floridamom

Jill's "I'm in love with someone I've never met" statement has pre-teen in love with her tv teen idol written all over it. At 13 yrs old, if my teen idol had asked me to run away with him and get married, would I have gone? Heck, YEAH... my bedroom was "wallpapered" with pics from Tiger Beat and 16 Magazine of him. It's so sad that these girls are not acting like 20somethings at all.

Thank you, Marigny. Your comment is appreciated by me. I speak from personal experience on that one. The Duggars are scared to death...of everything... and as a result, their molds come in pink or blue, fit perfectly with NO wiggle room. Has anyone read the new post by JB and Michelle on "crisis of faith'? how would they react if any of their children left the church? Of course, Michelle, the woooonderful speaker, went on this diatribe about needing God and how wonderful God is, etc., (forgive me Lord for seeming disrespectful to You), but my point is that they responded as if their children were to abandon belief in God altogether. I believe the interviewer asked them the question with a less extreme intent. Perhaps the kids would choose to live a more mainstream life, not just like them. We saw the "pray for them" cliche', of course. But they didn't say if they would still be welcomed at their dining room table or not.. I'd still like to know the answer to that one. They responded in the extreme because that is what they are in everything. I would think that Derrick is better suited for Jana. He is 25, she, 24; quiet, reserved, and would love a 9-5 husband, in the real world with a nice little home to care for and maybe he'd draw her out a little, with a TV, and out of the house experiences..Ben, I believe , at this time in his life,, would be suited for (dare I say it?) JoyAnna,, who is 16. They can kick this around for a few years, and maybe really get to know one another and marry when Joy is 18. I don't know what JB is thinking here.

These people think keeping your "heart frozen on ice" is the way to go through life until you get yourself a husband. Well, I can tell you that a used heart is much better than a pristine, never-used, cold as ice one! A heart that has given pieces away regenerates bigger, better, stronger than before rather than one that has been untouched. There is an air of elitism, "I always do the right thing", why haven't you, but in truth that unused heart has never been challenged. It is easy to always do right when you have never been called to do anything before. I'll go with the person who has "loved and lost" every time before I'll go with the Dudley DoRights out there. Smug superiority, that's all it brings.

Maybe I missed something here. We know Jana loved music, and now must patrol Jill as doula, Jill likes midwifery and Jinger likes photography. but what does Jessa like? If she isn't "too into" housewife work and cooking, what does she do other than pack for the family? She doesn't seem like the type underneath it all who would want to do those mundane things, and lose her figure popping baby after baby out. Ben is a nervous/scared kid, so why would he be pursuing anyone in a courtship at this time in his life? I feel bad for him as he has been somewhat of a hostage by his parents too while growing up, which, he isn't done yet with either.. I'm sure JB will step in and set them up with a pre fab house on his property. What kind of "leave and cleave" is that? At least old Joshy tried to act grown up when pursuing Anna. He had a business that was dad's, I think, and a house that is Grandma's to live in and I can't see Joshy paying rent to dear old Granny. This poor boy needs to run and run far from being pressured into this ridiculuous situation. Does anyone else notice how nervous he is? They are emotional opposites, and they don't attract when married; they clash.. Jessa is cold and insensitive and he is eager to please...He'ss be yelping at her heels for years to come. Once again, what interests does Jessa have? I think she'll be bored to death stuck at home with no money. She is the one who needs the "big bucks guy" to keep her in WalMart curling irons. Can't say that I like her very much. My heart goes out to Jana and Jinger. They would be far more deserving of a really nice guy to swoop them out of there. I hope Jana marries "mega money" and has a housekeeper; she surely has earned one.

I am a mother of sons and they are in their mid 20s. No way are my kids ready for marriage right now. It's so utterly obvious to this old mom that Ben is in no position to marry anyone. I think it inconceivable that both of Ben's parents would use him like this to advance their own agendas, if that were the case. Just more evidence showing what terrible parents this fundamental group produces. I just don't buy Jessa and Ben. I suspect it was a decoy to deter attention from Jill and her guy. After all, no one was looking at her during this time; all eyes were on Jessa. She really doesn't care (romantically) for this young man. You know, strangely enough, I like Ben. I think he's an inexperienced boy unfortunately under the influence of his fundamental parents. At least he is in a classroom going to college. It's more than I can say for JimBoob and Queen Michelle's kids.

Hey, why don't the kids play outside anymore?

After seeing the premiere episode, I actually like Ben. He isn't a professional actor and he is very young. I think he's trying his best to speak on camera and he's trying not to be nervous with cameras filming his every move. Having said that, I just don't understand how his parents can think that their son is ready to marry anyone at this time in his life. He is 19yrs old, a college freshman, which means he graduated from HIGH SCHOOL last spring!! He's still so young. How can this kid be prepared to support himself let alone a wife and VERY shortly after that, babies...It's not a fault of his, it's the stage of life that this young man is in right now. He has 3 more years of college ( I don't know what he's studying). I'd like to know what his major is and what he aspires to become with a college degree, but in marrying now, he will be unlikely to complete his education. His windshield repair job it great for him now and shows that he's not lazy, like Jessa. Run, Ben, Run and prepare yourself for your career first. Jessa doesn't really care. She's not worth interfering with his future goals. I just don't think she cares very much and probably will have a messy house and give this kid heat and serve meals all the while remaining cold and distant to her husband who is a young boy eager to please, say nice things and craves affection. He won't get it from her. Well, the Duggars are extreme in all they do and all they don't do, so maybe she will dutifully perform her marital obligation with no warmth or love, or she will be heck in the bedroom! Has anyone noticed in the restaurant scene with Ben's parents and Jessa how Ben's mother was staring adoringly at Jessa, as if she was in awe of her celebrity. How ridiculuous. I hope that Ben hasn't been "encouraged" and told by his parents that God put it on their hearts that he should court Jessa at this time. It just doesn't make sense to me that parents who are adults would think this is a good idea right now in their son's life. They are well aware that fundies like the Duggars do not court for more than a few months m/l and marriage is usually within the year. This kid needs time to grow up as any 19yr old boy needs. I was glad also that this family left Michelle home to babysit. KARMA!!!!!Now she knows a bit of how Jana feels. I wonder what Michelle was thinking when she met Ben's relatives: a. in sundresses with spaghetti straps, pants, and normal clothes. She looked so short and dumpy with her too long hair and too long of a skirt. I think Ben is doing the best he can in a stressful situation and I feel sorry for this kid, who probably is conditioned to listen to everything his parents tell him to do and I think his Mom suggested the match. Why are JimBob's daughters too good or too holy to have an actual job outside the home in the real world? He accepts the services of female employees at restaurants, stores and doctor's offices. His daughters would never be able to work at any job that didn't keep them within their religious/cult beliefs. How hypocritical of him. How sad for his daughters.

My brains are going to explode!! Did y'all see the video of Jill's "boyfriend"? Finally admitted to... Just can't believe that JimBob wants his sons-in-law to be his boyfriends first!! There is something quite wrong with that guy. There is no way that real, true love is realized between two people who have never met in person or spent any time together...alone. Jill and Jessa are so "first crush" infatuated, like 13 year old girls, so quite obvious to this old lady. Their own parents don't know the difference. How can they justify listening in on conversations via SKYPE! It is utterly intrusive. You can see how uncomfortable Jill is with the whole thing. they marry off child/girls who are 20 something years old. When these girls start to court, there really is no alternative but to end up"wallking down the aisle". That is what they are totally trained for. I guess there goes Jill's midwifery goals.. not that she is an actual health professional. JB lets his daughters "think about" or "consider" dallying in some make believe work to keep them busy until that ring is on their finger. Hurry up Jana!!! I hope someone really pulls the wool over JimBob's eyes, marries Jana and truly loves her and sets her free to actually live in the world, wear pants and shorts, pursue her music and go out to dinner where they use actual china... Way to Go, Suz at Large!!!! Here, here, well said. I couldn't agree with your articulate statements more. By the way, Suz at Large, I recommend you copy and send your insightful, educated statements to JimBob himself and dare him to respond. (other than that he will pray for you), Forgive me God, for that one. Go

Hey there! Love reading the points of view brought up here. I watch because I can't believe how nuts these people are and think we should be all like them. One of the overlooked Jslaves, is Grandma Duggar. I can't believe for one minute that this lady would have aspired to still be washing her son's dirty underwear, never mind her daughter-in-law's too and ALL the kids underpants. (Oops, was that NIKE?) As sexually active as JB and Michelle are and advertise to be, I wouldn't want to touch their underthings with a ten foot pole! Why would Mary Duggar want to? She should be interviewed about these things. The Duggars proclaim to be very much in afterlife belief, and have now given "J'Caleb" an identity and of course, Jubilee one too, full blown funeral and all. I am in no way reducing the emotional suffering of miscarriage here, but they fail to include these two in their quiver. They have 21 children, 19 on earth and 2 in heaven. Why haven't they stopped "trying' for #20 when they already have reached and surpassed that number? They pull out those two from the drawer when it's convenient to advertise them They abuse the memory of those 2 children as much as they abuse the ones on earth... This courting thing is a commitment for marriage for the guy before he's even out of the gate. I understand that once it begins, only the girl can call it off! So, a guy has to be ready with the ring and all before he asks her father for permission to know her. What is HE doesn't like so much what he finds in HER? Doesn't sound like a great deal for the guy at all. No wonder these girls don't have them breaking down the door; even with JB's money. I'm sure it's all his and the girls get nothing; after all, the guy has to pay her way through life forever..As a mother of sons, I'd never want my sons to be stuck like that. Any parent with sense in their heads wouldn't want it either. Nor, come to think of it, would parents of a daughter want her to be stuck with a dud or an abuser all of her life.. What is the dad approved groom turns out not to be the brightest bulb in the chandelier? It's possible that the wife could have stronger decision making skills in some areas instead of her husband? What does this wife have to do? Follow this idiot's stupid decisions? Pray to God for him to change his mind on his own? This courting joke is nonsense. It didn't work 150 years ago and it doesn't work now. They are so black and white in everything. Either court in this antiquated way or you are a slut sleeping around with any pair of pants that comes along. They show their ignorance with this belief and believe that no one can live a good Godly life living differently than they do. Ok, I've spouted off enough here, so, so much to vent... thanks guys for reading all of this. I'll look forward to your comments now..

I still can't understand why Daddy Dearest has approved a 19 year old kid to court Jessa, who is 22? If BennyBoy was 22 and Jessa 19, then I could see it. Why would JB marry off Jessa to a little boy? Also, just what is this "heart for the ministry" thing? Does Ben want to be an ordained Baptist Minister? If you notice, they don't ever go into specifics and explain what they say. They hide a lot under their skirts... or polo shirts if you ask me. What would Queen Michelle do without head cook/housekeeper/babysitter Jana? That poor young lady has lost the spark in her eyes. I would bet that it's Michelle who "encouraged" her woooonderfulll husband, JB, not to approve any suitors for Jana at this time; because SHE needs Jana. How awful of a mother to do that to her own daughter. Those girls each play a scripted role, IMO, Jana the quiet one, Jessa, the serious one, Jill the happy one, and Jinger the expressive artist. In reality, they can't pursue any of their aspirations. Why would they? Once they are married, they'll start pregnancy testing the day after the wedding and so long career!!!! It's a waste of time for them. TLC really needs to get real and show this family for what they really are. The Duggars proclaim to be Christians, truthful and Godly, so they should come clean about the origins of their lifestyle and child "trainin' up". Thanks, hopefully, I sent this correctly, as I'm techno-challenged....but still trying...

Hello everyone, I'm floridamom. I have been reading y'all on the other site and I have enjoyed your commentary very much. I'm not very computer savvy, so I couldn't log into it. I finally have done it! I'm looking forward to some great observations from you guys. So glad to join you folks... first time for me!