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David T. Cole

Quotable Quotes, Snappy Quips, and Zingers

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Mac: Bull has got himself a girlfriend.

Dan: Really? Animal, mineral or vegetable?

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Prosecuting a case where some Star Trek conventioneers get dragged into Night Court for a fight between "old Trekkies and new":

 

Dan:  "Yes, sir they were involved in a brawl that broke out at their convention during a seminar on the role of 'Androids on Starfleet Command vehicles'".

{Dan turns to look at Trekkies with disgust}

Dan: "Don't you guys ever get loaded and hire a stripper?"

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The ep whereHarry had bet some rich guy that he could clear a certain number of cases that night, but came up short, so he bet the guy he could beat him in arm wrestling. When he was losing, Christine got in the guy's line of sight and flashed her breasts at him, causing him to lose. Afterwards, Harry was talking to her, and he said:

"...And I knew that he knew that he was in the presence of greatness."

Christine smiles and says, "Thanks!" and then walks off, leaving Harry confused.

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Christine: Now this guy, he's a family man. Do you have to charge him with indecent exposure?

Dan: A guy shows up at a public beach wearing nothing but a hot dog bun and relish, what am I supposed to charge him with? 

Christine: Vending without a license?

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