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S03.E09: But I Don't Even Have a Dress...

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I just... *sigh*

Look I know the trial couldn't be the last two episodes (It should have been since it was their big plot). I know they needed Raelle to have the trial for their plot. I've already gone on about how the plot should have been, you know, fighting with the actual armies all three sides have. But they literally THREW AWAY their trial plot after three minutes. I just... I don't think I've ever watched a show and felt so personally attacked as a writer. This isn't rocket science. Their plot was never going to work because of Taylor's car crash, but they forced it anyway, and I just want to scream, but that's dumb. Why did they not rework it better? They gathered all those people for the different army shots, why not use them for actual plot purpose? I think any fans would have liked action happening, even if it wasn't related to the unit, rather than watch people who are supposed to be capable and the best, fumbling around with the idiot stick every other episode.

Why didn't we see the Camarilla take Garrett at Fort Salem, or anyone for that matter? (Was that Garret, what's his name? I'm pretty sure Garrett is a dead dude from season 1.) Why didn't we see the interrogations? Honestly the Camarilla occupying Fort Salem always came off as doofuses. Seeing them mistreating witches would have upped the tension, and at the very least reminded me of what that man's name was. I felt bad that Tally didn't have anyone for the ending, but really show? Giving her that guy? Who looked so uncomfortable, I half thought he was going to be Hearst, of course I also thought Nicte could be Hearst. I mean that would have been a cool twist. And a call back to the last Bellweather wedding getting wrecked by the Camarilla.

Which leads me to the my other gripe. I can buy Hearst breaking the other president out of prison, we know their people are all over the government, so of course they're in law enforcement too. But Fort Salem had what, a skeleton crew working? Of course Hearst has to poison the mother/mycellium. Of course there's no one on base, even though the Cession is no longer under occupation. Of course there's no squad guarding the one place they KNOW that Hearst and the Camarilla would die to get access to. They know the Camarilla know a crap-ton of their moves and info about their base, but sure, let's have it be empty for no reason that makes sense. I mean it's not like that's what the Camarilla have been trying to do all season or anything. And what about the rest of the country? What was their reaction to the trial, then President Wade taking back over? Not worth mentioning? Are people still upset? Or are we just supposed to assume that it's like the U.S. right now? 

It's not that I couldn't like their plot. I can enjoy storylines if they're done right, even if I wouldn't have personally chosen that path. I have watched shows with terrible writing just because they invest time in their characters feelings/and or growth. They knew they were being cancelled. They knew they were going to have to sacrifice lore and backstory. And they knew they had to wrap up Nicte and the Camarilla. And they could have done it, but they didn't. I think there's been three episodes that moved the plot along. Three out of nine. You didn't have Taylor, fine focus on who you do have.  You had The Army, you had the Camarilla Army, you had a Cession Army-  you had Fort Salem being occupied, and apparently people being tortured, show it! You had Nicte, and literally did nothing with that plot. Or show us the Cession welcoming the unit. Have them meet up with the Council and "strategize" while showing us the weirdo lady was working with the Camarilla. How? Who was her contact? Hearst? He got into the Cession pretty easily. What's the plot there? Apparently his sister got all the mining properties from their parents, did he use his sister's contacts to meet up with weirdo lady Council member? Or same thing, but add a bit of lore that Hearst's family knows all about that particular nation's grievances about the mining territories since they've heard it for years. Wow look at that, literally the time it took me (20 mins so far) to write this post I found backstory and gave them a couple episodes worth of things to shoot without Taylor. Instead we got half thought out plots, and twists that were not twists, but rather just the follow up to something from two or three episodes ago.

Now angry, writer viewer aside, I did enjoy the main character parts that we got in this episode. Except Anacostia, I don't believe that she would have left the mycellium or Fort Salem unguarded. Did not enjoy being re-introduced to a character I vaguely recall, but cannot name. Or his awkwardness, or Nicte's awkwardness. Or watching Izadora die, and not use her telepathy/link whatever it was, to tell someone on the base or Petra what was happening. Is the mind thing only for witches in the general vicinity? Petra used it for a large group of people out at Fort Salem. And Alder... what the eff, she literally teleported in one episode, why was she trapped in a mountain? Does she literally have no powers if she can't reach the mycellium? That might have been an important thing to- oh wait, we saw her scream-fling Tally away last episode, so nope, she had power. They just needed to get Khalida back into play since they forgot about her/weren't using her to tease another twist.

Okay, so I enjoyed about four main characters and disliked two main characters and several side characters. (As an aside, I don't usually notice clothes, but I like Raelle's first outfit better than the one she got married in.) I will just be turning my brain off for the next episode, whatever they show us, fine, don't care, I'm watching to see who lives and dies, and who gets an actual happy ending. Love all the actors on this show, and I still love the show despite this dumpster fire of a season, and I'm just gonna forget as much of this season as possible with the exception of the character moments.

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How much do they plan on jamming into the final episode? They really could have handled this so much better, but then, if they had handled it better since the beginning, maybe they wouldn't be cancelled.

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I get the impression they meant to stretch a lot of this stuff out over more episodes (and actually show us things like Khalida rescuing Alder and the bats finding M and the president) but Taylor's car accident threw a real wrench into things. They had to hold off on the return to Fort Salem until she could be there for the trial, so they had to tread water for a while. The rewrites were apparently pretty hasty. It sucks, but I'm glad they did that instead of recasting Raelle or killing her off.

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