Rebecca berkowit

The Che thing is different. Anthony was not upset just at being called the wrong gender, like Che was. He was upset specifically at being called a woman for being the receptive partner. That’s not about actually questioning a man’s gender identity, that’s about consigning a man to what you believe is a lesser role, or a less “manly” one. Being the receptive partner, as women are, is considered by some men to be lesser, and it’s considered that way BECAUSE it’s something women are. Calling someone a woman, or a pussy, throwing like a girl, crying like a little girl, etc., it’s always an insult. By contrast, “Be a man,” “man up,” etc, is a good thing. It’s unfair, and we don’t even realize how often we do it. Anthony here is just one example. You’re right, it’s misogyny. Taking the receptive role should not be considered lesser, and being called a woman, as an insult, for doing it should be obsolete and nonsensical.

Exactly! And what’s so wrong with being a woman anyway? ;). It’s not an insult, or it shouldn’t be. Still, if Anthony doesn’t want to do a specific sex act, that’s his right. I wasn’t sure where his refusal was coming from, but I was uncomfortable with the other guy’s insistence that he try it, or that he’d like it. It seems like something you either know you would like, or you wouldn’t. I’m saying this as a woman, of course. This kind of triggered me. Maybe it’s different with gay men, and maybe Anthony’s objection was purely based on outdated roles and not what he liked or didn’t like. That joke was so dumb! Why would she be waiting for it to get hard? Or trying to get it hard? That’s not necessary, it just does that on its own in the course of things. Or was Che implying that it doesn’t get hard because it’s not a dick? Newsflash, Che. Erectile tissue is erectile tissue.

That is a charitable explanation. I think this was just someone’s idea of what someone who was a married woman’s first non-straight partner would talk about. If it didn’t fit the actual relationship, who cares?

Here’s (one of) the problem with the writing on this show. They make arcs for the characters that are supposed to extend over the season, such as “Miranda falls for Che, goes so far as to move to California, and then eventually realizes she belongs at home,” or “Carrie gets back with Aidan, goes so far as to buy a new house, and then eventually realizes it’s not going to work.” In the first place we, the viewers, don’t need the “goes so far as,” or the “eventually.” We can see it’s not a good idea from the word go. The initial premise is flawed. Of course, that’s true in a lot of shows, that’s what drama is, without conflict it’s not interesting. But the rest of it is not executed properly. The middle is just so much filler. The “going so far” part is too far; it’s just not believable for the character or any actual human being. The end is no great payoff, either. The characters may “eventually” learn from their mistakes, but we learn nothing. They just come off as dumb people doing things nobody would ever do. These aren’t arcs so much as straight dead ends. Foregone conclusions. If we can see it, why can’t they? The old show used to at least string us along in a believable fashion with the progression of the relationships. Good stories do that. This one, you know where it’s going and you can’t believe they’re wasting so much of our time with the getting there.

I was amazed at how Steve had moved on, with his talk about “all that stuff that happened with Miranda,” like it was years ago. It seemed like it was only weeks ago (it was only like two episodes!).

You make a good point. Che is not written as a character who would be attracted to someone like Miranda. That’s probably because the writers did not intend for that to happen, and it only did because of Cynthia Nixon. Once Cynthia intervened, they went ahead with the romance but didn’t bother to change Che’s character into someone who would be a better fit. I really don’t see how they could have, and kept Che as Che. And yes, I do think they were trying to rehabilitate Che, and it almost was working. But that comedy set single-handedly destroyed any hope of that, at least for me. I never want to see Che on my Tv again. It was just a hateful, gratuitous screed against someone who had done nothing to deserve such treatment. Miranda may have not been a good fit for Che, and she may have been shitty to Steve, but she wasn’t ever mean to Che. (Also, did Che say something about “I’d rather slam my dick in a door?” Was that metaphorical?)

I don’t think there WAS a point to the LTW story. I honestly think they just didn’t know what to do with the character. She’s basically a Black Charlotte. They tried the mother in law angle. They couldn’t think of more. I suppose she could’ve had a medication abortion, but why would she keep that from her husband? He was willing to talk about it, she’s the one who shut it down And, yes, Carrie is an idiot. She keeps calling it “our place,” when Aidan made it clear she shouldn’t be buying it just for him. He looks uncomfortable. And how can it be “their place” when he’s only there sometimes, and she owns it? I mean, Carrie was always a bit like this with men, but this time it just doesn’t ring true that she would have learned nothing, that she would still be behaving like this in her 50’s. It’s pretty basic that you don’t move that fast with someone. Shes like willfully not seeing or hearing stuff, about him, about his kids, nada. She’s so obviously deluding herself, but it feels like the writers are deluding us into thinking it’s totally normal for her to behave like this, that we all delude ourselves when we are in love, and she will eventually realize. We do delude ourselves, but not like this, not over the age of about 25-30, not with her life experience.

I get why Aidan is beating himself up thinking he should’ve been there. I don’t think that’s true, I think Aidan is entitled to a life of his own, and Wyatt needs help to see that. I think even if Aidan had been there, the kid would still be messed up and getting into some pretty bad trouble. But it’s understandable Aidan feels that way. And, knowing Carrie, she won’t understand that.

Wow. For the FIRST TIME Carrie is worried about Aidan? (Or, rather, herself with Aidan). He has kids! One of whom is not doing well psychologically! Wyatt obviously needs help dealing with the divorce and dad’s new relationship. He also seems to have an alcohol and impulse-control problem. (Why did he go to the farm if he knew Aidan wasn’t there? I guess 14 year olds don’t think so clearly sometimes, that’s to be expected.) And all she can say is that the broken bones will heal, she can’t even see why Aidan’s upset about his kid’s issues. And to think, I was predicting he’d finally come to terms with the apartment thing, and his own role in the demise of the relationship with Carrie. I was thinking he’d show up at the Last Supper. (I hate the way he said he was never setting foot in the apartment when they weee line for Che’s concert. He had this flirty tone like he was whispering sweet nothings). I predict he DOES show up, and he tells her he accepts what happened, but that they can’t see each other again because of his kids. Then they can have “closure,” on both the relationship and on John Corbett’s commitment to the series. I guess she’ll stay in the Gramercy Park apartment, because she didn’t just sublet to Lisette like a normal person would, she sold it, at too low a price. Even this show wouldn’t make Lisette give it back. Lisa- I have no idea what on earth they were trying to do with this stupid pregnancy. They weren’t doing an abortion plot, obviously. (But they were sure to have her share her - and the show’s - liberal bona fides by saying the totally clunky dialogue about “of course, I am grateful to have that option.”) And then they go and take the time-immemorial TV way out of an unplanned pregnancy, a convenient miscarriage! So what was the point? For her to realize she has too much on her plate? For her husband to realize he should help out more? And why didn’t she, once she realized her hubby didn’t actually get the vasectomy eight years ago, get an IUD or something? Did he not tell her? Was this the first she’s hearing about it? That’s unconscionable, but if that’s the case, why did it take till now to get pregnant again? Nya/Seema: I appreciate that this episode managed to include all of the characters. But these two did very little. Nya…bought a stroller and listened to Miranda. Like that she got a little snippy with Miranda about her exes. Seema…said I love you and then was promptly shut down so Carrie could talk about HER problems. These characters, and actresses, deserve better. Perhaps their own spinoff. Miranda: she’s upset about SKIPPER? What about her husband of 20 years and the father of her child? On the other hand, I think Carrie was giving her too much grief about not seeing Steve now. She shouldn’t have to go see his new restaurant, they’re divorced. I do think she left him very abruptly and took off with Che, if that’s what is meant by “cutting him off,” and I do think she shouldn’t be afraid to show up to the Last Supper if he’s there. (Che is a different story, which I will get to.) Glad Miranda’s new job is going well. Still not believable that she is only an intern, they could’ve given her a legal clerkship. (They probably never thought of it). The woman took five weeks’ maternity leave? Crazy. (The old joke of referring to your baby as your “new boss” is just so cringe. You know who your new boss is? Your old boss. Who wouldn’t let you stay home more than five weeks with A NEWBORN BABY.) Charlotte- hilarious. I can always relate to her storylines. She did have a life before! Still, no way I’m leaving my job to run home and bring something to my kid when she should’ve packed it the night before. This is a lesson every kid needs to learn, hopefully it happens only once. You forget it, you get the F. And no way I’m asking my husband to do it, either, or giving him a guilt trip about it. How many nebbishy henpecked jokes can they make with this otherwise successful, smart and assertive cutthroat lawyer? So cute that she “tamed” him! (Barf). Anthony: Sure, nobody should say they are, or the other person is, “the woman” in a gay relationship, that’s outdated and offensive to gay men (and women in general). But, if Anthony doesn’t want to do a particular activity, he should not have to. I wouldn’t want to do anal, and if somebody insisted that I do so for some political reason I’d be out of there. (Of course, I’m not a man, it might feel different for them, but I imagine that not all gay men are into that.) I guess the other guy felt like Anthony was just objecting on philosophical grounds, because he is “a top.” The guy seemed to think Anthony would enjoy it if he could just get over his old-fashioned beliefs about what it meant. But maybe he just wasn’t comfortable being penetrated. That wasn’t made clear. His preferences should be respected. Physical tastes don’t change just because the politics have. Stanford! I thought it was disrespectful to Willie Garson for them to have Anthony make fun of him. Still, I thought the send off of making him transcend to a higher plane of existence was poignant. And now…Che! First of all, are we going to get a clunky reminder every episode that Che’s pronoun is “They,” and that so many people “just …don’t …get it…man?” Enough. We want to watch a show, not a polemic. Also, Che’s standup is not funny, nor was Cheryl’s. (Are we to take from this that part of the reason Che was unhappy as Cheryl and eventually came out as non-binary was because Cheryl had to diet to please men? There must be more to it than that.) Che’s set about Miranda was just awful. Talking about how inept Miranda was sexually? Even male comics don’t talk like that about women. (Women comics sometimes talk about how men are inept, but not quite like that). And it wasn’t “just comedy,” either, no matter what Che says. It came off as how Che really felt, and it was vile. Che broke the cardinal rule of comedy- you can be mean, as long as you are funny. It wasn’t funny. Miranda was totally right to be hurt and to tell Che off. Che is just awful, selfish, unfunny, and mean. Full stop. But of course, Toby thinks Che can do no wrong. I assume we are supposed to side with Toby? Sorry, no. I do like the co worker in the vet’s office.

I believe Che was intended as perhaps a substitute for Stanford. A minor role, like with Anthony. A peripheral pal for Carrie who was not one of the girls and could give a different perspective about a different identity every now and then. Not one of the leads. Then CN intervened. Maybe if they’d gone with the original plan we could have seen more early interaction with Che and Carrie during the first season, with the podcast. Now the character, who had been elevated to a main with the Miranda romance, just seems like one of Miranda’s castoffs who is still hanging around for some reason, a superfluous main character, and so the writers have retconned this Carrie friendship for us. But they didn’t put in the work to make it credible.

Same, more with the first pregnancy than the second for some reason. But not so sleepy that I fell asleep while getting dressed. Menopause makes me exhausted but unable to sleep (hence the exhaustion ). YMMV

I have checks but I hardly ever use them, I do Venmo/Card for everything. If I were in Carrie’s situation, I would’ve asked Enid if there was a website where I could donate. I’m lazy like that. I did not pick up on the puzzle thing being related to autism at all. I just thought the kid was difficult. Every family has one, and they’ll tell you who it is. It’s usually a kind of a chicken-egg problem, which came first, the kid being difficult or them describing him that way. That’s what I’ve noticed. I didn’t think they intended to keep Aiden around long enough for his kid to get his own autism subplot. I thought the mere fact that he HAD kids and had to spend some time with them would be the dealbreaker for Carrie.

She said she doesn’t want to throw them away ANYMORE. Meaning, after Steve. :) I hope it’s to leave Aiden and not buy that ridiculous new apartment.

Look, I’m not a big Che fan. But Che works at a vet’s office, I believe that’s where the kittens were taken originally. Presumably they were examined/treated there. I don’t think Che found the kittens in the street. Maybe I’m remembering it wrong.

Trey was impotent = Charlotte PAID for the apartment. (I don’t think she meant it literally, but it’s a funny line, you have to admit.)

They won’t do this. Look what they did when Miranda got pregnant with Brady. They talked about abortion but ultimately didn’t do it. It was clear the writers definitely wanted a baby storyline for her, even though a baby made no sense for the character. (Was CN pregnant in real life and that’s why they did this?). I think they wouldn’t have written a pregnancy for Lisa if they didn’t want an actual pregnancy/baby storyline. This isn’t a realistic or political-minded show, and they love the drama. What could be more dramatic than a new baby for someone who doesn’t want one?

I think, unfortunately, that Lisa is indeed pregnant. Why? The hack writing. She was super super tired, to the point of randomly falling asleep while dressing herself. Whenever they show that on Tv, the character is usually pregnant. Or when they show nausea/vomiting/fainting. Pregnant. People on Tv never just notice a missed period and take a test, like the rest of us. (That symptom shows up first and is a pretty good indicator). They just go about their business until the vomiting starts. Then it dawns on them. This is a weird TV convention I hate. I get why they do it, it makes it more dramatic. They wouldn’t have written her being so, so, tired if they didn’t intend for her to really be pregnant, by the laws of hack Tv.

My issue was that you don’t usually hire a Kosher caterer for a few guests who happen to be Kosher. It seemed like a very mixed party. It seemed very much just done so they could make the “joke” (I use that term very loosely) with the stereotypical couple. The guy most likely would’ve gotten snipped after the third kid.

Gramercy Park. Everyone who lives there gets a key to the park, nobody else can use it. It’s a special, very high-end neighborhood. Agreed. There’s also something weird about the Giuseppe guy’s accent. Is he Italian in real life, or is he doing a fake accent? It sounds exaggerated.

Lily is into him because the writers said “wouldn’t it be funny if two of the girls’ kids had sex and they had to deal with that.” That’s the level of writing on this show now.

Golden Girls did it too, with Blanche. Apparently it’s quite common for almost-50 year olds to miss one period and assume they’re pregnant. Not. It doesn’t happen that way.

I still don’t get these people, and the writing is bad. Carrie/Aiden: why is Aiden too stupid to understand the rules about how they’re not supposed to be in Che’s apartment? Why is he being written like a dumb hick? Anyway, so it at first seemed that with being kicked out they had finally wised up to the fact that if he wasn’t going to come into her apartment, it wasn’t going to work. (Che even said this directly. Even Che, whose own relationship with Miranda made no sense and was a train wreck, can see it.). But, noooooo, the writers’ solution is for Carrie to buy a 4 bedroom apartment that costs millions of dollars, (from the dead husband she apparently never loved), in a neighborhood she doesn’t like, so she can have room for hypothetical future stepsons who she’s met once, who will be going to college soon, and who don’t even like her now? Moving too fast. Way too fast. Again, no adult would behave like this. Why can’t they have an honest conversation about what happened before? It’s an apartment, not the Amityville Horror. Something along the lines of “I know a lot of bad stuff happened here, but we built this apartment together, this is a new time, we can make it our own.” ? Why can’t Carrie have the balls to say “look, if you can’t come into my apartment, we can’t be together,” and they break up? Then you can have them eventually get back together after Aiden makes a similar speech to the one he made at the end of the episode, about how they are going to have problems, but they’re not the same people, and life is short, and he really wants to be with her. As it was written, it looked like he was kind of like “you’re on your own with this apartment, babe, don’t do it for me.” She IS doing it for him. What is he doing? Is she an idiot? Was what happened before so bad, and so entirely her fault, that she’s got to literally keep in paying for it, forever? That’s not how relationships work. Carrie is obviously going to sublet to Lissette, so they still have the apartment when it doesn’t work out. Just like they did with having her sublet from Che. She will always have that apartment. She has shown no signs about being ready to leave it, despite the voice over at the end. It’s all about Aiden. She was always like this with men. The ex-wife was right to be concerned that she would stupidly write about the sons. Although I don’t buy that she would want to have a sit-down about it, or that it would go so well. Wexleys- surprised by the pregnancy. Why are they introducing a baby into this show about post-menopausal women and their lives now? How much younger than Charlotte is Lisa supposed to be? Why is Lisa’s plot (until the pregnancy) identical to Charlotte? (Husband can’t deal with wife’s work schedule, expects wife to cater to him and kids, wife tired of it). Is that why they had to introduce the new baby, to distinguish them? Harry/party plot: total cringe. MPK frustrates me so with his whole attitude toward anyone of a different ethnic background from him. He should stick to what he knows. is “Jew” the only think MPK thinks when he sees Harry? Why does the “funny” conflict have to be over Kosher catering? They literally couldn’t think of anything else Harry, a person, might have trouble with, being suddenly thrust in the role of event planner when Charlotte started working? Maybe literally ANY other problem with the menu, or the timing? Why the caricatured old Jewish couple obsessed with pork? Does he have no other friends? Why does an event he hosts at his house have to be strictly Kosher? (Is the Goldenblatt family Kosher? I was not aware of that. If Harry is, he should know of a good caterer who doesn’t make mistakes). Is this an event for the Orthodox community? The Jewish community? If it’s just a meet-and-greet he’s hosting to introduce Wexley to all the people he knows, (which I believe it is) then the whole thing is ridiculous and would never happen. You either hire a Kosher caterer if it’s for a Kosher group, or, if you’re a person who happens to be Jewish and it’s a meet and greet for all of your friends and acquaintances, (as evidenced by the presence of Miranda, Carrie, Anthony, etc.) you cater it and people either eat what you serve, or they eat before they get there if they really are super observant. (You might consider just not serving pork or shellfish if you want to be considerate, more than one faith doesn’t permit that and people are allergic). People who keep Kosher can totally cope with attending parties which are not. You don’t hire a kosher caterer because you’ve invited some Jewish people. Nobody is going to obsess about how the fake pork tastes too good not to be real, or complain to other guests. Nobody is going to serve mock-pork dumplings anyway. This is offensive and stereotypical, especially that whining old couple. (They’re straight out of Mrs. Maisel’s in-laws territory.) What were their names? Stan and Marsha? Something typical like that? Please. Charlotte- Victor Garber doesn’t seem into her, and Harry being this jealous is totally out of character for his nebbishy self as written (see above). Garber just seems like a horn dog who is into anything that moves and has several failed marriages to show for it. If they try to put Charlotte with him, that’s a big fail. Charlotte is not that stupid. Or is she… Which brings me to…Lily/Brady- could see that one a mile away when Miranda asked them to meet. They’re NOT actually cousins, and it sounds like they hardly ever see each other, especially if the last time was on a ski trip a couple of years ago. OF COURSE they slept together. There is no doubt. Charlotte and Miranda would have to be stupid to believe they didn’t. Why are these characters being written as so stupid? She was leaving his room without pants, FFS. If I got a text that my teenage daughter was “sleeping over” at a boy’s house, I’d go pick her up. No matter how well I knew the mother, or how long the kids had grown up together. I wouldn’t even leave them alone in a house together. Again, are these people stupid? Why? Also, is Miranda wearing men’s suits and ties now because she’s into women? Did she always dress like that? Nya- glad she’s having sex. Tinder would not be for me, I couldn’t have sex with someone who just walked in my door like a pizza delivery. (Isn’t that every old porno plot?) Seema- so the guy IS Indian, because of course, this is MPK. (Again, not that he can’t be Indian, but it still smacks of MPK’s weirdness about different ethnicities and his tendency to see people only on that basis). The actress is funny, she saved this plot. The movie the guy directed seems like a takeoff on one that was really big this year, forgot the name. How very topical. Indian=Bollywood in the mind of MPK. Why can’t he write people just as people? Why is everything with the non-WASP characters ABOUT their ethnicity?

I always thought the original series went wrong when it doubled down and went all - in on Big and Carrie as the endgame, and this happened fairly early on. The series, and the column on which it was based, was conceived as a being about how you could be a single woman and have fun dating and working in the city, and how marriage didn’t need to be your goal, now or ever. They had these guy of the week stories, and they were frank about sex, not just “ romance.” And then it went and effed that up with her chasing after Big. By the end, everyone was paired up in the same fairy-tale ending that has been sold to women since time immemorial. Blech. Still, Chris Noth may be an alleged offender personally, but there is no reason to erase him or retcon Big from the series. Big was a big deal for Carrie. She was a total dick to Aidan because of him.

I live in a neighborhood that has a real problem with air bnb and is always trying to ban short-term rentals. Some buildings are even being purpose-built as places for people to buy “investment properties” to rent out as an air bnb. It’s marketed that way, and they sell it as something you can use for vacation, but also rent out when you’re not using it. The result looks like a hotel, but with a million individual owners for each individual room. Usually there is no “front desk”, manager, housekeeping, security, or any type of central organization to the building, like a hotel would have. There’s no requirement that a manager even be on-site. The city is unsuccessfully trying to ban such buildings, but currently there is no restriction on building them for that purpose. Recently, I stayed in an apartment building in another city that I rented for two weeks through air bnb. (So, yes, I’m part of the problem, I realize, but I needed something for a long-term stay.). The building seemed to be full of air bnb guests, we didn’t see any real tenants. Everyone was always coming and going with suitcases, and there was no security at all at the entrance, so you never knew who you might be letting in when you opened the door for yourself. You could tell the building had been originally built as a nice condo, it had a gym and some common areas and a desk for security at the entrance, but all of this had been abandoned. The whole vibe of the building was one of extreme disrepair and absentee ownership. That’s why nice buildings don’t want it. You’re better off renting an actual vacation home or staying in an apartment-hotel or corporate housing that offers long-term stays but is operated by a single entity in the hospitality business that knows how to do that.

My dad was buried in his own clothes per his wishes. We are reform, but the Jewish funeral home did allow that. (Immediately after death they also did the traditional ritual with washing and sitting with the body and wrapping it). But, yeah, absolutely no open casket at the service. I would’ve bought it if she’d said “let Carrie choose the outfit for me to be buried in.” And I agree MPK has no clue. The conversion was just for a funny plot device, nothing more.