesome.

This is only the second episode of the show but they're hitting a lot of right notes.

[TurtlePower]

9 hours ago, statsgirl said:

From the Fixation thread:

 I just saw them do this on a show called Canadian medical show called Transplant and got all excited.  A woman came in with pain, got blown off by the attending as endometriosis

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and sent home, returned with a ruptured cyst and ended up losing an ovary.

When the resident came in to kind of apologize, the women blew her off. It was awesome.

This is only the second episode of the show but they're hitting a lot of right notes.

They ought to do a story that happened to me: I kept going to the ER for severe back pain. Was blown off and called a drug seeker. Turns out, I had a severely ruptured disc and all they had to do was send me to the MRI to find it. Because it waited so long, to this day I still have issues from the nerve damage I suffered. 

Still haven’t forgiven them for this. I even asked them to send me to the MRI and they just wouldn’t. Got the test—and emergency surgery—at another hospital.