LadyoftheLake23

Thank you, @mamadrama for saying this! My niece is also an American married to a Brit, and like you and your husband they met organically. They were both working for a nonprofit organization founded by former British PM Tony Blair that raised funds to buy mosquito nets for African countries to prevent malaria and other mosquito-borne diseases (apparently mosquito nets are like gold in Africa - very expensive). They were part of a group that went on visits to several African countries to learn and understand about the need for the nets as part of their jobs. They hit it off on the trip, stayed in touch, visited back and forth, and about 5 years ago he came over on the K-1. And like you and your husband, they're not losers! Both are college educated (in fact, he came here because she was in the middle earning her Ph.D!) and have good careers. I appreciated your standing up for yourself and others like you. There IS a difference between some of the folks on the 90 Day franchise shows and real life couples like you and your husband/my niece and her husband.

First off I want to thank you all for some much needed laughs. Found out yesterday that two co-workers have tested positive for COVID. I don't think I have been exposed because I've been working at home, but I was in on Thursday, so who knows? More importantly I'm worried about my co-workers - we have a great staff and I hate to think of any of them having this. Okay, onto my thoughts (FWIW): Libby and Andrreii - Loved the wedding (that church is spectacular!) and the reception, and of course agree with you all that Chuckles, Jr. was that drunken relative who makes an ass of himself at every wedding. I thought Andrreii handled it well - told Chuckles, Sr. to let him have the mic when they were fighting over it - hey, he knew how drunk he was and that he'd just make an ass of himself, leaving Andreii smelling like a rose! Then Libby at the end starts clapping to make the Modovans think he said something good (pretty sure they weren't fooled, though - you could tell by their faces that they knew something unkosher was going down). Also, that outburst about Sr. paying for the wedding and how unfair that is to the other kids, etc. was very telling, especially when he was whining about "you do it for HIM?" No mention of his sister, that their Dad did it for her. Sounds like he's jealous of Andreii for some reason.. Maybe because he realizes he's a drunk/addict with several DUIs on his record and Andrreii is not? Wonder what happened when Andrreii took him outside. (My bet: Andrei said to him, "You do realize that Sharp Entertainment paid for this, not your father, don't you?" and enjoyed the dawning conprehension on Jr.'s face about what an ass he made of himself over a misunderstanding!) Much as it pains me, I have to give Chuckles, Sr. props for behaving himself and at least trying to make Jr. behave. But I do have to agree with everyone who thinks that the Family Libby are trying for a spin off.. They've used the entire Family Chantal playbook. If their next move is to hire a P.I. then we'll know for sure they're going for their own show! Angela and Mykull - Nice wedding. I actually kind of liked her tiara headpiece thing (I like when they're used with an updo like that) but who doesn't get appropriate undergarments for their wedding gown?? I was surprised she went along with the "obey" thing! She looked great in the red dress she wore to the reception, and it looked like it was fun. Could have done without Mykull's face in her crotch as he tried to get the garter off (seriously, in front of his Mother and Auntie??!) and her comments the next morning about their wedding night. TMI, Ange. Felt bad for her getting that phone call from Skyla. Lost my Mom in April so yeah, I know exactly how that feels. I wasn't on another continent, but given we were in lockdown and her facility was locked down, I may as well have been, so yeah, I felt for her. Then again, I wouldn't have left my Mom in that condition in the first place so while I felt it, I couldn't feel too badly. So now we get to see if he gets in on the spousal visa. Kalani and Asuelu - Here I thought Lo was going to kick Tammy and Asuelu's Mom's butts over the money thing, and he's mostly chill while Lisa goes after them. Good on Asuelu for standing up to them. I know it's a cultural thing, but I just can't with someone who thinks she comes before her grandchildren. She's got a green card, which means she can get a job and make her own money! And am I the only one that thinks Tammy is putting the pressure on Asuelu so she doesn't have to cough as much money up to Mama? Larissa and Coltee and Ericee - I don't know what was worse, Mykull in Angela's crotch, Coltee vomiting, or Larissa's surgery. Coltee's vomiting made me laugh, though because how out of shape are you that amount of exercise makes you vomit? And the surgery, well, I've seen much more graphic stuff on Botched (Larissa's next stop?), Dr. Pimple Popper and that foot show. Looking forward to Colt's convo with Debbie telling her to stay out of his relationships. THAT's going to go over real well, isn't it? Still, good on him for realizing she's a problem and taking steps to deal with it. If only he'd realize sending dick pics isn't a good idea either! Pole and Karinee - The less said the better.

I watched this last night too, mostly because I wanted to get the tea on the Florian situation (This may be mean, but I didn't like how Stacey treated Darcey when she and Tom visited Albania, and if she's going to be tortured in love I want to be there to see it. Karma, baby!). Agree with all of you who think he's not very attractive, and yeah, the way Stace described him - wow, what a winner she got there! Call me a softie, but I really felt for them in the whole teased dorky introverted high school experience backstory. They could have been telling my high school story, so I really connected with that. I couldn't see anything in their pictures that was so bad (they were kind of cute girls, and as several of you have observed, were actually quite attractive before trying to "improve" their looks) and that connected me even more - I'm in my 50s, and when I look back on my college era photos (I really was dorky looking in high school!) I was pretty cute - but I didn't see it then. It's only been the last 10-15 years that I've been able to look in the mirror and like how I look. That junior high and high school crap can stay with you, unfortunately, I didn't go the plastic surgery route - I was fortunate to have a stable family that loved me just as I was, which helped my self-esteem. I also had a decent college experience to buck me up. I feel like their family instability probably didn't help them any. Dad Silva seemed okay, but they did say he's about to get married for the fourth time, so that may say something about him as a Dad? Also, warring divorced parents probably didn't help. Nothing like feeling like a pawn being used to get back at the other parent to help your self-esteem, you know? Did not need to see Tom again, and am wondering about Stacey's reasoning for meeting with him. Either he's so thirsty for TV time he's willing to look like a pathetic schlub who can't leave Darcey alone so needs to be told to do so by her sister or there were some TLC/Sharp shenanigans going on to get Tom on this show and this was the best story they could come up with. Either way her "He keeps contacting Darcey and now he's contacting me so I need to meet with him to tell him to stop" story doesn't pass the smell test. Really, Stace, you can't just block him? Finally, for aforementioned reasons I kind of enjoyed Darcey spilling the possible cheating tea to her Dad and her general enjoyment of the situation, even if it was a bit high school.

I was over on Sunday's episode discussion when I saw this referenced so brought myself here to the couples thread to find out what the poster was talking about. This is some seriously disturbing stuff. I mean I don't even have words for how disturbing it all is. Like all of you I always thought Paul had some mental issues (the whole arson thing, running off when things get too emotional) but this is on a whole other level. I have to confess that before they came here when Karine's mother was crying and saying how afraid she was I thought she was being a little over-dramatic. I did get her being concerned about Karine and Pierre being safe with Paul just because of his volatility - but that was the extent of it. Now I think we all know what was really going on - the abuse was most likely going on before they came here and her mother knew all about it. That poor woman. I hereby apologize for thinking that of her. Glad Karine and Pierre are somewhere safe,and am hoping she doesn't go back to him. Unfortunately, most abused women do. And that stuff about the arson might have been on his parents' house? No wonder Father Paul wants nothing to do with him, and Mother Paul seems to be washing her hands of him. I would too! Although, given comments about "Father" in the past (like Mother and Paul were afraid of him) and Paul's apparent control/anger issues I wonder if there was any abuse in his childhood. Something like that - he likes younger, naive women he can control, is manipulative (threatening divorce before, taking her green card/immigration docs and Pierre's passport, etc.) and has anger issues. It all reads like there's something in the past that has effed him up mentally in a big way. Or he could just be a standard-issue sociopath. Either way, I can easily see him winding up that guy who goes on a shooting spree before killing himself. Or barricading himself in a house before shooting himself. I just hope Karine and the baby are long gone when that happens. Also, @mamadrama, so sorry about what you went through trying to reach out and help! Hugs from a neighbor to the north (Ohio)!

I think you may have something there, @Chalby. Back in the day I had a college roommate who was, well, "big a little bit," while I was 5 feet nothing and 99 pounds. Of course she was much better endowed than I was, and that's about the only physical attribute she had that was better than mine, so she started making snarky comments about me being flat chested. Now, I was only an A cup at the time, but I did have boobs, so it frosted me plenty, especially after she made that remark in front of the guy I was seeing at the time. I wasn't good with a witty comeback at that time, but after that incident I kind of stewed about it silently until I came up with one. Finally the day came when she said it again and I used my comeback. Never heard about my "flat" chest again! It wasn't until years later that I realized that it was a self-esteem thing on her part. We're not friends anymore*, and I don't regret what I said but I do feel bad for her and for others like her (like our 90-Day ladies) who think they have to have their girls hanging out to feel good about themselves. * The end of our friendship had nothing to do with this incident.

Can someone please tell me why some American women hook up with Muslim men, move to their Middle Eastern countries to marry them, then somehow think that they can fail to convert to Islam and continue to dress as they wish (usually with the girls hanging out), drink alcohol, etc. and their "soulmate" isn't going to have a problem with it? On this franchise alone we have Nickel, BGL, Rebecca, Laura and now Brittany. Seriously, I think we need some sort of social media-based PSA campaign to let women know that no, that's not how it works. Also, while we're at it, how about a PSA campaign to inform my fellow-Americans that being American doesn't grant some special status where, when overseas, you don't have to behave according to your host country's laws, morals, values and expectations? I mean, we've seen all that before, but Brittany took it to a higher level last night. Seriously, she doesn't even stop to think about this stuff. She's still legally married so can't marry Yazan ASAP and hasn't yet informed him about that. Common sense would tell most people to go along with the hijab thing and keep him and the parents happy. But no, she gets all mad about it, gets him angry on the way there, which of course, Mom and Dad picked up on right away. She just needs to pack her bag and leave now. (Pro tip: If you don't want to become a Muslim, don't even date a Muslim man, much less agree to marry him!) Sorry, she really chapped my butt this week. Thankfully, we had Armando and Kenny as the antidote. How cute was Kenny rockin' it out in the car? And Armando getting the apartment together and making that welcome plaque craft? I too hope everything works out for them, and can't wait to see his arrival and their reunion next week! Deaven needs to dump Jihoon and leave SK. He is NEVER going to grow up and man up. What I would give to have been a fly on the wall when he walked into his parents' place. Just when they thought they'd finally gotten rid of him - he's baaaaack! Agree with everyone who thinks Sumit is lying to Jenny again. Hope he follows through on going to the attorney the next day. Can't wait to hear what he has to say... Felt bad for Biniyam - he's really trying and Areola and her Mom were not having any of what he was dishing up. Yes, I know there's going to be a baby and both apartments were a hot mess (okay, one was downright horrifying), but give him some time to get them together. At least he's working on it, unlike Jihoon and Pole! And speaking of Pole, I wonder if his Mom used to be like Areola's, taking care of everything. Pole could be a cautionary tale for Areola's mother! Want your kids to grow up? Let them deal with the consequences of their decisions/actions!

In no particular order... Kalani and Assholu (kudos to whomever thought that name up!) - Look, I get that this guy came here from a completely different culture, etc. but I have to believe that every culture teaches that you don't always get what you want and sometimes you have to pull on your big boy or girl pants and deal with it. I'm over him sulking about not going to Samoa and his insulting his wife and mother-in-law, then walking out like a little kid runing away from home. I remember thinking he was this sweet man from a slower, more relaxed culture, and now I just want to see Lo open a can of whup-ass on him! Kalani needs to dump him ASAP and find someone who can be a real partner and parent. But yeah, I agree with those of you who brought up how she and her family act like she wasn't there when the boys were conceived. She's oddly passive when it comes to Assholu as some of you pointed out, and I don't get it. She's very pretty, and there are a lot of guys out there who would overlook her size, so she can definitely do better, Colte, Debbie and Jess - Poor Debbie having to witness that display in the car after a long flight. No wonder she got sick! However, did anyone else notice that her attitude changed dramatically after Jess' comment about wanting sex, the face sucking, and especially the conversation about kids? She was all kinds of possessive and jealous after that. My take on Debbie is that she's never really dealt with her husband's death and has made Colte a sort of substitute. She does for him what she did for hubby and so can pretend her hubby's not dead. Any woman in Colte's life threatens that and must be gotten rid of. But that's not healthy for anyone, and they both really need to get some help so he can live some kind of normal life. BTW, most older women are excited to hear their kids are talking about having kids. She seemed pissed off by that. Why? Because she knows sex and children are the things she can't give him so she doesn't want to hear that he wants it. Larissa - I really don't need to see anymore of this woman. Also, I knew it was Erik-ee before the big reveal. At first the voice sounded like Colte's to me, but I knew he was off to Brazil so it couldn't be. Then I remembered he and Erik sort of sound alike so I figured that's who it was. Sure enough! I can't believe he showed up and wants to get back together with her after all the b.s. she pulled. (Breaking up by text?!) Yep, I agree with the diagnosis of camera-whoredom! Lizzy and Andrreii - Just when I was starting to like him he gets all insufferably caveman again! Seriously, why the hell would he not interpret for his mother and Lizzy when they were trying to bond? Also, lying in his interpreting to Lizzy? Does he not understand she'll find out he lied when this episode aired? (Would love to have been a fly on their wall last night when that part came on!) Then bragging to his friends and brother about his life in America when he knows full well (he's only told us about men and women in Moldova about a billion times!) what their idea of a "real man" is and his lifestyle isn't it? Loved that Lizzy brought up that she's the bread winner in the family and he's a house husband! Also, glad I'm not the only one who noticed Father Andrreii playing with Eleanor in the background during the breakfast conversation. So cute! Angela and Mykull - Like most of you I'm giving her some side-eye for leaving with her mother so ill. As I mentioned in a reply to another commenter, I lost my Mom in April. I was unable to see her for her last 6 weeks due to the lockdown and once hospice notified us she was near death my siblings and I were allowed to go in to see her ONE last time and ONE time only. It was devastating not being able to be with her for those final weeks and days. I cannot imagine getting on a plane to a foreign country with her in that condition so I just can't understand Angela. I mean, look, she likely had the airplane ticket already and it was probably non-refundable. But still, take the penalty fee and stay with your sick Mom. You will never forgive yourself if she dies and you're not there! As for the apartment, Mykull did well, and it was refreshing to see an American bride-to-be see her foreign digs for the first time and not complain. Pole and Kreeny - I feel so badly for Kreeny. Depression, resignation, not sure what it is, but she seems to be suffering from something. And how could she not be when faced with what Pole has to offer her - a car with years-old garbage in it, that horrifying ramshackle first "house" they looked at and all. And good for Mary sticking to her guns like that! Probably should have given him this tough love years ago, but better late than never. And she's right not to let him in the house. I have a friend very much like him (only about twice his age) and suffice to say that's how she operates. She lives in another country now after marring a guy from there. He passed away a few years ago and since she's not close with his family there didn't seem to be much reason for her to stay. I clearly remember that when I told her that he had died, my Mom told me I shouldn't let her stay with me if she decided to come back to the States. She didn't need to worry because I had no intention of doing so, for the exact reason Mary told Pole he couldn't stay with her and Father Pole: You'll never leave! Tania and Syngin: Let's be honest: much of his drinking is about dealing with the shrew he married. Yes, I know according to her he drank alot in South Africa, but I'm sure he's drinking more now just to deal with his situation. What I don't understand is why they got married (look, sorry, "the 90 days" is no excuse. You shouldn't do the K-1 if you're not sure you want to get married!). She wanted kids ASAP, he doesn't even know if he want them - that should have been reason enough not to get married. Then there's the soulmate thing, which obviously still stings. It seems clear to me that Syngin is wondering if he gave up everything for a woman who maybe doesn't love him as much. That thought would fester, wouldn't it? Not that drinking is an acceptable way to deal with it, but it's hard for him to even talk about it when she won't let him talk! These two are a trainwreck, and need to end it ASAP.

I'm feel you on the bolded part, @Tuneful. Lost my Mom in April after a bout with Dementia plus a stroke, so yeah, watching Angela with her sick Mom is very painful.

Right? I mean who, upon meeting their daughter's in-laws for the first time, lets loose with a bazillion f-bombs in front of them? Even Grangela is too classy for that, and that's saying something!

Yes, she was made out as a heinous gold-digger in their season, but she is clearly a sweetheart who is devoted to little Bryson. What is it about this show that it rehabilitates some of these people in our eyes?

I have a confession to make: I was crying through most of Angela's talk with her mom. Not sure if I needed to put that in a Spoiler tag, but I have already run afoul of our moderator so I'm being extra cautious! Back to Ang - I loved the expressions on the doctor's face throughout the visit - sometimes trying not to laugh, sometimes horrified, and sometimes a mixture of stunned and horrified! Larissa: Agree with you all on the plastic surgery, and can I just say that if she wants to be a stripper she's got A LOT of work to do. Her friend was way better on the pole! And I howled about the blind date thing! Pole and Kreeny: Loved mother Pole laying down the law. She's so right that if they move in they'll never leave. I have a friend like that and yeah, you have to be strong and just say no! Also, found myself wondering about mother and father Kreeny - Brazil is in a heap of hurt right now with COVID19. Hopefully Tonatins is so far out in the boonies it hasn't gotten there yet, but then they have people going back and forth on the Amazon River ferry so who knows? Kalani and Asuelu: Let's be honest - he just wants to go back to Samoa and live there so he doesn't have to have a job and help with the kids and housework. And yeah, I wonder about his mental capabilities too. The romantic "date" was hysterical, especially when on her first throw Kalani got it almost in the center of the target. Asuelu needs to be very careful - she's got skilz! Coltee: I think we've established that Jess is just trying to use him for a green card, right? I mean she boldly said it and he didn't even flinch! The sick thing is I don't think he doesn't see it for a red flag, I think he just doesn't care. As long as she gives it up when he wants it he'll be her green card. No different from Big Ed when you think about it. Only, I kind of think with Coltee it comes out of lack of confidence/desperation, which is sad. Oh, and when he said his mom lives with him, the first thing that came to my mind was the show Castle - there was a scene in one episode where Castle (main character) tells Beckett (potential love interest) just that. When you're a wealthy, handsome, fictional multi-bestselling author that explanation works. When you're a real, schlubby, non-wealthy guy? Not so much! Tania and Syngin: He looks much better with shorter hair. And day drinking? A history of drinking on the job and destroying bar furniture? I was imagining Jon Taffer of Bar Rescue screaming about him about how wrong that is! Seriously, if he's applying for bartender jobs and they find out about that when checking references? Well, no wonder he's having a hard time finding a job. Also, why do so many people from other countries think jobs grow on trees here? Anyone else planning on watching Revenge of the 90-Dayers (or whatever it's called) tonight? I probably will, just to be able to snark later!

I'm thinking Andrrreeii's family is some sort of Catholic (Orthodox, maybe?) and having known a few Catholics I can tell you the very devout ones tend not to see any marriage outside of their church as valid (even if it took place in another denomination of Christianity) and will even see any offspring as illegitimate! I have a friend who's second marriage took place in Vegas. She and 2nd hubby had a child together, and when they hit a rough patch she went back to church - a Catholic church as that's the church she was raised in. When she asked to have their baby baptized she was told they would have to do a marriage ceremony there first. Hubby refused because their marriage was on the rocks (they wound up divorced so probably a good move on his part as it would have added an annulment into the mix). So I wouldn't be surprised if Ellie's baptism in Andrrrreeii's/his family's church is the same deal as my friend's kid's - she is seen as illegitimate until they get married in that church, and the won't baptize until she's seen as a legitimate offspring. Pretty archaic if you ask me, and makes me glad to be a member of a Protestant denomination!

Maybe not. It's been a long time since sex ed, but IIRC menstruation happens when an egg is released and is not fertilized. So her last aig maybe be a goner! Seriously though, she needs to get that looked at. Bleeding after two years of menopause can be a result of some pretty bad stuff, like cancer and STDs. Not something to write off as "Hey, I suddenly got my period again!"

If you only knew how many times I've heard "yeah, that's it, that's the ticket!" in my mind when some 90-dayer or another is trying to answer questions by his/her "soulmate"!

I have to agree with you, @Persnickety1. In early January there was a story all over our local news about a high school junior in the next county who had died of flu complications on New Year's Eve. I just Googled the story, and most of the stories describe flu-like symptoms, breathing problems and double-pneumonia. One mentioned that she was intubated and sedated, and another mentioned a stroke, too. Sound like anything we've heard of? One article did mention influenza B, but didn't specify her being tested so it's not clear if she actually was and where the reporter got that from (none of the others mentioned that). Also she was hospitalized once, got enough better to be sent home, then got worse again and went back - which is the classic COVID pattern. My suspicion is that she may have started off with the flu but then got COVID (maybe first hospitalization?). Plus, China was reporting this in December, which means people could have easily been coming from there with it in December. And I can see Vegas being somewhere the Chinese might be going (either for gambling or to conduct business). So yeah, I tend to believe Yolanda on this one.