oldCJ

I read the book Stinger and came into this knowing, like all adaptations, it would not be exactly the same. The book had too many ideas and none got well-developed. But the book characters were totally two-dimension yet far more interesting than what the show is giving us. Maybe the writing will pick up, but given the lazy trope-filled, stilted dialogue of the first two episodes, I'm not too hopeful. As for the horror, heavy inspiration from The Thing. I see some people making comparisons to Stephen King's Under the Dome, but this book came out long before King's. My nitpicks about the first two episodes: 1. What kind of vet saves a wasp in their kid's room? And then just let's it go assuming it won't sting her? 2. Everyone was ridiculously laid back and lacking any sense of urgency for a kid wandering off into the woods on a night when animals are going crazy. 3. The horses are acting up to the point where one impaled its own neck on a fence, and the husband of a vet is like "Welp, let's saddle 'em up and ride!" 4. Why is a woman who constantly smokes pot drinking whiskey to chill out? 5. Who keeps all their flashlights in a cabinet under the tv? If the power goes out seems like a stupid place to store them all. Why not have one in the kitchen? And how did the neighbor woman know where they were? 6. How did no one, including the teen who was riding the horse, notice the fence post sticking out of the horse's neck before loading it into the horse trailer? 7. Why did the neighbor woman appear to have rib bones in her head? But more importantly, she spent all day looking for her beloved dog Duke. Then her husband goes off to the woods to shoot a rabid animal. But when Duke runs off into those very woods later, she's like "meh. I'm going home." Plus she fails to notice her husband is back from the woods and his leg is torn up? Did she have an appointment she was late for? 8. A boy comes back dazed and bloody with an adult's handprints on his wrists, and his medically trained mother doesn't even bother to lift his shirt to check for other injuries or ask if he was touched or hurt anywhere else? 9. Why are all tv dads so stupid and randomly yelling at strangers? 10. How long did dinner take to make that it was bright day and then well-past sunset before it was ready? That family needs an instapot or something. I will say Canabananalism is a joke I never heard before so that's something I guess.

This show sounds like something I would love, but after one episode it’s a nope. Land of Eva Longoria Yelling at Everyone is not the show for me.

Cafe Redesigns Mind-boggling that Francesca stayed over Domnhall. Maybe he should have tried fake crying to save himself like she did. Francesca was the person who made the benches too high, who used the godawful cork that Michelle disliked and who was just as responsible for the tiny chairs as he was. “I went and found matching ones” means she not only was in complete agreement on the chairs but she is the one who made sure all the chairs were those chairs. And no, designing a bench the height of a table is not a “rookie” error. Really impressed by both the other teams and how well their design aesthetics came together. I would be thrilled to be the owners of those two cafes.

Those Wisconsin accents are going to do me in. That "comedian"'s voice was nails on a chalkboard. Poor Milwaukee chef dealing with a degenerative disease. But good for him for going on the show while he can! Yes! That really put me off of Kenny.

The right person won and the right pair went home. But to be honest, I didn’t even remember Anthony being on the show but he pulled it out. Matt is still killing it. I like Domnhall got called out for relying on his graphic skills. Finally the “professional interior designer” was put out of her misery. Had to laugh when she said she wasn’t going to paint circles on the wall because that’s been done so she instead cut circles into every piece of wood and made semicircles on the walls. I do feel bad she injured her hand at some point. I hope it wasn’t from inattentive stapling. I appreciated that Francesca did take on Michelle’s comments. But her room looked large only because she had a teeny table. The original rooms had twelve chairs around the tables and most designers used ten to twelve. But she had four chairs and a bench for two or maybe three if they squeeze in. I always wonder how many of the designers’ rooms get taken apart and remodeled immediately after the show. Like the caravan episode when the owner hated them all.

Excited to have a new season and in a totally new city. Paul Bartolotta made sense as a guest judge since he was integral in getting the show to film in his city. But what’s interesting is most of his career has been outside Wisconsin while his brother took care of the restaurants until Paul’s return less than ten years ago. His brother passed away a few years later and now Paul is the face of the Bartolotta group. I loved that two of the three top dishes were surprises. Michelle, the pit master, saying she hasn’t made pasta in years and 72 degree chicken guy whose name I can’t remember. The local chef Dan, who I remember being on Beat Bobby Flay, was getting on my nerves at first. Then hat guy was so bad that I forgot about annoying Dan and his flouncing on the meat case begging favors from the Whole Foods butchers. I am having a hard time remembering a more obnoxious chef than hat guy. The following is a brief litany of why he is awful. His Halloween costume-looking hat choice and then the chutzpah to insult Tom, a bald man who needs to protect his scalp from the sun, for his hats. He didn’t mock Kristen’s fear of sleeves or Gail’s sometimes questionable dress choices. The pint of salt he poured into his pot only to be surprised to discover the food was so salty that it had to be rinsed in the sink. Still cackling over the judge’s snark on that one. Him making liver and insisting on calling it offal despite every other cheftestant in Top Chef history calling it liver since it is a very common food used for paté, fois gras, chopped liver, and in many other cultures. He wasn’t using something uncommon or that otherwise gets tossed out. Liver is the thing that kept Sara from winning Top Chef All Stars and the source of one of the earliest most iconic mistakes back in season two when Ilan used it with chocolate much to the disgust of Eric Ripert, etc. But hat man prides himself on using waste foods but chose the one organ that is not something most people in the culinary scene shy away from like other variety meats. His time management was appalling, hand rolling out his pasta with little time to spare, his amateur chopping skills were amateur, his use of the word sexy, his accusing another chef of theft because he wanted an item she picked up first. I assume he thought he was bringing the drama that the producers love. But instead he came off as a total wanker. /rant The discussions on here about Kévin are so funny because who would have thought a generation of French kids would be named after Dances with Wolves’ Kevin Costner or Macaulay Culkin’s Home Alone character. Would have been more fun if they spelled it the original Irish way, Caoimhín. I assume they didn’t have any space to do so with the tiny ovens they were given. Few things would be more Milwaukee than beer but roasting a chicken on a beer can wasn’t possible either unfortunately.

This show is not good. I am surprised how very much not good it was. It had so many things I enjoy in a show, splashes of Loki and Sliders, codependent and oddball friends and more. But instead the whole thing falls into the “I’m 14 and this is deep” category of shows. There are no stakes, no tension, and no worthwhile characters. Everyone is one-dimensional, including Davey and Jonesy, who learn no lessons or grow in any way by the final episode. They remain annoying the entire series, so much so you end up wishing they got sent to Dimension X in the first place and saved everyone some time.

The right team won. It ticked all the boxes. In my opinion, Domnall saved Hannah, though. Her design was circles, circles and more circles. Matt’s ceiling lighting idea sounded good but the end result was a little amateurish to me. I was not as impressed as Sophie at construction paper leaves. The fabric, wallpaper, and artwork all being homemade by Domnall does make me wonder how much you can make at home and bring in. He spent hours and hours creating most of the room outside of the days allotted. The right person went home. The wall colors had nothing to do with nature or animals, the floor was cheap vinyl and unfinished looking otherwise, and there was no evidence she was against the boat that she happily carried in and got into laughing. It is strange she did not use any blue on the floor to indicate the river story, but she was laser focused on a bright, and unnatural especially for a zoo room about conserving wildlife, color aesthetic. I am surprised Jess made such a small circle bench and boring benches against the wall. And that she tried to do it all with no help. Her wave benches could have had an impact if she let people help her more. Madagascar was so childish. It was like a muppet theatre where kids graffitied the walls with marker. How durable are those buttons? And how annoying are they going to be once a presentation starts or kids are at the tables working on something. None of it felt well thought out. But of the three rooms, Madagascar had by far the best outdoor signage.

I keep waiting for the judges to show their personalities. It feels like being stuck making small-talk at a networking event. My heart broke for Jackie. Her artistic skill as seen in the earlier episodes was amazing. Thomas and Keifer need to host their own show. On any topic. I just love their friendship and how well Thomas describes what he is doing, like he is narrating an educational program.

Ben's Victorian traincar was one of the most amazing designs I have seen on this show. And I also loved Matt's, which is the only one I would want to stay in as a hotel room. The bright yellows and oranges and florals of most of the designs are not conducive to a space made for you to rest. I expected Sheree to go home. Not even having measurements for the builder was disrespectful in my opinion. I wonder about who was next on the list of potential designers and just barely missed out on the life-changing opportunity because the show gave the spot to her instead. Has there ever been someone who took the show as unseriously as she did? Alan's joke of her napping was probably not far off from the truth. The person I actually wanted to go home was Hannah. Who comes on a show for "novice designers" and immediately announces they are a professional interior designer? And then it becomes clear that she has no sense of design! Cutting the walls in half with paint, too many features, etc are all mistakes you would expect from a beginner. I was embarrassed for her as she tried to explain her signature style as "geometric." I hope she takes the judges' comments to heart. I never heard of the job "interior therapist" before. Like paint the walls, add some shelves, and now now your depression is cured? The commode left me speechless. I do not know what to think about Francesca and big top circus stripes. Her room reminded me of Hildy from Trading Spaces. And her clothes reminded me of a clown at a kid's birthday party. I almost expected balloon animals strewn about her final design. I have to say though that most of the designs, even if I didn't particularly like them, were much better than a lot of the designs for rentals in previous series. No one painted all the walls black for one.

For the chess sets, it felt like being able to differentiate the pieces or even play an actual game with them was not relevant to the judging. Like the mountains only being different sizes. So playing a game, you do what, hold up the pieces next to one another to see if it is a knight or bishop? The snails and birds didn’t even fit within the squares of the board. And the mud/rock cartoon characters were so complicated and different to one another they belonged in a vitrine or on a fireplace mantel rather than a game board. Glad I only had to hear the Rogan laugh for his demo for the throwdown. It felt like the host was channeling her “inner 8 year old who just learned a bad word” and got tiresome fast. The judges were certainly quick to use the bucket. I am hoping the judges grow on me soon. They are fine but definitely no Keith Brymer Jones.

Stephen absolutely deserved best potter of the week with his perfectly stacked and well-designed teapot and mugs. The coral teapot was a mess in my opinion, with colors that were not aesthetically pleasing. The whole thing was a box with a load of random things stuck on it. And the lid of looked ill-fitting and awkward. Not to mention the pineapple slices as the design on the mugs. My opinion of Donna has really gone down over the weeks. After learning that she went to uni for ceramics and has been an art teacher for two decades, I am not nearly as impressed compared to the other artists. This week stood out as a low point for her in my opinion. But Keith loves her, and that is what matters for the show. Please , can someone tell Sophie to keep her hair behind her shoulders or tie it up. Watching her lean over the wheel with that dangling ponytail almost gave me a coronary. Her design was not anything special and didn’t really fit the brief. It was a teapot and mugs with an octopus and tentacles stuck on them. The camper deserved to go. Keith and Rich warned Cadi about the flat sides and she didn’t listen. It was funny especially because the photo of her camper van had more curves and shape than the teapot. Keith was very nice when he commented on the spout. He has always been more kind in his critiques to the women on the show. The bellydancer was a lot of fun as was the snake despite its nonfunctional spout design.

Donna continues to amaze. Her talent and artistic ability is maybe the best I’ve seen on this show. I think Jan is also one of the best this series for building and decorating the main makes. I hate to say it but I am relieved Shani is finally gone. It was like watching Rowan on the latest GBBO. You can only see someone stressed and struggling for so long on a show. Shani could have gone any episode thus far and it would have made the show much more relaxing to watch. It reminds me of my aunt as she got older and couldn’t remember people’s names. She called everyone “Love”.

I wish all reality competitions had such kind and supportive participants as this and GBBO. I still miss Claudia Winkleman as the host? I did not mind Siobhan last year, but after watching her on the celebrity christmas special, my tolerance is wearing thin. And the opening skit was not entertaining at all. A very talented group of potters this year. The gravy ship was hilarious. Shani knew it was massive but made it anyway? Funny two potters went with dog paw game night theme, one far more successfully. The details on Daniel’s were amazing and seemed under appreciated by Keith. I don’t think the addition of the chicken foot was needed to be honest because the lid was amazing without it. Sophie’s daffodil was inadvertently hilarious. The trumpet was more of a sad trombone. Looking forward to the rest of the series and Keith crying. He’s the best.

Finished watching series 3. Again by the first episode the judges made it obvious who their favorites were. As the episodes went by, their bias became more and more blatant. Like telling Tiff nothing was wonky in her kitchen while the camera zoomed in on legs of the stools that didn't all touch the floor. And how they did not put the doll in everyone’s rooms during judging because the scale of their faves were sometimes laughably off. There was no mystery from episode one who would be going home the first few episodes. Bad time management, too many ideas, and in one contestant’s case not bothering to measure things which boggles the mind. I quickly tired of Elliot’s “rust”. He used it in every room. Why would working laboratory equipment for his “hobby” be rusty? And how does a flying machine work when rust coats the hub of the propeller? His idea was original and fun but he used the same techniques over and over. When he repeated things in every room the judges could not stop raving over it, but then they called Lance out for that exact thing. I will give Elliot credit for having a concept that required no molding or wall features or other choices that other contestants got dinged for, like poor Mike. And despite all my complaining about him, Elliot fulfilled the brief the best and had the most intriguing story of the final three. As for the final designs, I preferred how Lance put the exterior features all the way around his mikiwan and on top of it. After seeing that, it felt strange to see the other two only had a massive yard on one side. I saw Lance once made a miniature of Stephen King’s It house from the movie and of the Muppet theatre as well. I cannot get over the level of talent of the people on this show.