Mysterious Quotes

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Bess: This is your salad fork, and this is your fork for your main course. Can I interest you in an amuse-bouche?

Ryan: Can you bring something to my wife? She's outside in the car. Uh, and make sure it doesn't have a bun, salt, sauce - basically anything that makes it taste remotely good.

Tiffany: This place isn't the Hamptons. No, it's not the Vineyard. Do you remember that town in Jaws? Yeah, it's like that, but with no shark. At least the shark made things exciting.

George: You had no problem talking about my sex life back in high school. 
Nancy: I never spread any of those rumors.
George: No. You just listened to your friends and smiled.

Nancy: Husband and wife - it's an intimate relationship. I mean, to start, were they even sharing a bed?
George: Well, if she liked her sex like she liked her fish that'd be dry and flavorless so I would say nope.
Ace: Mean. 
George: But relevant.

Nancy: Breaking and entering - just like riding a bike.

Nancy: So, George, you come from a long line of fishermen.
George: Also alcoholics and highly fertile teenage moms. 

George: That's a mariner's good luck charm. 
Nancy: Yeah, I looked it up online. There's not a lot of info.
George: Oh. So you're seeking my expert opinion? Like, I know more than you?
Nancy: In this limited area of ocean-themed jewelry, yes.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

McGinnis: So you're returning to your favorite past time of interfering in my work.

George: Post something on Yelp!
Nancy: What do you want us to post? "We promise our wait staff didn't murder anyone"?

Nancy: If we had someone, say, a forensic chemist who owed you for solving a perfume-related mystery for him in the ninth grade, he could perform the same kind of toxicology test.
Ace: That's a very specific hypothetical.

Nancy: We're not going to let a ghost story stop us from our one chance of gathering this evidence, so we're going to work together to break into the morgue tonight.
George: Who said WE were going to do anything?
Nancy: Well, as fellow suspects you should be highly incentivized to help me.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Nancy: You're not afraid to eat here?
Karen: Our lab tested all the food from the Claw the night Tiffany died. No traces of poison anywhere.
Nancy: Great. I'll post about it on Yelp.

Karen: [Nick]'s got a criminal record. We got the protective order lifted and uncovered a motive.
Nancy: So when they say juvenile records are sealed, I guess they don't mean sealed-sealed.

Carson: Have you been self medicating?

Edited October 24, 2019 by ElectricBoogaloo

[bettername2come]

On 10/24/2019 at 8:14 AM, ElectricBoogaloo said:

Nancy: You're not afraid to eat here?
Karen: Our lab tested all the food from the Claw the night Tiffany died. No traces of poison anywhere.
Nancy: Great. I'll post about it on Yelp.

I'm enjoying the running theme of the Yelp reviews.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Laura: Ace.
Ace: Oh! WOW! This is random!
Laura: Is it? Because you've been tailing me for the last two hours.
Ace: There's a lot of people that look me. You're probably mistaking me for someone else. I was just walking. Scones.
Laura: You're still doing the bumbling stoner thing, huh? Don't worry. It's still cute.

George's mom: You have to toast the bread. Otherwise it gets all soggy.

George's mom: When George was little, she'd pee on the floor and bite you to get your attention.

Carson: I have more important things to concern myself with like paying off medical debt and your bail.
Nancy: How convenient for you to have a daughter and a dead wife to blame your selling out on.

Nancy: You can tell a lot about a person by the way they act at a funeral.

[bettername2come]

George's Mom: It was a two step ritual! How did you forget step 2?!

*

George's Mom: We banished Tiffany from the earthly realm. I'll go summon an Uber. 

Edited November 7, 2019 by bettername2come

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Ace: Ghosts are great for business. It's the murder that kills you.

George: Is this seriously the only bandaid size we have in the first aid kit? I cut my finger. I didn't impale myself on a window pane.

Ace: It's ironic - the restaurant that served Tiffany her last meal being hired to cater a gala in her honor.

Ace: Bad news - Tiffany doesn't like you. Good news - Tiffany's dead.

Victoria: The longer Tiffany's spirit is in George's body, the stronger she'll become. She'll regain her memories-
Nancy: Wait, including memories from the night that she died? Because if that's the case, I can ask her what happened.
Bess: No, that's pretty insensitive, don't you think?
Nancy: I'm trying to solve her murder. How is that insensitive?

Victoria: Drink [the tea].
Bess: Think of your yang.
George: I hate the way that sounds when you say it.

Victoria: Stress allows the spirit to come out. George needs to be relaxed.
George: You know what relaxes me? Money.

Owen: How creepy am I coming off?
Nancy: Only moderately.

Nick: Is this where you apologize for breaking into my place?
Laura: I have impulse control issues.
Ace: She means she's sorry. But she does have impulse control issues.

Nancy: So when you're not busy organizing parties and offering to help cater waiters you don't know and wearing fancy suits, you are in real estate.

Nancy: I thought you would have an electric shovel or something.
Owen: You mean an earth auger? What? That's the name for it.

[bettername2come]

George: I get possessed and now you're haunted? It's not a competition.

*

George: Random locker checks starting next week. 

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Bess: I asked her out so I guess it's up to me to book the restaurant, right? I mean, it's protocol.
George: It's a first date, Bess, not a parliamentary hearing.

Nick: Is Nancy here yet?
George: Right, like your girlfriend's going to ruin her perfect record of never being on time.

Nancy: What do we know about the Velvet Masque?
Nick: Is that a band?
George: No. It's the underground depraved pervy rich people's party for East Coast one percenters.

Nick: Speaking of shady rich people with questionable hobbies.

Nick: I've been following [Owen] around to see what I can find.
Nancy: What did you find?
Nick: That I don't really like following people around.

Owen: Nancy Drew, are you staking out my parking spot?
Nancy: Yes. Got to solve the mystery of how you keep your car so clean.
Owen: So what field are we digging up tonight?
Nancy: No digging, but I did have a couple questions. You and Ryan Hudson. Associates? Business partners? Mortal enemies?
Owen: I'd say all of the above. My turn. Is it possible these questions are coming from a certain mechanic? Good cheekbones, bad at following people around?
Nancy: They are very good cheekbones.
Owen: Is there another question?
Nancy: The Velvet Masque - urban legend or does it exist? And if it exists, where is it? Also, when?
Owen: That's more than one question. 
Nancy: And you didn't answer any of them.

Ryan: Let's just say that I owe money to people that you don't want to owe money to.
Nancy: You're a Hudson. Write a check.
Ryan: I can't. My father cut me off. He hit the roof when he found out about what happened at the fundraiser.
Nancy: You mean making out with your teenaged ex-girlfriend at a fundraiser to honor your dead wife?

Nancy: I kind of know how to break into places. 
Ryan: Yeah, right. What have you ever broken into?
Nancy voiceover: Your house, two weeks ago.

Ace: We should talk icebreakers. Here you want to be honest, but not aggressively so.
Bess: Okay, what does that mean? 
Ace: Maybe don't lead with the fact that you sometimes live in a van. Or your mild kleptomania.

George: I'm just trying to decide if you sending Nancy to Owen showed great confidence or great stupidity.
Nick: Oh, a little of you goes a long way.
George: Oh, I know. That's why I don't fish. Imagine me on a boat.

George: You're helping Ryan Hudson? 
Nancy: Just today. It's important. He thinks somebody's trying to kill him.
George: So go help that person, not the liar/crazy ex-boyfriend in your kitchen who may have killed someone.

Nancy: I made a deal with Ryan to get me into the Velvet Masque.
George: What if the bad thing that happened to [Lucy Sable] was Ryan?
Nick: What's he get out of this deal, huh? A date with an 18 year-old?

Nancy: Are we good?
Nick: Yeah. A hundred percent. 
George: A hundred percent? 
Nick: I rounded up.

Nancy: You took [Lucy Sable] to the Velvet Masque. What happened there? What happened afterwards?
Ryan: Look, all I know is that we had a summer fling, it ended, and then she went off the deep end, somebody murdered her. That's it, end of story.

Bess: I'll never smile again.
George: Bess, how would you like to get a new dress, go to an exclusive rich person's party, and maybe even get the chance to steal something? Hey! There's that smile.

George: First, we need to be less identifiable in a lineup. Let's grab some masks from that creepy sex room.

Celia: You cannot sell those coins. They have to stay in the family.
Ryan: Well, Everett should've thought about that before he kicked me out of the family.

Nancy: Please tell me you're not here to steal the coins.
Nick: We're here to steal the coins.

George: I went overboard disinfecting this mask. My eyes are burning.

Auctioneer: Our first offering: six and a half kilos of powdered South African rhino horn.
George: Gross AND illegal.

Bess: All failure aside, I forgot how exhilarating stealing is.

Owen: So after you all leave, the auction resumes. I win the coins, only to find out that my $1.5 million bought me a handful of quarters, one dime and six pennies.
Nancy: Maybe they're lucky pennies?

Edited November 14, 2019 by ElectricBoogaloo

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Nancy: Denial - Smalltown USA's favorite pastime.

George: Get your hands off my chest.

Nancy: Celia was in Argentina when Lucy was killed.
Ace: Is that a solid alibi?
Nancy: Not for somebody who had the means to hire a hitman.

Nancy: Officer Rawley, it is my understand that a drunk and disorderly arrest requires clear and obvious signs of-
Rawley: Calm down, Nancy. My guys didn't arrest [Victoria].
Victoria: Only because you don't know how to do your job!
Rawley: She walked in here twenty minutes ago and fell asleep on that bench.
George: You're trying to get arrested?

Nancy: What do we know about the runner up?
Ace: Candice Weaver is her name..
Bess: Do we think she still lives in Horseshoe Bay?
George: All Sea Queen runner ups still live in Horseshoe Bay.

Nancy: What can you tell us about the moment of winning runner up?
George: Um, runner up isn't really winning.

Candice: I was merely telling [Lucy] there were rumors about how friendly she'd gotten with the judges and many other influential men.
George: You called her a slut.
Candice: Lucy always liked to party. Poor girl. She was always starved for attention.
George: Attention that you should have been getting?

Laura: After our parents died, Tiffany was put in charge of my inheritance until I turned 25. I wanted the money sooner so I sued her. It's what sisters do - rich sisters.

Bess: It's a face mask. I'm keeping Victoria sober.
Victoria: I can still see the dark terrifying forces descending on our town but at least my pores are unclogging.

Bess: I have been creating my vision board and I zillowed the perfect little cottage for me to move into when I'm ready.
Ace: Six bedrooms? That's very nice. Dibs on the guest house.

Nancy: We've been so focused on the Hudsons-
Bess: Because the look super guilty.

George: If only [Nancy] applied this work ethic to her actual work.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Carson: I didn't kill anyone! Who do you think you're talking to? I'm not some kind of hit man.
Nancy: I have reason to suspect you.
Carson: You suspect everyone of everything.

McGinnis: You'll be calling in a lost soul and if we do this properly, we'll be transported to the outermost layer of the spirit realm.
George: Layers? Kind of like Dante? Hey, I paid attention in English class, okay?
McGinnis: Normally the outer layer of the spirit realm is quiet, but now-
Nancy: We clogged it with dead souls who came for the burial coins during our séance.
Carson: There are many things you and I need to discuss.
McGinnis: Can you fill this with water?
George: Sacred water?
McGinnis: Tap is just fine.

Lisbeth: there's no way I can stay under now. The Hudsons are already asking questions about me seeing you. And now that you all know.
Nick: We'll keep your secret.
Lisbeth: You have a criminal record, and she's got an arraignment pending. I'm not sure I'd trust you guys with a surprise party.

[Cranberry]

McGinnis: Someone in this town has been tampering with the spirit world. We could stand here all day, or one of you can start talking. 
(LONG PAUSE)
Bess: Okay. Dead Lucy - (OTHERS GROAN) - was on Nancy's phone video. We went to a medium to see what she wanted, and then the medium freaked and vanished. 
George: Not like mystical vanished. She just, like, skipped town. 
Bess: Right. Then there was this '70s throwback lady who applied for a job during the Nor'Easter storm. 
George: She also might've been dead, not sure. 
Bess: But Tiffany Hudson's ghost definitely attacked me in a freezer right before she possessed George. 
Nick: And there was the antique coins that opened the door to a crowd full of spirits during the seance.
McGinnis: Seance? 
Nancy: Yeah. I conducted it with a crash course from Victoria. 
George: My mom's a clairvoyant. It's why she's a raging alcoholic. What does this have to do with Ace? 
McGinnis: You all have been reckless. This place is still cluttered with spirits, even worse than the hospital.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Nancy: I let someone punch me in the face last night. It was a favor for a friend.

Owen: Believe it or not, when I first met [Gomber], he seemed like a decent guy. 
Nancy: Wait, you knew him?
Owen: Yeah, he came to my aunt's house at Thanksgiving once. I was visiting from college. 
Nancy: Gawd, you're old. 
Owen: Calm down. I was only a freshman.

Nancy: Moira wants something in return, some sort of reward from Simon. 
George: A reward? Like what? 
Nancy: It's a deal with the devil, so money or fame or her heart's greatest desire.
Nick: Yeah, she wants Gomber out of jail. Maybe that's her heart's desire. She could be in love with him.
Bess: Eww. People need to have higher standards.

Carson: You realize this look says cat burglar.
Nancy: Do I criticize your weekend sweater-vests?
Carson: Commentary rescinded.

Carson: [Gomber] was mentally unwell. What makes you think that there was a supernatural presence involved?
Nancy: What makes you think that there wasn't? Look. This was clearly a ritual.
Carson: Superstitions and rituals are all evidence of human behaviors, not proof of something inhuman.

George: I'm looking for an eight-year-old girl with glasses. What you just described to me is a 25-year-old man. Why don't you go get your eyes checked instead of offering me inaccurate tips?
Nick: But we appreciate your willingness to help.

Carson: You actually believe this ritual is real?
Nancy: Well, lately I've found belief to be a time saver.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Nancy: Either Dead Lucy really wants me to check out what's in here or she's got some pretty strong opinions about my love life.

Carson: Please - let this go.
Nancy: You know me better than that.

Nancy: Mr. Hudson, you need to help my father.
Everett: I have no idea what you're talking about, though I admire your allergy to pleasantries.

Bess: I stole those. Yeah, when I get anxious, I get klepto. Oh, don't arrest me.
Lisbeth: For what? Definitely did not just hear you admit to petty theft.

Bess: I actually keep a running tab on the Marvins at all times. Not in a stalker way. I had to know exactly where they were in order to avoid them before I could present myself. Yeah, I'm, like, a reverse stalker. 
Nancy: When it comes to following people around without their knowledge or consent, I am somewhat of a repeat offender.

Owen: Bess, I thought you'd be getting ready - for lunch with Diana. 
Bess: No. I have exactly one hour, six minutes and fifty two seconds. And I'm British, by the way.

Diana: You can help with the family business, too. Mergers and acquisitions.
Bess: I do like buying things.

Nick: I've I've made mistakes in my life. And the guilt has been so big that I thought it would crush me. That shame doesn't make things better. It just stops you from moving forward.

Ryan: If he wants dirt on Owen, he's got professionals. Why does he call a college dropout?
Nancy: I didn't drop out. I never applied. It's different.

Everett: Thanks for accepting our invitation. It's been too long.
Diana: Has it? And I was thinking it could have been a little bit longer.
Ryan: Oh, man, I wish I still drank.

Everett: You don't think your family has skeletons? Ask your aunt about Mirror Bay. Make no mistake, if you come after us, any destruction will be mutually assured.
Diana: If you're done threatening my nephew, Everett, can you pass the salt? My soup is a bit bland.

Celia: Are you accusing us of murdering 12 people for insurance money?
Diana: Her shocked and offended face. She's been honing it for decades.
Celia: Please. The payout would have been pennies compared to what we would have made had Sebastian lived. His death set back both our companies. Billion-dollar deals fell apart.
Diana: Maybe it was less about business and more about Everett wanting to kill Sebastian for diddling you, Celia.
Ryan: Mother? 
Bess: Oh, my goodness.

Ryan: Wait, hold up, hold up. You're a cop? 
Owen: I think it's called a sting, Ryan.

Owen: Is this about Nick?
Nancy: It's not always about a guy.

Nick: Our party was a hit. You and I make a great team.
George: Well, I did most of the work.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Nancy: Hi, Josh. Uh, I know that my father is in prison for murdering your sister, but I wanted to talk to you about your mother and ask whether or not she may have had homicidal feelings towards Lucy.

Nancy: They just started doing renovations last week so we have two options.
Nick: Air vents or the sewers?
Nancy: Up or down. Your choice.
George: Gross. Okay, be honest - did you go with sewers as a shout out to Jean Valjean?
Nick: Not all my decisions are inspired by French novels, okay? I'd just rather keep my feet on the ground is all.

Nancy: George, you're with me.
George: Great. What's the plan? Please don't say I'm the distraction.
Nancy: You're the distraction.
George: How did you ever have a solo career?

Maître d': Excuse me, sir. Do you have a reservation?
Ace: I have many, but I'm here anyways because I saw Ryan Hudson's car parked out front.

Ace: Did your dad order a jailhouse hit on Carson Drew?
Ryan: My father wouldn't do anything like that.
Ace: Your dad sank his own ship and killed the entire crew. More recently, he had me and my girlfriend run off the road.

Amaya: Nice meeting you.
Bess: Wait, that's it?
Amaya: Unless you want me to dumb down the epic deal I just negotiated.
Bess: I don't need you to bitchsplain the stock market to me.

Carson: Let me get this straight.
Ace: Let's not say it out loud.
Carson: You hacked into the Department of Corrections database, ordered my official transfer to the state prison, impersonated an officer of the law, stole a van-
Ace: Changed lanes without signaling. That one just happened just now.
Carson: And broke me out of prison. I am a prison escapee right now.
Ace: Technically, yes.

Carson: So what's this plan that you have?
Ace: Step one was get you out of immediate danger. Step two is get you someplace safe. Step three is to get proof that your life is in danger. Then we can ask a judge to do something about it.
Carson: This is Route 1. Please tell me you're not just taking me to my house.
Ace: Where would you like to pretend that I'm taking you?

Ace: Your axe is huge, dude.
Carson: My axe? Whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa. - Slow down. 
Ace: I'm going to chop off your cuffs. Come on. I went to archery camp. I got great aim.

Amaya: If you say anything with enough authority, people will believe it.

Sal: You saw Mr. Roeper.
Nancy: Who's Mr. Roeper?
Me: The guy from Three's Company?

Sal: Back in the 1870s, the East Wing of Larkspur Lane was the Roeper mansion. One morning, the milkman found the parents and their three kids lying side by side in this one dark room - the Whisper Box. They'd all died overnight, with smiles on their faces. Authorities couldn't figure out the cause. The townspeople started saying there was something evil that kept coming from that room. Up until about three weeks ago, the Whisper Box was just the place where they stashed the Roepers' old possessions, but when the hauntings started happening, it's where the cockroaches and mold came from. I believe it's the source of the haunting.
George: This is a terrible hospital.

Bess: Do all the rich and powerful people just know each other?
Amaya: Yes. We're all on a text chain.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

George: Damn, having coffee with Nickerson? I thought college was supposed to make you smarter.

Nancy: The Claw does not have patrons, and since when do you and I hug? 
George: Since ninth grade.
Nancy: Since when do you enjoy living in a van? And since when do you-? You're the same - never mind.

Nancy: You and I-
Nick: No, we have never met before.
Nancy: If we've never met, then how do I know about your football injury? Or your manslaughter conviction? Or the $5 million in bearer bonds that Tiffany Hudson gave you? How do I know about that little, you know, bean shaped scar that's under your-
Nick: Oh.

Nancy: Everyone here is perfect and happy and there's no murder and no ghosts and my mom is still alive and you all like me.

Nick: Hey, what took you so long?
Ace: There's no directory for mysterious priests in Horseshoe Bay.

Ace: That is top of the line holy water.

Nancy: This is ridiculous. You know what we need?
Nick: The key?
Nancy: Yeah. Who sold you this shoddy house with one completely impregnable door?
Nick: Ryan Hudson. Terrific guy.
Nancy: Of course. Yeah, okay, let's go meet fake Ryan Hudson.

Ryan: Thinking we'll put a swing set right here. Kids love swing sets.

Nick: Ryan Hudson left us three clues - a sweet angel, farmer's wife, and devoted grandparents. 
Bess: eBay usernames. 
Ace: Country music lyrics. 
Bess: Rejected names of drinks. 
Ace: Wrestling moves.
Bess: Strippers.

Nancy: Thanks for showing up. You guys are really nice figments of my imagination.
Ace: As long as we eventually get to sample whatever you've been on this whole time, I'm in.

Bess: You cannot beat supernatural with science.
George: So what's it going to be? The medicine or the metaphysics?

Bess: What were we like? What was I like?
Nancy: Um, Instagram influencer. And George was a big hugger. Incredibly nice to me.
George: That's weird and gross.

Nick: Who knew owning a restaurant would require actual work?

Edited February 6, 2020 by ElectricBoogaloo

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Bess: Lucy's mom said she worked here. She let herself in with the spare key. Guess they haven't changed that hiding spot since the 90s.

Bess: You look amazing.
Laura: I AM amazing!

George: This is a restaurant and you're turning it into murdertown.

Laura: No, no, no. This is not part of my plan. I'm loop closing, not loop opening.

Laura: You don't have to stay here, Ace. Think about Paris. It'll be so romantic.
Nancy: Hey, you know what is so romantic? Solving a homicide together. With me!

Nancy: Where's Chief McGinnis?
Laura: I need to tell him that I forgive him for being incompetent.
Karen: He's in a deposition all day. More prep for Carson Drew's evidentiary hearing. Can I help you with something?
Nancy: I think you've helped enough, Karen.
Karen: If this is about your father, you put together that evidence. I was simply doing my job.
Nancy: Oh, your job? You mean invading my privacy and stealing my journal and now my dad's going to go to jail for something he didn't do. Because I think I'm doing your job, Karen. I'm trying to find out who actually killed Lucy.

Ace: I'm not going to the library.
Nancy: What? Why?
Ace: I have enemies there.

Ace: Mr. and Mrs. Neff, good to see you. They're regulars.
Nancy: And you, as a character in a Victorian novel, spend all of your free time in the library.

Dominique: You're lucky we store all of security footage for a year.
Ace: Actually, my mom implemented that policy on my suggestion. The first season of Serial really shook me.

Ace: I like to be accurate.
Dominique: Unless it's a capture the flag competition.
Ace: You cheated, Dominique.
Dominique: It's hacking, Ace. There's no cheating in hacking.

George: I can't believe Nick has us doing this. I mean, it's not even an innovative idea. Coupons in the mail? What is this? 2003?

Ace: What does that look like to you?
Nancy: Blurry figure wearing a shirt - camouflage pattern.
George: Or a smudge.

Bess: So what's the plan?
Nancy: We get Ryan to the Claw and figure out exactly how he had Tiffany poisoned.
George: And how exactly do we get Ryan to the Claw?
Nick: Yeah, he's not just going to stroll in so we can accuse him of murder - again.

Ryan: What?
Ace: Nothing. You seem super innocent.

Karen: He admitted to poisoning Tiffany. Did he say anything else?
Nancy: No, he was too busy trying to bash my head in with a pipe wrench.

Edited February 27, 2020 by ElectricBoogaloo

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Carson: Nancy, you almost died last night.
Nancy: Almost dying is my new normal.

Nick: How did Josh even get his hands on some rare poison?
George: Well, serial killer Claire was our only local baneberry poisoner, right? Maybe they were in, like, a book club together or something.

Bess: Happy Harbor Day, my fellow Horseshoe Bay-ans. Horseshoe Bayites? Bayfolk?
Ace: Trying to get traction on Baygles. Horseshoe Baygles.

George: Girl, what is on your head?
Bess: This belonged to my great-great-great lots of great grandfather, Douglas Marvin. I borrowed it from Aunt Diana.
George: If they don't know you're borrowing, it's called stealing, Bess.

Ace: Urban legend says that one day a year on Harbor Day, you can look into the mirror, and you can ask the Aglaeca for something. One time I asked him for a PS3. I didn't get the PS3. But I asked for it. 
George: Yeah, same. I asked for tons of stuff in high school and I got none of them. Silver lining: my eyes didn't bleed which supposedly happens when you get your wish. 
Nancy: Are we talking about the Aglaeca? Yeah, that's a load of crap. I'm still waiting for my hoverboard scooter and my first edition copy of All The President's Men.

George: I'm just going to chill here with Bess and her ridiculous stolen hat.

Owen: Is [Nancy] okay? Who let her go confront a murderer by herself?
Bess: Who let her? Owen, have you met Nancy? And, you know, technically, she didn't know he was a murderer at the time.

Owen: I can rely on you to be discreet?
Chad: Bro. Totally.

Nancy: I've been having visions, and I think Lucy wants me to find her bones.
George: I'm sorry, what, now?
Nancy: Yeah, and that's not all. In the last vision, her eyes were bleeding.
Bess: Wait, like when you call to the Aglaeca?
Nancy: I think so.
George: Okay, so now you believe in all this crap?
Nancy: Out of pure necessity alone.

Bess: Okay, so we call to the Aglaeca.
Owen: Is this, like, a normal thing for you guys?
Bess: But today is the only day we can do it, right, George?
George: Yeah, but it never works. Need I remind you guys, I got a D in French? My call was not answered.
Bess: Yeah, but maybe you didn't know how to do it? Okay, we need a primary source.
George: What, is there a section in the local library with firsthand accounts of evil spirits that haunt the ocean, Bess?

Bess: It's not like we have any customers today. You know, with a murderer on the loose and all.
George: Surprise - fugitives and manhunts are kind of bad for business.

Nancy: You don't have to take AP Chem to know that in a glass container, the meniscus of a liquid containing poison like baneberry curves downward, but this meniscus curves upward because it's just water, right?

Karen: Ryan is untouchable. He's had people cleaning up his messes his entire life. And I know the system favors the privileged but the Hudson family are on a whole other level.
Nancy: So you thought that Ryan deserved to die because you were tired of how the world works?

Ace's dad: I can't tell if drinking fake poison was brave or incredibly stupid.

George: Typical. 300 pages about men and women get 2 pages in the back.

George: Are you guys sure that you want to do this? We've reached out to spirits in the past and the results have always been very mixed.
Bess: I promise to not let you get possessed again.
George: I feel so relieved.

George: Hey, who wants to hear a creepy nursery rhyme?

George: Prick your finger and let your blood drop into the ocean.
Bess: Ugh, this is so unsanitary.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Nick: Thanks for coming all this way.
John: Well, it beats sneaking illegal human bones into my lab.

John: What makes you think the remains of a girl who died twenty years ago suddenly just appeared?
Bess: We performed a mystical ritual asking an evil spirit for them.
John: Got it. You don't want to tell me. I probably don't want to know. I assum you kept these bones in a sanitary sterile environment as per basic scientific guidelines.
[Ace opens a Hanukkah box]

Abe: Detective Abe Tamura. This is the part where you invite me in.
George: Is he a vampire?

Nick: So many health code violations.

McGinnis: Try not to break any more federal laws.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Victoria: If you stay here one more night, I'm charging you rent. This ain't an airbnb.

Bess: Let me guess - you had a bizarre vision that turned into sand.
George: Tidal crab in my cornflakes.
Ace: Crusty nautical rope in the sink, severed finger.
Bess: Maggots in the tomatoes.
George: Nick found seawater in his shoe this morning and it wasn't a prank from my sisters.

Nancy: I need your help.
Ryan: Sorry, I can't today. I gotta get over to the free clinic in Trenton.
Nancy: Don't you have rich people health insurance?

Ryan: We're taking my car because yours is like a moped with a roof.

George: Do you mind? We were...
Bess: Looking for portents?
Nick: Yeah, exactly.
Bess: In each other's mouths? Carry on.

Bess: Oh, no. Yo-Yo Ma can't make it!

Ryan: Just out of curiosity, if I don't go and help does the sea demon come after Owen Marvin? Cause there are some pros and cons to him being dead.

Nancy: What is wrong with you? Why are you like this?
Ryan: Why am I like what? Nancy, what am I supposed to be like? You've met my dad.
Nancy: No, don't blame genetics because people make choices. You chose to hide your relationship with Lucy. You chose your corrupt parents' money over anything else in your life. You chose to step out on Tiffany. You are an entitled morally bankrupt legacy criminal with no spine and a thing for teenage girls.

George: My mom said escalation could mean we're marked for death so no pressure.

Ryan: You're smarter than that. That sounds like something I'd say.

George: Ryan is Nancy's dad.
Ace: Dead Lucy is her mom.
Bess: Wait, George slept with Nancy's dad.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Bess: We could talk to Owen.
Nancy: If he could tell us how the Aglaeca got to him, then maybe we could figure out how to stop her from getting to us.
Ace: So you guys want to do another seance?
Bess: We have got pretty good at this ghost thing.
Nick: Have we?

Ace: How do you know when these ghost traps are working? Do they light up or fly?
Nancy: It's supposed to make a little jingling sound.
Ace: Like Tinkerbell?

George: I can't tell you what Nancy doesn't need right now but, Ryan, this is definitely close.

Ace: I hope this wasn't a family heirloom.
Nick: I can fix it.
Nancy: The legs are shattered.
Nick: I can fix some of it.

Isaac: Are either of you artists by any chance? Whit has tasked me with finding a painter. Owen will need a portrait for the hall of tragedies.
Nick: There's a whole hall?

Nancy: How crazy have things gotten that we never even considered that the murderer could be an actual human?

Isaac: The cops are back? Please. There hasn't been a Marvin in bracelets since the feud with Harry Winston.

Cassidy: Isaac catfished his caddy. Took his identity, ruined his credit, bought a Hovercraft - all because of a bad read on the eighteenth green. But he loved Owen and he's too cheap to hire a hitman.

Ace: If you ever want to talk about anything, I'm here.
Nancy: I really appreciate that. If I find the words, I will share them with you. But until then, how great is it that I can avoid talking about my two dads by avoiding talking about my dead boyfriend?

Lisbeth: I respect that you are dealing with a huge loss but inserting yourself into a murder investigation isn't the way to do it.
Nancy: Agree to disagree.

Ryan: You always said you wanted to be with me.
George: Because I was 17! I was 17 and I had a crush on you and I thought it was something more because I didn't know any better. You did.
Ryan: You're right. I was being stupid and a liar and I made you think that I was going to leave Tiffany. My life was a mess.
George: Your life? Ryan, you are not the victim here.

Ace: Ooh, green jello. That's the good stuff.

Bess: There's no I in Aglaeca.

Bess: You're saying it like my family are a bunch of criminals.
Lisbeth: Uh, Bess, they have a hall of tragedies.

Edited April 16, 2020 by ElectricBoogaloo

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Ace: I'll try to render Bess non-flammable.

George: I just thought I had appendicitis but it turns out it was just bad fried clams from the Claw.
Carson: I've had that exact same experience a couple of times. You might want to look into changing vendors.

Bess: Okay, can I just be straight up? Is this your killing room?
Hudson: Who do you think I am?
Ace: Someone who kills people - 12 innocent men on a ship. Also you put a hit out on Carson Drew when he was in prison.

Hudson: When you say it out loud, it sounds down right criminal.
Ace: Says the man who put us in a room full of knives and a drain in the floor.

Nick: You know [Nancy]'s going to figure out we're together, right?
George: Maybe we tell her. Or maybe we let ourselves drown horrifically in your truck and get out of a really awkward conversation.

Ace: You want me to tell you you're nothing like your grandfather? That you don't drag your friends into bad situations?
Nancy: Yeah, kind of.
Ace: While you walk us into a haunted forest to look for a solution to a fatal curse that only got triggered because we helped you.

Tamura: What's that old saying? Where there's smoke, there's a miscreant teen sleuth who's about to be arrested.

Ryan: You can't steal a family heirloom when it belongs to your actual family.

Ryan: You are rebuilding your practice from the ground up because I fired you.
Carson: Because I was wrongfully accused of murder. It's not great for business.

Fred: "Please crush this in your truck crusher. TYSSM." First off, we don't operate on a note system.

Nick: If I were to roll this truck off a cliff, what do you want to bet-
George: It would land on a flock of seagulls that would fly its ass right back up here.

Edited January 23, 2021 by ElectricBoogaloo

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Nick: Here's the crazy thing.
Bess: You mean you've narrowed it down to one thing?

Ace: Hey, do you need a hand?
Carson: No, I'm good. The guy at the store said it was a one man job.
Ace: Mr. D, I think the guy at the store lied to you.

George: [Nick's mom] thinks I'm a raging lunatic.
Bess: No, she doesn't. It's just because she's only seen that side to you. Which doesn't exist.

Tamura: I'm unaccustomed to getting evidence briefings from seafood waitstaff.

Nancy: Call it a hunch.
Tamura: Motto of the armchair detective. I prefer facts.

Tamura: Are you this argumentative with everyone who tries to help you?
George: Can I answer that?

Mrs. Nickerson: Stephen King is right. Maine is filled with terrifying ghosts.
Ace: Ma'am, we also have lobsters. We have blueberries.
Bess: They're both delicious. But not together.

George: I am generally foul-mouthed, prickly, and distrustful.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Text:
Ace: Not coming in to work today. For obvious reasons.
Nancy: Avoiding death by meat hook? Best get out of gym note ever.

Ace: I'm getting married this afternoon with 150 guests. My florist was just extradited. Can you help me?
Lily: I would suggest zinnias, dahlias, and English daisies.

Carson: AJ was a total recluse, even back then. He bought an old hunting cabin up in the woods, almost never left it, refused to deal with the outside world.
Nancy: Like Salinger?
Carson: Or Kaczynski.

George: Do you have a nice jacket? Landlords like to rent to tenants who wear nice jackets.
Nick: Yeah, it's just under my top hat.

Nancy: Ryan Hudson getting his own groceries? What is it? A full moon or something?
Ryan: They're for Patrice Dodd.
Nancy: That's unexpected. You're getting groceries for Lucy's mom now?
Ryan: Yeah, well, she's all alone so I started visiting her.
Nancy: I need a favor.
Ryan: That's the opposite of unexpected.
Nancy: I know, but think about all the times I didn't ask you for money or braces or dance lessons or the keys to the Porsche.

Tamura: You look surprised.
Ace: No, this is my Shabbat face.

Tamura: Where's AJ Crane? Thirty minutes after you left, he escaped. You're going to tell me you don't know how that happened?
Nancy: I don't know how that happened.

 

 

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Nick: As far as mystic trapping devices go, this thing's junk. In order for a real Dybbuk box to work, it needs to be made from a certain kind of mahogany wood that's blessed by this rabbi who died in 1761. According to AJ's notes, he figured that out halfway through building. Hence - junk.

Ace: I already wrote my obituary. "Loving son, Scout, vintage automobile enthusiast."
Bess: "Beloved member of the Marvin family. Known for her quick wit and sublime sense of style."

Ace: Actually, I need your help. There's an 18th century dybbuk box in a private collection at a museum outside of Boston and I want to borrow it.
Carson: Well, I'm not really sure how I can help with that.
Ace: Uh, well, you could help, uh, by posing as the Hudsons' lawyer and requesting a loan of the piece on behalf of the family.

Ryan: "Ryan, would you like a coffee?" "Yeah, sure, that sounds good."
Ace: I said sorry. I didn't know about your lactose intolerance.

Ace: Hey, you know what? Let's play a game. I'll start. It's called "What If." What if you were a farmer and your favorite chicken gets sick? 
Carson: Are you the chicken? 
Ace: No. It's not about me. This is a hypothetical game. Now there's a chance that the chicken could get better all on its own and there might not be any need for you, the farmer, to worry. So, tell me, would you want to know?
Ryan: Well, it's kind of hard for me to have an opinion about being responsible for a chicken because I never got the opportunity to raise one.
Ace: No, no. It's not about you you, it's hypothetical.
Carson: Shouldn't the farmer do whatever's best for the chicken?
Ryan: You would say that, wouldn't you? Okay. Who won?
Ace: No one.
Ryan: And I don't get a coffee. This is awesome.

Bess Turani Marvin obituary:
A true rags to riches story. Bess Turani Marvin was born on a rainy night in Tower Hamlets, London. Her humble story began as a loving daughter to a single-mother. Bess spent her early years struggling to help keep a leaky roof over their heads and tea and Marm in the cupboard. Bess almost accepted that this would be her life, even though she always believed she was meant for something more. Through a twist of fate, she discovered she had long, lost dear relatives in the States. The magnanimous Marvins. Bess heart urged her to reconnect with this side of her family to get to know them and to discover who she truly was and who she was truly meant to be. With her indomitable, fearless spirit, Bess took action and began to manifest her new future.

Nancy: Hey, what's up with you? Rich people tchotchkes are usually your catnip.

Nancy: What is this?
Nick: In layman's terms, ghost-vision goggles.

Carson: If you think that buying your way into [Nancy's] life is the way to forge a relationship, you're wrong.
Ryan: And if you had all the answers, you'd still be living in your house.

Nancy: Do you read music?
Ryan: Uh, yeah, my mother forced me to take piano lessons on that grand in our living room, so I learned "The Song That Doesn't End" and I played it for six hours straight one day. Showed her.
Nancy: That's why Agnes dog-eared this hymn.
Ryan: That's what... what?
Nancy: That's it. 
Ryan: I'm right?
Nancy: Yeah.
Ryan: I just solved something before Nancy Drew?

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Nancy: I put the seaweed wreath in here. There should be sand in here.
Bess: I feng shui-ed the space.
Nancy: You what?
Bess: I threw it out. Nancy, wait, hold on. How was I supposed to know we were going to need it?
Nancy: No, it's fine.
Bess: Listen, my qi felt so balanced afterward.

Ace: Looks like the Aglaeca comes to personally claim her victims. Think she can be in four places at once?
Nick: Not likely.
Ace: So then she comes for you one by one? I'd been picturing, like, a totally simultaneous Godfather-style group event.

Ryan: Man, we should've brought binoculars.
Carson: I know we're worried about Nancy, but binoculars would cross a line, obviously.
Ryan: Is that obvious? I wouldn't know. My dad used to pay PIs to tail me.
Carson: Are you serious?
Ryan: Yeah. He wanted to know how many secrets I had.
Carson: How do you even know that? Ryan: Cause one of his PIs reached out to me personally. So we came up with a number that felt right, and I started paying him to give Everett misinformation. I think Dad caught on pretty quick, but I think he respected my initiative. It was kind of like our father-son bonding activity, you know?
Carson: I have some parenting books I can recommend to you.

Carson: You're not going to stand up to your father?
Ryan: I've thought about it. Even if I had a bulletproof way to take down Everett, then what? Ruin our family's fortune? Then what do I do? Work at a coffee shop?

Ryan: I know what this looks like, but we are not stalking you. Respectfully following, maybe.

Nancy: Ryan, why is your car so clean?
Ryan: Because I vacuum it every day.
Nancy: Okay, where's your vacuum?
Ryan: In the trunk. What is going on?
Nancy: You keep a vacuum in your trunk? That's not weird. That's not weird, right?
Carson: I keep a DustBuster in my car just in case.

Bess: Does anyone besides Nancy have any loose ends they want to tie up?
George: What kind of loose ends?
Bess: I don't know. Regrets, ruminations, deathbed confessions.
Ace: I confess that I hacked into a federal database to get the phone number of somebody in witness protection.
Bess: You did? Who?
George: Bess, it's called witness protection.

Bess: I borrowed your pocketknife without asking.
Ace: You took Madeline?
Bess: And I took George's skull bracelet.
George: Yeah, I knew that.
Bess: And your key fob, Nick. I didn't take any of the keys. It was just the shiny bit. I have a problem. I steal things when I feel bad. And if we do live, I am going to try and stop doing that.
Ace: Stop feeling bad or stealing?
Bess: Both.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Ace: How's the yacht life?
Bess: Oh, wonderful. My chakras are aligning by the minute.
Ace: I've been thinking about getting that done.

Connor: You should make different life choices.

Connor: This isn't New York.
Tamura: I know. I've tried your bagels.

Nancy: I think that this body wants me to solve its murder.
George: Are you sure this isn't you just feeling aimless and grasping for a sense of identity during your gap year?

Nancy: I found this in his mouth at the morgue.
George: Yeah, that's probably why he followed you home. My mom says never steal from the dead.
Nancy: I think it's from a ritualistic practice or a calling card from a serial killer.

Nick: No, we are not performing an autopsy in your kitchen.
Bess: You're absolutely right, Nick. We should do it in the living room. There's more space.

Nancy: I'm not proposing anything formal. I just think it's an opportunity for observation and conjecture.
Ace: I concur. It's not every day that we get the opportunity to look at a haunted corpse.
Nancy: Precisely. Take your opportunities when they come.

Bess: Okay, we've got a pizza cutter, a paring knife, and some scissors [for the autopsy]. I'm thinking we use the pizza cutter for the outside layers and then the paring knife once we're inside.

Ace: You might not want to look at this. But also you should come look at this.

Ace: How's George? Is she all right with everything?
Nick: What? Like that time she literally died?

Connor: I'm calling the police.
Nancy: To tell them what? That you left a proven burglar alone during her community service in the morgue against protocol, giving her clearly plenty of time to take a murder victim home?

Connor: It is not my job to provide half baked community service for teenage felons.

Charlie: That doesn't even look like a cat.
Ted: That's because she's in her astronaut suit!

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Carson: Why are you making that face?
Nancy: I just thought being your investigator would be more...
Carson: Exciting? I get it. But I haven't even told you the best part, which is that you get to two hole punch any documents that we should admit into [evidence].

Nancy: What college is going to want to take me right now? I tanked my senior year grades, I got arrested breaking into the morgue, and I didn't sign up to retake my SATs because I was too busy summoning bones from an evil sea spirit that tried to kill me, which is stupid anyway.
Carson: You - wait, what?

Ace: I just wanted to flag that you're yelling about towels in public right now. It's a little embarrassing - for you.

Ace: So what's the case?
Nancy: Alleged ghost abduction.
Ace: Ghost abduction. That would have been like my third guess.

Nancy: Everyone who stayed here [in this hotel room] in the winter complained that no matter how much they turned the heat up, it was always drafty.
Bess: Well, yeah, that makes sense then, doesn't it? Ghosts.
George: Although Maine, winter, old ass building - cold.
Nancy: And everyone who stayed in this room in the summer said how beautifully cool it was.
Bess: Yeah. Ghosts.
George: Also again - Maine, ocean, air conditioning. Ghosts cannot be your go-to for everything.
Nancy: Or a draft from a hidden door. Ace said that the hotel was originally built as a family home, and what do rich families have?
George: If you say ghosts one more time!

George: All that's missing are the pervy peepholes.

Ace: You don't cook pancakes in the oven! Who raised you?

Nancy: Ace finally uploaded the hotel security footage to our ftp.
Bess: You and Ace have a private server?

Nancy: You need to explain right now.
George: Okay, I was trying to find the right time to tell you guys but I didn't want to worry anyone and I thought that I could take care of it and then I did and it worked but then it didn't work.
Nancy: Slower with more specific words.
George: Odette Lamarr's ghost has been timesharing in my body.

George: I've tried a bunch of different exorcisms and nothing has worked.
Bess: Wait, wait, wait - you did an exorcism without me?

[ElectricBoogaloo]

George: Don't tell Nick. I haven't quite looped him in yet.
Nancy: About the murderous French ghost that's time sharing your body ever since we defeated the Aglaeca?
George: It hasn't come up in conversation.

Riley: Celia has corporate PR sending over some topics of things to stay away from.
Nick: Well, you just make sure you add the secret child you had with Lucy Sable to that list.

Nancy: Ryan, I see you. Stop being so weird!

Nancy: That cannot be a coincidence, George.
George: Couldn't it be, just this once?

George: I'm trying to rationalize and you're not letting me!

Nancy: Who knows what would happen if you ever got shrouded again? Which means we should definitely not flatline you and reshroud you as a way to hit the reset button.
George: Have you seriously been thinking about flatlining me?
Nancy: Not seriously.

Odette: Why is it that any time something vile happens, it always involves [Nancy]?

Odette: Oof, am I still here? What hilarity.

Valentina: You're pretty down to earth despite your family's wealth.
Ryan: Can I get you to print that? Because I feel like some people might disagree around here.

[Ace spills wine]
Diana: Yikes, I'm drenched. I thought you were a professional waiter.
Ace: I'm more on the dishwashing track. That's my background. That's my training.
Diana: It shows.

Bess: I'm so sorry for what I put you all through.
Nancy: It wasn't my first chloroforming.

Edited March 20, 2021 by ElectricBoogaloo

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Odette: I give you permission to au revoir!

George: Hey, Ace, was anything else taken [besides the shroud]?
Ace: They took a banana cream pie.

Nancy: Did you tell Amanda [about the shroud] or not?
Ace: It's hard to say. Something about her just opens me up. Like a flower. I'm in bloom.
George: Wow, Ace. I'm so happy for you. You've got a crush and now I'm going to die.

Nick: Okay, so the plan is you distract Gil trying to solve his mom's murder and then we toss his place and find the shroud?
Nancy: It's not there, Nick.
Nick: Then we dangle him from the roof until he tells us where it is.
Nancy: No, the plan is solve his mom's murder and get the shroud back.
Nick: What? By 6pm?

George: Exorcisms will not get rid of Odette. I told you. I've tried all of this on her. None of it works.
Nick: Maybe you missed something.
George: Maybe I missed something? Nick, please show me someone more motivated than me to find a solution to this.

Nick: George? What's going on? (
Odette: "What's going on?" You ask that of George constantly. Can thoughts in her head not remain in her head?

Odette: I am imprisoned in this tiny, oddly garmented body with my idiot cellmate who cannot tell granite from limestone.

George: What did I miss?
Nick: Odette called me an idiot.

Ace: Another suspect not of this earth. Cool.

Gallery owner: Restrooms are for clients only,
Ace: That's a shame because we'd heard great things about your restrooms.

Bess: This is really good,
Carson: I buttered both sides of the bread.

Bess: How can they sell you a piece of art without giving you the artist's name?
Ace: Well, technically, they sold it to Nick.
Nick: What?

Bess: Cheer up, boss. We won. George is safe. The shroud is locked away. All is well in the world.
Nick: I mean, there's still an old-timey French lady living in my girlfriend, but, you know.

Edited March 25, 2021 by ElectricBoogaloo

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Bess: So do you have the headline for the society profile yet? I was thinking "Ryan It on for Size."
Ace: "The Prodigal Hudson Returns."
Bess: Or "The Hudson Also Rises."
Nancy: I think that Ms. Samuels has got it covered.
Ace: Just Ryan to help.

Nancy: I taught myself how to read lips at the ice cream shop. "Pistachio with sprinkles" was a tough one.

Valentina: I like how clean your social media is. No bikini pics. Nothing overtly sexual. You come across as someone who's wholesome. You're the kind of girl people can take seriously.
Nancy: I have been known to wear a bikini sometimes. I don't think that that changes my accomplishments or my intelligence.

Nancy: Did you call the police?
Lily: Yeah. I got Detective Tamura. You know, the one with the bedside manner of a plumber.

Nancy: Apparently, in order to succeed in life, I need to don a nun's habit and stay chaste.
Bess: Well, that's good, right? Cause someone's always chasing you.

George: Odette better leave this body as she found it.
Nick: Are you taking pictures of yourself like a rental car?
George: Yes.
Nick: Hey, I guarantee you return with the same number of tattoos and piercings.

Tamura: Nancy Drew. To what do I owe the nuisance? 
Nancy: Detective Tamura. I hear you're making some new friends. Lily the florist came to see me.
Tamura: Ah, the great bouquet heist. Crime of the century.

Tamura: Who's that?
Nancy: I think if you're going to work this beat, you might want to learn to ask "What is that?" instead of "who?"

Gil: Looks like we got a new ghost in town. You know, normal burglars don't go walking around in vintage brocaded wedding gowns, detective.
Nancy: A wedding gown? How do you know what brocade is? 
Gil: I have an eye.

Nancy: There was one account in particular that stood out to me under "bride, comma, ghost." There you go.
Tamura: Brocade bodice.
Nancy: How does every man suddenly know what that is?
Tamura: So what's your theory? This bride is back from the dead and window shopping?

Nancy: According to the old keepers' research, the dress itself has supernatural abilities. The Bridal Gown of Boothbay tames the wildest of women by suppressing their carnal desires.
Ace: Who would want that?
Tamura: It was all the rage back in the day. It's why they invented graham crackers. Graham was a preacher who believed that unbleached flour kept you from... touching.
Nancy: Guess that being bound in whalebone corsets just wasn't enough. Well, supposedly the dress converted women into chaste, submissive brides just in time for them to make it to the altar.

Bess: Ooh, who's getting married?
Ace: Nobody. The supernatural detective and the basic one stumbled on a case that may call for Bess Marvin, fashion police.

[after seeing Bess and George leave on a not-date and hearing that Nick was at the historical society and that Ace was leaving the restaurant]
Tamura: Do any of you actually work here?

Tamura: Would your ghost leave hairs at the scene?
Nancy: Sorry, what? Do you have a hair sample? And you didn't tell me that? Why?
Tamura: Mmm, because you're not an actual cop.

Nancy: Can I make an observation?
Tamura: I haven't been able to stop you yet.

Nancy: Looks like she was the kind of girl that got around so they forced her to get married, made her put on the dress. It took away her desire, and next thing you know, she went nuts and killed her husband. What if it's not a ghost? What if it's a living person under the influence of a haunted dress which carries the ghostly imprint of the murder perpetrated by the last bride who wore it? 
Tamura: Oh, yeah. That's much easier to accept. Now, purely hypothetically, where would one get a haunted dress? Is that at a werewolf seamstress?

Hannah: I didn't mean to take the gown. It just kept calling to me, you know? From the boxes. Like Jumanji.

Nancy: I know you might need a minute to process what just happened.
Tamura: No, I've seen people do strange things when they're high. I once saw a man eat his own bicycle.

George: Why are we handcuffed to a bench?

[Nancy's phone rings with Detective Tamura's name on the caller ID]
Nancy: Did you already forget how to do your job without me?

Nancy: Were you just walking in slow motion?
Tamura: Excuse me?
Nancy: God, sorry. Whew! Are you always this hot in here?

Tamura: Your friends are freshening up. I just gave them toothbrushes.
Nancy: Yes. A clean mouth is so sanitary. I am, I'm just, I'm a huge fan of hygiene, personally.

Gil: So you guys are still together.
Nancy: What? Oh, no, we're not together. That would be inappropriate. Wouldn't it?

Nick: Hey, where have you been? I've been calling you.
Bess: Yeah. Uh, the police took our phones.
Nick: What? 
George: We'll circle back on that later.
Nick: Are you all right?
George: Yes, I am okay, but somebody dosed jelly legs over here.
Nancy: Ooh. How much have you been working out?

George: I wasn't even in this reality, and somehow my chaperone's chaperone needed a chaperone.

Nancy: Can I touch [your hair]? Oh. It's so much softer than I even imagined.
Ace: Nancy, it's a net.
Nancy: Who's Annette? I'll kill her.
Ace: No, the gown. The gown is a net. You ripped a hole in it.
Nancy: Yes, yes! And all the lust butterflies went in my face.
George: CliffsNotes version, please?
Nancy: The dress contained the stolen lust of a century's worth of women and when I destroyed the gown, I released all that lust and it got stuck inside me. Gawd, you are so smart, Ace. I don't care what anybody says.

Bess: There's a notation in here that says the dress was locked in the Historical Society by the Women in White.
George: Oh, you mean the witchy badasses who first called to the Aglaeca?
Ace: This says they sewed the dress themselves on commission from a wealthy family.
George: Oh, so, the badass witchy types also dabbled in female repression. Not exactly the epitome of allyship. 
Nick: Hey, Thomas Jefferson never freed his slaves. Margaret Sanger started Planned Parenthood to support eugenics.
George: And rich people needed their sexually liberated daughters to quiet down and get married.

Ace: I found my brother.
Bess: You have a brother? Wait, hold on. You lost your brother?
Ace: No, I've never met him. He's lived his entire life in witness protection since before I was even born.
Bess: What did he witness?
Ace: He didn't witness anything. His mom did.
Bess: Right. And his mum is not your mum? 
Ace: No. And I don't think my mom knows either. The U.S. Marshal who ran his mom's security detail was my dad. 
Bess: Oh.
Ace: Again, it all happened before I was even born. A year ago, I was digging around for details of my dad's early career and fell down this rabbit hole that led to-
Bess: Evidence of a secret affair with this other woman? Right, okay. So then you hacked into a federal database and found out that you had a brother. Wow. You really are an onion, aren't you?

Ace: I shouldn't have let Odette get you blackout drunk.
Bess: Okay, I mean, I wasn't. I mean, I drank. I drank real good. But it was with intent. It seemed like the best way to evade from the feelings that I was having.
Ace: The feelings that made you want to make out with a ghost trapped in your friend's body?

Odette: And what are you so upset about?
George: Well, for one, I've inherited a hangover that I didn't even earn.

Bess: The instructions for this dress read more like a recipe. It's like inlaid mother of pearl sewn throughout the fabric.
Ace: It could be the secret ingredient that contains the lust. 
Ryan: What are you guys talking about?

George: So you're going to cure her with pearl cream?
Bess: You ever seen a horny oyster?

Nancy: I'm going to be sick. 
George: Ace, get her a bucket now.
Bess: Anything bucket-like will do.

Nick: Is she okay?
George: Still Handsy Drew, but we gave her the antidote.
Bess: I mean, come on. It might take a minute to kick in.
Ace: We probably didn't poison her.

Tamura: I feel awkward saying this, but, um, I liked working on the case together.
Nancy: Our brains are so compatible, right?
Tamura: I thought you hated me. 
Nancy: I don't think we should let the fact that we hate each other get in the way of doing what we really want.
Tamura: I wasn't suggesting that we do anything.

Nancy: I'm kind of disappointed in my ancestor, Temperance Hudson. Then again, I'm kind of disappointed in women nowadays in general.
Bess: Val Samuels really got in your head, huh?
Nancy: I don't know. She thought she was complimenting me by being reserved online. I guess I just don't really understand why somebody should be complimented for buttoning up their sexuality in the first place.
George: Okay, you really want to solve thousands of years of self-inflicted, self-sabotaging woman-on-woman repression tonight? Probably not.
Bess: Perhaps we should end the night by saying, Nancy, you are a brilliant detective, chaste or unchaste.

Nancy: After I stopped fighting against the spell and analyzing it, it felt so liberating to just feel desire.
George: Yeah, well, you are big on the thinking.

Ace: My brother's in town. He sent me a pin. He wants me to meet him at the cannery.
Bess: Right, you want me to come with you and then ditch you when you really need me.
Ace: Still juicing that lemon? 
Bess: That was the last squeeze.

Edited April 1, 2021 by ElectricBoogaloo

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Nick: I'm from Florida? Then why am I here in Maine?
Nancy: It wasn't really a choice. You got yourself into a little bit of trouble when you were 16.
George: You came for your friend Tiffany.
Bess: Yeah, who actually gave you several millions of dollars so congratulations, you're a millionaire!

Nick: So I'm a lying millionaire who couch hops and has no home.

Ryan: As soon as her ladies who yacht luncheon docks, Celia has her weekly summit meeting with Everett.
Nancy: Can we dial down the dramatics a little bit? People find out they're grandparents every day. Not you. I'm not.

Ryan: You wouldn't be the first wayward family member that [Everett] ran off of a ski slope.

Bess: Nothing changes if nothing changes.

Nick: I'm a murder suspect?

George: Did I mention you were a mechanic before you bought a restaurant?

Mark: I trolled Aristotle so I wouldn't kill him. The guy was the worst roommate.
Ace: Even with all this awesome Viking-centric decor?

George: Did you put her memory in the same bottle with Nick's? Is Nick going to come back part Celia?

Ace: This is a terrible podcast.

Ace: I guess we inhaled.

Nick: Nick Nickerson. Good at building stuff. Suspect in a murder investigation but don't worry - you are innocent.
George: Want to trade? I have a dead French lady inside me. My name's George and I am your girlfriend.
Nick and George: Heeeeeey.

Ace: I'm Ace. I'm not sure if that's a first name or a last name.
Bess: Okay, I'm Bess Marvin. I'm a social media savant, a former klepto, and into girls.

Nancy on video: If you're watching this, attempt 5, watergunning the entity with holy water, did not work.

Nancy on video: If you're watching this, attempt 7, slingshoting steak knives at the entity did not work.

List of attempts:
1. knives
2. rat poison
3. battery acid
4. anti-freeze
5. holy water guns
6. molotov cocktails + acetone = fire!
7. throwing knives
8. bleach
9. dry ice
10. hot fryer grease dump
11. catapult box of ground spices
12. banishment spell
13. peace offerings and say a prayer of positivity and thanks
14. Ace as bait - trip wire
15. electrical - steel plate?
16. mirrors

Bess: For attempt number 17, we'll shoot acid filled balloons using a tennis ball machine.

Odette: Your memories are not worth dying for.
Nancy: No, our memories are what make us who we are and that is worth fighting for.

Edited April 8, 2021 by ElectricBoogaloo

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Grant: My plan was to get a job at the restaurant, make sure you weren't a psycho, then become great friends.

Grant: Aside from DNA, we don't have much in common.
Ace: That can't be true. Come on, litmus test. Aerosmith or AC/DC? One, two, three.
Grant: Aerosmith.
Ace: AC/DC.

Grant: [Daniel] said [my mom] stole something very valuable from the company they used to work for right before she entered WITSEC. And now he wants it. Back then, she said she'd buried it underground somewhere in her hometown in a place called Red Gate. I've looked everywhere, and I can't find the hiding spot. Daniel will be here in 24 hours, which is why I decided to confide in you.
Ace: Because you heard that I've been called the hero of Horseshoe Bay?
Grant: Because I knew you could talk Nancy Drew into helping me.
Ace: That was my second guess.

Nancy: [Red Gate] was a farm. It shut down after I uncovered this nature cult when I was in the tenth grade.

Nancy: Hey, so, in the stone age of the '90s, there was a local woman who went into witness protection after testifying against her employer. Does that ring any bells?

Jesse: Look, they're moving.
George: Good. We have to cook them alive or the taste is all wrong.
Jesse: That's something a barbarian says.

Grant: I believe we were looking for spelunking items.
Ace: Yeah, I think we're going to have to improvise. Spelunking Wiffle ball bat. Spelunker's lucky lifeguard whistle. And a couple pairs of-
Grant: Tunnel cleats?

George: I am so tired of losing the Chowder Bowl to those granola crunchers at The Beak.

Jean: You have a request. Manual labor comes at a price.

Ace: Star Wars or Star Trek?
Grant: In what possible scenario would you ever have to choose?

Nancy: What do you have in your backpack?
Ace: Four rock climbing cams, a baseball net, a whistle.
Grant: We can use this tire jack I brought to help secure the beams.

Jesse: A hundred little dead bodies bobbing in a cream-based funeral.
George: Okay, you are so not in charge of writing our menu description.

Jesse: After you fall asleep after a long day, Odette comes out.
George: What? You've met Odette?
Jesse: Yeah. She helps me with my French homework. Ted really likes her, too. They've been using Ted's telescope to track some comet flyby that's happening next week.
George: What about Charlie? Has she met her, too?
Jesse: Yeah, a bunch of times, but Charlie thinks you're just messing with us and actually being fun.

George: What the hell is this?
Bess: What is that? Oh, you got a letter? Who sends letters anymore, am I right?
George: Gee. I don't know. Who dots their I's with hearts and signs "Kisses, Bess"? You're writing love letters to a ghost?

Ace: I promise our next bro-hang will be less dangerous. We can do a deep dive into why Back in Black is the best album ever made.

Grant: Star Trek. Better science.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Nancy: My dad has a client, a captain who crashed his ship and is getting sued for lost merch. 500 gallons of pickles lost at sea.
Gil: A tragedy for the ages.
Nancy: The captain claims that he crashed because he was blinded by a light on Moonstone Island. I kind of want to check it out.
Gil: You know, the waters around Moonstone Island are dangerous. Ships have been crashing there for years.
Nancy: Yeah, sounds fun.

Ace: [My dad] would rather bury his feelings than talk about them.
Amanda: My kind of guy.

Amanda: Before you go, do you think you could take a passport photo of me?
Ace: Now?
Amanda: Yeah. I mean, my hair looks amazing and I will never be able to recreate this on my own.

Gil: Hey, we should get going. We have a date on Moonstone Island.
Ace: You have a date on an uninhabitable island?

George: Hey, what happened to your essay on The Great Gatsby for Mrs. Upton?
Jesse: I didn't finish it.
George: No, I got that from her email. Why didn't you finish it?
Jesse: Poor time management?

Odette: You are a business owner. You cannot be clothed in children's outerwear.

Nancy: Carson's client said he saw a beacon coming from the lighthouse but according to the Coast Guard, the lighthouse has been inoperable for 50 years.
Amanda: Confirmed. It is a pile of rubble.

Amanda: I'm getting my passport and hiking Camino de Santiago.
Gil: Backpacking through Europe - so basic. You know, I expected more from Amanda's first big girl adventure.
Ace: Why are you such a dick?
Gil: Amanda and I have our own code.
Ace: Codependency is not a code.

Odette: No one would embrace in such a familiar manner. They could contract typhoid.

Edited April 30, 2021 by ElectricBoogaloo

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Nick: Ryan and I have been trying to set a meeting for my youth center and I figured I'd get the Hudson Outreach Fund involved.
Nancy: And out of the blue, you got a phone call saying it was set for tonight?
Ryan: An email, yeah.
Nancy: So everybody here was just invited mysteriously.
Tamura: There are no mysteries here tonight, just jail.

Ace as Aunt Mei: Xiao Lan, who told you to wear your hair like this? Don't you know it makes your face look too round?

Tamura: I'm starting to understand why I hate small towns.

George: Okay, Aunt Mei, why are you communicating through Ace?
Ace as Aunt Mei: Because I wanted to know what it's like to be a tall white man so when you called on me, I thought, here's my chance.

Ace as Aunt Mei: What do you want with Mary Clarke?
George: I have a very pushy ghost trapped inside my body named Odette Lamar, and I agreed to help her find Mary.
Ace as Aunt Mei: See, Xiao Lan? This is what happens when you don't go to college.

George: I have my own path.
Ace as Aunt Mei: It's not a path if it doesn't go anywhere. That's a hole in the ground.

George: [Your reading glasses] were in lost and found.
Ace as Aunt Mei: What else did you find? Your ambition? A husband? A future?
George: I walked right into that one.

Nancy: What's that right there? On her back fender. Nick's a car guy.
Tamura: I get it. I'm just an actual detective.

Bess: So why does [Aunt Mei] call you Xiao Lan? Is that your Chinese name?
George: No. It's her weird nickname for me. It means "little lazy." Anytime I did something slowly or wrong, she thought that would motivate me.
Bess: That's not a very motivational name.

Carson: Nancy's being held hostage at the police station, and we have to save her without tipping anyone off. Can you help? That sounded like a question, but it was really a statement.

George: I was actually thinking we could use the rubber floor mats in the car to insulate us from the electric charge.
Carson: That's a great idea. And if these don't work, maybe we can scale the side of the building, hope to find a trapdoor on the roof. Look at us. Who needs Ace?

Bess: So Nancy's fake birthday, that is just arbitrary, right? Why did you pick November 19th?
Carson: It's the anniversary of the Gettysburg Address. Kate had a mild obsession with Abraham Lincoln, so we named Nancy after Lincoln's mother.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Nick: What happened?
George: Oh, I accidentally summoned a kitchen demon into Bess's cheek.

Tom: Bruh, how did they talk you into all of this?
Nick: Uh, after I came to this town-
Tom: You met some white people? Got into their nonsense? Tiger Woods Syndrome. We understand.

Barclay: This is much less vomit than when we were in Ibiza.

Ace: It's not a supernatural issue after all. That's different.
Tom: Are you all broomstick people?

Ace: I'm going to skip the part where I pretend that I wasn't eavesdropping.

Tom: Back to the meteorite men, huh?
Nancy: Okay, they used the money that they made touring the meteorite to buy up some real estate. Then they sold the real estate, made some more money, and a couple years later, they formed a fraternal organization, called themselves the Icarans.
Tom: Ooh, yes. Straight men love an excuse to put on a dress, don't they?

Tom: Those were, those were-
Nancy: Ghosts.
Tom: No, no, no. Ghosts aren't real, okay? There has to be an explanation. Hallucinatory mold?
Nancy: Ghosts.
Tom: Uh, local teens pranking us?
Nancy: Tom, ghosts. The ghosts of the dead Icarans.
Tom: Whatever was in there exerted kinetic energy. I can apply physics to energy.
Nancy: You cannot science your way through ghosts. That's not how this works.

Tom: Nancy, I appreciate you but I went to MIT and you went to a thrift store to buy that hat.

Val: Does your family normally throw parties every time one of you gets off on murder charges when weird stuff is happening all over town?

Nancy: Your mother invited me to Everett's party. When she said black tie optional, was that a trick?

Nancy: Is that Val Samuels? What is she doing here?
Ryan: She's having lunch with me right now.
Nancy: Something's not right about that, Ryan. I think she's sniffing around for a reason.
Ryan: Yeah, or she just enjoys my company. Look, we've been keeping in touch since she wrote the article about me and I got to tell you, I'm actually-
Nancy: Are you talking to me about your love life right now?
Ryan: Yeah, I guess I am. Is that weird?
Nancy: It wasn't until just now. Bye!

Tom: I was unfortunately prevented from getting the meteorite.
Nancy: Because of the ghosts. Come on. Say it.

Tom: Why are you wearing a prom dress?
Nancy: Oh, I might have to go to this thing this week.
Tom: An ugly dress party?
Nancy: No, it's for Everett Hudson. I owe his wife a favor.
Tom: What kind of favor?
Nancy: Just the kind that you would owe murderous, life-shattering billionaires.

Tom: So have you always been into magic or did you want to be Black Harry Potter?

Nancy: Val Samuels seems to be chasing Ryan. I think she's working against him, but I need proof. Ace, can you hack into Ryan's phone so I can figure out which hotel room she's staying in, steal her laptop?
Ace: Yeah.
Nancy: I wasn't going to ask you to steal.
Bess: No, you're not enabling my addiction. No, no, no, I only get, like, a buzz off shiny things, remember?

Nick: That's not a gas leak. That's people slaughtering each other.
Tom: Now I get the cover up. That's pretty bad PR for the patriarchy.

Nick: I don't like Lemon Demon.
George: "Cabinet Man" is our favorite song.
Nick: No, I googled "Cabinet Man" because I liked you. Also I've never seen Friends.
George: Wait, even after I binge-watched it?

Nick: There's this guy in the Claw, and he comes in every week. He loves to sing along with rap lyrics and he says the N word a lot.
George: So why don't you just tell him to stop?
Nick: Because then they just say, "Why do you get to say it, but I don't?" And then I have to argue with them about how that word is offensive, knowing full well that they are not gonna hear me. Explaining yourself all the time is just exhausting. It's easier just to keep quiet than to be the angry Black guy.

Nancy: How do we know they're working?
Tom: If the meteorite doesn't turn us into a bunch of murdering lunatics.

Tom: See? No phantoms. Thanks, science. You're welcome.

Nancy: I've seen that kind of smoke before. It was the Women in White.
Tom: Okay, I feel like we've maxed out on secret societies.
Nancy: This is more like a spooky sorority. That smoke is one of their trademarks, but it's not the only one. The Women in White have a thing for animal bones, herbs, dead insects.
Tom: You have a mobile witch library?

Nick: I can't promise my friends back in Miami Gardens won't say something reckless about me dating an Asian girl either.
George: Would they expect me to be harmless, submissive and well-behaved? Why do you think I'm so prickly sometimes? Cause the world expects me to be polite and super high-achieving and awesome at math.
Nick: That sounds frustrating.
George: Maybe not as frustrating as having white guys argue with you about why they can use racial slurs.
Nick: Tell you what. I'll watch Friends with you if you watch Coming to America with me. And next time that jackass comes in, I'll just tell him he can't do racist karaoke in our restaurant.

Tom: If you want to survive a bunch of life-shattering billionaires, you just have to tuck Nancy Drew under some armor. My armor is Balmain, fast cars, savage wit.
Nancy: So you're going to lend me your Ferrari?

Nancy: Oh, no. Bess went full Jack Nicholson.

Nancy: You're using a piece of wood as a fire hose.
Tom: You just started a fire with your blood.

Tom: Now I can build my dad a spaceship.

Tom: Now I just need to find a gorgeous man to kiss, put it on the internet, and there's no way my dad will pretend anymore. Hey, Nick, help your boy out. One pic, no tongue.
Nick: Never talk about my hairline again and I'm in.
Tom: Oh, brother, it's flawless like Lebron's.
Nick: Hey, is a photo okay with you?
George: There's an extra person living in my body. You're good.

Bess: I posted it on your live feed, Tom.
Ace: They're saying Nick's biceps look like thighceps.
Nick: Oh, that's very kind of you, internet.

Edited May 13, 2021 by ElectricBoogaloo

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Everett: I wouldn't expect my wife to keep track of time today. She gets this way when she's planning one of her parties. All obligations go out the window when table settings are on the line.

Val: There's no "do not disturb" on the door. Maybe it's time to make up [Howard's] room?
Amanda: That's it? You're just gonna ask for, like, a favor?
Ryan: I'm sorry. I thought that the bribe was implied. Umm, all I've got is big bills.
Amanda: That'll do.

Ryan: It looks like Howard killed himself.
Val: Yeah, "looks like."

Bess: While I have you, you're a slightly judgy outside observer, right?

George: Bess, what is the problem? Just be yourself.
Bess: A former con artist who likes to dabble in the supernatural looking to rebound from a crush on a dead woman!

Ryan: Hey, Ace, so, I've got a guy over at the Seabury prison who confirmed that Howard was there yesterday visiting an inmate.
Ace: What does that mean, you got a guy?

Bertram: Who's this boy who is not your brother?
Amanda: Uh, this is Ace.
Ace: Good to meet you, sir.
Bertram: You, too. She never lets me meet her boyfriends. This must be important.
Amanda: Uh, dad, you had a visitor recently.
Bertram: Yeah. Also not your brother.

Amanda: What I know about my dad is he loves to collect keys.
Nick: And by that, you mean your father steals keys.
Amanda: He holds on to them. Just in case.
Ryan: Wait. I think this went to my high school Porsche.

Bess: I think Nancy just used me for information. Yeah. And I don't know how I feel about that.
George: And I'm not sure how I feel about Nancy skipping another shift again, but, hey, here we all are.

George: You're just using that as an excuse not to finish your dating profile.
Bess: No, I'm deleting that. No way. No, I'm gonna be a ghost-whispering spinster for the rest of my life, and no profile can change that.

Celia: You know, you tell someone that their work is substandard once, okay, maybe twice, and all of a sudden they act as if they're too good for your business.

Ryan: Wait. This is a greenhouse. We didn't have a greenhouse.
Val: Really?
Ryan: No.
Val: Must be a clue. What did you have that was green?
Ryan: Uh, tennis courts were green, uh, swimming pool topiaries. The old stable was green.
Nick: Greenhouse. What was overgrown?
Ryan: I mean, pretty much everything. Bobbsey was a lousy groundskeeper. Again, no offense.
Amanda: Okay, well, what did he work on that was especially half-assed?
Ryan: Well, the old stables. For sure. And the aviaries.
Val: Totally normal thing to have.

Nick: It's your family. You get to desecrate their graves.
Ryan: Okay. Let's start with the closest one.
Val: 22 archaeologists died opening Tutankhamun's tomb.
Nick: You believe in curses?
Ryan: Hey, can we not right now, please?

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Nancy: All I want to hear from you is how you killed Celia and why.
Everett: What?
Nancy: Was I not loud enough? You murdered her. Where's the weapon?

Everett: Gil Bobbsey. Stole a limo, helped out with a kidnapping. Perfect. If you wanted to join your father in prison, well, mission accomplished.

Bess: Oh, you're scrapbooking. Oh, this calms me down, too.
Carson: No, no, no. I wasn't scrapbooking and it's not calming me down.

George: Maybe you should leave town for a while.
Nick: Then who will watch you sleep?

George: I thought being landlord means you get to do whatever you want.

Nick: What's going on?
George: Unspecified crisis from Bess.

Nick: You're the best.
George: That's what I keep telling everyone.

Nancy: This is the confession of Everett Hudson. You slaughtered 12 men on the Bonny Scot. You murdered your own accountant and made it look like a suicide, even set up a slush fund in your son's name so that he would take the fall for your crimes. If you agree, say nothing.

Everett: I didn't kill my wife.
Nancy: Why do you seem more upset over an accusation than you do about your own wife's death?

Ace: How's Mr. D holding up?
Bess: He's fine. He's received a crash course in the supernatural.

Gil: Don't [drink too much water]. It's tough to pee without your hands and that part of the gig, I did not sign up for.

Ryan: We need to access whatever accounts [Everett] had put in my name, and then we need to trace the money to whatever hit man he [paid to kill Celia].
Nancy: Right, but there are no recent payments.
Ryan: What do you mean, there's no recent payments?
Nancy: Maybe he hasn't paid yet.
Gil: Right, cause you know hit men who work on spec.

Tamura: I could actually use your help. You're a car guy, right? Do you know what kind of car this taillight might belong to?
Nick: Oh, yeah, that's def - definitely a really common taillight that, um, is easily confused with taillights from any number of cars. Or boats.
[Tamura writes down "Nancy's taillight" in his notebook]

Gil: You keep bringing up Everett, but maybe someone else wanted her dead. No offense.
Ryan: No offense taken. It's the truth.
Everett: Celia didn't have enemies. She had garden parties.

Nancy: I got Celia killed.
Ryan: No, you didn't.
Nancy: She was doing a favor for me.
Ryan: A favor? You were doing this to save Ace's life. She was doing this to keep her son of a bitch husband out of jail. That's how she did business.

Nancy: I was wrong about [Everett].
Ryan: No, you weren't wrong. Nancy, don't forget who my father is. You tied up the right guy. You just tied him up for the wrong murder.

Nick: Hey, Jake.
Jake: Hey, Nick.
Nick: Glad I caught you. I just wanted to thank you for helping me understand the real reason behind your complaint.
Jake: Aw, don't worry about it. You got a good heart.
Nick: Yup. But I lost focus, and I made the mistake of thinking my goal was to change your small mind.
Jake: Excuse me?
Nick: See, I always think that I have to go through people like you, like I've had to do before, like those who came before me have had to do because they had no other choice. But I have the means and the privilege to do things that they couldn't - like find a way around you.
Jake: Okay, I see what you're doing here. You're trying to make me the bad guy, and I-
Nick: No, no, no, no, no. You are the bad guy. But that's beside my point. What I'm trying to get you to see is that building across the street there because I just bought it for my youth center. I'm rich, Jake. Very rich. And according to the zoning committee, because the youth center's going to be more than 50 feet away from your café, you have no say if, when, or how it gets built.
Jake: You know, I just want to keep this neighborhood safe.
Nick: Then you'll be happy to know I partnered with Horseshoe Bay PD. And they are also committed to reinvesting in at-risk kids.
Jake: Was setting up your center in the next town over really that big of a deal?
Nick: Allowing kids to thrive in their own community is a big deal. Letting them know that they belong here is a big deal. And setting up a rival café in my new building, that's going to be a huge deal. So good luck, Jake.

Gil: What are you going to do about them killing your wife? I mean, you're a powerful man.
Everett: How do you think you survive long enough to become a powerful man? Banish emotion, pick your fights. Understand when you have leverage and when you're outmatched.

Ryan: Hey, detective, you got any news?
Tamura: It's a long shot, but I found a broken taillight by the yacht club. I believe it's from a car that belongs to Nancy Drew. Know anything about that?
Ryan: Uh, no. No, I don't. I'm sorry.
Tamura: Hmm. Any chance you've seen Nancy today?
Ryan: No, no. Have not have not seen her today, no.
Tamura: Right. Put Nancy on.
Nancy: Detective, you seem very concerned about my brake lights. I appreciate it, but they are fine.
Tamura: When did you and Ryan get so close?
Nancy: That's a weird question. What, do you want in on our book club or something?
Tamura: Well, I'm curious, since you're the one who got his father arrested for murder and then abruptly recanted your testimony, which seemed kind of coerced. And you had to know it would spring Everett from jail, and now he's the prime suspect in his wife's murder.
Nancy: Sorry, you're kind of breaking up.

George: I am sick of supernatural freeloaders cutting our lives short.

Nick: What's going on?
George: Hey. Nancy has a supernatural parasite attached to her, and I was hoping we could use the same technology as your ghost goggles to create a ghost camera to get a clear photo of it so we can figure out what it is and save Nancy's life.
Nick: Say what now?

Ryan: Well, what do we have here? The Black Crown tape.
Everett: Clever ruse, son. So I'm guessing it wasn't your idea.

Nancy: Hey, are you okay? You've had a lot to process. How are you still standing?
Ryan: I guess the trick is to not process.

Nancy: I thought it would feel different. I mean, I did it, I brought Everett to justice, and I don't feel anything. No anger, no satisfaction, not even relief. Just nothing. I don't know who I am anymore.

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Ace: Hannah texted a backup 12th century recipe for removing supernatural parasites. All we need is vinegar, a crucifix and some spoiled eggs.
Nick: We got plenty of those in storage, right?
George: We're almost out of crickets.

Carson: So the Wraith hitched a ride out on you because you stayed behind as bait? I want to have a talk about impulse control on the other side of this.

Ace: It's nourishment for our road trip. Amanda and I are going to take it to the next level as long as no one dies in the next 24 hours.

Gil: So you're going to ignore me and consider their insane plan? I don't know if it's the Wraith or if you've always had bad judgment.

Nancy: I'm getting worse because of you. The Wraith made it so I didn't see the worst parts of you. You put me down. You undercut me. You tried to isolate me from my friends, and they warned me.
Gil: You're not yourself right now. This is the Wraith talking.
Nancy: No, it is the Wraith's fault that we lasted this long.

Nancy: You drew a fish.
Ace: It's a lacrimatory.

Bess: I'll make some crisis nachos.

George: I don't want to think about how I'm not gonna see Jesse get her PhD in biology or Ted get hers in laser cats.

Myrtle: Well, I can pull off literally anything. I even have a zebra hookup.
Odette: To think, if we were born in a different time, we could only love in secret. And now we may have zebras at our wedding.

Ryan: If Everett decided to come after you, you know, for kidnapping Nancy, is there any way to stop it?
Carson: I did what I did. I'll live with the consequences if that happens.

Myrtle: You're not French?
George: Not when I can help it.

Nancy: Look, I really wish that it wasn't the case. But the Hudsons are my family. And something that they created in their past is going to kill me unless you help me. Our ancestor, Temperance Hudson, made this wraith, and it's feeding off of me. And she used those tools, so I need those to destroy it before it destroys me. Yeah, it's a lot to take in. I know. But I really don't have much time left.
Myrtle: You may borrow my heirlooms.

Carson & Ryan: How you feeling?
Nancy: Whoa, there's two of you.

Nancy: I know what you're thinking. How do we protect Carson, what about him? Well, I did a little digging and there's something that you could sign, Ryan, called a consent of parent to adoption.
Ryan: I already took care of it.
Nancy: You gave up your rights as my father?
Ryan: Yeah. But check this out. I got a sweet new spot on your couch in exchange.

Edited June 4, 2021 by ElectricBoogaloo

[bettername2come]

From 2x09 Bargain of the Blood Shroud:

Nancy: One was picked, the rest were just bashed open, so we're looking for an experienced thief with a short attention span.
Later
Nancy: Mind if I do the honors?
Gil: Be my guest. I do not have the patience. 
Nancy: I know. I have seen your work.

Nick: So this thing that could kill you, it was just in your locker?
George: It was locked in my locker.
Nick: Oh, okay. But not in a bank or a safe.

[bettername2come]

3x03

George: Yeah, 70 years' worth of people with the good sense not to mess with it. You know, it's not too late to leave it the heck alone. *Nancy opens the box.*  And you don't. You never do.

George: I thought you would've been bigger here.
Nancy: Guess my legend's purely coastal. 

Nick: Look, it's George's plucky sidekick!
 

Edited December 15, 2022 by bettername2come

[bettername2come]

3x04

Carson: How are you not a tech billionaire?

Ace: Who says I'm not?

[bettername2come]

3x06

George: You want to know why your vacuum keeps breaking? It's getting clogged from everything you keep sweeping under the rug.

Nancy: You want to come with me on a quest to track down a heart-freezing killing machine?
Ryan: See when you say it like that, you make it sound super cool.

Ryan: Here's something I never thought I was gonna have to ask, but which way to the monster cage?

[bettername2come]

3x07

George: Another petrified rat carcass? Ooh, this creature went all in on the morbid decorations. Ugh.

George: Uh-uh, not today, you heart-freezing, hat-wearing son of a...
Ace: I've been called worse. 

Ryan: What's up, party people? 
Ace: Holy balls. I have so many questions. Is that the 302 or the 390?

Ryan: Mr. D?. Why-why are you calling Carson Mr. D? I mean, what do you want me to call you? Mister... Mi... Wait. What is your last name?

Nancy: Oh, my God, my dads are teenagers. 
Ace: Don't worry. I speak the language. So, dude, where's my Carson?

Bess: A slight hiccup with the soul-splitter, but Nancy knows that time is of the essence, and any delay can cause side effects to your brain and your immortal soul...

[bettername2come]

3x12

George: She's trying to figure out how a guy who went missing last night fits into Temperance's master plan. 
Carson: So, basically a fact-finding mission. 
Ryan: As opposed to running into a house full of nail bombs. Call that growth.

3x14

Temperance: Now go tell the world's saddest album cover that I'll make the trade. 

Nancy: Is this hallucination supposed to stop me from killing you? Because it's only making me more determined.

Bess: Okay, I need advice. 
George: Unsolicited? Nancy's got plenty.

Carson: Because I choose to believe it is possible to live a good life even without a soul mate. And... 
Nancy: Maybe we get more than one?