KillingAdam

I live but to serve.

He and a certain someone who can't be named are Bestest Buddies. I'm waiting for the day that he unveils the My Pillow condom.

That conversation in the morgue with Caroline was like having a session with the worst shrink I ever saw. I do sort of fear that this a reset of sorts and that the overarching storyline of season one will be repeated this year, Eve and Villanelle play cat and mouse AGAIN, some semi-beloved (as much as someone can be beloved after knowing them for less than 10 hours) character on the "Good team" ie Eve's will be killed by Villanelle, I'm guessing Caroline's son. I'm REALLY hoping that Villanelle grabs that girls who asks to take a picture for her Instagram and throws her into the goddamn canal. That I will HEARTILY AND 100% APPROVE.

Kerr was certainly well known in the NBA and fairly well known to the larger world for his dad having been assassinated in Beirut and then having the ASU crowd viley taunt Kerr about his dad's death. And then there's the whole thing about he and Jordan getting into a fight at practice and Kerr getting his ass handed to him by Jordan and a huge kerfluffle about the fact that the Bulls trainer dared to drive out to Jordan's house to look him over/treat him after the fight while poor Steve was left to fend for himself. But I should have been clearer. the Lakers are a franchise that is always going to be pressured, whether they feel it/respond to it or not, by the media and the fans to have a 'name,' as head coach. Magic Johnson, Del Harris, Mike Dunleavy, Kurt Rambis, Rudy Tomjanovich, Mike D'Antoni, Byron Scott, these are all NAMES, known VERY well within the NBA community and often working the media/analysis/color commentator side of things.

"...some such absurdity." You FIEND.

EVERY SINGLE ONE of the Nick Offerman/Megan Mullally commercials about SLINGING, but ESPECIALLY the one where Megan goes on and on and on and on about "putting on some musk" as if it's the biggest turn on and sexist thing EVARS!!!. And of course, she's right, I mean could ANYTHING be a bigger turn on than someone who smells like they not only shit their pants but rubbed the shit over their entire body? I THINK NOT. Everyone and EVERYTHING involved with this campaign along with everyone associated with Parks & Recreation* EXCEPT Aubrey Plaza** need to be fed into the industrial wood chipper than Offerman surely has out behind his woodworking shop. *You might be saying to yourself, "Hey Parks & Recreation was AWESOME. It had Amy Pohler and that DELIGHTFUL weirdo Aubrey Plaza** and unfunny standup comic Aziz Ansari who makes me itch and nearly but not quite managed to RUIN Scrubs for me FOREVER. " Of course you are entitled to your opinion. For now. But you are WRONG. Except about DELIGHTFUL weirdo Aubrey Plaza**. **Miss Plaza gets to prance-sashay away and roam free because: 1) She is a DELIGHTFUL weirdo. 2) She was the voice of Grumpy Cat.

The way he says "MiraCLE waTER" is both teeth grindingly annoying yet oddly appealing. I suppose this stretches the idea of what constitutes an ad, but fuck it. Have you seen this bit from Kenneth Copeland? I haven't quite decided what is the most repulsive bit, the part where he attacks people for daring to approach someone like Oral Roberts whose ENTIRE LIFE is supposedly devoted to praying to God to help others and asking him to pray for them or someone they know, OR the bit about how commercial airplanes are nothing but long tunnels packed with DEMONS!!!!! Now I know that modern day air travel is a dumpster full of steaming shit and chunky barf, with the belligerent drunks who spent the 2 hours preboarding getting piss their pants level drunk in the airportbar/lounge, as well as the crying/screaming babies and the asshat kid kicking the back of your seat and the person shoving EVERYTHING THEY HAVE EVER OWNED INTO THE OVERHEAD BINS and oh Christ just blow my brains out. And here's an even more fun fact sure to grind your teeth down to the pulp, Copeland has a net worth of around $850,000,000 most of which is tax exempt 'cause he's a preacher. Not that I've ever set foot in one before but the new ads for Buffalo Wild Wings ensure the only way I will EVER set foot in one is after I've been tasered into unconsciousness and dragged facefirst over concrete.

I'm dreading the day Hollywood decides to try and make him into the next elder statesman action hero replacing Liam Neeson.

My brother is Vice President of live entertainment for Disney so yes I have.

25 years since Kurt Cobain locked himself in a greenhouse, wrote a suicide note, shot up with heroin and blew his head off with a shotgun. THAT is a full days work. Technically it's 25 years and two days since his body wasn't seen/discovered for a day, but HEY!!! close enough. The day he was discovered also happened to be the day that Pearl Jam played the Patriot Center in Fairfax VA. I had floor seats 4th row SLIGHTLY left of center stage. I didn't have cable at the time so had no clue that Kurt Loder was doing live updates on MTVNews. I listened to a mix tape on the way to the show. Walking to the venue I saw people standing around in groups, talking very quietly. Not what you'd expect from people outside a concert venue, but maybe that was how grunge music fans rolled. Got inside, went to a T-shirt stand, got a PJ shirt with a drawing of a puppet wearing a shirt that said 'freak' on it. I had ZERO interest in seeing/listening to the opening act which was another grunge band from Seattle, Mudhoney, so I just did laps around the concourse, occasionally stopping. Like outside there were groups of people, talking quietly, some seemed to be crying, there were people hugging each other. Again, I had ZERO CLUE. Made my way to my seat and it....well it certainly wasn't the best concert I've been to. Eddie Vedder isn't a great speaker even when he's dead sober, and he was 3/4's of the way through a bottle of wine when PJ took the stage. He said, in part, "Sometimes, whether you like it or not, people elevate you, it's real easy to fall." I STILL HAD NO IDEA WHAT THE FUCK HE WAS TALKING ABOUT. It wasn't until I got to my car and started driving home listening to our local rock station that I heard the news. And I didn't feel anything, good, bad or indifferent. I didn't like Cobain for a few reasons. Courtney Love being a huge one. Talk about a fucking no talent golddigger. She must have been the best cocksucker on the planet to get to where she was, 'cause she has ZERO musical talent. But I felt Cobain was a hypocrite and a phony. he was endless bleating about how Pearl jam sucked shit and were garbage and sellouts and the GREAT Nirvana were the ONE TRUE PUNK BAND and the ONLY BAND KEEPING IT REAL and the ONLY BAND ADHERING TO THE PUNK AESTHETIC. Lets just look at the actual facts. One band gave in to corporate pressure and changed the artwork for one of their albums. One band made music videos and the lead singer of that band would get on the phone to MTV and scream at the executives for 3 hours because they thought their videos weren't being played enough. One band demanded and was given complete control over the artwork and design on their albums, even when this cut drastically into their own royalties. One band refused to release a song as a single even though record execs at their label literally got down on their knees and begged. One band refused to make ANY music videos for over 6 years. One band refused to release ANY singles from an album saying that they felt the album should be listened to in it's entirety. The first band was Nirvana. The second band was Pearl Jam.

Like everything else in their history the Jets fucked up their new unis. There was ZERO reason to change them. The ones they had were classics, as much as ANYTHING about the Jets can be called classic or classy. That NEW YORK across the chest? SUCKS. That weird stripe across the shoulder? SUCKS. BLACK alternate jerseys? SUCKS. Black facemask? SUCKS. The only SLIGHTY good thing about these barfs is the shiny green helmet, but that is RUINED by the black facemask. BURN ALL OF IT.

Can ESPN please just stop with the whole ZOMG ZION WILLIAMSON IS THE BESTEST COLLEGE BASKETBALL PLAYER EVARSSSSS!!!!!! He isn't even in the top five greatest Duke players of all time. There has been more coverage of him blowing out one of his shoes than anything else he's done. The greatest college male college basketball player of all time is Lou Alcindor. The greatest Duke basketball player of all time is Christian Laettner.

Hey, stop stealing MY THING, which is a THING that is original and I came up with it ENTIRELY ON MY OWN and did not at all STEAL COMPLETELY from Drew Magary. Although I certainly approve of banishings provided they are done with a mob of enraged local citizenry armed with torches, shovels, at least one HUGE double bladed axe, pitchforks, (which are to be thrust in the air at random times) and inexplicably there must be at least one person brandishing a broom and at least three people wearing overalls.

For Halloween they had bags of fun size Twix mixed labels Left and Right.

I can't stand that John Cusack is the 'voice' for Chevy trucks. An asshole ranter like Dennis Leary for Ford, fine. Grumbly McTwang Sam Elliott for Ram, sure why the fuck not. But wimpy wusshat John Cusack for Chevy trucks? BLOW ME. It boggles my mind that he managed to sucker the entire female population into believing that Lloyd Dobler is what he's actually like. IT ISN'T.