lmerlyn

Oh forgot to say, remember when Andre Leon Talley was on the show? Can anyone on the planet explain why an honest to god ICON like him would come within a thousand miles of this train wreck?

So many thoughts...but mostly, WHY do I allow even a nanometer of my brain space to be dedicated to generating thoughts about this show? It's seriously some kind of magic crystal ball that sucks you in and you can't look away. It's the reality TV version of the Sirens or Medusa or something. I would love to be able to say that I'm only watching for Nyle, but who am I kidding? There hasn't been a Nyle for the last 21 cycles (just noticed that's YET ANOTHER made up Tyra-ism...wth other show has "cycles" instead of seasons? I need to put my brain on the double rinse cycle). Anyway, my useless thoughts, in no particular order: Um, Yu, if someone doesn't know the word "fashionista," it's a good bet they won't know the word "pinnacle." "There are 3 things I need you to focus on when you are being a doll that has come to life." God I love how Tyra teaches totally made-up shit as if it were an actual, real-life skill requiring set tasks/steps to be executed, like changing a tire or making an origami crane. Like, oh, thank god, I can't tell you the number of times I have been in a sitch that required me to simulate a doll that has come to life and I've just been AT A LOSS! Thanks, Ty Ty Baby! As someone wisely pointed out above, the show might have a smidgen of cred if she actually taught them things that would help them to succeed in the industry, as opposed to the same made-up-name posing "tips" she's "taught" for 22 loads of laundry I mean cycles. Um, pretty sure people who try out for this shitfest know what "tooching" is by now. Mame is kind of a bitch but she is gorgeous and a good model, and to critique her doll photo as looking like a babysitter was unfair bc while it was true-ish, it was totally down to the styling. They have a history of styling the models hideously and then blaming them for bad modeling. Bello's panel outfit made him look like the fortune telling machine doll from "Big." Joan Collins wore that turban better, Bello. People seemed to like Justin's shorts, but I thought they looked like my husband's Champion boxer briefs and hence looked like he just forgot his pants. He is cute and likable though. Mikey's hair at panel = one of the Brady girls. I'm starting to feel sorry enough for Courtney to feel like a mean girl for commenting on her, but I will say that I feel like she grew up in one of those white separatist cults like Ruby Ridge or something. Ugh, Hadassah WOULD have dolls. If Devin's makeup job on Courtney wasn't sabotage in action, I don't know what is. Challenge question: would you rather take a five hour road trip alone in a car with Devin, or let him do your makeup? Has anyone scoured the web for proof of Devin's alleged modeling career?? I'm on it. The producers not screening out Courtney in the psych eval reminds me of something that would happen in the (kickass) show "UNREAL." I'm genuinely curious to know how Courtney became so interested in posing for selfies, which she is legit decent at, and in pursuing a modeling career with seemingly no knowledge of nor interest in fashion. Sorry, this is waaaay too long. Last thing, I really am sorry, Courtney, I think you seem basically decent and you really owe it to yourself to work on your self esteem bc you have something. You have to be your own biggest fan or nobody else will be a fan at all. And be careful with boys please - what you had with Skanky I mean Mikey was borderline emotionally abusive. Actually scarp that borderline.

To those wondering when/if we were ever actually told that Devin is straight, I can't remember if we were, but anyone remember his pre-makeover Bozo the Clown-meets-Richard Simmons hair? Well, you can knock me over with a feather if you can show me one self-respecting gay man who would leave the house with that horrific hair....other than Richard Simmons, of course. So perhaps not a confirmation of heterosexuality, but anecdotal evidence thereof? Or he could be asexual - after all, think how often he's told to either fuck right off or go fuck himself! Speaking of anecdotal - Thinking of Richard Simmons reminds me of an amusing personal anecdote: my father was once told off by the concierge at a Ritz Carlton for wearing shorts in their lobby, and RICHARD FREAKING SIMMONS came to his aid (he apparently had special shorts-wearing permission due to his vaunted status as AN AMERICAN ICON!!!!, but still stuck up for his fellow shorts-wearer, which was pretty cool of him). OF COURSE Richard Simmons would be a staunch shorts advocate. Does he even own trousers? Or just those very thick nude hose that are only worn by him, ice skaters, and Hooters waitresses? And now I just remembered Deal-a-Meal!

"Mikey accidentally winds up sleeping with Bello, and that they are kicked off because they cannot get their hair untangled." Ok NorthstarATL, you have officially slain me with that one. I live in Atlanta too and you have just shot instantly to local celeb status in my eyes. So glad I found this forum - there are some seriously funny people on here!

"but he looks too much like Stacey Dash and that makes me hate him." Oh my god, if anyone still said "ROTFL," I would be saying it to this!