Landsnark

I can do without Mika ever pretending to have a British accent, or talk about sports. She ruined Liverpool's unbelievable victory for me. She is the worst.

What did Heidi have to say?

Ah, she's not actually being mindful in that pic. It actually was a photo op. I oversnarked. I've been saying for 10 years that she needs a ton of therapy.

You know she's super serious about mindfulness because she hired a photog to take a picture of her faking mindfulness so you'll know how serious she is.

I'll tell you what. Mika Knows The Value of that knotted navy top she's wearing this morning. It weaponizes her bewbs. goodness gracious.

I figured it out. The off-screen mumbles of... "mmmm..." "yup" "oh yes. yes" "incredible" "MMMmhhhMM!" "uh huh" "hard to believe" "My God" "well, yeah" She's eating a cupcake.

At a restaurant recently the menu listed calories of a single glass of wine. And it became clear why I can't lose these love handles. 1 glass is 250 to 400 calories. I'm a tall drink of wine so 4+ glasses of wine is no big deal, but that can be 1600 calories, which is 60% of what I need in a day. Is Mika on a diet currently? She was a big no-soda proponent around 5 years ago. Her thoughts on diet and nutrition back then were facile at best, and embarrassingly uninformed at the least. And all of her comments were fueled by judgment. If you ate sugar, you were stupid. If you drank soda, you were stupid. She'd mock and deride. That is when I realized she was an idiot. She had a bully pulpit from where she could help educate and inform and set an example. Instead, she did the least amount possible and didn't educate herself on the science of nutrition and grew tired of dieting because it irritated Joe Now, how was her exercising destructive? Did she go into details?

It does boggle the mind. Why do people watch this show? Each of the candidates should get on the gab shows as frequently as they can, but some of the candidates, like Beto, are pounding the pavement. He did 5 stops yesterday in Virginia. He's been twice here in Charleston in the past 2 weeks. He may not have stops in DC or NYC on his schedule. But he ought to call in every morning and Trump it up. He's far too earnest and square to be very entertaining, and would never draw Trump's ratings... but he and Mayor Pete ought to call in frequently. Mika hates Beto, so that would make for awesome TV... for my own morning-snark anyway. Biden would be ratings dynamite - they should get him a chair with his name on the back. Call the show Morning Joe Biden.

So Buttigieg raises less money than Beto over a longer period of time, and the only story is how Buttigieg is amazing because he raised so much money. Less money than 3 others, though. "He's 4th YEAH! Come on our show mayor pete!" These two idiots. So cynical. So transparent. So so so shallow. Of course they had a meeting to discuss who to back. Who would gain them notoriety. Just like they did with Trump. They are going to try to put their thumbs on the scale so that Buttigieg's notoriety runs through them. re: the Notre Dame fire, they do tragedy terribly. It's embarrassing really.

McCaskill pretending not how to say Buttigieg for a while was a bad look. Then she went on and on how her daughter donated $3 to Buttigieg's campaign. Bizarre. I have a feeling all of that was shade thrown at Pete for some personal reason.

About Biden, Johnathan Capehart said [essentially], "He always hugs me, slaps my back, puts his arm over my shoulders. I never thought it was sexual. It's sort of in my personal space, but it's who he is. I'm not complaining." At a conference this week I met a client and extended my hand to shake hers, and she hugged me, and I said in my head, "ok, we're hugging now?" I went to hug another client and she kissed my cheek and I thought, "Ok, this is where we are?" I don't presume they are wrong. I presume I'm uptight and awkward. All three ways of greeting are appropriate and normal. The women complaining about Biden are NOT normal. Mika's right. This, unchecked, is the death knell of the Me Too movement. Also it's ammunition for anti-feminists. It does way more harm than good.

I think I may win Clinton Bingo this morning. Joe just blamed Hillary for the Russians invading Ukraine. Even though she hadn't been secretary of state for 3 years at the time.

JOE IS BLOVIATIN' ON HARDBALL! Imagine my astonishment to see that he's interrupting both my breakfast and my dinner.

Who was the woman sitting to the left of David Ignatius today? Older lady. Never seen her before. There was a great deal of sober outrage this morning. I didn't hear the whole conversation but I presume Fox and trump are now leveling accusations at media outlets and specific people, and this morning's panel was reacting to that? Joe was all over the place. Like a volcano with ants in its pants.

A full week of accept Jebus as your lord and savior. We get it Joe. You church it up. A sweet dig at Obama for saying "We are our future" or something referring to it as blasphemy. Then saying how Dems calling him "Black Jesus" was blasphemy. Then he blames the invasion of Iraq on Democrats. So much bullshit down in their bunker today it must smell like a stable. Thematically appropriate for Joe's evangelical soul, presumably.

The last 8 minutes of the show was a nearly perfect microcosm of the show in general. At once hilarious and cringeworthy. Frustrating and informative. Joe at his best and worst. Mika just at her worst. The chief editor at Random House and author, Benjamin Dryer, was on to talk about his book about English usage. Funny guy. Mika introduces him and then immediately turns in her seat giving the expert on English usage her back, and she doesn't look at him, instead looking up into Joe's face. Her body language suggests she's intimidated by the guest. Super weird and uncomfortable. Joe was obviously familiar with the material (and as he begins talking, Mika's back is still to her guest and she's making those "meep moop mumble mumble" sounds - SO weird) and talked about the idiosyncrasies of approved English usage and how it's a tough language. And then he said that guest Meachem and guest Walter Isaacson would be intimately familiar with Dryer's topic because they are accomplished authors, and, Isaacson is a prof. Also published on that panel but ignored, one Mika Brzezinski. 5 or 6 times an author. Joe didn't even look at her. Super weird and uncomfortable. Meachem praises the book. Dryer tells some great anecdotes. Joe chips in. Kicks it to Isaacson who has an interesting question on split infinitives. I'm watching intently, eager for the answer. BUT... Mika interrupts in order to get involved. Super weird and uncomfortable. She says so excitedly, "It's just like this weekend when I helped you with your article! The one in the Post. I started a sentence with "But, " and it didn't make it. Then I tried "However," and it didn't make it. hurr hurr." This broke the uncomfortability scale. Yeesh. Dyer just ignored her and tried to answer Isaacson before time ran out.

Mayor Pete was outspoken about his faith in that segment, and is gay too, so Joe thought he'd poke around in there to see if he could make some news. He wasn't asking Pete to pass a litmus test. The tone of that segment is getting a little distorted here. He was giving Pete some space to be honest and open and to drop some philosophical bombs. Pete did incredibly well. He'll never be President, but he needs to play a much larger role in American public life. We need a lot more of him.

To be clear, Joe thought when he asked Pete about capitalism, Pete would necessarily have to tapdance around "socialism" in order to pander to Bernie Bros like that twit Warren and most other Dem candidates. (Scandinavian countries aren't socialist, fwiw. They're capitalist, with some social programs.) He said capitalism needs oversight and democracy. Which is the sane Democratic reply. As a platform it's rational, adult, and is an electable stance.

Joe asked Buttigieg if he had accepted Jesus, and he was like, "yeah, but being Christian is a lot more than just that." And... shocker... proceeded to thoroughly unfurl a thoughtful and measured and sane description of what it means to be a faithful Christian. Startling. Then Joe asked him if he considered himself a capitalist, thinking that Mayor Pete would tie himself up in rhetorical knots, and he said, "Yes," confusing Joe who didn't expect a straightforward answer.

How angry was our Bond villain that Beto was on the cover of Vanity Fair? She spat the words out of her mouth. Her contempt and envy in that moment was the realest she's ever been on the show. What a delightful woman. Her reading skills are getting worse daily. Finish your coffee every time she misplaces emphasis in a sentence or reads a word incorrectly. You'll be in the hospital by Friday noon.

He said, "People come up to me in the street and tell me I'd be a great mayor." Willie replied, "People come up to me in the street and tell me to get the hell out of the way."

Noah "I'm A Worm" Rothman was particularly odious this morning. So much so I was forced to change the channel from an otherwise great show. It's been said again and again, but the whole production is so much better without Mika especially, and also without Joe. Joe would be better as a special guest. Mika would be better at everything and anything else.

"he found a book that will forever make him more sure of himself at work, home and in life. Wallflower no more!!!" Wow. Mika Brzezinski wrote that about her own book. https://www.amazon.com/Know-Your-Value-Getting-Revised/product-reviews/1602865949

It's her move. "How cute is it that I'm ignorant of low brow culture? Maybe I'll get Joe to show me. That was funny. Funny. It was funny, right?" Mika just said, "She literally is pulling all the chips off the table," as she hyperventilates about Pelosi. Mika doesn't understand words. "Literally" used as a descriptor of a metaphor, "pulling all the chips off..." is profoundly dense and sounds wrong. That segment was just all kinds of unprofessional, banal, and awful. Ugh. Why does Mika think we care what her opinion is of Pelosi? Also, why does Mika gloss over her own calls for impeachment and all the bright new Social Media Socialist's?

Did Chris Christie tell Joe and Mika that they are to blame for giving Trump oxygen and a platform early on? My wife yelled that to me from the other room. If they did, wouldn't that have enraged Joe and cause Mika to sputter? Also, I don't blame Kasie for using the term "socialist" as a label. Bernie is a self-described Socialist. It's why usage of this term is currently an issue. If he's he's too lazy to explicate his meaning to the media... is it Kasie's responsibility?