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Benjamin & Akinyi: Come On Down! You're the Next Contestant on "The (Bride)Price is Right!"


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On 10/1/2019 at 4:35 PM, iwasish said:

While Ben has no right to tell her how many drinks she can have, he has no obligation to pay for her drinks after she is clearly shitfaced. 

Exactly, and I have learned this in my life: if someone, anyone, tells u to put down ur drink, you do it, as they clearly have a good reason to tell u so

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11 minutes ago, Lily247 said:

Exactly, and I have learned this in my life: if someone, anyone, tells u to put down ur drink, you do it, as they clearly have a good reason to tell u so

I had a liking for drink in my earlier years, and the people who could have said something were too busy drinking themselves to tell me. 

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34 minutes ago, Lily247 said:

Wow, now thats creepy!!! 

You want creepy? There are men with an amputee fetish. Read an article once by a young woman who lost a leg in an accident, describing, amongst other things, all the weirdos who sought her out (the accident had made the news), trying to hookup with her.

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7 minutes ago, Gobi said:

You want creepy? There are men with an amputee fetish. Read an article once by a young woman who lost a leg in an accident, describing, amongst other things, all the weirdos who sought her out (the accident had made the news), trying to hookup with her.

Lost faith in humanity 😬

Edited by Lily247
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9 hours ago, Gobi said:

You want creepy? There are men with an amputee fetish. Read an article once by a young woman who lost a leg in an accident, describing, amongst other things, all the weirdos who sought her out (the accident had made the news), trying to hookup with her.

A few years back I saw a documentary about people who long to be amputees themselves.

The documentary is called "Whole" and it's shocking how badly these people want to have limbs removed etc..... I could barely watch because it was such a disturbing obsession.

So I guess it makes sense that there's other people who want to have sex with amputees.

Reminds me of the movie "Boxing Helena"  😲

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6 hours ago, Joan of Argh said:

A few years back I saw a documentary about people who long to be amputees themselves.

The documentary is called "Whole" and it's shocking how badly these people want to have limbs removed etc..... I could barely watch because it was such a disturbing obsession.

So I guess it makes sense that there's other people who want to have sex with amputees.

Reminds me of the movie "Boxing Helena"  😲

I saw that! 

That and the people who fall in love with inanimate objects: "married to the Eiffel tower" , there are kinks out there that make Ben and Akinyi look pretty tame.

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Goliath season 2 I think features an entire amputee fetish storyline.  

I feel bad because everyone wants to feel attractive and find love and not to be fetishized but sadly I think with amputees that has to be where it often goes. 

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Are people suggesting that Akinyi is being fetishized by Ben because she and his ex-wife are both dark skinned? Well then my ex has a 'fetish' for blondes, and I have a 'fetish' for brown-haired Dustin Hoffman-looking men.

Sometimes people just have a type. People tend to be attracted to a certain look for whatever reason. Doesn't make it a fetish.

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18 hours ago, Gobi said:

You want creepy? There are men with an amputee fetish. Read an article once by a young woman who lost a leg in an accident, describing, amongst other things, all the weirdos who sought her out (the accident had made the news), trying to hookup with her.

How is this not a TLC reality show yet?  "Legless Love", "Looking for My Better Quarter?"  

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22 minutes ago, deedee2 said:

Are people suggesting that Akinyi is being fetishized by Ben because she and his ex-wife are both dark skinned? Well then my ex has a 'fetish' for blondes, and I have a 'fetish' for brown-haired Dustin Hoffman-looking men.

Racial fetishism is a thing. I, like many others, have issues with legitimate discussion of it being brushed away as a "type" or mere "preference." If you've been on the receiving end of it, it is weird, gross, and demeaning. As a Black woman, I have. It is not flattering. Many many people of color have written about this subject, which is why I included some links about it. Part of the reason racial fetishism is dangerous is because it often includes crude cultural stereotypes grafted to them and sexualized.

1 hour ago, deedee2 said:

Sometimes people just have a type. People tend to be attracted to a certain look for whatever reason. Doesn't make it a fetish.

Part of the reasons racial fetishism can be dangerous is because of the source of "whatever reason" can be truly dangerous when these sexualized stereotypes slip past the boundaries of sexual relationships and make it into the cultural  consciousness. For example: Black men have big dicks, are macho, and are up for sex whenever. Fourteen year old Emmett Till gets lynched for allegedly whistling at a white woman. There's a similar stereotype for Black women. Rapes of Black women are vastly under reported and under prosecuted because the victims get that Black Jezebel label. The only reason the Daniel Holtzclaw case broke was because he finally raped a Black woman who was unassailably not that stereotype. Asian women are meek and submissive. It's why proto-abusers love to get into relationships with Asian women assuming that the woman will defer to the man all the time. When the woman isn't like it might cause her partner to quickly escalate to physical violence. And the thing about racial fetishism is that you're rarely treated like a unique individual by the fetishist. They aren't attracted to you; they're attracted to the stereotype.

Finally, no one suggested that Ben had a fetish for Black women because of his two relationships with Black women. It's because Ben has only articulated two things he likes about Akinyi: her looks (and skin) and her faith. Furthermore, he continues to be completely disinterested in her culture.

So no, it's not as simple as merely preference or akin to liking brunettes.

https://substance.media/shes-not-your-african-goddess-spicy-latina-or-jade-princess-she-s-a-fucking-person-1c4e1ecaab6b

https://medium.com/@nbcnewsylij/its-not-a-compliment-how-racial-fetishism-has-colored-online-dating-988c9a02cdc9

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/asian-fetish-dating-red-flags_n_5ce6ca27e4b05c15dea89437

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But again, Ben knows as much, and maybe more about akyini than anyone else on this show and no one else gets called out as a fetishist.  

As a black woman, I'm personally a little more concerned by the notion that if someone finds me attractive that they must have a fetish.  If a man comes up to me at a bar and talks to me without knowing anything about my personality is he a fetishist?  No, I'm just his type for whatever reason and he finds me attractive. 

I'm personally  more than a little put off by the idea that if a man finds me attractive there has to be some hidden racial historical motivation and I'm not somehow likeable or attractive on the strength of being cute or how I look.  

The idea that men who have a physical preference for black women are motivated by some sort of evil subconscious intention is something I don't particularly believe to be true.  I kinda find it demeaning and more than a little belittling to black women. 

Edited by RealReality
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1 hour ago, HunterHunted said:

Racial fetishism is a thing. I, like many others, have issues with legitimate discussion of it being brushed away as a "type" or mere "preference." If you've been on the receiving end of it, it is weird, gross, and demeaning. As a Black woman, I have. It is not flattering. Many many people of color have written about this subject, which is why I included some links about it. Part of the reason racial fetishism is dangerous is because it often includes crude cultural stereotypes grafted to them and sexualized.

Part of the reasons racial fetishism can be dangerous is because of the source of "whatever reason" can be truly dangerous when these sexualized stereotypes slip past the boundaries of sexual relationships and make it into the cultural  consciousness. For example: Black men have big dicks, are macho, and are up for sex whenever. Fourteen year old Emmett Till gets lynched for allegedly whistling at a white woman. There's a similar stereotype for Black women. Rapes of Black women are vastly under reported and under prosecuted because the victims get that Black Jezebel label. The only reason the Daniel Holtzclaw case broke was because he finally raped a Black woman who was unassailably not that stereotype. Asian women are meek and submissive. It's why proto-abusers love to get into relationships with Asian women assuming that the woman will defer to the man all the time. When the woman isn't like it might cause her partner to quickly escalate to physical violence. And the thing about racial fetishism is that you're rarely treated like a unique individual by the fetishist. They aren't attracted to you; they're attracted to the stereotype.

Finally, no one suggested that Ben had a fetish for Black women because of his two relationships with Black women. It's because Ben has only articulated two things he likes about Akinyi: her looks (and skin) and her faith. Furthermore, he continues to be completely disinterested in her culture.

So no, it's not as simple as merely preference or akin to liking brunettes.

https://substance.media/shes-not-your-african-goddess-spicy-latina-or-jade-princess-she-s-a-fucking-person-1c4e1ecaab6b

https://medium.com/@nbcnewsylij/its-not-a-compliment-how-racial-fetishism-has-colored-online-dating-988c9a02cdc9

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/asian-fetish-dating-red-flags_n_5ce6ca27e4b05c15dea89437

I respect your opinion, and I'm sure fetishizing Black women is a thing, but I tend not to jump directly to the worst possible interpretation of a situation, or automatically ascribe nefarious motives to people. It's quite possible that Ben's first love happened to be a Black woman, and so he associates good things with Black women, and therefore prefers them. Ben hasn't given me any indication that he has some creepy sexual fetish with Black women. He finds Akinyi very beautiful -- and I don't blame him because I think she's beautiful, too.

Edited by deedee2
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12 minutes ago, deedee2 said:

I respect your opinion, and I'm sure fetishizing Black women is a thing, but I tend not to jump directly to the worst possible interpretation of a situation, or automatically ascribe nefarious motives to people.

This.  The idea that black women have to automatically be suspicious or on guard for racial fetishism in social situations is ridiculous.

It's a lot of extra work for black women and it's a good way to scare away guys who may not have any ill intent becauase honestly if I were a guy and would be automatically subjected to such intense scrutiny of my possible motivations when approaching a woman I probably wouldn't want to be too involved with that woman either.  

Blonde women have been the ideal of beauty for years in the western world.....do we counsel blonde women to be on the lookout for being fetishized?

If someone, anyone treats another person poorly or like an object (which can happen to any woman or any man) that person should get out of a relationship or refuse to get involved in a relationship.  But this emphasis on black women being fetishized and presuming ill intent when a white man approaches a black woman as a potential mate just makes something taboo that really shouldn't be taboo. 

Edited by RealReality
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14 minutes ago, RealReality said:

 presuming ill intent when a white man approaches a black woman as a potential mate just makes something taboo that really shouldn't be taboo. 

This is why I loathe identity politics. It divides us into ever smaller groups and makes us all increasingly suspicious of each other.

Edited by deedee2
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Not sure if this has been posted before but here is Ben’s ex wife IG handle: cactus_fruit_juice. She posts some bits of tea here and there, and looks like a cool person. I don’t know what she saw in Ben. 

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59 minutes ago, Tini said:

Not sure if this has been posted before but here is Ben’s ex wife IG handle: cactus_fruit_juice. She posts some bits of tea here and there, and looks like a cool person. I don’t know what she saw in Ben. 

Well  hopefully that cactus fruit juice is non alcoholic, just sayin'

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17 hours ago, RealReality said:

Blonde women have been the ideal of beauty for years in the western world.....do we counsel blonde women to be on the lookout for being fetishized?

Perhaps. My bff is blonde with green eyes and men of color and Latinos have routinely fetishized her hair and eyes. And conversely some women have automatically hated her and used blonde as a pejorative. Yes it can be with used that way when said with disgust. She was even bullied out of a store by the women there who told her she didn't belong and needed to leave asap or else!

Edited by Ki-in
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6 minutes ago, Ki-in said:

Perhaps. My bff is blonde with green eyes and men of color and Latinos have routinely fetishized her hair and eyes. And conversely some women have automatically hated her and used blonde as a pejorative. Yes it can be with used that way when said with disgust. She was even bullied out of a store by the women there who told her she didn't belong and needed to leave asap or else!

As you pointed out, anyone can be objectified and so the lesson shouldn't be that everyone who finds someone else attractive should be suspect until they prove that they don't see that person as an object. 

Women can be objectified merely because they are women and some men don't think women are human beings with personalities and emotions, but are rather living blow up dolls.  

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18 hours ago, RealReality said:

Blonde women have been the ideal of beauty for years in the western world.....do we counsel blonde women to be on the lookout for being fetishized?

SUCH a good point, I never thought of that! No, we embrace and celebrate and congratulate the "blondes have more fun" idea and dye hair to artificially join the club! 

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11 hours ago, Tini said:

Not sure if this has been posted before but here is Ben’s ex wife IG handle: cactus_fruit_juice. She posts some bits of tea here and there, and looks like a cool person. I don’t know what she saw in Ben. 

I was just reading some of Bens ex-wifes posts and I'm wondering what she means by... "I had the same look when i found his ass on Craigslist"

She also seems to side with Akini about the "stepmother" issue and insinuates that Ben is a deadbeat dad or something.

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The thing with Ben that gives me pause is when Akini started to waffle about being a stepmom and he 1) seemed to dismiss it, 2) said they would pray and talk to people at church* and 3) it would be Akini's problem.  

Per #1:  Do not dismiss it - those feelings are valid.

Per #2:  the * is for this - look I have nothing against prayer and talking to folks at church, it is just this is about relationships and chemistry and if Akini ain't feeling it, any amount of forcing it will only backfire.  Plus it is really none of their business.

Per #3:  I have said it before, but it is YOUR problem, Ben.  THIS IS YOUR SON.

Ask yourself:  Who means more to you??  Akini, a girl you met A WEEK AGO or your SON??  She kept the whole "Oops the bride price means we are married not just engaged but I won't tell you that until the day before.  Oopsies!!!!"

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People like Ben just drive me crazy.

Not everyone can afford to be married, and Ben is one of them.

He needs to get a job, get a small apartment, keep his head down and go to work and save some money.  He has no business dragging someone else into his financial maelstrom.

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8 minutes ago, Floatingbison said:

People like Ben just drive me crazy.

Not everyone can afford to be married, and Ben is one of them.

He needs to get a job, get a small apartment, keep his head down and go to work and save some money.  He has no business dragging someone else into his financial maelstrom.

Come sit with me @Floatingbison.  I remarried two years ago and our wedding was just under $3000.  (We hosted around 50 people for a lunchtime ceremony.) That is small potatoes compared to what some people shell out.  You can't afford to get married?  Then you can't afford to be married.

I agree about Ben - he needs to downsize, keep up with any child support, obviously, pay himself first with an IRA, (I am big on that, lol)  And please don't take this in the way it may come off, but if you think Akini's family will not be expecting some sort of financial support.......think again.

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4 hours ago, Joan of Argh said:

I was just reading some of Bens ex-wifes posts and I'm wondering what she means by... "I had the same look when i found his ass on Craigslist"

She also seems to side with Akini about the "stepmother" issue and insinuates that Ben is a deadbeat dad or something.

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I love the tea that these ex-spouses spill, but so much of it seems self serving and mean spirited.  

I agree with her first point which is probably why Ben should have been looking for someone domestically.  Even someone from another state.  It's like daya and Brett, she had 90 days to get to know her stepchild....there couldn't really be a gradual introduction.  

Point 2 - if Ben is in arrears it should be settled in court before talking shit on social media.  If she has taken him to court to enforce the child support payments and talks shit because he still refuses to pay i say go for it. 

But if you're angry enough to go to social media you should be angry enough to file a case.  Particularly if your new man is having to pick up the slack because ben is underpaying.  

What makes sense to me is that Ben doesn't make any money and therefore hasn't been ordered to pay much in child support and his ex feels cheated.  It sucks, kids are expensive to raise.  But you can't get blood out of a stone so....

Point 3 - ewwwwww, if I had a young kid I sure wouldn't want to put that information about their dad out on social media. 

Edited by RealReality
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31 minutes ago, RealReality said:

I love the tea that these ex-spouses spill, but so much of it seems self serving and mean spirited.  

I agree with her first point which is probably why Ben should have been looking for someone domestically.  Even someone from another state.  It's like daya and Brett, she had 90 days to get to know her stepchild....there couldn't really be a gradual introduction.  

Point 2 - if Ben is in arrears it should be settled in court before talking shit on social media.  If she has taken him to court to enforce the child support payments and talks shit because he still refuses to pay i say go for it. 

But if you're angry enough to go to social media you should be angry enough to file a case.  Particularly if your new man is having to pick up the slack because ben is underpaying.  

What makes sense to me is that Ben doesn't make any money and therefore hasn't been ordered to pay much in child support and his ex feels cheated.  It sucks, kids are expensive to raise.  But you can't get blood out of a stone so....

Point 3 - ewwwwww, if I had a young kid I sure wouldn't want to put that information about their dad out on social media. 

Ya who knows what the real story is...

However I can't help but feel like Ben should concentrate on getting his own place and looking after his son. (apparently he lives in a bedroom at his pastors house) 

I think maybe his ex-wife is pissed because what little money Ben earns he chooses to spend it flying around the world chasing a new wife and coming up with money for bride prices and groceries etc for her family.

Almost all these people are so ill equipped to sponsor anyone let alone add in all the extra expenses... it just seems nuts to me.  😑

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12 minutes ago, Joan of Argh said:

Ya who knows what the real story is...

However I can't help but feel like Ben should concentrate on getting his own place and looking after his son. (apparently he lives in a bedroom at his pastors house) 

I think maybe his ex-wife is pissed because what little money Ben earns he chooses to spend it flying around the world chasing a new wife and coming up with money for bride prices and groceries etc for her family.

Almost all these people are so ill equipped to sponsor anyone let alone add in all the extra expenses... it just seems nuts to me.  😑

I agree, getting himself financially stable should be his goal right now.  

I guess, to me, if she thinks he has hidden extra income that should be spent on Grayson then she needs to take it up with the court before taking it up on social media.  

I don't know how much of this is coming out of Ben's pocket?  Does TLC not even cover the cost of the ticket?  I wonder if his congregation/pastor are helping him out since akyini is a good christian woman and all. 

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6 hours ago, RealReality said:

I agree, getting himself financially stable should be his goal right now.  

I guess, to me, if she thinks he has hidden extra income that should be spent on Grayson then she needs to take it up with the court before taking it up on social media.  

I don't know how much of this is coming out of Ben's pocket?  Does TLC not even cover the cost of the ticket?  I wonder if his congregation/pastor are helping him out since akyini is a good christian woman and all. 

If my church was "helping" some broke fool bring home an exotic bride, I would have plenty to say. What a waste of church resources.

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13 hours ago, RealReality said:

I love the tea that these ex-spouses spill, but so much of it seems self serving and mean spirited.  

I agree with her first point which is probably why Ben should have been looking for someone domestically.  Even someone from another state.  It's like daya and Brett, she had 90 days to get to know her stepchild....there couldn't really be a gradual introduction.  

Point 2 - if Ben is in arrears it should be settled in court before talking shit on social media.  If she has taken him to court to enforce the child support payments and talks shit because he still refuses to pay i say go for it. 

But if you're angry enough to go to social media you should be angry enough to file a case.  Particularly if your new man is having to pick up the slack because ben is underpaying.  

What makes sense to me is that Ben doesn't make any money and therefore hasn't been ordered to pay much in child support and his ex feels cheated.  It sucks, kids are expensive to raise.  But you can't get blood out of a stone so....

Point 3 - ewwwwww, if I had a young kid I sure wouldn't want to put that information about their dad out on social media. 

Makes me wonder why she let Grayson be on the show. So far, with all of Ben's shortcomings aside, he does come off as a good dad who is involved with his kid, and Grayson seems very bonded to and comfortable with him. 

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Here's my problem with the drunk Akini storyline. On one hand, she says he should lighten up because it was only one drink. But then on the other hand, she admitted that she blacked out and only remembered drinking and leaving her food, "that's it." After just one drink! (And according to her, it wasn't her first time drinking.) I think a lot of the criticism toward Ben is because he is not a likable character and Akini is - that's how it looks to me anyway. If Darcy got loaded at dinner to the point of not remembering, not eating, telling the waiter to bring her more drinks when Tom said she'd had enough and wanted to leave, I'm pretty sure I would agree with Tom if he was put off by it and said he didn't want to see that again. It wasn't a Real Housewives/girls' night out kind of event, it was their first real date at a restaurant for dinner. I did that once when I was really young. Went out to dinner for the first time with my husband's parents and aunt and uncle and drank way too much and felt like crap the next day and super embarrassed. One of those, I'LL NEVER DRINK AGAIN moments. I got over it, and of course did drink again, but I learned a lesson. Akini should just say I'm sorry that I embarrassed you, I did drink too much and I'll watch it next time. She doesn't have to submit to him about never drinking again, but at least acknowledge that it was inappropriate.

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3 hours ago, Teri313 said:

Here's my problem with the drunk Akini storyline. On one hand, she says he should lighten up because it was only one drink. But then on the other hand, she admitted that she blacked out and only remembered drinking and leaving her food, "that's it." After just one drink! (And according to her, it wasn't her first time drinking.) I think a lot of the criticism toward Ben is because he is not a likable character and Akini is - that's how it looks to me anyway. If Darcy got loaded at dinner to the point of not remembering, not eating, telling the waiter to bring her more drinks when Tom said she'd had enough and wanted to leave, I'm pretty sure I would agree with Tom if he was put off by it and said he didn't want to see that again. It wasn't a Real Housewives/girls' night out kind of event, it was their first real date at a restaurant for dinner. I did that once when I was really young. Went out to dinner for the first time with my husband's parents and aunt and uncle and drank way too much and felt like crap the next day and super embarrassed. One of those, I'LL NEVER DRINK AGAIN moments. I got over it, and of course did drink again, but I learned a lesson. Akini should just say I'm sorry that I embarrassed you, I did drink too much and I'll watch it next time. She doesn't have to submit to him about never drinking again, but at least acknowledge that it was inappropriate.

This x1000 though I find akyini incredibly unlikeable and I don't think she was drunk.  But your point is still right on money. 

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9 hours ago, Teri313 said:

Here's my problem with the drunk Akini storyline. On one hand, she says he should lighten up because it was only one drink. But then on the other hand, she admitted that she blacked out and only remembered drinking and leaving her food, "that's it." After just one drink! (And according to her, it wasn't her first time drinking.) I think a lot of the criticism toward Ben is because he is not a likable character and Akini is - that's how it looks to me anyway. If Darcy got loaded at dinner to the point of not remembering, not eating, telling the waiter to bring her more drinks when Tom said she'd had enough and wanted to leave, I'm pretty sure I would agree with Tom if he was put off by it and said he didn't want to see that again. It wasn't a Real Housewives/girls' night out kind of event, it was their first real date at a restaurant for dinner. I did that once when I was really young. Went out to dinner for the first time with my husband's parents and aunt and uncle and drank way too much and felt like crap the next day and super embarrassed. One of those, I'LL NEVER DRINK AGAIN moments. I got over it, and of course did drink again, but I learned a lesson. Akini should just say I'm sorry that I embarrassed you, I did drink too much and I'll watch it next time. She doesn't have to submit to him about never drinking again, but at least acknowledge that it was inappropriate.

Mr. Hanson once had a serious girlfriend, who, no lie, had one glass of wine was out there and two glasses?  Vomiting.  My awesome older brother, who was into health and fitness (he is a personal trainer!) waaaaay before it was hip, last had a drink in March 1986 and said, "I just not like how I felt the way the next morning, so......no thanks."  I truly believe some people are just not wired for the drink.

But I still stand with my theory that Akini was faking it to get the heck out of dodge,.

Edited by Mrs. Hanson
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9 hours ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

Mr. Hanson once had a serious girlfriend, who, no lie, had one glass of wine was out there and two glasses?  Vomiting.  My awesome older brother, who was into health and fitness (he is a personal trainer!) waaaaay before it was hip, last had a drink in March 1986 and said, "I just not like how I felt the way the next morning, so......no thanks."  I truly believe some people are just not wired for the drink.

But I still stand with my theory that Akini was faking it to get the heck out of dodge,.

I'm also one of those who chooses not to drink not because of alcoholism, but because of the horrible hangovers. in college my first chemistry professor talked about this once, he said he had very low levels of a certain enzyme that helps the liver process alcohol. So he didn't drink. I will have a glass once in a blue moon but I'm very careful.

People are all different. Personally I think this is just a story line.

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Maybe she just had not eaten or something. Was just unfortunate she went for it on their first night out together.  I was surprised the pillow talkers were on her side about it. No one disliked David’s drunk more than Annie. No one pushed drinking more than Elizabeth’s sisters. I thought it was a dumb move on Zucchini’s part and don’t believe she faked it to blow him off.  

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1 hour ago, Kareem said:

Maybe she just had not eaten or something. Was just unfortunate she went for it on their first night out together.  I was surprised the pillow talkers were on her side about it. No one disliked David’s drunk more than Annie. No one pushed drinking more than Elizabeth’s sisters. I thought it was a dumb move on Zucchini’s part and don’t believe she faked it to blow him off.  

I was surprised the Pillow Talkers were on her side as well.  He made it clear he does not want to see her drink to excess again, and I can't blame him for that.  He said yes, he drinks on occasion but that is it.  He was edited to come off as controlling when her family are the ones calling the shots.  I love my Dean and Tarik but I was kinda surprised when they said, and I paraphrase, "You NEVER want to see your wife drunk?"  No, not really, thanks!  Buzzy?  Sure.  One night Mr. Hanson (no work the next day and we were home) got buzzy and he was going to have more and I asked to please eat.  He willingly complied because.....well.....you folks can connect those dots!!!

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17 hours ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

I was surprised the Pillow Talkers were on her side as well.  He made it clear he does not want to see her drink to excess again, and I can't blame him for that.  He said yes, he drinks on occasion but that is it. 

I don't blame him, drunken behavior is obnoxious from anyone. 

That said, I just shudder when I think of him bringing her to the U.S. It's only natural that she will want to explore, to have fun, while he explains he just can't afford this or that. She will quickly get over the honeymoon phase when she moves into the pastor's guest room, ugh!

I gotta tell ya, I have a renewed appreciation for being born American, after watching the lengths people are going to to get here, unbelievable.

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11 minutes ago, blubld43 said:

I don't blame him, drunken behavior is obnoxious from anyone. 

That said, I just shudder when I think of him bringing her to the U.S. It's only natural that she will want to explore, to have fun, while he explains he just can't afford this or that. She will quickly get over the honeymoon phase when she moves into the pastor's guest room, ugh!

I gotta tell ya, I have a renewed appreciation for being born American, after watching the lengths people are going to to get here, unbelievable.

I thought he was going to stroke out when the groceries came to $80.  

If he's so broke that spending $80 makes a significant dent in his ready cash in a foreign country, he really has no business at all bringing anyone over here to be dependent on him.  And I say that with no judgment as I'm sure many of us have had times where $80 seemed like alot...but we weren't flying off to a foreign country trying to buy a spouse to rely on us for their necessities until they could get approval to work.  

He's not any better than the women on these franchises (Danielle comes to mind) who can barely take care of their families as it is yet want to bring another person into the mix.  

Akinyi might end up in a situation like Mo, with a spouse who suddenly has no job, utilities are being turned off, eviction notices are being issued, etc., and finds herself in (as @Drogo so brilliantly titled Aladin and Laura's thread) A Whole New World of Shit.  

I cringe every time the chucklefuck says "Grayson comes first."

No, buddy, if Grayson and his needs really came first, your ass wouldn't be over in Kenya trying to buy a bride you can ill afford.  Ugh.  

Edited by Persnickety1
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I have not read the whole thread, but I don't see anyone else commenting on her baby voice. It is very cute and sweet sounding, but I mean, really??? It is just so bizarre. In my opinion. 

As are her modeling photos above which I can see feature African print skirt and Victoria;s Secret leotard top? 🙂

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On 10/12/2019 at 9:37 AM, blubld43 said:

I don't blame him, drunken behavior is obnoxious from anyone. 

That said, I just shudder when I think of him bringing her to the U.S. It's only natural that she will want to explore, to have fun, while he explains he just can't afford this or that. She will quickly get over the honeymoon phase when she moves into the pastor's guest room, ugh!

I gotta tell ya, I have a renewed appreciation for being born American, after watching the lengths people are going to to get here, unbelievable.

A-freaking-men!

I love America, but I don't know that I love it enough to sleep with any of these guys ... particularly someone like Colt.  

I wonder if Ben is making $26k or if some benefactor is going to co sign?

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@Christina if you're somewhat familiar with Kenya, it was clear that Akinyi's family was Luo just based on Fidel being named Fidel. As she said, they tend to name children after important things in their lives at the moment. The dad was very Marxist and very anti-colonial at the time so he names his son Fidel Castro. Lupita Nyong'o was born in Mexico when her father was a professor so they named her a diminutive of Guadalupe. 

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On 10/13/2019 at 3:32 AM, Christina said:

Happy belated birthday, Akinyi! I hope you enjoyed your margaritas!

I meant to include this one, if these don't merge automatically.

Akinyi discusses her name's background.

Known for their tiny waist?  Akinyi must be either pregnant or adopted.  

Bikini is ruining Benjamin's life. He thinks she is so special and she's so not. Her personality is like a 3. Her sense of humor is a 2. Her ears are like a 7 and a 4. Add it all up and what do you get? 16. And he treats her like she's a perfect 40. It's nuts.

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On 10/13/2019 at 7:12 AM, mayvenne said:

I have not read the whole thread, but I don't see anyone else commenting on her baby voice. It is very cute and sweet sounding, but I mean, really??? It is just so bizarre. In my opinion. 

YES.  The baby voice is so awful.  SO WHINY.  

I ff thru their scenes for the most part, get me to the Tell Nothing.  

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