[S06.E16: Family Meeting]

1 hour ago, nlkm9 said:

so ok--where is the cabin? does this mean Kate will be the only one of the big 3 living away from Rebecca??

 

I think the fact that they lost Kyle had a lot to do with it.

The cabin is someplace in the Poconos, which is about 100 miles from Philly and 220 or so from DC; so a reasonable drive for Randall and family.

As for Elijah and Madison, I got the impression that they were planning to move someplace in the Poconos or even to the old cabin.  We didn't hear where Elijah's family was from in NJ, but if they were in Alpine, where Randall and Beth used to reside, they'd be about 120 miles away.

So, Kate would be the only one who would need to fly to see Rebecca and probably wouldn't be able to swing a quick weekend visit too often.

[S06.E16: Family Meeting]

10 hours ago, gonzosgirrl said:

Kate got her Masters in education and is designing an arts curriculum for the state of California? Okaaaaay.

 

When that was said, my first thought was, "I wonder how big a campaign contribution Kevin had to make to buy that job for her?"  Because that is way more likely than that sour Kate, who didn't even have a bachelor's degree in education just a few years earlier, now, not only has a Master's, but is considered qualified to actually develop an entire educational program for California students.  I try to imagine her sitting in a committee meeting, as all these things are done by committee and pouting and whining and complaining when the other members don't do things her way.  I guess they're right when they say public education is failing these days.  I will concede it is possible that Randall called in a favor with one of his senator friends to get her the job; he got a California rep's lazy brother in law hooked up with some political lackey job back in PA in exchange for a gig for his unqualified sister in CA.

Also, Kate had far more romantic chemistry with Toby in their 2 minute phone call than she has had in all of the scenes she's had with Philip put together over 2 seasons.  Explain to me again why their divorce was inevitable while Philip is her soulmate.

[S04.E14: A Hard Way to Go]

On 5/7/2022 at 4:49 PM, Zonk said:

 

The pharma-lady said the Byrds didn't know and Camila seems to have bought it. Which seems contrived, but whatever...

 

But the Byrds themselves told Camila that her brother ordered the hit.  After all was said and done, Camila knew that wasn't true.

[Erin and Chad: Fifty Shades of Pink]

13 hours ago, 3 is enough said:

Just to clarify- you don't have to be board certified to practice medicine.  You do need a license which has to be renewed every year, and that does not require a test.  Residents are not board certified, but they are licensed.  

However, some insurance plans will not cover non-board certified doctors, and a lot of prospective patients will look for someone who is certified.  Also, I believe some hospitals may not hire or give admitting privileges to non-board certified physicians.  I think Chad's father practices family medicine, and if he is in a small town he may not be affected as much by his lack of certification, because people know him and there may not be many other local doctors.  No one knows if he failed the certification test and never tried again, or if he just never took it.

My daughter is board certified in both Internal Medicine and Infectious Diseases.  She has to retake the board exam every 10 years.  Technically, since she practices Infectious Diseases, she doesn't have to retake the IM boards, but knowing her, she will.

Most hospitals will not give staff privileges to physicians who are not board certified.  The only exception is for doctors who are in specialties that require a couple years of practice before you can take the exam.  Those are mostly surgical specialties that require proof that you're actually doing the procedures successfully before they will grant their seal of approval.  A doc who has taken the written exam but not the final part due to this would be called board eligible and that is the usual minimum requirement to get staff privileges at a hospital.  Even then, you're only considered board eligible for a set number of years (was 7 in OB/GYN when I was looking to get my boards) and then you either have taken and passed certification or you have to start again with the written exam. 

In my specialty, to remain certified, you have to annually do reading in specific topics in the specialty (you get to choose which ones based on your personal practice and interests) and take a quiz afterwards to prove you read it.  There's a written general exam every 6 years, but, if you do well enough on the annual requirements, you don't have to take it.  I took it once before the rules changed and it was pretty straightforward and I'd think most docs in practice could pass if with minimal prep.

It is possible to practice without board certification.  Certain specialties, like Dermatology, rarely need hospital privileges and the docs can earn a living working exclusively in the office.  Some urgent cares will hire docs without certification, a lot of residents who need extra cash go this route.  Many of the docs who work in institutions like prisons or jails don't have their boards.  

As far as a medical license, you do have to renew it every couple years and answer questions about your practice.  You also have to have a certain number of CME (continuing medical education) hours and provide proof if asked.  You cannot legally practice medicine anywhere without a license in the state where you're working.

My suspicion would be that Chad's father was not a very good doctor and didn't finish his residency because he was asked to leave.  I've only seen that happen a few times, and its usually a competence issue.  One of the guys I went to med school with was asked to leave an internal medicine residency after 2 years.  His last initial was B and everyone called him 'Killer B';  really bad.  He got a job as a prison doc and worked there for years.

[S11.E08: Episode 8]

11 minutes ago, libgirl2 said:

I was hoping that was the case. I must have missed that part. 

I agree, I worry that there is something more going on. 

All in all a satisfactory season finale. I'm going to miss this show. 

I think Sister Julienne might've told the doctors she was going back to Nonnatus, no matter what and then told everyone the white lie about her condition so they wouldn't worry or treat her differently.  She's the type to want to make the most of her time.  I think we'll learn the true story next season.

[S11.E08: Episode 8]

38 minutes ago, dubbel zout said:

Is that an Anglican tradition? It's lovely (and slightly creepy at the same time, IMO). I thought that whole part of Carole's story was handled so sensitively. Really well done.

It was a thing in Catholic cemeteries, too, back in the day.  They had a rule that, in order to be buried in consecrated ground (the cemetery was part of the church); the person had to be baptized in the faith.  Not baptized, no burial.  Catholic cemeteries often had a little non-consecrated corner of the cemetery where non-baptized, mainly infants, could be buried..  Not sure what the Anglican rule was, apparently post mortem baptism wasn't enough since Sister Francis and everyone else seemed to know about the burial with another person.  People who committed suicide were also refused burial in sacred ground because they had a mortal sin on their souls. They were also placed in the back, in the corner, with the stillborns.  Nowadays, as society has begun to understand mental illness, that is no longer the rule.  Same thing with stillborns, as far as I know, they can be buried in the main part of the cemetery wherever the parents choose.

[S11.E06: Episode 6]

11 minutes ago, MissLucas said:

It's not creepy at all but a means to help families cope with their loss. Research shows that removing stillborns ASAP like it was done for a good part of the 20th century can add to the trauma. So nowadays families are given the opportunity to say proper goodbye - and part of that can be to dress the stillborn in nice clothing. And if the family does not want a ceremony, photos are taken and archived for a while because sometimes they change their mind and appreciate a token of remembrance. These pictures are often a vital part of their mental health journey.

Incidentally this is something our ancestors knew - in the late 19th and early 20th century it was not unusual to photograph stillborns or deceased babies and keep these photos - often framed with dried flowers or embroidery - around. I've worked with such objects as a curator and I know people find them creepy but who knows what future generations will have to say about our urge to put a giant taboo on death.

 

Nowadays, there are actual professional photographers who will come to the hospital and take photos for families.  Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep is one well-known volunteer organization that does it.  They take photos of the entire family with the baby and anything else that the parents want documented.  They then present the family with a beautiful album.  Families are encouraged to bring clothing to the hospital for the baby.  If they're not able to do so, the hospital where I work as well as most others, has a supply of hand-knitted hats, booties and blankets for stillbirths of all sizes which the parents can keep afterwards.  As soon as feasible after the delivery, the nurses place a diaper and hat on the baby and wrap it in a blanket, it's part of helping the family cope with the moment as well as a sign of respect for the life that was lost.

I think the most important thing is to give the parent(s) a sense of control and to acknowledge their child however they wish.  Not all parents want to hold or see the baby initially, but, letting them know that the baby is theirs and can be with them in their room, in their arms, anytime they like is a big part of it.  I don't recall even having a mother who never saw or held her baby.

[S11.E06: Episode 6]

On 5/7/2022 at 12:20 AM, AZChristian said:

There are charities that take donated wedding dresses and turn them into pretty little shrouds for babies who are stillborn or who die very young.

I would assume some people have used the fabric from old wedding dresses to create christening gowns.

I have a friend whose mother was an accomplished seamstress and she did just that with her own wedding gown; creating beautiful christening gowns for the first child for each of her kids.  She knew that wedding gowns go out of style and it was not likely that her daughters or daughters-in-law would want to wear her dress, so she brainstormed an answer and her dress lives on after her.  Several of her grandkids are now grown and looking forward to someday having kids to wear their christening gown from Grandma.

[Jed! and Katey: Biblically Bunking Together]

16 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

I don't hate the name but it feels a little too cutesy and a little to contrived. Or not contrived - but for the life of me I can't find the word I'm looking for.

It feels like they're trying to be clever and insightful with their child's name; but we all know they're not either of those things.

[Who, What, When, Where?!: Miscellaneous Celebrity News 2.0]

11 hours ago, Dani said:

15 years

Richie started out with the Commodores whose first album was released in 1974.  They weren't too shabby either and they've been eligible since 1999, 23 years.

[S03.E19: Who Raised You]

2 hours ago, joanne3482 said:

I assumed there was a lot of  classism and racism there. Abishola is a nurse which is a "respectable" profession (and who saved Bob's life). Olivia is a bus driver. Abishola is a recent immigrant from Nigeria and Olivia is somehow has family from Mexico. I can see in her mind how Abishola would be "better."  Also, as mentioned above, it totally did not help at all that she was cutting on Douglas which she felt reflected poorly on her. (It also didn't make me like her either because Douglas isn't a trash human.) 

I think there is definitely classicism.  Abishola is obviously a professional with a degree.  In addition, her family, at least her parents and ex-husband, seem to be from the upper class in Nigeria.  Meanwhile, Olivia, as a bus driver, probably doesn't have a degree from a college or professional school and her family seems to clearly be working class.  I think Dottie will call her a gold digger at some point.

[Jill, Derick & the Kids: Moving On!!]

18 hours ago, CalicoKitty said:

And moving a piano is a huge expense.  You can't just pack a piano in a UHaul  if it is a good piano.  I had someone bring me a piano in a UHaul, and the sound board was broken in the process.(I did not know they were moving it themselves). And, as you said, professional piano movers are very expensive.  It is a real art.  I wanted a Clavinova, but "settled" for a Yamaha, and I am very pleased.  Very nice touch and sound, and just enough piano for what I want at this point in my life.

 

They do cost a fortune to move,  and, even a piano in good condition is going to need to be tuned after it is moved and that isn't cheap, either.  Sounds like the piano they had already needed considerable work to bring it up to a good standard.  Letting it go for cheap sounds like the reasonable thing to do.

I had a friend in med school who had been a classical piano prodigy as a kid and teen, he actually traveled all around Europe with a youth orchestra of up and coming young musicians when he was in high school.  His parents gifted him with a baby grand when he finished college (which was so much fun at parties and such; he had a great ear and could play anything after hearing it once.  Many a night spent drinking beer and singing along to Beatles tunes).  His wife hated the darned thing.  Aside from the fact that they were renters and had to find a place with a large enough living area to accommodate the thing, it was very expensive to pay professionals to move it and then to tune it once it was in place.  She used to joke that she wished he'd been a flautist.

[Joe & Kendra: Looking Forward To Side Hugs]

23 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

I think it would be pretty hard to get around inspections on new builds, so I'm guessing these are all by the book. They probably are very much like Jill and Derick's home, using builder grade interiors so they can be built on the cheap.

I'm not picturing small-town Arkansas having a lot of strict regulations for home construction, but I expect the Duggars meet whatever rules there are just like anyone else building low-end housing.  They're not building McMansions for the upper classes, but, that's ok, less wealthy folks need homes, too.

[S06.E15: Miguel]

19 minutes ago, 3 is enough said:

Of course on the show there are seemingly unlimited resources to care for Rebecca.  

I am so grateful that my mother was in Canada where the LTC facilities are government subsidized. Between her government old age pension and her investments money was not an issue.  I know the prices for LTC in the US are prohibitively expensive so people hold off getting help until they truly cannot manage any more.  It's part of the problem no one talks about, sadly.

That's one of my general complaints about the entire series: that, at least in present day and beyond, the family is so wealthy that they seemingly aren't affected by the sorts of everyday things the rest of us have to deal with almost daily.  They fly cross country at a moment's notice and for virtually every holiday, birthday and goat roping, Kate and Toby do a private adoption practically instantaneously, Rebecca wants to live in the Poconos, so Kevin just whips out his wallet and builds a luxurious family compound for all of them, Kate has a blind child and he's enrolled in all sorts of private enrichment classes practically from birth and apparently will be attending a private elite school for the blind.  Randall and Beth just quit their jobs when they're unhappy with them and Randall runs for office in a distant city and buys an apartment building there on a whim.  Beth starts her own business which fails due to COVID, but the family doesn't suffer any economic hardship at all, ever. It's a fairy tale for most people.

The vast, vast majority of elderly people in this country do not have access to the sorts of goods and services that might make their lives easier, but I guess the show doesn't want to address that aspect of it.

[Small Talk: The Welcome Mat]

What about turning the bookcase around so  it faces the wall?  You'd have to turn it back to get books for yourself, but at least, there were still be books to get.

[S06.E15: Miguel]

14 minutes ago, peeayebee said:

I think there might be some resentment. Miguel's dad might have felt like an underachiever compared to his son. But also, Miguel was straightening his hair. He brought a bottle of wine, "the good stuff," signaling, in his dad's eyes, that their traditional coquito wasn't good enuf. Maybe Miguel had told his parents about using an anglicized name to get a job. I think there were probably other little things that his dad interpreted as leaving behind his background, culture, family. Heck, maybe like with his wife Miguel was so busy working he wasn't visiting his parents and aunt very much. 

I agree, it also seemed that Miguel, being busy trying to climb the ladder at work, wasn't spending as much time with the family as his father would have wished. That, along with the fancy haircut, American accent and other signs that Miguel was becoming more 'American' than the rest of the family probably bugged his father; his dad might've even felt like Miguel was ashamed of his roots and wanted to forget his family and their struggles.

24 minutes ago, PRgal said:

One more thing:  Would the Big 3 have known the Rivas kids, considering that Jack and Miguel were really good friends?  I would have thought they would have played together when they were young. 

I'm sure they probably did, although I think that Miguel's kids were fairly young when their parents divorced and I presume that they didn't see much of their father, let alone his friends, after that, especially since it seems they moved to Houston soon afterwards.  Miguel's son certainly knew who Kevin was when he came to the door and not just because of Kevin's career.

[S04.E17: 60 Minutes]

15 hours ago, KaveDweller said:

The fertility doctor part has never made any sense to me. Going to her oncologist to ask about risks made sense. But the fertility doctor part was weird, especially for her and Gary to go back when they'd been trying for like a week. Do these people just have too much money and are looking for ways to use it up? Or are they that desperate to avoid work?

The fertility specialist never made sense since Maggie got pregnant without trying only a year or so ago.  Most would send her away and tell her to come back in 6 -12 months if she wasn't pregnant. Now, if she'd seen a specialist prior to chemo to look into freezing some eggs or she'd had a brief consult and the doc did some blood work to evaluate her ovarian reserve (not very accurate, but not much else to do) after she finished chemo, that would make sense.

For that matter, Gary should've been counseled as to the possibility of freezing sperm before he started chemo way back when.  I have a friend who had Hodkin's disease as a teen and whose mother insisted he go to the sperm bank even though he really didn't want to.  Lo and behold, almost 20 years later, his sperm got thawed out and he had a son.   This all started nearly 40 years ago, freezing sperm has been a thing for a long, long time.

In real life, no way these two are seeing a fertility specialist and having serial ultrasounds to monitor her eggs or any other such nonsense.  Amongst other things, even if she has insurance coverage for infertility treatment (many people don't), the insurer isn't going to pay for anything unless there is documented infertility.  At Maggie's age, it is one year of trying without success although, her history of chemotherapy might let her slip by after 6 months.  

This show has some of the worst medical storylines out there.  I'm still waiting for Eddie to be 'cured' of his paralysis.  I just know they'll do it.

[S04.E14: A Hard Way to Go]

12 hours ago, Johnny Dollar said:

The Byrdes aren’t really out after all. With Ruth being killed, the FBI and Camila will still need someone to launder their cash. And I would trust Omar before I would trust Camila to keep up their end of the bargain. Welcome back Marty!

Not only that, but Camila knows they lied to her about who killed Javi and she isn't likely to forgive and forget anytime soon.  They're screwed and they know it.

[They Suck: Worst TV Parents]

Anyone watching Ozark knows that Marty and Wendy Byrde are probably the worst parents ever.  It's bad enough they laundered money for a drug cartel, but they brought their teen kids into the business to assist them and eventually the kids discovered that their mother arranged a hit on their uncle and other fun stuff.

[All Episodes Talk: What's Up Doc?]

11 hours ago, Cloud9Shopper said:

I have to say upon watching I don’t understand why Abby was called to the ER to help with the preemie. She’s a nurse. I know they tried the Love’s Labor Lost-ish point that no other doctor was available, but they said the one doc had five minutes left on her break. They couldn’t get her? And there were doctors in with the baby in the trauma room. Maybe doctors have legally mandated breaks and have to take every second of them, I don’t know. It just seemed so pointless to ask a nurse to run to the rescue. Coburn was justified in reaming Abby for abandoning her patient and giving Mark those dirty looks.

I

In real life, the patient ready to give birth to the preemie would've been moved up to Labor and Delivery and had a nurse assigned to her from that staff.  Might've been Abby, might not.  The ER would not be able to force an L&D nurse to come down there to work; nurses are assigned to specific areas where they are to work; they don't get dragged to other areas in the middle of a shift for stuff like this.  Abby's insistence that the mother and baby remain in the noisy, busy ER rather than be moved to the labor floor or postpartum unit was idiotic, too. There are undoubtedly areas set aside for just that type of situation, where the parents could've had a peaceful, quiet, pleasant environment to spend time with their child and had staff attending them with specific training in the area of helping parents through the loss of an infant.  This was the start of Abby's downhill slide into being the expert at all times about everything and everyone while repeatedly demonstrating that she was completely wrong about most things.

The hospital where I work actually has a couple of small rooms for parents attached to the NICU with rocking chairs, comfortable seating, a private bathroom, even a small coffee maker and a mini-fridge with snacks where parents can spend significant amounts of time with their child in a circumstance like this or even just have some peace and privacy while their child is being cared for in NICU.

And, no, doctors do not have scheduled breaks and are expected to work as they are needed.  If the ER is busy and they need help, then nobody gets a break until things quiet down.  Cutting a break short because something happens that needs attention is a common occurrence.

[S06.E15: Miguel]

I do hope we see Miguel again, if only in Rebecca's fading memories.  

I also loved Miguel's conversation with his mother, who spent her entire adult life taking care of her disabled sister.  Her words about loving someone without expectation of return and how she wanted to be the one to care for her sister; it wasn't a burden but an act of love obviously hit home with him and shaped his approach to caring for Rebecca as she declined.  Just a beautiful scene and demonstrated how and why Miguel became the man he was with Rebecca.

[S06.E15: Miguel]

1 minute ago, Ohiopirate02 said:

I appreciated both of them being adults who knew what they wanted and laid it all out there.  

It was a really beautiful tribute to a deep and lasting love.  I did like the fact that Beth saw it all before the Big 3 did and was totally on the Miguel/Rebecca bandwagon.

[Sweet Fellowship: Duggars and Friends (aka the Bates Family and Other Featured Families Thread)]

23 minutes ago, smallfry said:

In the cold weather my son never wore a winter coat as he got to be about 13 - 14 years old. He did wear a sweatshirt. Tessie looks cold and I think she would wear something. I still think BME told her not to wear one so everyone could see her new outfit. IMHO

If nothing else, BME could've held the obligatory photoshoot indoors knowing that the girls didn't have coats or if she didn't want them wearing them.

[Small Talk: The Prayer Closet]

3 minutes ago, Liddy52 said:

I agree 100%. I have never given nor received such a gift, but if I did receive one I would only consider it a gift if it was a charity that I had a true interest in. And if I was giving such a gift, I would make very sure that it was a charity the recipient really cared deeply about.

For my 60th birthday, my sisters threw a surprise party at a local establishment for me and invited about 75 people.  They knew that I already had too much stuff and didn't need more; I also am single and self-supporting and have no problems spending money on myself.  They asked the guests to bring a card and, if they wanted, they would collect donations to the church group that I go to El Salvador with each year.  That was perfect for me, IMO.  We collected about $700 which paid the salary of the nurse in the clinic we built down there for 6 months.  Just what I always wanted and didn't know I needed.

BTW, nurses make about 10 bucks a day down there, a bargain.

[Small Talk: The Prayer Closet]

On 5/1/2022 at 12:06 PM, BetyBee said:

You are on a roll, @Mindthinkr! Especially happy for your best friend's granddaughter!

Question: Has anyone else ever been kind of annoyed when someone chooses a charitable gift in your name for a holiday or birthday present? This is the second time we've received (from 2 different relatives) a donation to disperse funds with this charity. It's ok, but it requires choosing a recipient and a lot of emails to follow. Maybe it's just me, but I like to choose my own charities. 🤷

I think it is tacky unless you absolutely know that the recipient supports that particular charity and that he/she is ok with that as a gift.  Otherwise, you're just donating to a charity that YOU like and killing two birds with one stone by pretending it is a gift to someone else while getting the tax writeoff.

Some friends, who were instrumental in organizing several of the mission trips I did in Peru, held a party for their 40th wedding anniversary and they made it clear that they wanted no gifts.  I decided that they might enjoy knowing that some nice Peruvian family got a llama in celebration of their anniversary and I arranged it using Heifer International.  My friend loved that gift because 1. it wasn't something she was going to have to display, dust or store and 2. she loved Peru and its people and was devoted to trying to help the poor there.  That's the only kind of donation gift that makes sense to me.