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Best Quotes: "Sometimes Self-Deception Can Be Therapeutic."


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If anyone has better suggestions for a subtitle for this thread post them here and we can let the mods know once we choose a new one!

Quotes from S04.E17: Addiction:

Nolan: Javier, my wannabe bestie, this is Emily, my actual bestie.

Stevie: Another ex-Mrs. Grayson. I'd say welcome to the club, but I don't care much for the other member.

Aiden: I'm not Nolan. You can't just give me the cold shoulder and expect me to come running to save you the next day.

Edited by ElectricBoogaloo
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(edited)

Aidan: You don't kidnap somebody halfway, Nolan.

 

Nolan: Easy, Judge Judy. You were the one that sent Conrad an ear. I mean, seriously, do you and Aidan flip a coin for who runs the creepiest errand?

 

Conrad: Would you put your contempt aside and pay attention?

 

Emily: You sound just like your mother - completely insane.

 

Conrad: Authorities will be arriving any minute.
Victoria: Then I won't waste my energy throwing you out.

Edited by ElectricBoogaloo
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Nolan: There won't be any poisonings?

Emily: Afraid not.

Nolan: No arrests or blackmailings?

Emily: Nope.

Nolan: No takedowns whatsoever?

 

Ben: I was raised by a single dad. A lot of grilled cheese for breakfast, pancakes for dinner.

 

Emily: Nolan was wrong. You don't look anything like a stripper.

 

Louise: I'm Louise, Louise Ellis.

Victoria: Victoria Grayson.

Louise: As in Conrad Grayson?

Victoria: Mmm hmm.

Louise: I'm sorry for your loss.

Victoria: I'm not!

 

Guy: I've wanted one of these ever since I saw Goldfinger as a kid. So why are you letting her go?

Daniel: I don't know. I guess I realized some things in life are more important than pretending to be James Bond.

 

Margaux: I was curious to see how you would erase Victoria from here. Thoroughly it seems.

 

Ben: I feel like I died and went to Billy Joel's house.

 

Nolan: Slow down, po po Porter.

 

Nolan: [Gideon]'s business model is two parts Madoff, one part Manson.

 

Nolan: [Charlotte]'s not the most stable little pony.

 

Nolan: I'm afraid I've succumbed to idle gossip.

 

Emily: I empathized with Nancy. I wanted to protect her from feeling the pain that I felt, becoming like me. She was never like me. No one is.

Nolan: You're a snowflake, a unique bloodthirsty snowflake.

  • Love 2
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Margaux: Who has to hire three COOs in six months? I'm starting to look like an idiot.

 

Victoria: I just came back from three different banks. Every account that can be traced back to me, onshore or offshore, has either been frozen or seized by the government.

Daniel: That sounds about right.

Victoria: I need access to any assets or funds you may have hidden.

Daniel: What assets or runds? What are you talking about?
Victoria: You are the patriarch of this family now. That's what the Grayson men do. How do you not put money aside to prepare for a rainy day?

Daniel: Because preparing for a rainy day is the exact behavior that brought on a damn monsoon six months ago.

 

Victoria: All you need to know is that I'm going to make this family whole again.

Daniel: Well, good luck with that. [gives the Fonzie double thumbs up] Oh, since you care so much, you might want to know that Charlotte's hanging out with drug dealers, shoving God knows what up her nose and she almost took a leap off the Maison Hotel. That's the update. Let's do this again in another six months.

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Emily: It's my move now.

Nolan: No no no. No more moves. I say we tag out. Let's call the police.

Emily: The police? No!

Nolan: Let's at least call Jack. He's police adjacent.

 

Nolan: Maybe little arson Annie was behind this.

 

Nolan: You do know that that hoodie is not a bulletproof vest.

 

Charlotte: The Grayson mantra: lie and deny.

 

Ben: First the fire and now this. What did she do? Walk under a ladder and break mirror?

 

Louise: Nothing can fix the devil.

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[Discussing Daniel and Margaux's relationship] Nolan: So what do we call them? MaNiel? DanGaux?

Emily: Trouble

 

Nolan: Look at you! Solving conflict without a red sharpie!

 

Nolan: Why the Aiden face? This is good news.

 

Nolan: Rule number 17, no fish for breakfast. Rule number 18, no killing on the premises. Rule to be disregarded if my life is in danger. Ah, most importantly, 19. Always give a heads up call before coming home. I am on the rebound, so, bitch, don't kill my vibe. [03x08]

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Nolan: What good is an insomniac bestie if not for midnight housecalls? How can I be of service?

Emily: I want you to hack into the police file on Conrad's murder.

Nolan: Because you need some light reading?

 

Nolan: You think your father's lying about the silo and your first move is a B&E?

 

Daniel: Only you could frame lying to me as a kindness.

 

Nolan: This is the bank's master key courtesy of your 3D printer and my 5D intellect.

 

Nolan: Time to find another batcave.

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Nolan: Don't cry for me, Sargentina.

I loved that line.  And with the emphasis Nolan placed on the words I heard "Sergeant Tina" which struck me as even funnier.

Edited by RachelKM
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(edited)

Jack: There's a difference between retiring and getting banned.

 

Nolan: Morning, Lucy.

Louise: Why, Ethel, you look like your hangover is as wicked as mine.

 

Louise: You never forget your first mental institution!

 

Margaux: You're just like your father and mine. You do what you please and ask for forgiveness later.

 

David: I owe you an apology.

Nolan: You owe me a reputation, a cell phone, and about 23,000 Twitter followers.

 

Victoria: This is about us, about how you can lie to me yet demand absolute honesty. Why do you ask me to prove myself to you again and again?

David: I never asked you to prove anything to me.

Victoria: You ask me every time you throw my trust issues in my face. You did it this morning and you did it twenty years ago.

David: I sat ten years in jail alone. What were you proving then? Or did you not know that I was innocent?
Victoria: Of course I knew.

David: Where the hell were you?

 

Nolan: Nanotech is the new black.

 

Emily: I'm really not in the mood to be doing whatever it is we've been doing lately.

Daniel: What? Having honest conversations probably for the first time ever? Yeah, that sucks. You know, I'm starting to realize why we didn't work. We're the same person. We're stubborn as hell and we use people without giving a damn about who gets hurt in the process.

 

Margaux: This is over.

Daniel: Why do you get to decide that?

Edited by ElectricBoogaloo
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(edited)

Emily: Hold my hand. Don't let go. [wrenches her dislocated shoulder back into position]

 

Police chief: Is that your van parked outside?

David: Yeah, this is my house. Why?

Police chief: You left the keys in the rear door.

David: Safe neighborhood.

Police chief: Doesn't seem like it lately.

 

Nolan: I don't know if it's abject fear but I have been crazy productive!

 

Louise: I think I'll bake something for [Victoria] before my Xanax wears off.

 

David: Victoria's going to stay here for now

Emily: Are you out of your mind?

 

Police chief: Open the back of the van.

David: I don't think so. You don't have cause.

Police chief: My cause is that you're a sketchy son of a bitch.

 

Louise: I was taught to deflect grief with baked goods and comfort food.

 

Nolan: You are one bad ass travel agent, Mr. Clarke.

 

Emily: Where's your lady friend?

 

Ben: Never get involved with a woman who owns more handcuffs than you.

Edited by ElectricBoogaloo
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Emily: I talked [David] out of [killing Victoria].

Nolan: What is the world coming to?

 

Emily: Did you know that Louise was institutionalized?

Nolan: At Claremont? A place that you know full well has a history of confining sane people against their will. I actually think it's in their brochure.

 

Nolan: There was a little snafu in the steam room. She locked Margaux inside. Allegedly.

Emily: What?!

Nolan: Allegedly!

 

David: I appreciate that after everything, you still believe in the justice system, Jack.

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Victoria: Edward and I always had a special bond. Even when Conrad and I divorced, Edward reached out to assure me I still had a place in his heart and in his will.

 

Louise: Buongiorno, mi amoretto.

Nolan: Are we Italian now?

 

Louise: Pack a bag. Or just a credit card.

 

Simone: I can't lose my job over this.

Nolan: I'll get you a new one even if that means I have to start a magazine.

 

Louise: Il tuo culo sembra bueno in quei pantalones. That means your butt looks good in those pants.

[it should actually be buono, not bueno, but I'm assuming this error is due to Louise not knowing Italian]

 

Victoria: Who the hell are Ralph and Alice?

Lawyer: Edward Grayson's corgis.

Victoria: I'm sorry, what is that word?

Lawyer: You're getting his dogs. It says here they're being flown in from Scottsdale next week - first class.

Victoria: That's it? There has to be some mistake.

Lawyer: Oh, wait. You're right. You're also getting their Burberry dog beds.

 

Lyman: My apologies, I couldn't help but overhear.

Victoria: No one ever means that.

Lyman: Lyman Ellis - future Congressman, current lawyer, and the man who will take on your case.

 

Margaux: I can't quite fathom how much my life will change, not just emotionally but practically. When was the last time you were able to do something spontaneous?

Jack: The other night, I got out of bed and made myself a grilled cheese sandwich. No planning, I just did it.

 

Nolan: We do good things for people who deserve it and bad things to those who don't.

Louise: And what are you on today? A mission of mercy or malice?

Nolan: How does merciful malice suit you?

Louise: Like a La Perla!

 

Nolan: Mission Em-possible is a go!

 

FBI: Stop right there!
Louise: Oh my goodness! This isn't Soul Cycle?

Margaux: Louise?

FBI: You know her?

Louise: Gosh darn it, I could have sworn Jack said the gym was on the eighth floor.

Margaux: Jack sent you here?

Louise: Or was it Eighth Avenue? You know, I am so terrible with directions. I'm so sorry to interrupt.

 

Natalie: I loved [Edward].

Victoria: What exactly did you love most? The fact that he was worth millions or that he was on death's doorstep? I think it was both.

 

Victoria: I've known women like you. In fact, I've been accused of being a woman like you.

 

Natalie: When I started working for Teddy, my life was falling apart. I was in a horrible marriage.

Victoria: Well, sure. You were poor.

 

Natalie: If giving you his entire estate would bring him back, I would.

Victoria: Well, why don't you try? You never know.

 

Emily: Trying to get me on a B&E. Is that the best you could do? You should have brought your FBI pals up here because I both broke and entered. Nice try though.

Margaux: I don't know what you're talking about.

Emily: A word of advice - if you're going to keep coming at me, you're going to have to be a hell of a lot smarter.

Margaux: You think you're invincible.

Emily: Not invincible. Just better.

Margaux: I will find your weak spot.

Emily: Let me save you the trouble. I don't have one.

 

Victoria: Talking like a lawyer but thinking like a politician.

Lyman: I truly am the best of both worlds. And in my short time here, I can see that honesty does not get you very far so who am I to break with tradition?

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David: If it helps at all, [Natalie] despises Victoria.

Amanda: [Natalie]'s still a Grayson.

David: She's a Grayson but only in name.

 

Amanda: [David] barely knows [Natalie].

Jack: Isn't that the point of dating? To get to know someone?

 

Nolan: Try not to drool on the hologram.

 

Emily: You get lost?

Ben: Feeding lies to Margaux took a little bit longer than I expected.

Nolan: Betrayal - you always gotta give yourself an extra fifteen minutes.

 

Natalie: I asked for navy blue napkins, not midnight blue!

 

Natalie: Lydia Davis was a vile whore. Conrad Grayson loved me. He promised me everything when he died.

David: You aren't the first girl he seduced with his estate but you might be the most deluded.

 

Victoria: I guess there's a silver lining to not killing me after all.

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Louise: Someone has to lighten the mood around here. You're about as depressing as a Yankee groom at a Southern wedding.

Margaux: You tried to kill me, you lunatic!

 

Nolan: That's my infinity box.

 

Nolan: Things have gotten Harry, as in S. Truman.

 

Nolan: [Margaux] knows that we don't have enough time to pull off an Emily's Eleven.

 

Nolan: Louise, you are in over your head and you picked the wrong side. Oh and while you were trying to record a confession on your phone right now, I was running an app that reset it to factory settings. Like I said - you, head, over.

 

Nolan: Do you want another drink? Cause I want twelve.

Jack: Party didn't go like you planned?

Nolan: Why do we even still throw them? No, seriously. No learning curve.

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Nolan: Crazy Capote is back! I thought you had exiled him to the Maldives. Can't anybody follow a simple revenge plan? Oh, right, you didn't when you revealed yourself as Amanda.

 

Mason: Yes, I heard your house went up in flames. Tragic, gee. I wonder how that feels.

 

Jack: I was called back for questioning. Apparently when you leave town the night someone you openly hate is killed, it looks a little suspicious.

 

Amanda: That bitch set me up!

  • Love 2
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