Devvie
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Posts posted by Devvie
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14 hours ago, endure said:
From what I’ve seen Eric also has drinking problems.
I disagree... 1) if he had issues he'd never be able to hold a job as a pilot (they have random tests all the time and since he has an "on call" type schedule he needs to be sober most of the time). 2) if he had issues he would not have gotten drunk when he was trying to keep up with Virginia. Virginia has the "liver" and tolerance and can metabolize alcohol easily. He gets drunk because he a) has never been a drinker and developed tolerance and b) doesn't have the "liver". The ability to "drink others under the table" (as Ms. V does) is a huge red flag. 3) When Pepper suggested they not drink, Eric had no problem with that. Unfortunately, he wimped out delivering that message to Ms. V.
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3 hours ago, pdlinda said:
It was already revealed that ex-fiance had a "miscarriage." No comment necessary. None provided.
Check the other thread where I posted the article - Chris actually said the baby "made a grand exit". Who says that?
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49 minutes ago, Sycophant4Lease said:
Well, here you go. If it's true, I don't wish it on anyone. But if it was staged. Then................
"I had never been through this before so I didn't know what feelings were normal and what was abnormal, all I know is it felt like a funeral. We were devastated that a baby that made a grand entrance this big in my life now has made a grand exit!" Chris wrote.
Well, it is ALL ABOUT HIM. I think that's a very strange thing to write. . ."Grand Exit"? Who says that about the death of a baby?
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Forgive me if this was posted earlier:
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5 hours ago, qtpye said:
Eric, you hate the way she is with her dog, know she wants to be partying every weekend, and that passing out drunk on couches is a fairly common thing for her. What about this makes you say, "Wow, she will be a great mom and we should have kids immediately"?
2 hours ago, DrewPaul2010 said:I was most disappointed by the "experts" when Pastor Cal did not address Virginia's pregnancy concerns, but even more by the fact that he did not address her drinking issues along with spending the night at the houses of her male friends. Dr. Pepper put it on Eric to address lessening the drinking, but really, I think it's the role of the "professional" counselors/experts.
Exactly. I had a friend who (at 8 yrs old) had to make her mom a Screwdriver every morning. That's the kind of mom V might be. You're so RIGHT. PC should have addressed it! Certainly he knows!
3 hours ago, Ilovepie said:Fuck Chris. The rage I felt listening him of all people saying Paige has an ugly face!!!! I'm getting mad right now typing this. I said it before and I'll say it again - what a garbage human being.
1 hour ago, Ilovepie said:I could not believe he just waltzed in FORTY FIVE MINUTES LATE to his meeting with PC as if all these people are just at his beck and call...
I feel your rage. Rather than give him audience, I wish they would ban him. When they talk to him, it's like they are trying to explain colors to a blind man.
1 hour ago, AnnMarie17 said:Clara runs her mouth...about *every* thing, to *every* body, *every* chance she gets. Whatever is going on with Ryan, be it his sexuality, lack of experience, lack of interest, chronic constipation...whatever the hell it is, he will never tell her because he told her at the jump that he values privacy (I know...I know...dude signed up for a TV show) and she has since then shown that she has zero respect for that value.
I don't think he'll ever tell her what's truly in his head because he knows the town crier will be spilling that tea *every* where!
Brilliant.
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16 hours ago, Adeejay said:
Every time I think that Chris couldn’t possibly do or say something that would make me hate him more, he surprises me. “Of the millions of beautiful, black, white and Latina women in Atlanta, this is what you chose for me?” The nerve of that cro magnon looking mfer. He kept saying he doesn’t like her features. What the heck does that mean?
You forgot some words.. "black Queens, white Queens, Latina Queens". Is it just that Chris fancies himself a King or does Queen denote something else? Well, I googled and it's rather controversial. https://blavity.com/twitter-argues-about-calling-black-women-queens/twitter-argues-about-calling-black-women-queens?category1=black-twitter&category2=culture
The nutshell: "Twitter has been separated into factions over the word queen. Is it a term that's meant to empower, show respect to, and uplift Black women? Or is it a box, controlling the perception of how a woman should or should not behave, holding her to a set of traits and responsibilities that Black men feel are worthy of receiving that title.
Hmmmmmmm... given that it's Chris I'm guessing he's using it in the BOX way! He is the devil.
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AMEN. Finally, experts laying it on the line and addressing problems.
I really hope Erik and V go their separate ways. She is - probably - genetically predisposed to alcoholism. I now remember her dad bringing a flask to her wedding and giving her a long swig. And saying her girlfriends can't keep up with her - her liver processes alcohol TOO WELL. ("Abundant evidence indicates that alcoholism is a complex genetic disease, with variations in a large number of genes affecting risk.") Erik is starting to enable which is sad. Pepper said to say "why can't we stop drinking for a while and see how that increases our communication." He backed off on that and said instead "The biggest thing I've gotten from this whole thing with her [Pepper] is drinking being a problem for us, I guess, in arguments." Virginia says the argument would have been the same. BUT that long pause and visible gulp and "I'm not talking about it" spoke volumes. Then her inability to give him a weekend?! And she started to lose control. I predict, she will now start hiding her drinking. A healthy person would have said "Yeah, let's give that a try". There's a HUGE chance if she stops drinking (cuz I'm not sure she can just cut down) the things Erik likes will disappear. This ain't my first rodeo.
Paige... she just doesn't get it. She giggled when Pepper told her Chris was a narcissist. But I was so glad Pepper didn't mince words and said "he did it to hurt you". But Paige is still wondering "why". People like Paige are frustrating because they don't understand there are bad people in the world. There are people who wake up every day and think "who can I hurt"?
Chris... OMG. Chris thinks he handled things to the best of his ability?... I wish PC had responded "Then your abilities are very limited." It has been interesting to watch a narcissist in action though. People throw the word around too much these days... but Dr. Schwartz is a professional and qualified to really dx him.
Don't think V and B's budget is out of line because they are just - at this point - looking at all their expenses. Sharing housing will cut those down. She is a professional engineer. Might have school loans. And Civil Engineering is very formal - she might have to wear suits. (I worked in a College of Engineering and the national conferences are all suits and ties.) And given it's still primarily men, she has the added burden of commanding respect. I noticed on her "flashback" she had removed the expensive braids. Both of them really try. But I get the kid thing. It is a deal breaker.
Haley and Jake. Let's pull the plug. I actually feel sorry for both of them.
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On 4/5/2021 at 2:16 PM, ladyscorpio said:
I can't believe she was upset that he didn't want her to get plastered with her guy friends an pass out on random guys couches!! What husband would want that??
Exactly. This is the sexism of low expectations for women. If she was the pilot and he was the sloppy drunk partying with women friends and getting upset that she didn't want him sleeping over... people would be outraged and comparing him to Chris. (On a flight a few months ago, I was invited to tour the cockpit. All three officers were women. I'm pretty sure they wouldn't tolerate a drunk, unstable spouse.)
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@qtpye That is a DELICIOUS You Tube! Love her!
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12 hours ago, princelina said:
Maybe it's what he SHOULD do - but he has only know her for a month and I don't think he know what he's gotten into. It seems like he is going out to bars and drinking too much just to hang with her and make her happy - that's not what the spouse of an actual alcoholic does. Not that I'm actually calling her an alcoholic, but she's close enough, and he doesn't really know her, and I'm betting they have fun casual times together that we don't see, plus he's sexually attracted to her and enjoying that aspect of their relationship. IF this show was about making real matches - no one should have been matched with a woman who feels that the most important part of her life is going out and getting her drink on. She should not have been matched with anyone.
100% agree! Exactly. I don't blame him when his frustration boils over to anger or wanting her to leave. He has worked hard - it takes 12 years to become a commercial pilot - college degree, military commissioning, an extremely competitive try for military pilot training, and then a 10 year commitment. (And he could have been deployed at any moment - maybe he was. In 2018, 38 military pilots were killed - 24 in training. I have a friend who went this route and in training he had to scrape a friend up off the runway.) Erik's done some serious shit and has probably seen some serious shit. And then he's paired with unstable Virginia . . . who can't have a normal discussion about her f-ing dog without crying?!? And she's almost proud that she's late to work every day. Women who are successful and responsible don't have the luxury of being late (or hungover). He treats her like a child because she acts like one. Erik wants a traditional life - he wants to skype from some international trip and read the kids a bedtime story. Virginia's goal is to find a comfortable sofa in a friend's house to pass out on.
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38 minutes ago, psychoticstate said:
I was team Eric until last night's episode. Now I understand why Virginia drinks so much -- she's self-soothing. She seems to suffer from some pretty serious anxiety, which should have been a red flag to the "experts." I can't imagine how much marrying a stranger and then moving into a "neutral" apartment with said stranger, and leaving your cats behind, would incite anxiety. I also understand how much Rockie means to her;I just watched the E/V sofa again. Just want to make sure I am fair. Totally, not for E but against V (does that make sense?). Why the F would she think she's ready for marriage? She has "anxiety" issues (which is no doubt exasperated by her alcoholism - I agree she's self medicating), has a bunch of pets, doesn't want to move, doesn't seem to know what marriage even is, etc. A mature woman would think all these things through before signing up to be married! Erik has almost no choice in the way he deals with her. (Disappearing for 40 minutes when she's on a date with her husband...?) She cries and loses it during a calm discussion of her dog. She is a black hole of despair, anxiety, instability, and alcoholism. Erik needs to pull the plug before he's sucked in too far to save himself. Maybe she can be fixed with treatment, medication, AA and therapy. But SHE needs to get herself on that journey. This is beyond his abilities and I think it's very unfair to him. The conversation over the dog SHOULD have been. E - your dog bites. V - Oh, I am so sorry. Where did you go for dog training? E- I went to X. V - OK thanks. That is not a conversation that warrants tears or raised voices. It made me wonder if she had been drinking or needed a drink. (Once someone gets to a certain point they actually NEED to drink and I think she's there.) I did not want to think this . . . I was really hopeful about them. But, she can't handle normal.
Jake has atrocious table manners. He leans on the table (with his whole arm on one side and his elbow on the other), overloads his plate, talks with his mouth full, talks about vomiting, and stabs a large piece of meat and eats it off his fork one bite at a time. He cannot make conversation (that Thai "conversation" was a huge wince). She has to ask him to ask her a question. He's just rude all around. She might be wound a little tight but I would be embarrassed to take him any where. For example, you couldn't take him to a work function or an interview dinner, etc. (For F-sakes, there's a CAMERA filming and documenting you eating like a cave man, Jake!!!)
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Erik is being controlling, yes, but how many people know what's it's like to be around (or live with) an alcoholic? They lie. They are unreasonable. "I get defensive when you act like Tex is perfect (crying)" They are emotional "It always goes back to Rocky! Why?" (crying). They make stupid decisions. (He said she disappeared for 40 minutes. "I was in the bathroom then in the bar." I didn't really understand if she left the house or if she disappeared when they were out.) I think she self medicates and probably has more going on than anxiety. She clearly has problems - big ones. Erik should get on his giant plane and get far from her. Then with Paige and Brianna she's "I want to deal things rationally and talk things out" BUT she's rattling on and on and talking a mile a minute. She sounds unstable. And you could see Paige and Brianna pull back.
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On 3/26/2021 at 9:38 AM, Boo Boo said:
Unpopular opinion: Paige irritates me more than Chris.
No, you are in good company. I think many people are irritated by Paige:
- using her God to justify staying in an abusive relationship. If her God wants her to stay or "gives him to her" in effect she's saying that her God creates abusers thus making them "holy".
- setting a HORRIBLE example to other women (or really anyone in an abusive relationship). For example, that it's her "wifely duty" to have sex with a guy who just said she was unattractive, letting a guy play with her like a cat with a mouse, bringing her to tears with crazymaking behavior, etc.
- reminding all of us of that friend, relative (or even ourselves) who won't listen to reason, makes excuses, is weak, will sit in chaos rather than help themselves. The person who complains endlessly about their job, but won't look for a new one. The person who won't take care of themselves, but is always suffering from something and moaning about it. The adult who still let's their parents drive them crazy. etc. etc.
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16 minutes ago, Crashcourse said:
Not surprising that the hunk o' meat wasn't that great in the sack. That said, however, it wasn't nice of the "friends" to blab that info on national tv.
Well, it's to be expected and Jake and Haley should be more educated on this given their age (IF it really was a sex issue). I read somewhere that back when people were slower to move to intercourse, sex was better for women. All that making out in the back of a car was actually just prolonged foreplay. But here's some science:
"Australian researchers asked 5,118 men and women age 16 to 59 about the four factors mentioned above, and then asked them to describe what had happened during their most recent partner-sex encounter, and if they’d had an orgasm. Overall, 95 percent of men reported orgasms, but only 69 percent of women.
The women’s demographics, beliefs, relationships, and histories of sexual trauma made some difference in their rates of orgasm—but not much. The only demographic factor that really mattered was the level of commitment in the relationship. In a committed relationship, 70 percent of the women reported orgasm. But with casual partners, the rate was just 49 percent."
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/all-about-sex/201602/why-so-many-women-don-t-have-orgasms
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IF it's true that Chris is undecided at DD... that makes total sense: Crazymaking POS. A way to control everyone and punish them. (And what's this "I'm speaking for Paige BS". ) Won't leave her to get on with her life. Won't commit. He's a predator . . . with his purpose to keep a woman off balance, insecure and miserable. He is mean spirited and wants revenge for even the slightest "disrespect". I have a horrible feeling that he will stalk Paige going forward. She should get a divorce (because if she doesn't take advantage of the show providing one - good luck - because he will make it nearly impossible and very costly) and also serve him with a Protection Order. Bam. Bam.
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I think Virginia is starting to realize that Erik is a stable person and she needs that. Yes, they have things to work out (like she needs to cool down or stop the drinking and he needs to stop the controlling and patronizing). She comes from chaos and he comes from stable/traditional. But, if she's smart, she'll rise to the occasion. Rise to stability. I was married for a short time to a stable successful kind of boring guy when I was in my 20s. I left. Then I married a guy who I thought was perfect, handsome, fun/exciting, my soul mate, tons of potential, etc. Guess what? He remained handsome but was lazy, unstable, manic (would make a ton of money then be out of work). It was 25 years of HELL. I look at my friends who stayed with the stable boring guy. They are traveling the world, enjoying retirements, and have a lot to be proud of. If I could kick my own ass, I would.
I agree with many of you that it's Jake AND Haley. Neither are marriage material. It's now pretty obvious. They aren't bad people. They are damaged people. Neither are willing to open up yet neither are willing to take credit for driving the marriage into the ditch. That's a recipe for a really sad life. Haley admits to dismissing men quickly but that's a safe thing to say. She should be saying that she's too afraid of being hurt so she dismisses men. I get it - having a long term boyfriend impregnating someone would be hard to get over. But it's been seven years. They are both so passive aggressive. Both so angry. Both wanting to be victims. And, it seems, within a month they are both perceptive enough to know EXACTLY how to push each other's buttons.
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I want to go Clara Harris on Chris. (She's the woman who took her Mercedes and ran over her cheating husband... not once but around and around.) I think it would be a service to the world. Yet, I don't really feel sorry for Paige tonight. . . she just won't take her hand off the hot stove.
This is the worst season ever. And I have no intention of watching Trainwreck II "The Unmatchables". This is so hard to watch I can't imagine something DESIGNED to be uncomfortable and dramatic would be anything other than a gigantic waste of time... the ultimate cringe fest.
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2 hours ago, sara416 said:
There's the use of disrespectful that I've been waiting for! Chris said it a bunch in a FB post about the incident too that I saw on the MAFSfan Instagram story shortly after it aired. That whole family really likes the use of that word.
Well, the mom wrote distasteful but potato/pa-tah-toe. In either event, how is a pastor doing his job, disrespectful or distasteful? Clergy don't have to call and get permission from a spouse to meet with the other spouse. If Chris doesn't like his dirty laundry being aired, he shouldn't have gone on television. But, excellent point, this mother has raised a real narcissistic liar. If Chris was my son, I wouldn't be using the hyphen - I'd pretend I had no idea who he was and just be Mrs. Ray!
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https://soapdirt.com/married-at-first-sight-chris-williams-mocks-fan-theories/
I know a lot of people in finance and typically they are beyond reproach in the way they live their lives. The last thing they would want is for people to know they LIE. Or are reckless with money. If I ever saw Chris behind the desk of my bank, financial firm, etc. I would close my account that day! All I see is that he is a financial manager. That could be a lot of things. Anyone have an idea? I know he "defaulted" on the Subway franchise.
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I'm not sure Pastor Dwight would be any better than Pastor Cal. Someone like Paige needs a more coach-father/mother-clergy person. Someone who really lays it out for her clearly: "When Chris says he's not attracted to you then tells you he wants sex, that's abuse. The proper reaction is to leave immediately not think it's your wifely duty." Maybe the answer is to have more than one "pastor" figure - like the joke: A Priest, a Rabbi and a Preacher... maybe a woman who's ordained?
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21 hours ago, Yeah No said:
Haley admitted that she has tried but just can't connect with this guy. He gives her smirky, dismissive one word answers to things that should be conversation starters. She feels cut off at the pass at every turn with him. Every time things seem to be going in the right direction he throws more pressure on her about her attraction to him. Just STOP IT already, you're only sabotaging yourself. He is acting like a 14 year old, not a guy pushing 40. He has no clue how to handle a woman.
Brilliant. He just can't stop himself. I think it's more than women - I'm guessing people at work find him difficult or odd. One of those guys whose desk is covered with their Pez collection or simply bare. . . and brings fun work conversations to a screeching halt. I want to go back and watch what his friends say pre-wedding about him.
There is NO way Chris bought a "Benz". He lost his Subway because he never made payments. I imagine that huge credit ding would make him not qualify for financing. And, I doubt he has the $33K in cash for the "starter" Mercedes. I also looked and Georgia is not a community property state so Paige isn't on the hook if it were true. Those two and their Bible study. Eye Roll. I'm thinking Chris hollowed out his bible to keep condoms in it... oh, wait., he doesn't wear condoms. Paige? What happened to you? Who told you all these platitudes about "wifely duty" and "not new to it, I'm true to it"??? Who told you, you didn't deserve a good man? Paige needs to go live somewhere else for a while and quit on everyone who got her to this sad place.
Clara and Ryan. Maybe if she'd not given him her entire sexual history he'd have consummated things. I'm old but before I was married I waited about 3 months before having sex with a guy. And, I would NEVER do a "tell all"! And I don't want to hear his either! Clara said early on that she didn't like being forced to go to church - she acts like she's still rebelling and I think this troubles Ryan. Having a healthy attitude about sex doesn't mean blabbing about it. Clara keep some secrets.
Virginia and Erik... I know lots of people who are happy together and have differing opinions. In one case a prosecutor is married to a defense attorney - they agree to disagree. Also, people change their opinions as life gives them life. Having kids, buying a house, traveling, job failures or successes, family illness and deaths - all of that impacts your politics and religious beliefs. But I do think that Erik - as the older of the two - should realize some of these things at this point in life and not simply shut his mind. (Especially surprising because he does travel the world and usually that is a very mind opening experience.)
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They really should air this season during Christmas... It's the Island of Misfit Toys. A train with square wheels, the rejected doll, the bird that swims, etc. etc.
"The residents of the Island of Misfit Toys are a group of characters from the Rankin/Bass television special Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. They are sentient toys who all have some strange quirk about them. Because of said quirks, these toys feel that there is no human child who could possibly want to play with them."
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I've been done with Dr. Phil for a long time. There have been so many shows where people had real problems and left with no real help. He's actually doing a disservice to people. However, I digress... I came on here to ask a question:
The one show that still haunts me is A Husband Obsessed; A Wife Accused. This was a two part episode. It aired November 8, 2013. Does anyone know what happened to that poor woman? Did her husband receive help? There was never any follow up (of which I am aware). I lost all respect for Dr. Phil that he didn't help her more. I would have moved that woman into my house if I could have . . .
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On 3/12/2021 at 12:13 AM, antfitz said:
I think Chris is despicable. IDK why he went on this show. But I don't think it's to find love. And I don't think he's afraid of love otherwise he wouldn't say he loves his ex. He's just jerking Paige around....I think for sex. She needs to dump his ugly ass. Now Chris no longer wants to talk to the pastor. Every criticism is that's not what a "man" does. Well Chris, a MAN does not lead a woman on, or marry for some weird reason....especially when he's been sleeping with someone else recently enough to get them preggers 6 wks ago!
Producers STOP telling Paige to go back and talk! It's nean.
Chris is a woman hater. I knew it the minute I heard him say he wanted someone "submissive". He wants a compound of women to torment.
S12.E13: Unanswered Questions
in Married At First Sight
Yeah, I don't get it. It's like they drew names out of a hat! Season One was so well done - only three couples and it appeared that they (experts) spent a lot of time making the matches. I know Kourtney and Jason eventfully divorced but I was pretty astonished when they first talked and he discovered her dad and brother were firefighters and so was he. It was interesting and engaging. This season is horrible. I feel like a bad person for even watching. So, unless they do some sort of "make it right" summation show (where they say how they are going to do a better job and how) - I'm done.