Devvie
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Posts posted by Devvie
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On 4/28/2021 at 2:45 PM, qtpye said:
Interestingly, enough this same person said that Paige reminded them of the little girl mentality and Chris's ex, Mercedes, seemed to have the confidence of a grown woman in the little screen time that we saw her.
Well, a grown woman with extremely poor judgment . . . "let's go on television and tell the world I got knocked up at my father's funeral by a complete a-hole". Most women would be keeping that info to themselves until the day they died. How many people here would be proud of having sex with Chris and admitting it on national television?!?!?!
(Was it a grandfather's funeral? Tomato, To-maat-toe...)
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And that's a wrap. Things pretty much turned out the way I figured. And that's unfortunate in a couple of cases: V&E and C&P (it would have been wonderful if Paige had issued a statement and not met with him).
BTW you need to find the article where Chris states the baby "made a dramatic exit". Who says that about a miscarriage - regardless if there was a real pregnancy or not?
Chris was NOT crying. He makes the sounds and puts his head down because there are no tears. And then she chases after him. Message to Paige: I guarantee you that everyday you decide to not see him or talk to him or take a text... you will grow stronger and more confident. And that soon no one will be able to manipulate you ever again.
So I just deleted MAFS from my DVR. This season was the worst and the way the "experts" allowed Chris to manipulate and abuse a woman is unforgivable in 2021. I will not be manipulated to watch this anymore. I feel it would be hypocritical and a disservice to women to tell advertisers that I support this. Yes, I sound very dramatic but to not take the opportunity to educate is negligence on the part of the producers.
But, this forum has been a blast!!!!! Loved, loved, loved reading everyone's contributions.
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13 hours ago, me5671 said:
And Pastor Cal should STFU with his equivocating bullshit. "They've both pulled each other back and forth so many times..." No, dude. That's not what happened at all. It was more like Chris pushing her away and then pulling her back in at will. Like he was playing with a yo-yo.
AMEN. That's exactly what I was thinking.... "How DARE you imply, let alone state, that she "pulled" him. That is a LIE... shame on you "Pastor" Cal. If I remember correctly, LYING is the 9th commandment and perhaps, you should go back to remedial Christianity class!
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Just waiting to remove this show from my DVR line-up! This season was a deal breaker. I did like some of THIS episode though... love these couples. They make me smile: smart, honest, mature people whose opinions I value.
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On 5/3/2021 at 10:57 AM, Nancybeth said:
One of the Erik/Virginia issues from the beginning, to me, is Erik's tendency to be paternalistic to Virginia. It's weird and gross. I don't think he sees her as an equal. And Virginia tends to come off like a whiny little girl in trying to stand up for herself.
Yes, I don't think he sees her as an equal. I don't either. She is reckless with her life while Erik has been very planful. I'd be totally on her side up if she stood up to Erik as a strong, intelligent, sober, mature woman. But she doesn't because she isn't. (You get a pass on two or three episodes of passing out on someone's sofa in life and you turn in the card at ~24. I don't see her standing up for herself, but fighting for her immature lifestyle. She's almost proud of not progressing in life.) Erik wants a partner not a rebellious teenager. I doubt he would patronize any of the women I know. . .
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On 5/2/2021 at 10:12 PM, qtpye said:
Speaking of wedding day first impressions....can anyone tell me why the Hell relatively decent looking men like Jake and Ryan would go to their wedding day with the ugliest haircuts possible?
Because there isn't time to grow their hair. I think they only have two weeks between finding out they are chosen and the wedding. Since they both have part of their head shaved - it would be impossible to grow out in time. I agree on their hair! Jake looks like he's got that military thing going on and Ryan... well, it's just odd. That said, even with time, they might think their hair is hot stuff!
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@KateHearts If you look a couple weeks back you will see some pictures someone posted of "Erik and his first wife". The guy doesn't look like Erik to me, but some people think it's him and that he must have had plastic surgery. You might want to take a look and judge for yourself.
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8 hours ago, princelina said:12 hours ago, Empress1 said:
I don't even think it would be that hard for a divorced man to date after 40, especially one who is fit and has a good job. I've seen much worse-looking men Jake's age and older on the apps. If he wants kids his wife gives birth to, he might have to marry someone younger, but lots of men do that. And I agree - basically anything would be better than being married to someone who clearly does not like you. What's the point? Just so you can say you're married? Not worth it, IMO.
I think it will make him look better - people are suspicious of the never-married! It will give him an "in" with the divorced-lady crowd 😄
As an older woman ... let me tell you that dating definitely favors guys as people age. So much so, that I don't get why Jake keeps mentioning it!
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9 hours ago, Airy2021 said:
Erik reeks of a mixture of white privilege and wealth but also incredible insecurity.
I agree about the insecurity in this relationship... sorta. But, those with privilege don't serve in the military. You might not remember (not sure of your age) but that was one of the biggest arguments for keeping the draft (a way to equitably feed the US military). And, yes, it appears his family is successful but not wealthy - wealthy people own jets not single engine planes IMO.
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This season was so difficult to watch that I am done. I will finish this season to decision day but then, on MY decision day, I will never watch again. What they should do:
1) Not give Chris even one more second of air time. They should delete his image etc.
2) One of the "experts" should explain to people why his behavior was abusive and as a public service use those scenes to tell people to get out of abusive situations and how.
3) Find a nice walk on part for Paige on some show giving her hair, makeup and beautiful clothes for it.
4) Get Paige therapy for the hurtful things that were said to her.
If they do not do #1 and #2... I might write to some of the advertisers. I think it's appalling that in 2021 they wouldn't address the issue. It's a REALITY show not some soap opera. It's irresponsible. That whole "submissive and a freak", "it's my wife" shit is so offensive to women.
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14 hours ago, LennieBriscoe said:
Erik, Erik, Erik. His needs and neediness are so much that he cannot see that Virginia is not right for him.
Ironically, Erik will feel profoundly alone if they remain married.
Amen. He is willfully naive about Virginia and her problems. But some people have to learn the hard way. That's where Erik's beliefs about himself are going to kick him in the ass. I like Erik a lot but he is a know-it-all and he thinks V only needs to make a few changes . . . he will have to confront soon the fact that he can be wrong sometimes.
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4 hours ago, JocelynCavanaugh said:
But it’s to the point where I worry that she might need a restraining order, except I don’t know of any jurisdiction that will issue one against “the general public” or “internet mean girls.”
Well, except all these people 1) signed up; 2) are getting paid; and 3) know that cameras are rolling. Restraining orders are not for people who are volunteering for abuse - but I get your point. (I think some of these folks are going to regret doing this show for the rest of their lives. Especially in the career arena.) The world is very different now - fortunately or unfortunately - a false move or word can ruin your life. If a person can't trust themselves to be careful in word and deed, they shouldn't sign up to have a camera follow them around (or even be on any type of social media).
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4 hours ago, LennieBriscoe said:
I think that Haley simply regrets being intimate with a man she otherwise loathes---especially if she found the experience pleasurable.
I think most men would find sex with a snowman or a block of ice more pleasurable than sex with Haley. . .
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Agree with so many people here.
Erik - get thee to an Al-Anon meeting! Unfortunately, not my first rodeo with a drunk. I think the cats are a straw-man for V. She will do anything to find a way to get out of this so she can drink. She keeps being more and more unreasonable because she doesn't want the divorce to be because of her alcoholism. She knows. She knows. She knows she's a drunk.
The one thing I thought was funny... Haley buddying up to Virginia! The hugs! It was so revealing. Haley wouldn't speak to a trashy lush like Virginia (with her shell choker and bad skin) outside of this show. But she needs someone to be on her side! And vice versa. "I won't judge you, if you won't judge me". Interesting. They. Are. Enabling. Each. Other.
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On 4/22/2021 at 7:46 AM, Silver Bells said:
She is not a loving woman
You nailed it in 6 words.
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On 4/21/2021 at 5:57 PM, LennieBriscoe said:
Virginia's complexion on the beach looks a wee methy.
You know, I've been thinking that too... and I felt bad for thinking it. But, it does. And her jittering around and talking a mile a minute. Drunks don't do that jittering thing unless withdrawing.
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1 hour ago, LennieBriscoe said:
And what kind of wife did you bring to Jacob, Haley?
An aloof, humorless, insulting, self-centered, thin-lipped Mean Girl.
It just occurred to me that Haley has pretty much screwed herself. Every subsequent guy she meets is going to watch these episodes of her being "an aloof, humorless, insulting, self-centered, thin-lipped Mean Girl". She doesn't bring much to the table that overshadows her personality. Jake would drive me nuts, but there will be women lining up for a shot with him following this show. It's not fair, but it's a reality.
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1 hour ago, Kdawg82 said:
I ALWAYS say the same in relationships- be careful what you look for because it may be ALL that you get.
Brilliant!!! Did you make that up? If so you need to trademark it and put it on a t-shirt! Or a pillow. I'd buy one for all my friends.
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2 hours ago, psychoticstate said:
From her own words, she seems to have been very, very hurt by the relationship that ended when she was 20 or 21. I don't think she's gotten over it or through it and it's negatively impacting her and her dating life now.
Perhaps this guy was the first person in Haley's life who didn't put her on a pedestal. The guy was a jerk for not breaking up with her BEFORE he started up with someone else (maybe he did and her ego didn't accept it. I'd pay a lot of money to hear his side!). But, omg, she's screwing up the best years of her life by not getting over it. (I was engaged during college, the guy cheated on me, I gave the ring back and consider myself very lucky - and smart - I didn't marry a cheating loser.) She's wallowing in self-pity and taking it out on every guy. Haley - most everyone is rejected at one point or another. Who cares? Why do you think you are so special that you don't have to deal with life-crap? Get some therapy or go to the batting cages every day and get over it. You are squandering time and will end up an old, smoldering angry, lonely person.
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On 4/15/2021 at 9:17 PM, princelina said:
So Erik's a jerk but what he's looking for isn't all that uncommon in the realm of marriage seekers - and as far as Rule #1 goes - he's probably only asking at this point that she doesn't pass out on "guy friends" couches
Excellent point. Give the regular prosecutions of men who rape drunk or drugged women . . . 1) why would any loving partner want a woman to put herself at risk? 2) why would she put herself at risk? Yes, I know they are her friends. . . but I can name several cases off the top of my head where some random person (or persons) led a woman off somewhere, walked through an unlocked door, etc. etc. Shit happens.
Looked up what lip curling in means...from an article in Psychology Today The Lips don't Lie "the level of lip compression or disappearing lips varied with the level of stress caused by the topic". I was so team Haley... but was wrong.
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Haley thinks she's a sophisticated, worldly, "knows how to act, dress, etc." person. But, in reality, she does not possess good manners. Demonstrating genuine appreciation of a gift is Etiquette 101.
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26 minutes ago, Silver Bells said:
It's more socially acceptable to be divorced than to never have been married; I think that's fucked up.
Brilliant.
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CORRECTION: I did not realize the woman talking with V was her SIL! Whoever said Virginia looks like she stepped out of a swamp . . . BRILLIANT. The difference in these two women is like a Before and After! V says "I'm such a trust person" Now most people would end here with "I trust people until they give me a reason not to" Not Ms. V! She ends with "so, like, you have to trust ME". Here's the intro on her from the Lifetime website (my emphasis):
Virginia (26) hasn’t had the best relationships in the past, but she’s much stronger as a person and has learned from each failed partnership. She’s at a point in her life where she can confidently say she is prepared for marriage. Admitting that she has a history of self-sabotaging relationships, Virginia is ready to overcome her fears and commit to love.
Here's what it should say: Virginia (26) wants what she wants when she wants it.
Haley. Way to make yourself look even worse. And, yep, "that Mother". If my kid (who is 26) did something so hurtful I would not enable them because I am his mom not his friend. Haley cannot simultaneously say she's trying to communicate with Jake and then not empathize. Not that Jake is without flaws - cuz he would drive me crazy.
Note to Pastor Cal: Me thinks thou doth protest too much.
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58 minutes ago, MyTwoCents said:
Virginia is such an idiot! Yeah, the military is just like Boy Scouts 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄 That has to be the stupidest thing she’s ever said, and that’s saying a lot!!
What an ignorant and insulting thing to say. Those are not badges for learning how to tie a knot! Erik shows way more interest in her high school sports than she did about his flying combat missions. I loved that she said "I had to learn to be an adult very quickly" when she is the most immature woman on the show! The first segment she cries because Erik isn't calling her family. In the second segment she talks about how dysfunctional her family was and that she didn't speak to her dad for a long time. Even her friend thinks she's an idiot. I think her sober, pretty, put together friend should steal him.
Haley. Haley. Haley. He's right. She hurt him. He finally opens up and she gets defensive. Wow. That was hard to watch but major points to Jake. Shame on you, Haley.
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I Can See For Miles: The Kids Are Alright In The Media
in The Kids Are Alright
What a huge mistake to cancel this show! I miss it. Thankfully, I bought the first season. Each episode is a little brilliant gem. The actors were amazingly talented which is saying a lot since most were very young. So sad and I'd love to know the reasoning behind the decision.