MamaMax
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Posts posted by MamaMax
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19 minutes ago, ariel said:
I think Jill & Derick are proof that the Duggar's style of courtship has many, many flaws. I hope this style of courtship doesn't hurt Jinger too.
I was going to say the same thing...that I think BOTH Jill and Derrick are victims of the cult of purity thing that so many fundies subscribe to. I am sure they both had good intentions. I believe that Derrick thought Jill would like to "be on the mission field" because she SAID she would. I am sure she THOUGHT she would. But this is a young woman who has never been anywhere, met anyone or done anything alone, out of her bubble, without "likeminded" people to make her feel normal.
Her parents convinced her that her FATHER would make sure she picked a good husband, and she believed them. If they had any kind of normal dating life they may have discovered that they weren't a good match. If she ever took a trip, or lived away from home, she might have discovered, "I'm really more of a homebody." But her VIRGINITY was her parents number 1 concern, the MOST important thing about her, and they would not ever risk even the tiniest chance she might give up her "purity," so they watched her like a hawk, made sure her future husband never got to spend a minute alone with her, and sold BOTH of these kids a bill of goods that married life, sex and babies would be all great because they were "Godly" and "saved themselves for marriage."
I have directed people to it before, but if you've never seen it, it's so worth the read:
http://fiddlrts.blogspot.com/2014/05/modesty-culture-part-1-introduction.html
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4 hours ago, Winston9-DT3 said:
Yeah, her size being part of his pitch is my own interpretation mostly. But I do feel like he's pushing the "I REALLY like you, as in, for REAL" stuff so hard you have to wonder why he expects her to think he's not that into her, if not due to her weight?
I imagine Toby's insistence is the writers' way of telling us in as few words/scenes as possible that Kate has low self-esteem and doesn't think she deserves 'it all', due to her weight. But the actress isn't playing Kate as a wallflower. She comes off self-assured, poised and competent. Sure, she doesn't like her weight but that's true of virtually all women I know.
His horny approach is getting on my nerves as well. Perhaps lazy writing? Trying to get across that he's hot for her, not going to friend-zone her.
There's an element of the "fat girls aren't sexy" myth that they are trying to dispel, but it's not working for me. It's too clunky. The actors don't seem to have chemistry to me. It would be better if you could just TELL he was super attracted to her, and not just horny and wanting to get laid.
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On 9/16/2016 at 4:33 PM, loloandco said:
It's a good thing no drinking games involve taking even a tiny sip upon hearing "yall," "all of yall" or "yall's." (looking at you, Joy)
We had to go to "all y'all," so as not to pass out too early.
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I seriously thought Jinge was going to have her knees buckle when she saw the HUGE bed Babe has.
Also, I have never been more uncomfortable watching people on TV as I was with those 2 on the couch with the parents rightthere. Holy God, it was awful. I don't know how the camera people did uit.
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On 8/30/2016 at 3:58 PM, Marigold said:
I think Jessa is uncomfortable with everyone that is not Gothard. That's a lot of people!
And that's exactly what her parents wanted.
On 9/7/2016 at 7:00 PM, GeeGolly said:I agree in that I too, would have thought Jill would have out-shined Jessa in motherhood. I feel that Jill is bored, overwhelmed and lonely. I think Jessa has a lot of help including her family as well as Ben changing all the diapers ... and I believe Jessa does a lot of her parenting with the show and social media in mind. If the cameras and fans were gone, IMHO, Jessa would be a very, very, very different mother.
On 9/7/2016 at 7:26 PM, Scarlett45 said:Do you think Jill might be suffering from depression (either post partum or otherwise) that might effect how she interacts with Izzy? Living in Central America, away from her family, even if it's what her headship wants might not be the best thing for her emotionally.
She knows how to care for Izzy physically, but emotionally she has changed.
I absolutely think she has PPD, beginning with a traumatic birth experience, and moving far away from home into a totally different culture, where you don't speak the language... I actually feel bad for her. Also, I think that's why she's not pregnant again. I'll bet there's not a whole lot of sextyimes if she's feeling overwhelmed and depressed.
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On 6/1/2016 at 0:34 PM, Kerrey92 said:
I had an issue with "deranged Kevin" and the way Marco was acting. The writing seemed thin on this part to me. I can where Kevin could be pushed over the edge to take Marco down, out of frustration, fear, and pent up tension from the past months of covering up Danny's murder. But to me, the scene didn't lend itself to Kevin taking that step and it seemed a little out of left field.
Well, the fact that O'Bannon called WHILE Kevin was right there and Marco was about to walk out the door that very minute to meet him really turned up the heat for Kevin. He had absolutely no time whatsoever to consider what to do. He absolutely acted in the heat of the moment.
And on a shallower note, does it bug anyone else that Diana's accent is all over the place? I hear her Aussie accent all the time. I wish they made her character Australian and just let her talk normally. And the absolute WORST for me is whenever she says "Danny" because it sounds exactly like Olivia Newton John in Grease. LOL
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On 8/3/2016 at 9:48 AM, Vaysh said:
The homebirth obsession is a bit of a mystery. Michelle did have a few of them before her body stopped cooperating and seemed to prefer them to her hospital ones so maybe she yapped on about how woooonderful homebirth is where you won't have to interact with those evil, sinful doctors with their science and their university educations. Add Jill's "midwife"-training under rabid homebirth advocates with no common sense, Anna's multiple successful ones and you've got the perfect storm. I suppose in their minds a homebirth is always the best option and hospitals are the absolute last resort (see Jill's mulish refusal to go until she had no choice). Jessa's lack of proper pre-natal care fits in with this mindset too, I think. They don't need no stinkin' science, they're the Duggars and God is on their side.
Overall there seem to be a lot of strange and fearbased notions about hospital births among the fundie homebirthers and a lot of the misconceptions are spread by the "midwives".
As I see it, the major point of all the "rules" are to keep the younger generations (notably, the generation that didn't CHOOSE this life, but were born into it) away from any non-Quiverfull influences.
No teachers, coworkers, school friends, teamates, etc, to provide a glimpse of what life might be like outside the cult. No doctors, nurses or hospitals is the next logical step. A doctor might mention contraception to a 25-year old with 4 kids, who is feeling tired and discoraged. A nurse might mention that no one would ever need to know that you tracked your cycle to space out the babies. A hospital might send in a counsellor to talk to a woman with post-partum depression.
They can not have that. To keep the cult alive, they have to keep the girls and young women brainwashed long enough to get them good and saddled down with a slew of kids. Then they can't leave. And will KEEP themselves brainwashed in order to believe that their lives are not miserable. (MeChelle??)
On 8/3/2016 at 3:21 PM, Lady Edith said:This is an interesting article I found on the quiver full group and home births.
That is some CRAZY shit. I think the cult leaders love the crazy people who come up with really elaborate defenses of the stuff they do to keep the cult members in line...UNTIL the crazy people cause someone to die. Then they go "Oh, no, we never said that...(crazy lady) did!"
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So how do we know about Sierra's earlier life? She wasn't raised by these like-minded lunatics?
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2 hours ago, Sew Sumi said:
It is. I don't want to go into much detail because it's the wrong thread, but yeah, early in her marriage, her husband demanded she find "a ministry," and that's what she came up with.
I am actually quite interested in her backstory...where can we take the conversation? Maybe Fellowship thread?
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6 hours ago, tabloidlover said:
I wonder if Sierra claims it as "charity" and uses it as a tax deduction.
Don't know if its true, but someone else said that it's her "ministry."
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3 hours ago, Churchhoney said:
Oh, I'd take my car to him in a minute! ha .
Thanks. I'd forgotten whether the mechanic was Jason or Justin. But I was including Joe among the potential employees -- since didn't he go to Crown to "study" something to do with his passion for "ministering to young men"? And as I write this thinking of Jer's masturbation sermon -- not to mention the recent Joe and the Twins photo -- it becomes funnier and more annoying at the same time....And maybe that shopping mall anti-sex lecture for suburban boys isn't so far fetched, after all. .... Maybe they could rent an auto bay in the evenings for their preaching cum car fixing.
Ahem.
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19 hours ago, toodles said:
Because they wouldn't be able to roll it in to the mortgage. No way could they pay for it any other way
Oooooooohhhhhhhh.
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On 7/9/2016 at 1:18 PM, DakotaJustice said:
All I think about when I see those floor plans is all the cleaning involved.
I think of all the empty space that must be cooled and heated.
And why couldn't they just have a contractor come in after they bought the house and ADD a wet bar? Unless their arrangement prohibited and major changes?
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19 minutes ago, Sew Sumi said:
But you had to pay retail for your FIRST one to get a deal down the line. That's the way it works. I don't have Iphones, but theirs seem to have all the latest and greatest apps; do they sell refurbs like you can find with Androids (which usually suck? Mine died inside of a year)?
No, I got my first iPhone 2 years ago, got it for $50 w a 2 year contract.
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On 7/23/2016 at 8:25 PM, Arwen Evenstar said:
Not to mention they all have $600 to $800 iPhones. Yeah, they are so frugal, indeed!
Well, to be fair, I doubt they paid retail for their phones. I myself just for a brand new Iphone SE 64G for myself and a 6S for my daughter and paid $100 bucks each, when I re-upped my contract for 2 years.
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21 hours ago, Jynnan tonnix said:
I do think that this can be looked at in a variety of ways, though. I suppose that if it is ingrained in someone not to question things, then this sort of arrangement can work quite well...If one has no other experience and gives their heart completely to the first person to come along, then continues in a life in which there is very little contact with the opposite sex, then barring one of the couple being a truly heinous individual, it might simply not occur to them that it might be possible to be happier with someone else. Even in this day and age, even in this country, arranged marriages can and do thrive. It's still not uncommon in the Hindu culture, for example.
On the other hand, dating, even including premarital sex, can offer a perspective otherwise impossible on just who and what one is really looking for. But since it is very rare, I think, for anyone to truly find that person who completes them in every way, one either goes from partner to partner searching for something which will forever elude them, or settle down with someone who could probably make them as reasonably happy as one could expect, yet once the honeymoon is over, find themselves remembering, maybe, someone who broke their heart, and finding the current relationship empty and unsatisfying in comparison...Or just missing the "rush" of a new relationship in general.
I actually DO know somone who is married to a man who was arranged for her. She is a highly educated, professional woman of Indian birth. She explained to me that the way it works is that her parents sort of "screened" candidates and then they were presented to her. She was free to say "no" and did veto their first few choices. She is happily married with several children.
I think the key here is that what the Duggars do is basically arranged marriages, but they try to PRETEND that they are love matches. You can't have it both ways. Either you have taken time to get to know someone intimately and decide that you love him/her and want to commit forever, or else you're not. Walking down the aisle after "courting" for less than a year is basically commiting to someone you have a crush on, and just hoping it will become love. The pressure to be happy is tremendous, and once you're hitched, can you imagine trying to tell your folks that you DON'T LIKE your spouse?? Look what happenned to Anna!
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On 7/28/2016 at 10:37 AM, awaken said:
I see Jinger having her hand on his abdomen is ok during engagement. Another example of the couple developing their own rules! Abdomen-touching has been reserved for engagement.
Also Binjermin is wearing his LICE hat again.
Where in NYC is that? Just curious.
They have to be NIKE-ing all over the place. Standing right next to girls in shorts. Heck, Jeremy himself is in shorts! NIKE!
I think its allowed for ring display purposes only.
On 7/28/2016 at 11:28 AM, queenanne said:The new big group picture is by Rockefeller Center. I recognize the building materials. My guess is either they did the Today Show audience, or we will see them on it as guests.
Definatly. Think they went across the street to St Pat's? HAHAHAHAHAHA
22 hours ago, Sew Sumi said:Not the Olive Garden one? LOL
I really hope the Vuolos put on an authentic Italian spread for the rehearsal dinner and show Josie's face as she samples the antipasti.
Buy Olive Garden and pocket the difference!
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On 7/18/2016 at 10:49 PM, CofCinci said:
Coo coo ca choo, Mrs. Robinson.
You know she lusts after her daughters' partners -- except for Derick because he's not attractive in any sphere or sense.
I don't know, I think he could do OK at a Dead show.
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On 7/5/2016 at 0:35 AM, Arwen Evenstar said:
I imagine before Joshgate I, that would have been the case. All about squeaky clean, and nothing less than never kissed anyone. Trying to find a man suitable for Jana who'd never kissed a girl at that age, would have doomed poor Jana to lifelong spinsterhood or he would gave been so painfully homely that Jana would choose lifelong spinsterhood.
Though admirable to be able to maintain such a level of purity, it's not realistic for many Christians, so after being admonished to not be "a cup of spit", they may now have to settle for one. (Not our value judgment, but KJBs). It likely doesn't compute after this hyper vigilant state of uber purity to now accepting "gently used "born again virgins.
Is this because Boob is relaxing the rules out of necessity or is it because he's desperate to marry those girls off? I'd like to believe he's had an epiphany and has decided to use common sense, but I think it's more about the gravy train.
Buy used -- save the Jinger!
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On 7/7/2016 at 11:56 PM, clanstarling said:
I know, right? I support a family of four on less than that, without any shady dealings.
Presumably, your money doesn't go up your nose. Wouldn't be hard to party away a vast majority of that. I don't blame Sally for refusing to pay -- it obviously wasn't child support - it was blackmail. I guess Papa Rayburn was paying Eve to keep her out of their lives, but I also have trouble believing that it was due to the family's "reputation." Who cares that a grown man had an out-of-wedlock baby?
On 6/1/2016 at 4:33 PM, Maysie said:So I guess we missed the scenes when Meg explained to her brothers that this whole mess (coupled with her immaturity, poor decision making and basic irresponsibility) led to her firing. Or perhaps she's led them to believe that she willingly quit the job and NY life, which she claimed to love. And I guess my issue with that is that it appears to have made absolutely no impact whatsoever on her brothers. Instead John hits her up to be the campaign manager (which, what happened to the woman he was having lunch with - wasn't she supposed to do that? Why Meg? So she can get even more enmeshed in this mess he's creating?). Kevin sees his "rehab" as a "court thing," so no surprise that he's hiding bottles. FFS, he's about to be a father, something we're supposed to believe he's been pining for, and he doesn't appear to be at all interested in attempting to sober up. Anyway, I'm not much of a Meg fan, but her brothers are pretty cavalier about her job less. Sucks for her, I guess, but it's good for them. What a bunch of tools.
I read it as: she wanted Kevin to think she gave something up to help him. Bonus that she doesn't have to admit being fired.
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When I heard the name for the new baby, I thought at first, don't they already have one named that?? Ariella? Good Lord, my mother called me by the wrong name sometimes and there were only 3 of us.
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5 hours ago, Normades said:
Just to clarify, the claim of Sol on the phone with batfish was made by batfish, so I'm not saying it's absolute truth. However, from what I've seen of Meri's epic lack of good judgement, I tend to lean toward believing it. I think it goes a long way to show how much damage this caused. I, like others, would be a lot more sympathetic if she would take at least some responsibility and be truthful. It's also strange that she wanted to take Sol to visit Mariah --- the two Brown children who (depending on whether you believe batfish) had some kind of contact with batfish.
I agree, it is sad that Brianna was so easily offered up.
It made me wonder if she is a known Tattle Tale, sent along as Meri would know any Shenanigans would be reported back.
I do NOT "fill" bad for Meri, because she is just simply NOT taking any responsility. Sure, she's got a bunch of totally legit reasons she was vulnerable, sad, lonely etc etc. However, she is not owning what she did, she is not telling the truth, nor is she processing the truth, not trying to understand her "fillings." She is 100% trying to SPIN this, to get herself out of trouble. She will admit only to what is easily proved, but will never voluntarily reveal anything that makes her look bad. I truely believe there is something wrong with her and I doubt she truly feels bad about what she DID. She feels bad that she got caught, she is sorry she got caught, she fills bad for HERSELF.
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I must say, I also rolled my eyes into the back of my head when Meri said she took up "painting." I also spotted them as Paint n Sip creations...however, leave it to Meri to then RUN to the nearest crafts store and buy eleventy million brushes, paints, canvases, an easel, palettes, etc etc and set up a "Painting Studio" in one of her seventeen empty bedrooms.
Christine is probably cutting coupons to buy Mac n Cheese at Aldi and Jenelle is paying college tuition and for a wedding...and Meri is again buying all kinds of shit she doesn't need to fill up a house that is ten times larger than she needs. Wow -- what a shocker huh?
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Mariah showed signs of self-awareness that I hitherto though impossible from a Brown. I thought she sounded like she had had some therapy already, and I was so so glad to hear her say that it wasn't her mistake nor her responsibility to fix it.
I think it's 100% appropriate for a child to have concerns about their parent having an inappropriate relationship, if they know about it. I think Mariah was within her rights to tell Meri -- This is bad news, you should not be involved with another man to this degree. And if it was all innocent, why didn't she offer to bring him around her family? If they were "just friends" why the secrecy? In my experience, you only hide things that you know on some level you shouldn't be doing.
I think Meri has a personality disorder. BPD or Narcissism, or a combo. Her lack of personal responsibility is astonishing. She really does seem to think she is being persecuted because she said "sorry" and everyone didn't IMMEDIATELY forgive her. SHe seems to think that because she apologized (half-assed and half-heartedly) that there would be no repercussions.
Classic to me was her saying, in practically the same breath: "I damaged/broke trust," and "It's like they don't TRUST me!" and cue the tears.
I find it all manipulative and disingenuous.
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S03.E10: The After Show
in Counting On
Yes, that reminds me, did anyone else feel that the guy who asked, asked really meaningfully...."It's so good to have you home," with an undercurrent of "We weren't sure you would make it home." To which Jill said "It's great to be back" and that was the point where I felt Derrick got pissed off and looked angry as he said "Yes, it's good to be back for a while." I wondered if he had said that he did not want to discuss the dangerousness of Danger America.
I have mixed feelings about the DEFCON 1 level of concern. On the one hand, I thought that they were exaggerating to make themselves more heroic, but now I wonder. For Derrick to dodge the subject? Although I guess he might just be annoyed about how much the danger has become the focus of their storyline, instead of his good deeds or whatever. He may be aware it makes him look bad.
On the other had, it is dangerous in 3rd world countries in ways t is not here in the US. I think I would have been really frightened by a loud noise seemingly right outside my house, which is in the woods and likely there's really no reliable emergency responders. At home, you just call the cops. There? I don't know.