That's a Shame: Jerry Seinfeld

[Lily Adler]

Not a great actor, but I love the scene where he expresses emotions to Lori Loughlin.

[Portia]

That's a great moment. Another of my favorites, perhaps similar to that, is in the Kenny Rogers Roasters episode when Jerry and Kramer swap apartments...and personalities. He does some nice work, as does Michael Richards.

[Bastet]

"Oh, I'm stressed," complete with Krameresque hand gesture.  That's gold, Jerry.  Gold.

[Soopertater]

Jerry seemed to have the most complete genealogy of any character.  Father:  Morty.  Mother:  Helen, her brother Uncle Leo, his grandson (Jerry's cousin) Jeffrey,  Helen's mom Nana.  He mentioned in one episode he had a sister, but that never went anywhere.  Also, he had a grandmother?? Manya from The Pony Remark, but I'm not sure of her place in the family.

[photo fox]

I think Manya was some kind of cousin. He hadn't met her before.

 

Jerry had a sister? I can't believe I've never caught that!

[Soopertater]

It was in The Chinese Restaurant.  Just a throwaway line they never ran with.  But when the whole episode is nothing but talking...and...waiting... ;-)

 

Both directors Tom Cherones and Andy Ackerman mentioned in the DVD extras that Jerry did not start out as a good actor, principally because he didn't need to be one--he was playing himself.  Tom said he had to differentiate between "TV Jerry" and "Real Jerry," which was negligible.  Andy thought they first time he really had to do another character was The Chicken Roaster, when he had to play Kramer.  The door slide wasn't as good, but the character was pretty darn close.  In a strange role-reversal, both George and Kramer did brief sendups of Jerry's real-life comedy persona (intentionally poorly).  They both hit on the "What's the deal with _____?" line, which bugged the crap out of Real Jerry.

[ParadoxLost]

I don't think this is worth creating a games thread [mod can disagree]; but I always wanted to know if I was the only person bothered by this.  And really, I was bothered every week for years both during Jerry's in-show stand up and at the end of 60 Minutes.  Is Jerry Seinfeld destined to become Andy Rooney (60 Mintues)?  And who stole whose shtick?  So I devised this little test, who is the quote attributed to, Seinfeld or Rooney?

 

"The federal government sponsored research that has produced a tomato that is perfect in every respect, except that you can't eat it. "

AR

 

"Have you ever noticed how they keep improving your laundry detergent, but they still can't get those blue flakes out? Why do we trust them to get our clothes clean? These guys can't even get the detergent white!?"

JS

 

"Have you ever noticed that the waiter who takes your order is not the one who brings your food anymore? What is that about? And which waiter are you tipping, anyway? I think that next time I go to a restaurant I'll just say, "Oh, sorry, I only eat the food. The guy who pays the bill will be along shortly."

JS

 

”The store clerk who asks, ‘May I help you with something?’ can hardly ever help.”

AR

 

"For all those men who say, “Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free,” here’s an update for you. Now 80 percent of women are against marriage, why? Because women realize it’s not worth buying an entire pig, just to get a little sausage.”

AR

 

"Men want the same thing from their underwear that they want from women: a little bit of support, and a little bit of freedom."

JS

 

"“Did you ever hear one of those corny, positive messages on someone's answering machine? 'Hi, it's a great day and I'm out enjoying it right now. I hope you are too. The thought for the day is share the love. Beep.' 'Uh, yeah, this is the VD clinic… speaking of being positive, your test is back. Stop sharing the love.”

AR

 

"There’s very little advice in men’s magazines, because men don’t think there’s a lot they don’t know. Women do. Women want to learn. Men think, “I know what I’m doing, just show me somebody naked."

JS

 

"Isn't it weird that we drink milk, stuff designed to nourish baby cows? How did that happen? Did some cattleman once say, "Oh, man, I can't wait 'til them calves are done so I can get me a hit of that stuff."

JS

 

"What's with the people who put carpeting on the lid of their toilet seat? What are they thinking -- "Gosh, if we have a party there may not be enough standing room; I'd better carpet the toilet too."

JS

 

""Men wake up aroused in the morning. We can't help it. We just wake up and we want you. And the women are thinking, "How can he want me the way I look in the morning?" It's because we can't see you. We have no blood anywhere near our optic nerve.”

AR

 

}How come you have to pay someone to rotate your tires? Isn't that the basic idea behind the wheel? Don't they rotate on their own?"

JS

 

"Did you ever notice, when you are sitting at a red light, that when the person in front of you pulls up a couple of inches, you are compelled to move up too? Do we really think we are making progress toward our destination?"

JS

 

 

 

 

 

[RedZoneTuba]

One trait of Jerry's character that I haven't seen mentioned in other discussions: he caves in way too easily to coercion, even when he is clearly in the right. Examples...

• His old (incredibly obnoxious) "friend" from the old neighborhood who started sobbing when Jerry "broke up" with him, so Jerry caved and strung out their relationship.
• All the people in his building shun him when he politely and reasonably explains he won't be doing the "kiss hello" anymore.  He caves to this peer pressure and backtracks on his position.
• Banya insisting that Jerry didn't buy him dinner yet for the Armani suit, even though they went to Mendy's and Jerry bought him lunch at the coffeeshop.  Jerry caved again.

In all these cases (and others I can't think of right now I'm sure) I've thought "C'mon, you're in the right, Jerry.  Get a spine for chrissakes!"

[Bastet]

Maybe it's part of his "I'm Even Steven" philosophy, in which he doesn't expend much energy getting his way when he's right, because there will be a corresponding time when gets his way in spite of being wrong.