SmashleyMcSlayin
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Posts posted by SmashleyMcSlayin
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Wow, I just got to Jenelle’s ceremony and you guys weren’t kidding about how dumb her veil looked.
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Roxanne: “I don’t wanna be like that!”
Then... don’t be like that?
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Elizabeth’s head is like an unmashed potato
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4 hours ago, GreatKazu said:
Wtf. Maybe she should take a break from guys since she gets pregnant any time a dude looks at her.
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Waiting til the day before the wedding to lay a fuckton of sod. These people are so bright.
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8 hours ago, Baltimore Betty said:
Nicole strikes me as someone who might try to get pregnant to try and keep a man, fortunately it will not happen in Morocco but I bet the minute Azan steps foot in the USA Nicole will be tracking her cycles.
Does she have the intellectual capacity to track her cycles? Hell, I know she had May, but does she actually understand where babies come from?
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15 hours ago, Lm2162 said:
Responding to the "it's more common in women" thing-- Interestingly enough, it's actually just as common in men according to the most recent research, just less commonly diagnosed because it looks different in men (like autism and ADHD in women). Men with BPD are likelier to be seriously violent rather than dependent on a series of partners.
Something like 85% of women with BPD were sexually or seriously physically and psychologically abused as children. That's why I'm dubious that Jenelle has it, unless of course she's part of the other 15% (or maybe I just don't have any sympathy left for her and I'm overlooking too much of her past because of my hate-bias). I do know she has had trauma in her life, of course. I just don't see any empathy or vulnerability; even if severely mentally ill to the point of extreme debilitation, there would be moments of vulnerability and kindness. The statistical majority of people with BPD actually do get "cured" or "better," contrary to popular belief/media stereotypes. I just don't see that possibility in Jenelle. Of course, as you say, that could just be because she's an asshole and the mental issues are layered on top of that.
I could also just hate her so much that I'm not seeing things clearly anymore, lol. I got like that with Amber too.
Abuse is certainly one pathway by which people can come by BPD, but not the only way. What we refer to as an “invalidating environment” is the main pathway, and what this means is that the individual’s feelings and beliefs are made to feel untrue or questionable as a result of their environment and the people in it. Abuse can fall under that umbrella of an invalidating environment (e.g., sexual abuse by a family member - “I’m supposed to feel safe with this person but he hurt me”). Same with abandonment, and remember that Jenelle’s father left when she was young (“he’s supposed to love me but he left”). The invalidating environment can take other forms, such as a parent reacting badly when the child expresses emotions (e.g., “man up,” “stop crying or I’ll give you something to cry about”). I could believe that Barb might have created an invalidating environment for Jenelle in some ways.
So you’re correct that most individuals with BPD have suffered abuse, but even if Jenelle experienced no physical or sexual abuse, I’m not dubious at all about her probably meeting criteria for the diagnosis. I have seen more than a few patients in my practice who have BPD and report no abuse background.
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I read an article stating that Karine cheated with someone named Alex and that Pole and Karine have broken up. Anyone else heard this?
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50 minutes ago, MyPeopleAreNordic said:
I have only ever taken two undergrad psych classes, but have a family member with Narcissistic personality disorder (like diagnosed when the family member was institutionalized, not just I "think" she has it)....and Jenelle reminds me of that family member SO much. I also have a borderline in-law, and I definitely see that in Jenelle, too....and I think I've read the two are often co-morbid together. So I guess my input is with my completely inadequate ability to diagnosis, I think she's NPD and BPD.
That’s true, they often occur together, or as I said above, the person may qualify for a diagnosis of one PD and also demonstrate features of others. As another poster said, PDs are grouped into clusters A, B, and C based on similarities between the diagnoses. NPD and BPD are both cluster B and thus can have a lot of similarity and overlap.
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On 10/28/2017 at 1:47 PM, GreatKazu said:
To @citychic and the others who have experience and knowledge (thank you for posting the link above, btw), it reads above how Jenelle's personality type requires constant attention and needs guidance to making everyday decisions. Help me to understand something. Why is it Jenelle avoided her mother's guidance for so long growing up and yet, demands her mother's attention when she feels threatened such as when Jenelle threw a fit over Barb helping out Jenelle's sibling out of town and most recently when Jenelle blew up at the reunion because Barb gave a hug to Nathan's girlfriend? Those are just two examples, but there are a lot more.
I would disagree with the poster above who describes Jenelle as dependent PD. Certainly she has features of that diagnosis, but her behavior is better explained by a diagnosis of borderline, which is characterized by idealization and devaluation of others (viewing them as either all good or all bad with little in between). Notice how there are times when she gets along fine with Barb and her boyfriends but can so quickly flip the switch to fighting with them and hating them.
Other BPD symptoms:
Impulsive/risky behavior, angry outbursts, identity confusion, mood swings. Sound familiar?
Most people with personality disorders exhibit features of more than one, so again, Jenelle does have dependent PD features but it’s really not the best explanation for her behavior.
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3 hours ago, JuliesMommy said:
Id love to agree, but i think its too late for jenelle... shes passed the point of no return. Even if we take david out of the picture, theres a million other davids in line out there....and shes JUST the right idiot to pick em'. I think jenelle is purely driven by the "fame" that the show has brought her, including all the negativity not even the money....jmo
I definitely think that, as things stand now, you’re correct. My point is moreso that I think she’s an intelligent girl in a lot of ways, so if she was more self aware, she could make some major changes. But she’s not, so she won’t.
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12 hours ago, neenyah said:
I have to disagree on some points presented in this thread.
1) It was acceptable for young children to play outside by the road in an apartment complex.
I absolutely think it is not ok for a 6 and 8 year old to be totally unsupervised in a public area alongside the road. Not only are there physical hazards (playing by the road!) but in this sort of publicly trafficked area, who knows what could happen to them or what sort of predator could happen upon them? Not only was this not likely their first time outside alone, but they could easily be grabbed and driven off the main road with no one the wiser for quite a long time. By then they could be out of state, raped, sold into sex trafficking, or even murdered.
Yeah, it's not ok to have little children to play outside unsupervised along the road in the public eye. Wrong. Do we even believe this is the first time? No way. It's not even like they are on The Land playing in their own secluded space. Anyone can see and grab them.
2) Barb is 100% to blame for Jenelle's behavior.
Since when is one parent the only one responsible for a child? And since when is a 25 year old adult and willing parent of MULTIPLE children not responsible for their own behavior. Yeah, Barb may be histrionic and a yeller and everything else, but she is not responsible for the impact that the absentee, abusive father had on their children, nor is she responsible for genetic predispositions of which she was not aware (or that possibly didn't come from her). She is also not responsible for the willing choices that Jenelle made to leave her child, steal from Barb, become a heroin addict, or deal with, become pregnant by, and marry various abusive men.
Two parents were involved with creating Jenelle, and she is now a grown woman responsible for herself. To blame Barb only is IMO, very short sighted, revisionist, and absolving jenelle of blame in all her fucked up ways.
I will say in my uneducated yet personally experienced opinion, Jenelle suffers with Borderline Personality Disorder, which while really fucked up, doesn't absolve you from being a piece of shit asshole.
I’m a therapist and also believe she is borderline (obviously I’m not diagnosing someone I’ve never met, just my opinion). People with BPD are one of my favorite populations to work with because they can make huge progress when they really try. I wish Jenelle was motivated to make some changes. I think she could do really well in life if she would get some real help and take responsibility for herself.
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12 minutes ago, Sugar said:
I've just been catching up on the spinoff "Before the 90 Days", and if any of you folks haven't seen that one yet (I didn't know it existed until 3 days ago) - it's a doozie. Please do yourselves a favor and start watching immediately.
I bring that up, because Darcy reminds me a lot of Molly, yet her daughters had such a different reaction to their mom flying off to meet some stranger. I know there's a slight age difference, but it makes me wonder if there's more to the Molly story - if maybe she's done this so many times, that Olivia is now traumatized by the many men that have come and gone. Or maybe Molly just isn't as great a mom as she claims...? I'm not saying Olivia's reaction isn't justified (totally is!) - just made me curious if there was more to it that we're not being shown/told.There’s a whole forum for Before the 90 Days, bet you’d enjoy!
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7 hours ago, orangeiguana said:
So we have to wait until the girls have already been abused? Ok, good. Just, Olivia GTF out of there to save yourself. I was in a situation like this as a child and raped for 10 years. But that's OK, right? SHe's just a silly teen.
That’s exactly right. It’s how the system works. If everyone got reported because they’d maybe abuse their kids, CPS would be running around like chickens with their head a cut off (which, honestly, they already do) unable to assist children in truly dire circumstances, and a lot of people would be unnecessarily accused.
And I am also sorry for what happened to you, orangeiguana. I can understand how the situation might make you really angry and emotional given your experience.
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2 hours ago, CoachWristletJen said:
I thought about that, too, and that's where a call to Social Services would be beneficial
Except it wouldn’t be. As a mandated reporter, I can tell you that the criteria for CPS to investigate are pretty specific, and Molly moving in a boyfriend doesn’t meet the standard. There has to be some evidence of abuse or neglect: kids not being fed, allegations of sexual contact, bruising or other evidence of physical violence, etc.
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35 minutes ago, Granny58 said:
I have a Mormon friend whose children go or have gone to BYU and she said, definitely...it's marry for sex. I'm not Mormon, but I am a very fundamental Christian (in the classic sense described earlier), and both she and I can see the value in waiting. On the other hand, I can also see the danger in sex being the motivation to marry. It's really difficult to have a good answer to this.
I just think it’s a really dangerous mindset. In Evelyn’s situation, she went to Europe specifically to meet David, so I think she probably would’ve proceeded with the k1 process, sex or no sex, because she’s naive and thinks he’s her soulmate.
I too think there’s value in teaching young people to wait until they’re mature enough to have sex, but I think pushing them to wait until they’re married is unrealistic. After I broke my engagement to the king of the douches, I decided I wasn’t waiting anymore because I had no idea when I’d get married and didn’t want to put myself in the same position again of having my judgment compromised about a potential marriage. I didn’t get married until I was 28 and was glad I didn’t feel in a rush anymore. I admit that sex is a dumb thing to rush into a marriage for, but well, young people can be dumb. I sure was. Better to teach them to be safe and smart about sex.
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Just now, Bryce Lynch said:
I see your point, but imagine if you had slept with the brute and had his baby. Anyway, glad you had a happy ending!
God, what a nightmare that would’ve been.
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Just now, Bryce Lynch said:
Very, glad you didn't marry the bum!
I think it can work the other way. How many women who don't believe in waiting until they are married, end up having sex with that sort of abusive lout and then have an even harder time breaking things off? Some even become pregnant and are stuck with the abusive guy, in some form or another for the rest of their lives.
I think their purity culture is actually a positive thing, though I do see how it could cause some people to rush into marriages.
Thanks, me too.
Certainly it can work the other way. I just sort of have a hate-on for purity culture given my experience, and I also think it gave me some hangups that continue to impact me at times in my (very wonderful!) marriage today.
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The whole purity culture is disturbing to me, particularly as someone who grew up to believe I shouldn’t have sex until marriage. I ended up engaged at 22 to an abusive man. He didn’t become overtly abusive until after the engagement although there were red flags before, but “having” to wait for marriage to have sex caused me to ignore them and forge ahead.
I don’t think no sex til marriage is the only driving force for Evelyn to do the K1, as that’s one of the only ways for her and David to be consistently together rather than doing a long distance relationship. But I think, as many other posters have said, that the sex is a big part of that, and it makes me sad given the experience I had.
Edit: I should clarify that I did NOT marry the guy. Dodged a bullet there.
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2 hours ago, Pepper Mostly said:
Elizabeth wanting to be "submissive" is curious. Is she obsessed with 50 Shades? Is she one of the women who are turned on by the red pill nutbars? Her family are some sort of Quiverfull Duggar-esque group, maybe feminine submission is a virtue sought after. Sure, her sisters were trying to talk her off the ledge. But women who are part of groups like these love to proclaim that they are strong, independent women who choose to allow themselves to be led by their menfolk. I have to say I like the 50 Shades explanation better though. Just for the yuks.
I don’t get the impression that she wants or enjoys being submissive but rather that she is so obsessed with this guy that she’ll do anything to be with him. She’s one of these naive, insecure young girls who is desperate to be in a relationship, and Andrrrei being a sexy mysterious (in her mind) European increases his appeal and her desperation. He could probably start doing all kinds of shitty abusive things and she’d stay with him.
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Someone posted this on the 90DF Facebook, pretty good
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8 hours ago, Susie Derkins said:
Pepperoni rolls are best enjoyed directly from the oven and freshly buttered. I also make a marinara sauce to accompany mine and will add pepper jack cheese before baking for my spouse.
signed, an actual West Virginia
I first read this as “marijuana sauce”
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9 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:
Not doubting your interpretation, but I could see Kaiser screaming "feed me" if hays a phrase he hears a lot. Toddlers tend to repeat EVERYTHING they hear. If UBT yells "feed me!" to Jenelle or vice versa I 100% believe Kaiser would repeat that phrase.
I really can’t imagine David yelling “feed me.” I can see him yelling a lot of things, but not that.
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7 hours ago, Palomar said:
Jenny contacted lots of guys until one actually stuck. Unfortunately for her it was Larry. What you see is what you get.
I do understand the reluctance of Larry to eat the pig. It really turns me off to see the entire pig, head and all, myself. However, the meat itself IS delicious if you get the vision of the pigs head out of your thoughts. Regardless, he should have eaten a generous portion and been very complimentary and thankful for the meal that this family presented to him which they mentioned they only do for special occasions.
To be honest, I've always thought that Larry was mentally challenged. There are many mentally challenged people who function in the everyday world (I have a family member who is mentally challenged and holds down a job and is married) but they are not always aware of social situations. Larry really is one of those. I don't think he had any idea he was being rude....he just tells it like it is. There is no way Jenny will have the patience to be married to someone like Larry. But, she might just go ahead with a marriage and get the green card and take off....he is ripe to be taken advantage of that is for sure.
I think he does have a lower IQ but he also strikes me as someone who could potentially fall on the autism spectrum (awkwardness, trouble understanding social cues/situations, difficulty empathizing) with some social anxiety thrown in. (I’m a therapist)
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S08.E18: The Ties that Bind
in Teen Mom 2
Agreed, Roxanne has probably had a temper like this her whole life and therefore might not be sure how to manage anger when it comes up. But it should also be common sense to not blow up in a restaurant where other people are eating, in front of your young grandchild. A lot of people do argue in front of children though, so I recognize it isn’t quite as common sense as I’d like it to be.