Brooklynista

I'm so glad Matt is happy about the entire family being together for Christmas...oh wait, not your family Matt? Those folks don't exist anymore huh? ok then. Farrah, Simon could give a rats ass how much you spend on your own ring. Get the biggest one they have in the store. He could give a shit. Keep trying to fool the America that that man halfway likes you. and finally, Taylor buys a business ( wink wink) with no knowledge of how to run even the website? or do inventory? Alrighty. ETA: Why is Catelynn meeting with her "counselor" in the copy room?

"Don't let this neck brace fool you!" I would have liked more back story into why Elmira didn't raise her own daughter and instead give her all into raising her step-daughter. I guess that's not why we were there.

But in a pinch, a Rick will definitely suffice.

Hasn't Carl learned anything from the last time he was playing wth zombies in the woods?

Yes Michonne!! Ride the brakes offa that man! All that chocolate and vanilla mixed together was almost too much for me to handle!

These ladies need to stop agreeing to go on these Caribbean trips. As enticing as it may be, the climate is doing them no favors in this day of hi-def teevee. The high shine, giant pores and bad skin were on full display tonight. TPTB really need to stop with to tight shots. they all looked very greasy at that dinner. No Bueno.

We have 10 stalls in the ladies room at work. 10. This isn't a rush hour so the bathroom was empty. I pick a stall so I can go and in walks another customer. No biggie. Why do you have to use the stall RIGHT NEXT TO ME???? The entire place is empty! Pick any other stall! And I know we ladies like to sumo squat over public toilets but why are your feet in my stall??? Are you cruising me? Give me some room. There's plenty of room. I always try to leave at least one empty stall in between if we're not in a rush hour like 5pm. No reason for this woman to be my neighbor.

Cate and Tyler are so...old. They are so weirdly frumpy it isn't funny. They fancy themselves as the most cultured people in the trailer park. Sort of a bootleg BrandonandTeresa. Everything about them is so senior living. From the doilies in the house to the way she calls him "honey". I dont know anyone under 45 that calls their mate honey. It's so dated. Remember when they went to that bed and breakfast? It was a place for an older married couple that needed a chance to reconnect. Not two childless twenty somethings. Why not Vegas? Or Miami. Because they don't know how to be! They're playing at being grownups. They live the life that they think they've modeled after BrandonandTeresa. Instead of the Hamptons, they have Trailer Park Chic.

^^Welcome SDH. You have clearly made yourself at home dropping pearls like this.

Screw you fat man! I could barely feel happy for Ashley because my rage for her husband kept getting in the way. Did he really think Ashley was the only one with a weight issue? Dud he really leave the doc visit to go to a drive thru to suck down a bacon burger? Seriously? Then at the end he saw the light and decided to eat veggies because she deserved it? Oh, not because he looked like he was only six pounds lighter. On a happier note, Ashley was pretty mobile for 700 pounds. I enjoyed how she got it done with minimum of self pity.

Even if there was no Jayde or new baby on the way, why the fuck can't Taylor do laundry? None of these folks have real 9-5 jobs so everyone should be capable of pulling their own weight. How did MTV find an entire squad with absolutely no real life skills?

Good Question. How much would one have to be paid to have their caption read "Farrah's Boyfriend". I know for me it would be a pretty high cost. Think of the reruns. Think of the ridicule. The embarrassment. Ugh. Even years from now when the show is off the air and you think America has forgotten about that time in your life when you whored yourself out to a wack-a doo woman and her daughter who's currently on trial for eating her college roommate, someone in the Whole Foods line will say "Hey! Aren't you Farrah's boyfriend?, Yeah! Its you!" That alone has to be worth millions. Please Simon, don't be doing this to yourself simply for anal and some teevee shine.

http://abc7ny.com/news/surgery-patient-wakes-up-to-missing-belly-button/1203756/ Say what now? I just can't see letting this man botch up my body any more than it is. Why have him perform any body work? He's a bariatric surgeon, not a plastic surgeon. It does say losing a belly button might be a side effect of removing excess skin, but I just don't think the man makes any real effort. He's more of a skin hacker. There's no finesse to his body work.

Listen, Farrah is getting married to this man. You hear me? No little nitpick like snotty hands, blatant disinterest or the loathing he clearly feels for her and that brat of hers is going to get in the way of that.

So I guess it's safe to say that all of these girls are sponsoring everyone around them. Maci has Taylor on the payroll and she buys him silly companies to play CEO with. Farrah has both of her parents punching a clock and at her every beck and call. Cate and Tyler have I don't know how many people filling out time sheets and now Butch is going to get a monthly stipend for rent. Amber much have the biggest mooch of them all since Matt isn't even pretending to work and she just bought him a house to tinker in instead of a Lego set. He seems to also be a fan of that XIOS store for men I always see in the mall. Like a male Forever 21. The crash landing that is going to happen for these people is going to be so very hard. None of them have any schooling. None of them have any work experience. With the exception of Farrah, none of them have any outside income or any hustle in them to get any income besides this MTV check. What's going to happen when the next Jersey Shore comes on the air and finally pushes them off MTV's schedule. Do they realize how quickly they are about to age out of of MTV's demographic? If nothing else they should be demanding that their parents and boyfriends get jobs. But no! Play Big Willies and make the entire town part of the entourage. I cannot wait for the fall. Yes, I would like fries with that. Is Kim the only grown up with a job with benefits on this show??

Even if it comes out that HALF of the kids don't belong to Matt, I need for Amber to tell me why at 20something she feels to be attached to somebody with that many damn kids. WHY? I don't know why these chicks define their worth by having a man. What's that song? 10% of something beats 100% of nothing at all.

I'm starting to think Tyler doesn't want Butch to leave because it keeps Catelynn off of him. He can say "oh no, my dad is in the next room". I'm not sure how well that works though. We've seen the way she hops on him like she's an 80lb waif.

I'm never sure which is worse. Tanya Harding's club wear or Dorothy showing up in tank tops and shorts to rummage through piss and shit.

It won't be too many years before Maci wishes she had stuck to only blow jobs with Taylor. It'll probably happen when she has to write the first alimony check.

I guess if he gives her a pity fuck once every few years he still classifies as her lover. I guess...

Tyler really didn't appreciate Butch overshadowing his second attempt at delivering his suicide failure story. The last try to tell the story fell flat and Tyler was going to to have his tale heard by golly. But wouldn't yaknow it, here comes Butch with a story of being abused as a child. Foiled again! Tyler could barely eek out a There There for the man. We don't believe your bullshit saga Tyler. Give it up.

Like Manny said on Modern Family,"Amenities really change when that H turns into an M".

Was it ever explained why grown ass Doug was still in Ellen's house? Grown man crying because mommy invades his space in the basement?? In the words of my girl Judge Judy "AH-MOVE!".

I never thought of Bubbles as a pedophile. If he was touching himself oddly, it was probably a junkie itch. McNulty had him pretty far away from his corner where he could cop.

Since the Tooth Fairy gives her $600 every time she loses teeth, Soofeeyaa probably keeps knocking them out each time a new set tries to come in.