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Quotes from OBAGinCF

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Stan: I have been coming to this park nearly every day for the past 38 years. I have seen heart attacks, marriage proposals, projectile vomit, desegregation. But never, I mean never, have I seen birds drop out of the sky.

Rhonda: Reverse psychology works. When we take away peoples' stuff at work, they really want it back.

Ernie: Jim, working the night shift sounds kind of fun. 
Jim: Well, there's always parking.

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Cody: "And, those chrysanthemums are way too tall for the podium, it's much smaller in person."

ETA:

Krystal: "Are you two gonna kill each other?"

Edited by EastCoast4Life
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Roger: Violence secures us all. Mine merely has your attention.
Krystal: Speak fucking English, asshole!

Roger: If you're going to use a gun, make sure it's loaded. And if you're going to blackmail someone, make a copy of the tape.

Krystal: Can I ask you something? Why don't you wear shoes?

Cody: I could get a job.
Krystal: Doing what?
Cody: I don't know. I've never had a job before.
Krystal: Jobs are hard, Cody.
Cody: That's why I've never had one.

Mimi: How old do you think I was when the first mall opened?
Krystal: Twelve.
Mimi: Forty four. I bet you think I was pants-less for the first forty four years of my life.

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